Schlock Tactics

Join us as we review one of the most infamous bad movies ever made, and it's strangely lesser known predecessor. We'll explain how Harry Potter made his real film debut, how dentists and mental patients ended up being cast and how vegetarians ended up inspiring some of the schlockiest creatures in cinema history.

Who will be crowned the goblin king?

Join us as we review 2 of the lamest entries in the 65 years of Godzilla movies with Son of Godzilla (1967) and Godzilla (1998). We'll explain how exactly Godzilla was able to procreate on his own and also how Roland Emmerich managed to make a Godzilla film without including the titular character.

Who will be crowned king of the bad movie monsters?

Join us as we revisit 3 of the most berzerk b movies of the 80s with Lifeforce (1985), Invaders from Mars (1986) and The Texas Chainsaw Massacre (1986). Find out how horror legend Tobe Hooper was contracted to direct this insane trio of movies by infamous schlockers Cannon films as we attempt to figure out what the hell was going on in any of these films.

Which Hooper/Cannon collab will come out on top?

Join us as we review 2 of the goofiest, most brainless comedies of the 90s featuring the Weasel himself, Pauly Shore, with Son in Law (1993) and Bio-Dome (1996). We'll explain how exactly Shore came to find himself in these movies, how everybody else was convinced to do them and attempt to translate, at least some small part, of Pauly's unique lingo.

 

Which movie will be recognised as a truly shore thing?

Join us as we review two of the more infamous adaptations of H.G Wells books The Island of Dr Moreau (1996) and The Time Machine (2002). Well break down how exactly these movies got the books so wrong and go into all the legendary behind the scenes gossip as well.

Which Wells adaptation will stand tall?

Join us as we give our thoughts on all 5 worst picture nominees for the Razzies 2019 Winchester, Robin Hood, The Happytime Murders, Holmes & Watson and Gotti. We'll give you the background on how all these films wound up being nominated, whether they're really that bad and give our bold predictions on which films will win big at the Razzies Ceremony.

Which Turkey will go home with the gold?

Join us as we review two of the most infamous performances by the mighty Nicolas Cage with Vampire's Kiss (1988) and The Wicker Man (2006). We'll break down the freakouts, hallucinations and endless Bee references and aim to answer the age old philosophical question...is Nicolas Cage a good actor (in these 2 films).

Who will prevail in the rage in the Cage?

Join us for our festive special as the worlds of pro wrestling and Christmas movies collide with Santa with Muscles (1996) and Santa's Slay (2005). We'll explain how wrestling superstars Hulk Hogan and Bill Goldberg ended up in some of the worst and most bizarre xmas films ever made, and break down both of these unique interpretations of the Santa Claus character. 

Which Santa suplex machine will win this bout?

Join us as we review 2 of the most ludicrous entries into the Bond franchise with Moonraker (1979) and Die Another Day (2002). Find out how James Bond ended up in space in the most expensive bond film ever and how Die Another Day almost ended the Bond franchise, Halle Berry's life and earned Madonna a very unique award. 

Which Bond will live to die another day?

Join us as we review 2 of the most remarkable Turkish mockbusters in the form of The Man who saves the World (aka Turkish Star Wars) and Rampage (aka Turkish Rambo). We'll reveal just how this films were able to shamelessly rip off their American originals, including use of actual footage, and write their name into Turkish cinematic history. 

Which copyright calamity will prevail?