Without the guardrails of science to fall back on, the boys deviate from their typicality prudent decision making in favor of deliberately provocative, sensational, and often ridiculous hot takes about a few of their favorite rock ‘n roll bands.

The boys audition several iPads for their upstart rock ‘n roll band, lament the absence of free chicks in their chosen vocation, and use the scientific method to conduct an autopsy on the corpse of Dire Straits’ 1985 MTV smash hit, “Money for Nothing.”

The boys wear spandex to a retirement party, impress Michael Jackson with lame fat jokes, and use the scientific method to conduct an autopsy on the corpse of “Weird Al” Yankovic’s 1988 portly pop parody, “Fat.”

The boys enjoy dial-up internet with Richie Sambora, use racist cosplay and bad dinner theater to fight the inevitable irrelevance of age, and use the scientific method to conduct an autopsy on the corpse of Styx’s 1983 synth-pop sensation, “Mr. Roboto.”

The boys battle middle-age mid-sections, commit political suicide on antenna TV, and use the scientific method to conduct an autopsy on the corpse of Filter’s mid 90’s mid-west industrial metal hit, “Hey Man Nice Shot.”

The boys attempt to mediate a Pink Floyd peace treaty, hire a team of outside writers to stay relevant, and use the scientific method to conduct an autopsy on the corpse of Ozzy’s Grammy winning title track, “Patient Number 9.”

The boys stubbornly refuse to discuss the 2023 Rock Hall nominations, offset cocaine induced hearing loss with reverb, and use the scientific method to conduct an autopsy on the corpse of Prince’s 1984 sex fiend serenade, “Darling Nikki”

The boys offer unsolicited financial advice to rock stars, shame Phil Anselmo into taking an online cultural sensitivity course, and use the scientific method to conduct an autopsy on the corpse of Butthole Surfers’ 1996 slacker rock hit, “Pepper.”

The boys share more bad news, make ridiculously unfounded claims about Dolly Parton, and use the scientific method to conduct an autopsy on the corpse of Rammstein’s 1997 slab of German industrial metal, “Du Hast.”