Relatively Normal

On this week's show, I welcome Licensed Nurse Practitioner, Bret Weigman to the show to speak about the current mental state of the nursing and medical community.  As we all know, we have been going through the COVID-19 pandemic for 3 years and it has taken a toll on everyone.  One group that has been hit the hardest is the medical community and a lot of that has nothing to do with the actual virus.  A lot of the mental toll has to do with misinformation and downright lies by a part of the population who refuse to listen to experts and medical officials.  This has caused numerous nurses and doctors to be assaulted at their jobs and forced to quit a profession that they love because of the trauma and abuse they take on a day to day basis.

I really appreciate the level of care that Bret gives all of his patients regardless of their beliefs because he not only loves his job, but he loves helping people who need his care.  I hope we can all try to be more like him.

So last week, I started a new medication.  I am now taking a daily prescribed dose of Adderall each day for my ADHD, or attention deficit hyperactivity disorder.  I had been going back and forth for a long time on when I should broach the subject with my doctor.  After having honest conversations with multiple therapists, I took the plunge.  

I can't think of a better way to explore this new journey in my life other than bringing Dr. Joseph Elfar back to the show to discuss all things ADHD.  He is currently a resident psychiatrist working in the New Jersey area. He is recently married and about to start his 3rd year of residency. 

Did you know about 6.1 million children in the United States (9.4 percent) between ages 2 to 17 are estimated to have ever been diagnosed with attention deficit hyperactivity disorder? And, the worldwide prevalence of adult ADHD is estimated at 2.8 percent, according to a 2016 study.  To be totally honest, I really did not know that much about this medical condition so I wanted to ask a psychiatrist about it - so that's what I am doing.

If you've ever had any questions about ADHD, the symptoms, and some treatment options, Dr. Elfar will answer a few.

Disclaimer: This show is just for educational purposes.  If you have specific questions about any medical conditions, please consult with your personal doctor or a licensed therapist. 

Happy MLK day to all of you.  Dr. King was an amazing man that taught love and peace while trying to move civil rights forward for so many less fortunate people in this country.  Unfortunately, many of his teachings have not been followed, especially in corporate America.  So many companies will post quotes from the late Civil Rights activist, but their moneys and actions will not follow in the same footsteps.  This needs to change.

On this week's show, I welcome Quila Pugh to speak on these specific topics.  Quila and I met a few months ago after she organized a great discussion about Native Americans and I was immediately hooked on her message and perseverance.  On this show, we discuss the empty promises of some of the larger companies in America that see diversity and inclusion as a nice thing to put in a posting but not really worth throwing effort into. We talk about how this affects her and others that look and feel like her.

I can honestly say this was one of my favorite discussions since starting this show.  Quila is not only accurate in her descriptions but also passionate and we could all learn a lot from her. 

What is one thing that most humans do (multiple times), it gives us a lot of pleasure, some pain, can make or break relationships, and we talk about it the least? SEX.  You know: Good, ole' fashion love makin', coitus, canoodling, intercourse, banging, so on and so forth.  For an action that has so  many words to describe it, we talk about it the least.  

Well, this is where Marital and Family Therapist, Parisa Frost comes in.  Parisa has worked both internationally and domestically in Buenos Aires and Los Angeles to assist couples and individuals with bringing greater understanding into their identities, past traumas, relationships, and sexual issues using creativity, clarity, and cultural humility. 

Parisa was nice enough to be a guest on the show and talk about topics ranging from gaining that spark back in the bedroom to dealing with past sexual trauma.  She uses her platform to make the conversation about sex and sexual function more mainstream and acceptable.  We had a great discussion.

On this week's show, I welcome my good friend and colleague, Lawton Swann, back to the show.  Lawton is the host and creator of Clemson Sports Talk.  This week we discuss the mental aspect of playing sports at the highest levels.  Being in the media, Lawton gets to interact with college athletes and coaches in a unique way.  He sees things that others really don't.  Lawton shares his insights on how the pandemic has changed sports over the last 20 months, how coaches have started to focus on the mental health of their athletes and how a coaches job should be focused on more than just wins and losses.

It is always a pleasure talking with Lawton.  He is very insightful and does his homework.  Go check out his show and follow his journey at clemsonsportstalk.com

To all of us trying to start something new, it can be a frustrating process.  All the emotions and feelings running through our minds can be so rough that we may just decide not to start.  On this week's show, I talk to my good friend and fellow Clemson Alum, Bryan Williams about those specific things.  As long as I've known Bryan, there have been 2 things that have been quite evident - he was a humble human being and he LOVES music.  That is why over a year ago, he started thaempireradio.com to bring the best of old school hip-hop and r&b to every computer and smartphone in the world.  

Bryan, who is a former Clemson Track and Field athlete,  and I take this time to talk about his frustrations of starting something he loves and uses the perfect racing analogy of being on the starting line and either deciding to run or not.  I think you will get a lot out of our discussion and remember, if you are wanting to start something new in your life, boil your decision down to the only 2 choices you really have: you can either run or not.

Did you know that November is Men's Health Awareness month? So what better way to celebrate and support this cause than to invite my good friend and colleague, Jon Hefflebower, to discuss his progression to better himself mentally and physically.

You can hear Jon's own show here: https://open.spotify.com/show/2yeWWqSwFSo0K0EriMzjFb?si=IfzdFnlESFKtaRW4fBARdA

Having and learning empathy can be hard enough but what do we do when we have empathy for some but not for others? For many of us, it is easy to have empathy for people that look like us but not as easy for other groups.  Is this a bad thing? Not necessarily, but being in denial about it may be a bad thing. In this episode, I talk about how we can notice this tendency in our everyday life and work to make it a little bit better.  I do not, and I repeat, I DO NOT want anyone to feel bad about how they think and feel, I just want us all the try everyday to be better versions of ourselves.  

How many times in your life did you try to convince yourself not to be happy. Probably never. But on the other hand, how many times have we tried to force ourselves to be happy if we're feeling sad and depressed? Why do we do this? We put on this tough exterior and try to say over and over again it's OK just be happy and these feeling will go away. But here's the honest truth: when we hide our feelings, when we mask our emotions, we do more harm than good. We can become distant, we can strain relationships and we can even create more issues and more anxiety than we had before. In this week's episode, I talk about how to be real with ourselves and why we should always validate our feelings and help others validate their own.  

A great reference for this show can be found at https://www.powerofpositivity.com/hide-feelings-happen/

We all care about what others think of us.  But when does this start to affect our mental health?  Don't get me wrong, knowing what others think of us is a good personal barometer of how we live our lives; however, it should not be the sole reason why we do the things we do or act a certain way.  In this episode, I suggest that you ask yourself 2 questions when thinking about the opinions that others have of you:

1. Why does this person's opinion of me matter so much, 

and

2.  Does my opinion of myself matter more than theirs?

I believe, if we have honest conversations with ourselves and answer those questions, then we can finally start the journey we need to go on so we can learn to cope with our feelings and protect our own mental health.