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This week's question comes from a listener's dad who wonders what are the signs that a child has received good parenting? As a good mommy to all of you, I of course have all the answers ;)

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If you have a question for the show, please send it to the show name at gmail dot com or via Patreon or Discord (links below)!
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Nic's sister Gina joins her today to talk about her lessons learned in dismantling her identity around productivity after suffering a major injury to her foot and having to be out of work for months. We also talk mommy issues (it's the new daddy issues! so 2021!) and also saunter into some queer conversations about gender. 

[Sorry this episode is a few days late. I'm suffering from intense autistic burnout from our fundraiser this weekend and several other things and this episode took several hours of editing for reasons I won't bore you with. I'll eventually get back on the regular 'every other Tuesday' schedule but in the meantime, thank you for your patience. Life has been dog-piling me lately <3)

Help Gina Out:

• PayPal (preferred) - make sure to put "for Gina" in the note so I know to send it to her!
• GoFundMe - best for sharing on social media!
• Buy Some Jewelry from Gina's business, In The Middle Custom Jewelry

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If you have a question for the show, please send it to the show name at gmail dot com or via Patreon or Discord (links below)!
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Riikka from our Discord community writes:

I'd like to hear you talk about impostor syndrome, what is your relationship with it and how to fight it. I'm looking for jobs right now & I feel extremely uncomfortable talking about my skills and achievements and I'm constantly downplaying them.

As someone who has (mostly) overcome imposter feelings, I was thrilled to give my top 6 tips for overcoming imposter phenomenon/syndrome:

1. Recognize it as a trauma response, rather than a logical fact
2. Get a hobby you are bad at
3. Gather empirical evidence of your greatness
4. Make a list of your strengths
5. Develop a sense of self
6. Get over yourself!

Resources
Fundraiser:

• Professer Flower's (Lua's) Channel - follow for updates about fundraiser!
• Gina's GoFundMe page - donate/share!

Imposter Phenomenon Resources:

• Feel like a fraud? (American Psychological Association)
• Yes, Impostor Syndrome Is Real. Here's How to Deal With It (Time.com)
• The Imposter Phenomenon in High Achieving Women: Dynamics and Therapeutic Intervention (1978 paper by Imes & Clance)

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If you have a question for the show, please send it to the show name at gmail dot com or via Patreon or Discord (links below)!
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This week's question, from community member Dustin, is around surviving capitalism as a leftist:

Hey, Nic
I was wondering if you could do an advice episode on how a leftist can thrive in a capitalist society, while avoiding burnout or not succumbing to depression or other physical and mental ailments?? It’s something I constantly struggle with and I’m sure many others are suffering with it as well.

Important Links:

• Gina's Gofundme
• Speciesism episode on The Vegan Vanguard
• A Little to the Left YouTube channel

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If you have a question for the show, please send it to the show name at gmail dot com or via Patreon or Discord (links below)!
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This week, Nic tackles a question about how to be on a well-established work team as a new person when you're also autistic. Tips for how to navigate small talk, connect with people one-on-one or in small groups, and show yourself to be a good teammate ahead!

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If you have a question for the show, please send it to the show name at gmail dot com or via Patreon or Discord (links below)!
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Nic ecstatically tackles this week's question from Anonymous about a past love who has remerged, seemingly evolved and ready to commit, while they had done a lot of work to move past them and are now in a healthy relationship. Anonymous asked specifically about trauma bonds, as they feel very bonded to this person and are questioning if that is why they still feel so in love with them or if it is because there's something real there. Trauma bonds are discussed in detail, and Nic gives some of her own past experiences for flavor.

Resources

• Trauma Bonding Using Real Life Examples (Reach Counseling) 
• Trauma Bonds: What Are They and How Can We Overcome Them (The Hotline) 
• Trauma Bonding (Abuse and Relationships.org) 
• Trauma Bonding Signs (Healthline) 

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If you have a question for the show, please send it to the show name at gmail dot com or via Patreon or Discord (links below)!
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Nic is joined this week by Jewish activist, Jacob Z, to talk about Israel's military occupation of Palestine.

Jacob walks us through the history of the occupation at a high-level, talks about the pinkwashing and veganwashing of the Israeli military, gives tips about how to discuss the situation without being antisemitic as well as how to refute Zionist arguments, and provides a ton of recommended resources for further education, all listed below.

Please follow and support Plant the Land Team Gaza!

Resources
Videos

• Michael Brooks on Israel/Palestine: "It's not complicated" (YouTube)
• ISRAEL'S ALLIANCES TO DESTABILIZE MIDDLE EAST Max Ajl (YouTube)

PDFs/Articles

• Understanding Antisemitism: An Offering to Our Movement (PDF) | Jews for Racial & Economic Justice
• The Jerusalem Declaration on Antisemitism (PDF) | JerusalemDeclaration.org

Books

• An Army Like No Other: How the Israel Defense Force Made a Nation | by Haim Bresheeth-Zabner
• Ethnic Cleansing of Palestine | by Ilan Pappe
• The Hundred Years' War on Palestine: A History of Settler Colonialism and Resistance, 1917–2017 | by Rashid Khalidi
• Goliath: Life and Loathing in Greater Israel | by Max Blumenthal
• Decolonizing Israel, Liberating Palestine Zionism, Settler Colonialism, and the Case for One Democratic State | by Jeff Halper 

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Today's question comes from Jasper, who asks about moving beyond frustration with a partner who is otherwise amazing but breaks one boundary that has been explicitly set and talked about. I broaden the question to include behaviors that we just don't prefer (like leaving dirty dishes in the sink), as well as established boundaries (like no flirting in front of me).

I ramble around and hopefully hit on some points to consider, while also trying to caution against essentially gaslighting yourself into accepting boundary-breaking in a relationship.

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If you have a question for the show, please send it to the show name at gmail dot com or via Patreon or Discord (links below)!
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In this episode, Nic tackles a question that has come up in multiple conversations - how to develop a strong sense of self?

Question from Yesim: In a few of your episodes you talk about the theme of having a ‘strong sense of self’. I don’t consider myself to have this. In your earlier episode you mentioned how you didn’t have a strong sense of self in the past. I’d love to hear how you cultivated that.

Nic talks about her own journey to having a strong sense of self and what causes us to have a weak sense of self in the first place. She talks about things like being raised by parents that struggle with alcoholism, emotional immaturity, mental health issues, or who simply don't know how to meet an autistic child's needs, and what steps you can start taking today to make progress towards meeting your true self <3

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If you have a question for the show, please send it to the show name at gmail dot com or via any of the social media links below!
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After suffering from fatigue so intense it caused an existential crisis, I decided to do an unscripted loose rant about my experiences as a disabled person dealing with vaccine side effects and the reality of never feeling safe; people and their need to believe they are fully formed at your expense; and the frustration of people trying to "help" you so they can feel good about themselves.

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If you have a question for the show, please send it to the show name at gmail dot com or via any of the social media links below!
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