Riverdale or Not Riverdale

Tom and Savi's love of Riverdale is truly tested when they watch one of the worst episodes of Riverdale they have ever seen. Seriously. One. Of. The. Worst. Ever. Say hello to some classic Riverdalians in this episode - Governor Dooley, who we all definitely remember definitely, as well as Darla and Dodger Dickinson who everyone remembers immediately always. Savi is sad about the sudden Reggie backstory that throws his hijinks with Hiram into question, and Tom is rethinking everything including his dedication to the Riverdale franchise. 

Music by Brendan Byrnes (www.brendanbyrnes.com).
Art by Eleni Koumi (@loukoumh on Instagram).

The trailer for the second half of season five is out and Tom and Savi have a lot to say! Get ready for new romances, old villains, and an alien mystery (fingers crossed)... Tom hopes to see  Tabitha and Jughead get the happiness and romance they deserve, and Savi dreams of Hiram and Reggie hijinks again. Some fan favourites return this season and Savi and Tom cling to the fantasy of a KKC (Katy Keene Crossover).

Possible Fast and Furious 9 spoilers from 17:25 to 19:05.

Music by Brendan Byrnes (www.brendanbyrnes.com).
Art by Eleni Koumi (@loukoumh on Instagram).

Riverdale has fully lost the plot and Tom and Savi couldn't be more unhappy. This episode brings a prison break, a magic mushroom trip gone wrong, a magical prayer, and a beloved Riverdale family held hostage - and that's not all! Riverdale insists on doing entirely too much this episode and yet none of their antics include spending more time with sweethearts Tabitha and dear Jughead - much to Tom's deep, deep devastation. Savi is excitedly awaiting the show's three month mid-season hiatus, and Tom finds himself wishing for the precious Katy Keene crossover that will never come... 

Music by Brendan Byrnes (www.brendanbyrnes.com).
Art by Eleni Koumi (@loukoumh on Instagram).

Savi and Tom are brought great pain to talk about Riverdale this week - they'll talk about nearly anything else. Tom's episode assessment is in - Riverdale season five episode nine, ya BORING! The gang continue their alien, football, and murder mystery shenanigans... and also Veronica is still there for some reason. Savi must say goodbye to the goofy, surprisingly loveable Reggie/Hiram friendship, and Tom is still disappointed at the lack of Tabitha/Jughead smooching. The alien storyline is abandoned and Savi and Tom mourn what could have been. Goodbye aliens, we loved you.

Content warning for discussions of domestic violence and homophobia.

Music by Brendan Byrnes (www.brendanbyrnes.com).
Art by Eleni Koumi (@loukoumh on Instagram).

Savi and Tom are not happy. Spoiler warning, this is a Riverdale episode. All the things Savi and Tom love come crashing down around them; Jughead's alien experience is thrown into question, non-monogamy is mentioned and then subsequently ignored, and most dastardly of all, the return of Riverdale queer-baiting. It leaves our two podcasters with one and only one demand; #Justice4Reggie.

Content warning for discussions of PTSD, trauma, alcoholism.

Music by Brendan Byrnes (www.brendanbyrnes.com).
Art by Eleni Koumi (@loukoumh on Instagram).

In this episode, Tom and Savi are stumped as to where episode 7 falls on the RONR scale. On the one hand, they have Veronica and Archie exploiting children, Betty still pretending to be an FBI agent, and a dance battle... on the other hand they have, aliens?! Savi is confused about the function of war in Riverdale's storytelling, while Tom unleashes a Marxist tirade about how they maybe shouldn't actually make kids pick up rubbish as punishment when a certain someone has funds enough to bring back the town's garbage collectors (cough Veronica cough). 


Content warning for discussions of homelessness, PTSD, and the sexualisation of teens.

Music by Brendan Byrnes (www.brendanbyrnes.com).
Art by Eleni Koumi (@loukoumh on Instagram).

Archie's RROTC responsibilities are temporarily side-barred as he tries to reestablish the Bulldogs football team; Jughead, to Savi and Tom's surprise, turns out to be a pretty bad teacher; Betty can't shed her Black Hood association; and Veronica... is the new admiree of the high school boys? Yeah... Sidenote: RIP to Reggie's beautiful mullet. Side Sidenote: Hiram and Reggie are new best buds and Tom and Savi are here for it. 

Mild Emperor's New Groove spoilers between 8:50-9:30.

Content warning for abuse, pedophilia, suicide, self harm, and homophobia.

Music by Brendan Byrnes (www.brendanbyrnes.com).
Art by Eleni Koumi (@loukoumh on Instagram).

This week Savi and Tom are thrown a curveball - an actually good episode? They discuss how the show can possibly be THIS inconsistent and bounce back from being utter trash. Jughead's gotta write a book, Betty's figuring out how to be a good sister, Archie is continuing his Save Riverdale campaign, and Veronica deals with more family drama. If you came for fun seven year reunions, Riverdale's got nothing for you - but it does have a strange fight montage and some very surprising sex... 

Content warning for drugs, abuse.

Music by Brendan Byrnes (www.brendanbyrnes.com).
Art by Eleni Koumi (@loukoumh on Instagram).

Tom and Savi try their best to understand the new and improved Riverdale - it's like a whole new show baby! Archie ended pursuing his sudden dream of being in the army, Betty continued her wacky FBI escapades, Jughead is ducking his new writing responsibilities, and Veronica... is also there. Like everyone else, Tom is confused about the WWII aesthetics surrounding Archie and his army antics and Savi wishes at least ONE person in the show could be happy. 

Content warning for murder, PTSD.

Music by Brendan Byrnes (www.brendanbyrnes.com).
Art by Eleni Koumi (@loukoumh on Instagram).

Tom and Savi are blown away by the complete 180 Riverdale managed to pull off - they made a great episode! Well… Tom calls it ‘palatable’ and Savi calls it ‘great’! You decide. In this episode the gang finally graduate from high school! Goodbye Principal Weatherbee, goodbye musicals, goodbye drama… Unless? The only thing that matters in this episode is the final reveal, forget about everything else - and boy oh boy, what a reveal. Riverdale is back baby!

Music by Brendan Byrnes (www.brendanbyrnes.com).
Art by Eleni Koumi (@loukoumh on Instagram).