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Getting Relationship Help from our Panel of Experts - Top 5 Questions Every Couple is Asking
“In relationships, we bid for emotional connection by asking questions that range from mundane to soul-searching,” says Don Cole, a Houston-based licensed marriage and family therapist certified by the Gottman Institute. But we were socialized to communicate differently: Women make emotional connections with their girlfriends (How do you feel about it?) much different than men do with their pals (Did you see that motorcycle?). When her question strikes a nerve, it’s often because you’re perceiving a disconnect in what she really wants to say—and that can come from both sides, says Cole.
But why can her questions rile you up so easily? Your instinct to blow a gasket or storm off is biological: “Men’s bodies are hardwired to be hyper-reactive to stress and danger, but modern danger is no longer a ferocious tiger—it’s the pissed-off wife or girlfriend,” says Jamie Turndorf, Ph.D., author of Kiss Your Fights Goodbye. When she comes at you with touchy topics, your body sees danger, which involuntarily triggers your fight-or-flight response, she explains. To sail smoothly through any line of questioning, be ready with these smart responses.
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How does an average citizen make an impact on politics? Getting involved can seem daunting, but by following the below steps to engage, and utilizing the many resources out there, you can be on your way to being a political influence. Staying informed, identifying your elected officials, communicating with officials, especially through calls and attending town halls, and writing public comments are all ways to make your voice heard!
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The power of intention setting rituals for your life
There are all types of rituals. Simply defined, a ritual is just a series of actions you perform in a specific order. Rituals are often ceremonious by the way they include specific items, are performed in specific settings, and often occur at specific times.
Clear intention setting is similar to goal setting. As long as your intentions are meaningful to you, feel right for your life, and help you achieve what you set out to, then setting clear intentions can be a powerful practice.
Putting the two together, rituals and intention setting, you can create a meaningful practice of setting your intentions in a beautiful way that has more meaning than just sitting down and writing them on a piece of paper.
What exactly is “intention setting”?
Intention setting is clearly stating what you want to experience and achieve through your actions. This can be related to your work, personal life, dreams, thoughts, mindfulness practice, or whatever you choose. As long as it is clearly defined and customized to your life.
By defining which intentions you want to set, you can work to manifest and bring into reality these intentions. Your thoughts, actions, beliefs, emotions are all used to help you manifest or achieve your intentions.
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We all have times when we lack confidence and do not feel good about ourselves.
But when low self-esteem becomes a long-term problem, it can have a harmful effect on our mental health and our day-to-day lives.
What is self-esteem?
Self-esteem is the opinion we have of ourselves.
When we have healthy self-esteem, we tend to feel positive about ourselves and about life in general. It makes us better able to deal with life's ups and downs.
When our self-esteem is low, we tend to see ourselves and our life in a more negative and critical light. We also feel less able to take on the challenges that life throws at us.
What causes low self-esteem?
Low self-esteem often begins in childhood. Our teachers, friends, siblings, parents, and even the media send us positive and negative messages about ourselves.
For some reason, the message that you are not good enough is the one that stays with you.
Perhaps you found it difficult to live up to other people's expectations of you, or to your own expectations.
Stress and difficult life events, such as serious illness or a bereavement, can have a negative effect on self-esteem.
Personality can also play a part. Some people are just more prone to negative thinking, while others set impossibly high standards for themselves.
How does low self-esteem affect us?
If you have low self-esteem or confidence, you may hide yourself away from social situations, stop trying new things, and avoid things you find challenging.
In the short term, avoiding challenging and difficult situations might make you feel safe.
In the longer term, this can backfire because it reinforces your underlying doubts and fears. It teaches you the unhelpful rule that the only way to cope is by avoiding things.
Living with low self-esteem can harm your mental health and lead to problems such as depression and anxiety.
You may also develop unhelpful habits, such as smoking and drinking too much, as a way of coping.
How to have healthy self-esteem
To boost your self-esteem, you need to
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When we learned that the so-called "baby "carrots are actually shaved down carrots sold as the cores – and that the skin, which has the most beta-carotene in it, has been removed – we began to reach for the hairy, organic-looking bunch of ugly, dirty, unwashed carrots. That's because according to one expert we spoke with when it comes to getting the most beta-carotene from your carrots, the skin is where it's at.
Even just shaving the outer skin off your carrots removes the most nutrient-dense part of the root vegetable, says Dr. Amy Sapola, Director of Health and Wellness at the Chefs Garden, a regenerative family farm in Ohio that grows and sells vegetables to restaurants and home cooks. Eat the skin, dirty spots, and all – since you'll also be getting minerals, beta-carotene, and other phytonutrients the carrot generates to stave off damage from the elements.
