“I accept my mom for who she is, not for who I wish she had been…”

For so many immigrant daughters, love and guilt are woven together. We grow up hearing about sacrifice, survival, and “everything we did for you” — while quietly carrying our own shame, anger, and longing to be truly seen.

In this powerful conversation, Dr. Payal Beri sits down with Serena, author of Unbound: The Story of an Immigrant, to explore what it really means to honor your parents’ story without abandoning yourself.

They talk about growing up Asian in the West, the unspoken rules in immigrant homes, and the moment Serena realized she had to stop waiting for her mother to become someone else — and instead ask, “What is she here to teach me?”

From mother–daughter wounds and intergenerational fear to building a “bridge” strong enough for parents, kids, and future generations to stand on together, this episode is an invitation to become unbound in your own life.

If you’ve ever felt torn between loyalty to your family and loyalty to yourself, this conversation is for you.

🔍 In This Episode, We Talk About:

• Accepting parents “as they are” vs who we wish they had been
• The unique guilt and pressure on kids of immigrants
• Growing up Asian in Canada and living between cultures
• Mother–daughter dynamics, anger, and the grief of what you didn’t get
• Reframing: “What is she here to teach you?”
• Why survival mode leaves little room for feelings or therapy
• “Airing dirty laundry” vs telling the truth with love
• How shame and silence create a gap between generations
• Building a bridge between our parents’ traditions and our own lives
• Hyper-independence, money, and the myth of “I can do it all alone”
• Finding the middle ground: empowered and in relationship
  
  

Connect with our Guest, Serena 

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/serena_arora/

Buy the Book: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0FQ381KK1?ref_=pe_93986420_775043100

Connect with Dr. Payal Beri & Reframing Perspectives:

• Instagram – Dr. Payal: https://www.instagram.com/dr.payalberi
  
  
• Subscribe on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@payalberi?sub_confirmation=1
  
  
• RK Empathy: https://www.rkempathy.com
• LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/payalberi
• Speaking & Media: https://www.payalberi.com

“If you don’t find a romantic, sexual partner, you will be alone forever.”

That’s the story many of us are sold: if you’re not in a couple, you’re failing at connection. For David Jay, it was more than a fear — it felt like a guarantee. As an asexual person, he couldn’t see himself in the scripts our culture hands us about love, partnership, and family.

Today, he’s living a life his younger self didn’t think was possible:

• co-parenting in a three-parent family,
• raising two kids,
• and building movements rooted in human connection and collective care.
  
  
  

In this conversation, Dr. Payal Beri sits down with David Jay — founder of the Asexual Visibility and Education Network (AVEN) and author of Relationality: How Moving from Transactional to Transformational Relationships Can Reshape Our Lonely World — to rethink what counts as a “real” relationship.

They dive into why we treat romantic love as the only path out of loneliness, how capitalism and tech have turned connection into a transaction, and what it would look like to normalize all forms of love: platonic, communal, familial, and interdependent.

If you’ve ever felt “behind” because you’re not partnered, wondered if you’re “the problem” for not fitting the couple script, or craved a life built on chosen family and community — this episode offers a different map.

🔍 In This Episode, We Talk About:

• “I will be alone forever.”
• Founding AVEN & naming a spectrum
• Breaking the couple script
• A three-parent family in real life
• Hyper-independence as a trap
• Friendship vs ‘Plan B’
• Collective care → collective power
• The audience is not the community
• Tech, AI & connection
• Class, gatekeeping & “self-made” myths
• Relational agency & reframing loneliness
  
  

Practical steps to build community
 From game nights and taco runs to recurring meetups: small, repeatable actions that turn strangers into real relationships over time.

Connect with David Jay:

• Book & contact: relationalitybook.com (as mentioned in the episode)
  
  
• Asexual Visibility and Education Network (AVEN): asexuality.org

Connect with Dr. Payal Beri & Reframing Perspectives:

• Instagram – Dr. Payal: https://www.instagram.com/dr.payalberi
  
  
• Subscribe on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@payalberi?sub_confirmation=1
  
  
• RK Empathy: https://www.rkempathy.com
• LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/payalberi
• Speaking & Media: https://www.payalberi.com

“My whole life was curated by design to create safety… but safety was my parents’ trauma.”

