School of Schlock

Special guest Brian joins Tom and Ryan to talk about another 1970s horror cheese-fest that includes Sam Elliott, miscellaneous amphibians, and a whole lot of clumsy deaths. The discussion naturally veers to such topics as the coloration of film credits, largemouth bass making dolphin noises, and Ted, the failed creature wrangler. Nothing will get in the way of your special day if you listen in to our review of Frogs!

Episode Time Stamps 0:05:00 - Film Summary 0:41:03 - Film Background 1:02:20 - The Good

1:11:38 - The Bad

1:22:55 - The Ugly 1:34:40 - Improving the Film

Special guest Lacey joins Tom and Ryan to discuss an early 60s beach-party horror musical that's somewhat lacking in beaches, music, or horror. Along the way they try to determine what words are okay to use on the Internet, whether fish-creatures qualify as zombies, and what needs to happen to turn Eulabelle into the greatest film protagonist of all time. Join us as we zombie stomp our way through The Horror of Party Beach! Don't forget the sodium! (Also guest starring Sammy Terry.) Episode Time Stamps 0:02:30 - Film Summary 0:28:43 - Film Background 0:47:30 - The Good 0:58:05 - The Bad 1:14:32 - The Ugly 1:33:40 - Improving the Film

Special guest Claude joins us for an XL-sized episode that's chock-full of talk about a weird, Lynchian zombie film from the 1970s. Along the way we tackle such important questions as: When will video games stop using audio diaries? What do you do if you're being watched by Lee Harvey Oswald? Is Howard the Duck a scarier horror movie than this film? And is it okay to knit while going to the theater? All of this, plus so much more in our rundown of Messiah of Evil! We may be ugly old men, but we're harmless! Episode Time Stamps 0:06:45 - Film Summary 1:11:55 - Film Background 1:38:00 - The Good, The Bad, The Ugly, and More 2:08:15 - Improving the Film

Special guest Raven joins us from Fantom Comics in D.C. to talk about a movie that misses the mark when it comes to blockbuster superhero action. Listen in as we talk about car theft, diners that house secret bases, and a President willing to kick some ass in the name of environmentalism. Raven also helps us try to reconcile this film's plot with the actual backstory of the comic book characters it depicts. If you're wondering "do they succeed?" my answer is: Is the Red Skull Italian? Find out in our discussion of the 1990 cheesefest, Captain America! Episode Time Stamps 0:04:46 - Film Summary 0:44:10 - Film Background 1:00:40 - The Good 1:11:20 - The Bad 1:28:55 - The Ugly 1:44:55 - Improving the Film

Special guest Spencer joins us from "High and Low: A Kurosawa Podcast" to discuss what is most assuredly NOT a Kurosawa film: a cheaply made chopsocky kung fu film from Taiwan. Join us as we answer the most pressing questions about this movie, such as: which costumes would RuPaul wear? Does the film meet the criteria for Six Degrees of Wu-Tang? And is this all really an allegory for a Chinese restaurant in Arizona? Don't wait nineteen years to find out! Listen to our review of Return of the Kung Fu Dragon! Episode Time Stamps 0:05:48 - Film Summary 0:40:29 - Film Background 0:48:43 - The Good 1:00:10 - The Bad 1:16:06 - The Ugly 1:26:29 - Improving the Film

The Master would approve of this very special one year anniversary episode as Tom and Ryan tackle a cult classic and one of the worst films of all time, Manos: The Hands of Fate! Come listen to the story of how Manos came to be and find out exactly why this film is so terrible in every regard. Our one piece of advice? Never make a bet with a fertilizer salesman. Episode Time Stamps 0:05:04 - Film Summary 0:21:20 - Film Background 0:50:12 - The Good 0:53:14 - The Bad 1:06:55 - The Ugly 1:27:00 - Improving the Film

A mirror-wearing monster from the future is on the loose in central Florida! Or at least it is for the last 15 minutes of this 1958 piece of sci-fi dreck. Before that, Tom and Ryan have to sit through reverse-carbon-dating, selfish scientists, air-headed secretaries, peeping toms, and tons of wasted potential in Terror from the Year 5000! At least Tom learns a little something about Avatar: The Last Airbender and how much Ryan loves the M. Night Shyamalan film adaptation. Episode Time Stamps 0:04:35 - Film Summary 0:30:20 - Film Background 0:49:52 - The Good 0:58:14 - The Bad 1:12:06 - The Ugly 1:30:30 - Improving the Film

Who do you call when earthquakes are threatening to destroy the planet? Apparently you call some bland seismologists and a whole bunch of stock footage, if this Fred F. Sears snooze-fest is to be believed. Join Tom and Ryan as they watch a film about falling rocks, women abandoning successful careers to get married, and a whole lot of Element 112. Try to contain your violent reactions as we review The Night the World Exploded! Episode Time Stamps 0:03:50 - Film Summary 0:24:44 - Film Background 0:41:51 - The Good 0:53:30 - The Bad 1:06:38 - The Ugly 1:20:00 - Improving the Film

The name "Sidney Pink" elicits reactions from nearly everyone; those reactions usually include "Huh?" "Who's that?" and "What are you talking about?" That's why we're on the second film in our Sidney Pink block: Journey to the Seventh Planet! Come listen to Tom and Ryan discuss one-eyed ferrets, imaginary women (and the men who love them), and of course petty, sentient brain-creatures! Join us and I'm sure you'll agree: we'll find our love somewhere beyond the seventh planet. Episode Time Stamps 0:03:17 - Film Summary 0:25:31 - Film Background 0:40:02 - The Good 0:44:28 - The Bad 1:00:15 - The Ugly 1:15:05 - Improving the Film

Icons of Danish culture include Hamlet, Hans Christian Andersen, and Soren Kierkegaard. Well finally, Tom and Ryan are happy to welcome a giant prehistoric reptile to the ranks of Danish superstardom in a 1960s monster movie that comes straight from Scandinavia! Thrill as they discuss Danish amusement parks, Dustin Hoffman, aimless scientific experiments, and the worst example of farmer-eating ever! Whether you're taking in the film, the new MST3K episode, or the smutty novelization, you're sure to enjoy Reptilicus! Episode Time Stamps 0:02:47 - Film Summary 0:33:19 - Film Background 0:58:28 - The Good 1:06:24 - The Bad 1:21:26 - The Ugly 1:36:31 - Improving the Film