Grab your espresso and buckle in, babe, because this is not your average Kardashian convo.
In this fully unfiltered spiral, I, Zenobia Darling, kick things off with a hot take on the Blue Origin PR space flight featuring Katy Perry, Gayle King, a front-row Kris & Khloe moment, and a crying Oprah. Inspiration? Or rich-girl cosplay in zero gravity? You already know what I think.
Then, in a cosmic pivot, I drop a haunted update from Ethereal Anarchy: Zenobia Darlingâs Haunted Revolution before launching into a deep, delusional, and delicious dive into the Kardashian Dynastyâfrom Keeping Up on E! to their fourth-wall-breaking Hulu-era rebrand.
I unpack my personal journey with the show, its connections to The Real Housewives, and how the Kardashians became a surgically enhanced, heavily filtered love letter to branding, capitalism, and aspirational living.
⨠Khloeâs my ride-or-die fave (yes, I said it)
đź Kim is that girlâa marketing mogul, a media magician, and the Elizabeth Taylor of our generation (fight me)
đââď¸ Kim's dark-to-blonde-to-dark-again hair crimes? As a hairstylist, itâs emotional abuse with extensions
đ¤ Kanye? We go inâitâs a read, a reckoning, and a reality check
đ Caitlynâs public transition vs. her public behaviorâbeing trans doesnât automatically make you kind or evolved
đ Kourtneyâs wellness witchery, Robâs vanishing act, Scottâs redemption arc (I kinda like him), Kendallâs flatline modeling era, Kylieâs influencer empress reign, and yes, the Blac Chyna of it all
đ And baby, North West is coming. That child is a generational talent, a chaotic icon in the making, and we all need to buckle the hell up because Iâm living for her world domination tour
Itâs unhinged, unholy, unapologetically deepâand I love every second of it. The Kardashians arenât just a family⌠theyâre an American mythos in full glam.
Letâs sip the truth. âđ
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#RockStarLife: Coffee Break is in orbit while I finish my hairstyling apprenticeship, darlings. Season Three crash-lands in 2026âfully evolved, over-teased, and glamorously unhinged.
Until touchdown, expect rogue Espresso Shots fired straight from the cosmic voidâno schedule, no permission, just caffeine and beautiful chaos.
Transmission scrambled. Power surging.
Stay loud. ââĄđ˝