We’re told self-love is selfish. That “good” women, daughters, wives, and mothers put everyone else first — family, partner, community — and then maybe think about themselves. But what happens when that script leaves you resentful, exhausted, and living a life that was never truly yours?

In this powerful episode, Dr. Payal Beri sits down with Dr. Jasmine Escalera, Spiritual Neuroscientist, “Queen of Reinvention,” and founder of The Courage Crew, a global community for women reinventing their lives at any age.

Jasmine shares her journey from growing up in the projects of Brooklyn in the 80s and 90s to checking every box of the “safe” life (degree, six-figure job, marriage)… and realizing she was living out her parents’ trauma rather than her own truth. After divorce, a repeat heartbreak, and a move from New York to Miami, she rebuilt her life through radical self-love, boundaries, and daily choices to pick joy over fear.

If you’ve ever felt guilty for setting boundaries, afraid to disappoint your family, or torn between being the “good” one and being yourself, this conversation will hit home.

🔍 In This Episode, We Talk About:

• Safety vs. self-betrayal
• Growing up in the projects of Brooklyn
• Giving from your core vs. your overflow
• Guilt, boundaries & collectivist cultures
• Armor, vulnerability & failed relationships
• Checklist life vs. chosen life
• Moving to Miami & healing away from the origin of pain
• Resentment, parents & self-acceptance
• “I choose”: transformation in tiny moments
• Excuses, nervous system & comfort zones
• Community, allies & not cutting everyone off
• Dreaming of partnership after self-love

Connect with Dr. Jasmine Escalera:

• Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/jasmineescaleracoaching Instagram
• The Courage Crew (reinvention community for women): join via links in her Instagram bio or search “The Courage Crew Jasmine Escalera”
• Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/@drjasmineescalera

Connect with Dr. Payal Beri & Reframing Perspectives:

• Instagram – Dr. Payal: https://www.instagram.com/dr.payalberi
  
  
• Subscribe on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@payalberi?sub_confirmation=1
  
  
• RK Empathy: https://www.rkempathy.com
• LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/payalberi
• Speaking & Media: https://www.payalberi.com

So many of us are surrounded by people and still feel emotionally starved. In this Solo Reframe episode, we explore why depth, emotional safety, and being held (not just needed) matter so much—especially for changemakers and “the strong friend.”
Have you ever felt lonely in a room full of people you know—friends, coworkers, other parents, your “community”—and still felt unseen?
You’re not alone. And there’s nothing wrong with you.

In this Solo Reframe episode, we dig into:

• Why so many of our relationships stay on the surface
• The “Pinterest-perfect” performance culture that starves us of real intimacy
• The hidden loneliness of changemakers, caregivers, and the “strong friend”
• Why being needed is not the same as being valued
• How Payal started hosting changemaker dinners with two rules: no egos, no titles
• The birth of the Empathy Storytelling Salon and what happens when people are allowed to arrive as humans, not résumés
• Why depth, beauty, and emotional nourishment are not indulgences—but fuel
  
  

You’ll hear stories of nonprofit founders, doctors, social workers, parents, and entrepreneurs who spend their lives pouring into others… and what happened when they were finally given a room that poured back into them.

This episode is for you if:

• You’re the one everyone leans on—but no one really checks on
• You’re craving emotionally rich friendships and community, not just networking
• You’re tired of relationships that stay in “polite small talk”
  
  

You want to create spaces where people feel safe, seen, and deeply valued

Connect with Dr. Payal Beri & Reframing Perspectives:

• Instagram – Dr. Payal: https://www.instagram.com/dr.payalberi
  
  
• Subscribe on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@payalberi?sub_confirmation=1
  
  
• RK Empathy: https://www.rkempathy.com
• LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/payalberi
• Speaking & Media: https://www.payalberi.com

We usually think “legacy” means wills, trusts, and what people get after we’re gone.
Lawyers, paperwork, awkward conversations about who gets the house… and a lot of avoidance.

