Rock-n-Roll Autopsy

The boys admire their facial warts, wax philosophic about their sexual prowess, and use the scientific method to conduct an autopsy on the corpse of Motorhead’s 1991 braggadocious blues, “I’m So Bad (Baby I Don’t Care).”

With their over-used lab unfit for pathological dissection the boys put down their scalpels & have an overwrought discussion about over-rehearsed, over-coached, & over-cooked moments in the careers of Dream Theater and AC/DC.

The boys break out the cowbell, drop gratuitous F-bombs, and use the scientific method to conduct an autopsy on the corpse of Rage Against The Machine’s 1992 protest anthem, “Killing In The Name.”

The boys wage a valiant war on diaper rash, age out of angry heavy metal, and use the scientific method to conduct an autopsy on the corpse of Slayer’s 1986 thrash classic, “Angel of Death.”

The boys time travel to the offensive 80s, get high on catnip, kitty litter, and coke, and use the scientific method to conduct an autopsy on the corpse of Steel Panther’s brand new 2022 raunchy rocker, “Never Too Late (To Get Some Pu**y Tonight).”

The boys suffer through an angry, awkward puberty, write nerdy poetry about lycanthropes, and use the scientific method to conduct an autopsy on the corpse of Samhain’s 1984 goth punk rocker, “The Howl.”

The boys lament the implications of tiny hands, get loaded on childhood swigs of Dad’s vintage beer, and use the scientific method to conduct an autopsy on the corpse of Alice Cooper’s 1975 shock rock classic, “Cold Ethyl.”

The boys do mountains of blow w/ Stephen King, struggle to close Jimi Hendrix’s casket, and use the scientific method to conduct an autopsy on the corpse of the Ramones’ 1989 radio hit, “Pet Sematary.”

The boys sing hooky hymns about human sacrifice, practice satanism, songcraft, and silliness, and attempt to rank the catalogue of Swedish occult rockers, Ghost.

The boys replace their drum heads with pie filling, write elevator music for record execs, and use the scientific method to conduct an autopsy on the corpse of Warrant’s 1990 hair metal anthem, “Cherry Pie.”