Most of us know that if you used a third party to help you build your family, or if you are adopting, it is essential to share this with your child. We also know that "early and often" works best for the children and the parents.  Talking to your child early and often helps your child integrate their sense of who they are from the beginning.  It has also been shown to help children have better relationships with their parents and to have a positive impact on their teen years. 

When we practice things, we get better, and sharing with your child how you built your family can feel uncomfortable or even awkward at best.  Practicing your narrative, trying on different versions of your story and getting to a place where you can craft a narrative that feels like it suits your family is an important process. Practicing that story will help you get the kinks out and help your child feel more comfortable with their story as well.  By the time it becomes natural for you to tell it, your child will begin to hear the story, or even just pick up words or phrases and those words will feel natural. This in turn can help your child feel like their story is a good story, and their story is simply the way you created your family.

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