Recovery Road

In A Gentle Path Through the Twelve Steps, Dr. Patrick Carnes offers the Steps as a pattern of practices and habits that make lasting recovery possible. We can use these principles as a guide to a new way of living--letting go of our old ways of thinking and acting and accepting that change in our lives is both ongoing and inevitable.

Our addictions kept us isolated from others--even the people we hurt. They also often made us strangers to ourselves. Those of us who also live with a mental disorder can have a hard time figuring out which of our diseases has done the most harm, and how we can possibly start healing our relationships as well as ourselves. This can make the direct amends of Step Nine feel almost impossible.

We probably started to learn about being "responsible" at a young age. Our guardians, teachers, and employers may have used the word numerous times, reminding us to hold ourselves accountable. But what does responsibility look like now that we're in recovery?

Craig Nakken can help. In his book The Addictive Personality: Understanding the Addictive Process and Compulsive Behavior, Nakken helps people understand the process of addiction as well as the progressive nature of the disease and how to be healthy and happy and sober. We can use Nakken's insights&--including those having to do with the value of responsibility--to keep building a successful recovery.

In her book When Reality Bites: How Denial Helps and What to Do When it Hurts, Holly Parker provides exercises and personal stories that can help us understand and accept the positive uses of denial and learn to move past it when it becomes counterproductive. This excerpt introduces five different ways people tend to point the finger and avoid responsibility in relationships.

In her book The Next Happy, Tracey Cleantis offers a roadmap for letting go of a dream that isn't working and teaches us how to set realistic goals for finding a new way forward. This excerpt describes how envy, guilt, and shame—what Cleantis calls the "Trio of unwelcome feelings"—can get in the way of our progress. We don't have to let these emotions rule our lives.

For decades, the book A Program for You: A Guide to the Big Book's Design for Living has helped millions of people understand and apply the Twelve Steps to their lives and find an authentic path to recovery. In this excerpt, the authors describe the Program as a process of finding harmony with the activity and will of a Higher Power, which includes the work of setting things right with the people we've harmed.

In their book What Went Right, Dr. Michael G. Wetter and Eileen Baley introduce easy-to-understand principles and techniques for recognizing and intervening against self-defeating thought processes and improving self-esteem. This excerpt includes tips for avoiding personalization and blame—two unhealthy responses to feelings of guilt.

In her book The Recovering Body: Physical and Spiritual Fitness for Living Clean and Sober, Jennifer Matesa offers a guide to achieving physical recovery as part of our path to lifelong sobriety. This excerpt offers tips for meditation and can encourage us to create a healthy new habit.

In his book Undrunk: A Skeptic's Guide to AA, A. J. Adams describes how joining Alcoholics Anonymous changed his preconceptions about recovery and what could work for him. In this excerpt, Adams describes what the program taught him about real humility as well as the type of action that produces change on the road to recovery.

In her book A Woman's Way Through the Twelve Steps, Dr. Stephanie Covington guides readers along the Twelve Step journey through the lens of women's perspective. In this excerpt, we learn how Step Seven can help us stay conscious and aware of our actions. Most of all, it lets us ask for help letting go of the results.