Dr. Sapola has made it her life's work to get the most out of every bite of vegetables, starting with the soil they are grown in – and the regenerative way of farming with cover crops and organic fertilizer enhances the minerals in the soil, which means your vegetables deliver more antioxidants and goodness. to give you more energy from your food – to the way that vegetables are stored, cooked, prepped, and ultimately served. No surprise, fresh is best.
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12 Habits of Super-Healthy People
Researchers from the Harvard T.H. Chan School of Public Health looked at data from more than 73,000 women enrolled in the Nurses’ Health Study (NHS) who were followed for 34 years, and more than 38,000 men enrolled in the Health Professionals Follow-up Study (HPFS) who were followed for 28 years.
In a previous study using the same data, these researchers had found that five low-risk lifestyle habits are critical for a longer life expectancy. The more of these habits people had, the longer they lived. The habits were:
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The Top 5 Things searched on Google for 'Benefits of...'
When you’re not at your healthiest, you can probably tell. You may simply feel “off.” You may find that you feel tired, your digestive system isn’t functioning as well as it normally does, and you seem to catch colds. Mentally, you may find you can’t concentrate and feel anxious or depressed.
The good news: a healthy lifestyle can help you feel better. Even better, you don’t have to overhaul your entire life overnight. It’s pretty easy to make a couple of small changes that can steer you in the direction of improved well-being. And once you make one change, that success can motivate you to continue to make more positive shifts.
Ask 50 people to define what a “healthy lifestyle” is, and you’ll likely get 50 different answers. That’s because there’s no one way to be healthy. A healthy lifestyle simply means doing things that make you happy and feel good.
For one person, that may mean walking a mile five times a week, eating fast food once a week, and spending virtual or in-person time with loved ones every other day. For someone else, a healthy lifestyle may be training and running two marathons a year, following a keto diet, and never having a sip of alcohol.
Neither of these is better than the other. Both are perfect for that person. You get to decide what your healthy lifestyle looks like.
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How to switch to a more positive perception of life
There are two types of people in this world: those who view the glass as half-full, and those who see the glass as half-empty. This phenomenon is called perception, and our perceptions profoundly impact how we experience life.
"Perception molds, shapes, and influences our experience of our personal reality,” says Linda Humphreys, PhD, a psychologist and life, relationship, and spirituality coach. “Perception is merely a lens or mindset from which we view people, events, and things.”
In other words, we believe what we perceive to be accurate, and we create our own realities based on those perceptions. And although our perceptions feel very real, that doesn’t mean they’re necessarily factual.
Dr. Humphreys says that our past experiences greatly influence how we decode things. Certain people, things, and situations can trigger you to interpret things through a positive or negative lens based on those past experiences.
If you’re the type that leans more toward the glass-half-empty perspective, don’t worry. Although it does require some work, your perception is something you can change because we choose how we see things. That power is in your hands (er, mind).
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About one in five Americans drinks diet soda every day, according to the CDC. Is that a good thing?
Numerous studies over the past several years have reported links between diet soda and weight gain, diabetes, heart problems, and other health issues. Most recently, headlines sounded alarms about a higher chance of dementia and stroke among diet soda drinkers .
That may sound worrisome, but experts say you don’t need to clear the diet drinks out of your fridge just yet. Many questions must be answered before we’ll know whether diet soda raises your chance of health problems.
Diet Soda, Dementia and Stroke
Boston University researcher Matthew Pase, PhD, and colleagues examined 10 years of health information from nearly 3,000 American adults over 45 to count the number who had a stroke. They did the same for nearly 1,500 American adults over 60 to determine how many developed dementia.
After accounting for a variety of things that could influence their health, such as age, physical activity, and waist size, the researchers found that diet soda drinkers nearly tripled their odds of stroke and dementia, compared with those who drank no diet soda.
Scary, right? Not necessarily, says Pase. Only 81, or 5%, of the people in the study were diagnosed with dementia, and only 97, or 3%, had a stroke.
“At the end of the day, we’re talking about small numbers of people,” says Pase. “I don’t think that people should be alarmed.”
Pase also makes clear that his study’s results, published in April in the journal Stroke, don’t explain the link. Do diet sodas cause health problems like stroke and dementia? Or do people who have higher chances of getting such health problems choose to drink diet soda, perhaps to try to cut sugar and calories in their diets? Pase can’t say.
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