Qualified for Nothing

Qualified for Nothing

By meme farmer studiosComedy
Download on the App Store

Qualified for Nothing episodes

  • Destroying your family by forgetting your sister, Inviting the entire world to your wedding, and throwing Red Wine at a Toddler

    In this week's episode of Qualified for Nothing, despite what they say, Kim and Celaine don't get married (yet), but instead Celaine talks about the dangers of not inviting someone you've never met to the wedding you didn't even want, Kim tells us that the worst way to get people to buy you gifts on your registry is to invite your entire Facebook friends list, and Hamish encourages our dear audience to throw red wine at small children in white dresses (at weddings only).


    Follow  ⁨@CelainesASMR⁩ : https://linktr.ee/celainesasmrFollow  ⁨@idakim⁩ : https://idakim.carrd.co/Follow  ⁨@memefarmerhamish⁩ ⁠⁠⁠: https://memefarmerhamish.com/pages/socialsGot a problem you want our (un)qualified advice on? Send us an message at https://qualifiedfornothing.com/

    34 min
  • Teaching your Baby to Count Cards instead of Cocomelon, What to do when your Mom has an AI Therapist, and grounding your kids for eating Cheese

    This week on Qualified for Nothing, Hamish thinks you should teach your 11 month old baby how to count cards and gamble instead of sitting them in front of Cocomelon, Kim thinks you should probably stop having parents if they use AI for therapy, and Celaine explains that the best way to punish a cheese stealing child is to remove their doors (or shrimp 'em).Follow  ⁨@CelainesASMR⁩ : https://linktr.ee/celainesasmrFollow  ⁨@idakim⁩ : https://idakim.carrd.co/Follow  ⁨@memefarmerhamish⁩ : https://memefarmerhamish.com/pages/socialsGot a problem you want our (un)qualified advice on? Send us an message at https://qualifiedfornothing.com/

    33 min
  • Deciding if your Husband needs a day off, Leaving your Disabled Partner and calling your new friend Homeless

    In the 10th episode of Qualified for Nothing, the world's greatest* advice podcast, Kim tells us that you should treat your husband to a day off with all of the stresses that childbirth puts a man through, Celaine debates whether it's a good idea to leave your disabled partner, and Hamish tells you that you should probably help out your homeless friend. Or don't. What do we know? We're not qualified.


    *as rated by qualifiedfornothing.com's top 10 podcast list

    Follow  ⁨@CelainesASMR⁩ ⁠⁠⁠: https://linktr.ee/celainesasmrFollow  ⁨@idakim⁩ : https://idakim.carrd.co/Follow  ⁨@memefarmerhamish⁩ : https://memefarmerhamish.com/pages/socialsGot a problem you want our (un)qualified advice on? Send us an message at https://qualifiedfornothing.com/

    52 min
  • Leaving your wife at home for a Wedding, How to tell your kids Harry Potter isn't real, and roasting your friends alive in your truck

    Kim explains what happens when your wife gets uninvited from your friend's wedding, Hamish finds out that Santa isn't real, and Celaine tells us the consequences of boiling your friends in your truck (while Hamish teaches you how to siphon gas)
    Follow  ⁨@CelainesASMR⁩ : https://linktr.ee/celainesasmrFollow  ⁨@idakim⁩ : https://idakim.carrd.co/Follow  ⁨@memefarmerhamish⁩ : https://memefarmerhamish.com/pages/socialsGot a problem you want our (un)qualified advice on? Send us an message at https://qualifiedfornothing.com/

    46 min
  • Going on a Date with Jeffery Dahmer, How to Poop in the Urinal, and getting Catfished on Match.com

    Kim discusses what life would be like with Jeffery Dahmer, Celaine teaches us the best way to ruin a date is by pooping in a urinal and Hamish explains the one time he was a catfish.

    Follow  ⁨@CelainesASMR⁩ ⁠⁠⁠: https://linktr.ee/celainesasmr

    Follow  ⁨@idakim⁩ : https://idakim.carrd.co/

    Follow  ⁨@memefarmerhamish⁩ ⁠⁠: https://memefarmerhamish.com/pages/socials


    Got a problem you want our (un)qualified advice on? Send us an message at https://qualifiedfornothing.com/

    34 min
  • To Shrimp or not to Shrimp, Sending 1000 Ladybugs in the mail, and proposing to your partner THREE times in ONE night

    Kim discusses why you shouldn't propose to your partner three times in one night, Hamish teaches you how to send 1000 ladybugs in the mail (you can really do that) and Celaine informs the masses on how to successfully stink out a room.


    Follow ⁠⁠ @CelainesASMR ⁠⁠: https://linktr.ee/celainesasmr

    Follow ⁠⁠ @idakim ⁠⁠: https://idakim.carrd.co/

    Follow ⁠⁠ @memefarmerhamish ⁠⁠: https://memefarmerhamish.com/pages/socials


    Got a problem you want our (un)qualified advice on? Send us an message at https://qualifiedfornothing.com/

    41 min
  • How to become Portuguese, Listening to Smut with your Coworkers and Rescuing a Topless Woman

    Celaine teaches us the best way to become Portuguese, Kim discusses the best way to avoid listening to smut in your car and Hamish debates the ethics of saving people from drowning.


    Follow ⁠ @CelainesASMR ⁠: https://linktr.ee/celainesasmr

    Follow ⁠ @idakim ⁠: https://idakim.carrd.co/

    Follow ⁠ @memefarmerhamish ⁠: https://memefarmerhamish.com/pages/socials


    Got a problem you want our (un)qualified advice on? Send us an message at https://qualifiedfornothing.com/

    34 min
  • Smelly Roommates, An Ex-Friend who won't Leave You Alone, and Cheating on your Partner with a Robot

    Celaine tells us a story about bean-addicted Jim, Kim explains the best way to deal with a scummy ex-roommate who just won't leave you alone, and Hamish asks the gang their stance on AI partners.Follow  @CelainesASMR : https://linktr.ee/celainesasmrFollow  @idakim : https://idakim.carrd.co/Follow  @memefarmerhamish : https://memefarmerhamish.com/pages/socialsGot a problem you want our (un)qualified advice on? Send us an message at https://qualifiedfornothing.com/


    35 min
  • Falling in Love with a Cheater, Framing Your Toxic Ex and Ruining Your Family

    Hamish tells the story of someone fawning for a cheater, Kim discusses divorce with kids, and Celaine dives deep into an affair via takeout (while Hamish teaches you how to frame your cheating partner - but we don't talk about that part).


    Got a problem you want our (un)qualified advice on? Send us an message at https://qualifiedfornothing.com/

    49 min

About Qualified for Nothing

From the publisher's feed

The advice podcast you didn't know you needed. Soothing specialist Celaine's ASMR, whispering wonder IdaKim and comedy genius meme farmer hamish team up and give their unqualified opinions on your…