But what if legacy isn’t what you leave behind — it’s how you live, how you communicate, and how you prepare your family while you’re still here?

In this powerful episode, Dr. Payal Beri sits down with Lisa McCurdy, estate & legacy attorney, founder of The Wealth Counselor and Defining Legacy Group, who has spent nearly two decades guiding high-net-worth families through generational wealth, family conflict, and the emotional “cancer” of things that are never said out loud.

Lisa McCurdy - Wealth and Legacy

Lisa shares how caring for an elderly uncle with dementia — and being forced into a public guardianship process — completely changed her career and led her to reframe legacy as connection, intention, and celebration, not just legal documents.

Together they explore:

• Why “whatever you’re avoiding will come out” if you don’t address it head-on
  
  
• How unspoken stories, labels, and secrets quietly divide families over time
  
  
• The client who received a surprise $10M inheritance… and felt guilty accepting it
  
  
• Why wealth in families of color is often hard-fought and especially vulnerable
  
  
• How to choose the right people to make financial & medical decisions for you
  
  
• The role of the “anchor” (often a woman) who quietly carries the family’s emotional + logistical load
  
  
• How one family with 11 owners of land + a business used an apprenticeship program to create healthy succession instead of resentment
  
  

If you’ve ever worried that your family might one day explode over money, wills, or “who got what” — or you’re the person everyone expects to handle everything — this conversation will help you see legacy as an act of love, clarity, and emotional generosity, not fear.

Connect with Lisa McCurdy:

• Website – Legacy Makers & resources: lisagmccurdy.com
   Lisa McCurdy - Wealth and Legacy
• LinkedIn: Lisa McCurdy
• Instagram: @lisagmccurdy

Connect with Dr. Payal Beri & Reframing Perspectives:

• Instagram – Dr. Payal: https://www.instagram.com/dr.payalberi
  
  
• Subscribe on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@payalberi?sub_confirmation=1
  
  
• RK Empathy: https://www.rkempathy.com
• LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/payalberi
• Speaking & Media: https://www.payalberi.com

What if your legacy isn’t who you raise, but what you build, give, and live while you’re here?
In this episode, we unpack money, aging, and legacy when you’re childfree by choice—and the guilt, bias, and freedom that come with it.

When people say “legacy”, they almost always mean children.
But what if you don’t want kids—or can’t have them—and you still care deeply about impact, contribution, and who will support you as you age?

In today’s episode of Reframing Perspectives, Dr. Payal Beri sits down with Maddie from Child Free Trust / childfree wealth to talk about what financial planning, aging, and emotional legacy look like when you’re childfree. They unpack the guilt, cultural expectations, and political pressure around choosing not to have kids, and how childfree women can intentionally design both their finances and their future care.

• Why childfree women are statistically among the highest earners—and what that really means for money & freedom
  
  
• The myth that “your children will take care of you” vs. what actually happens in elder care
  
  
• How to think about living legacy vs. after-death legacy (and why dying with millions might mean you over-saved)
  
  
• The emotional layers of being childfree: guilt, judgment, and the constant “who will take care of you?” question
  
  
• Why emotional intelligence, context, and curiosity are crucial when talking to childfree friends & family
  
  
• Practical first steps for childfree folks: building your support team, planning for incapacity, and choosing who makes decisions for you
  
  
• How the childfree community is redefining love, contribution, and legacy beyond parenting
  
  

If you’re childfree, unsure about having kids, or love someone who is, this episode will give you language, clarity, and a lot of relief.

Our Guest: Maddy Roche, Chief Growth Officer

Maddy oversees all marketing, growth, and prospect engagement for Childfree Trust. Maddy was XYPN’s first employee, with roles including VP of Getting Sh!t Done, and hosted XYPN’s podcast, Behind the Advisor.  She’s guided thousands of financial planners throughout their entrepreneurial journeys with energy, expertise, and compassion.

https://childfreetrust.com/

https://www.linkedin.com/in/maddy-roche-25962032/

Connect with Dr. Payal Beri & Reframing Perspectives:

• Instagram – Dr. Payal: https://www.instagram.com/dr.payalberi
  
  
• Subscribe on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@payalberi?sub_confirmation=1
  
  
• RK Empathy: https://www.rkempathy.com
• LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/payalberi
• Speaking & Media: https://www.payalberi.com

“Look at the Indians, look at what they’re doing…”
We’ve all heard some version of this — South Asians framed as the “model minority”: wealthy, high-achieving, and problem-free. But behind the stereotype is a much more complicated reality that deeply affects mental health, identity, and belonging.

In this powerful conversation, Dr. Payal Beri sits down with Dr. Shanta, a psychologist and social impact advocate, to unpack the layers underneath South Asian “success”:

• The pressure to be perfect
• The silence around abuse, depression, and substance use
• Colorism, dating rules, and “no Black, no [insert your own group]”
• White adjacency, colonization, and why so many of us chase proximity to whiteness for safety

They also explore the often-erased stories of Caribbean, African, and working-class South Asians — cab drivers, domestic workers, families living paycheck to paycheck — and how leaving them out of the narrative deepens shame, classism, and disconnection inside our own community.

If you’ve ever felt like you don’t fit the “perfect South Asian family” image, or you’ve struggled to hold your pride in your culture alongside pain, secrecy, or intergenerational trauma — this episode is for you.

🔍 In This Episode, We Talk About:

• What the model minority myth really is and how it harms all communities
• How South Asian “success” is built on selective visibility and class privilege
• Denial around domestic violence, substance use, and mental health in desi families
• Colorism, dating rules, and why “no Black / no [X]” shows up in our homes
• How colonization created a deep craving for white adjacency and external validation
• The erased histories of Caribbean, African, and working-class South Asians
• The illusion of safety in whiteness and the cost of chasing it
• What real solidarity, self-reflection, and collective liberation could look like

This conversation centers South Asians, but the questions apply to every community:
How do we talk honestly about our wounds, privilege, and internalized bias — without losing love for our people?

Connect with Dr. Shanta:
Instagram: @snk_therapy
Website: snktherapy.com

Connect with Dr. Payal Beri & Reframing Perspectives:

• Instagram – Dr. Payal: https://www.instagram.com/dr.payalberi
  
  
• Subscribe on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@payalberi?sub_confirmation=1
  
  
• RK Empathy: https://www.rkempathy.com
• LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/payalberi
• Speaking & Media: https://www.payalberi.com

It took me 43 years to truly trust myself—not just “believe” in myself. In this first Solo Reframe episode, I explore how much we edit, shrink, and perform just to feel included… and what happens when belonging becomes a survival strategy instead of a genuine home.

I share a personal story from a recent trip to India as a third-culture kid, how being constantly measured as “enough” (Indian enough, American enough, successful enough) quietly shaped my identity, and the moment I realized I wasn’t confused—I was layered.

We’ll dive into why self-trust and belonging are deeply linked, how low self-trust makes us outsource our worth (in friendships, family, community, even business), and what changes when we stop waiting to be chosen and start asking: Where am I celebrated, not just tolerated?

I close with a few reflection questions to help you gently notice:
 Where are you still editing yourself to stay included—and what might shift if you trusted that who you are is already enough?

Connect with Dr. Payal Beri & Reframing Perspectives:

• Instagram – Dr. Payal: https://www.instagram.com/dr.payalberi
  
  
• Subscribe on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@payalberi?sub_confirmation=1
  
  
• RK Empathy: https://www.rkempathy.com
• LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/payalberi
• Speaking & Media: https://www.payalberi.com

Who told you that you have to win to be worthy?
In this conversation, we unpack how competition silently shapes our identities, workplaces, and communities – and what it really means to uncompete in a world obsessed with hustle and “survival of the fittest.”

My guest today, Ruchika (author of Inclusion on Purpose and Uncompete), shares how growing up between a hyper-competitive father and an abundantly kind mother shaped her lens on success, scarcity, and belonging. We talk about Singapore’s nation-building story, Darwinism myths, “diversity hire” narratives, burnout, hustle culture, and why so many of us still operate from scarcity even when our basic needs are met.

Ruchika Malhotra- Diversity Inc…

We also explore what younger generations are already doing differently – saying “I’m not opting into this” – and how we can redefine ambition, build more spacious lives, and champion each other without feeling like someone else’s win means our loss.

🔍 In this episode, we explore:

• Why we are taught to compete before we learn how to belong
• Scarcity vs. abundance when you’re worried about rent or your next meal
• The myth of “there’s only space for a few” and the “diversity hire” story
• How competition often rewards conformity, not true talent
• Generational shifts: Gen Z, mental health, and opting out of hustle culture
• Redefining ambition and success beyond 24/7 grind
• Envy as a signal, not a shame – and how to use it wisely
• What it looks like to build careers, companies, and communities around collaboration

Our Guest 

Ruchika — Author, Inclusion & Equity Strategist
Ruchika is the author of Inclusion on Purpose and Uncompete, and a leading voice on equity, inclusion, and reimagining success beyond competition and hustle culture. Her work has been featured in outlets like Harvard Business Review, and she advises leaders and organizations around the world on how to build workplaces rooted in belonging and abundance.

Ruchika Malhotra- Diversity Inc

Key Takeaways

• “Survival of the fittest” is not a life rule – it’s a story we’ve been sold
• Scarcity is often systemic, but many of us still live with a scarcity mindset
• Competition, as it’s set up today, often rewards those who conform to narrow norms
• Younger generations are pushing back on grind culture and always-on work
• Redefining ambition means choosing aligned opportunities, not all opportunities
• Collaboration can bring out more of our potential than competition ever did

💬 If you’ve ever felt like you’re constantly behind, constantly competing, or constantly comparing yourself online, this conversation is for you.

Connect with Ruchika Malhotra:

• Website – https://www.ruchika.co/
  
  
• LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/ruchikatm/
  
  
• Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/rtulshyan/

Connect with Dr. Payal Beri & Reframing Perspectives:

• Instagram – Dr. Payal: https://www.instagram.com/dr.payalberi
  
  
• Subscribe on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@payalberi?sub_confirmation=1
  
  
• RK Empathy: https://www.rkempathy.com
• LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/payalberi
• Speaking & Media: https://www.payalberi.com

Summary

In this reflective episode, Dr.Payal Beri discusses the journey of her podcast, Reframing Perspectives, throughout 2025. She emphasizes the importance of empathy, understanding diverse experiences, and the mission to help listeners reframe their perspectives. As the year comes to a close, she shares insights on personal growth, community engagement, and the exciting changes planned for 2026, including new solo episodes and video content. Dr. Payal Beri encourages listeners to reflect on their learning and continue engaging with the podcast to foster connection and understanding.

Takeaways

The podcast aims to help reframe perspectives.
Understanding diverse experiences fosters empathy and compassion.
Listeners' feedback is crucial for improving episodes.
Reflecting on personal growth is essential during the holiday season.
Revisiting episodes can provide new insights at different life stages.
The podcast will introduce YouTube video content.
Saturday solo reframes will offer personal reflections.
Community and relationships are vital for personal development.
Empathy is key to overcoming societal divides.
Taking pause and reflecting can lead to deeper understanding.

Connect with Dr. Payal Beri & Reframing Perspectives:

• Instagram – Dr. Payal: https://www.instagram.com/dr.payalberi
  
  
• Subscribe on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@payalberi?sub_confirmation=1
  
  
• RK Empathy: https://www.rkempathy.com
• LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/payalberi
• Speaking & Media: https://www.payalberi.com