Konnected Minds Podcast

Segment: Marriage Isn't Competition, It's a Winning Team


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From the dangerous mindset that women initiate divorces because they get in there and discover comfort is not just about money to the revolutionary truth that they want time, attention, affection, and a number of things beyond financial provision, and why the brutal truth about why divorces skyrocket is that men don't understand that male and female are wired differently so even when the provision is needed and appreciated, if you do not want to become a victim you've got to come up with a shared vision of what kind of family do we want to be, what kind of legacy do we want to create, what kind of inheritance do we want to give our children, are we going to raise survivors or dynasties, the deep conversations around these areas that make a woman know she's not coming into a situation of unilateral decision making when it comes to finances but based on these parameters and a common shared vision, the realization that divorce will really try to be a thing of the past when communication is prioritized but most times divorce comes as a result of the fact that not much is communicated and you just take what you see without engaging on the modalities that make the person feel a part of it, the brilliant question that takes us back to shared vision: should the woman support the business to allow the family to build a legacy or should she do her own thing, the reality that not many women will come into the life of a man who has clarity with regards to where they are headed as a business wanting to expand and build a dynasty unless you've communicated with your wife, the lunch of information that stops women from joining forces because she stumbled on stories that some woman supported a husband and at the end she was thrown out or the mother was thrown out, the effect of upbringing and what she saw that creates premonitions making her unwilling to support based on antecedents, the slice on the husband to bring her to a place where she understands that whatever produced her good or bad is not what is going to be the outcome of who we are, the balance where the man asks about her dreams and aspirations no matter how small because God never created any junk so he believes she has dreams and can encourage her to do something on the side that will bring the best of her out, the peace that reigns when it's not just the woman coming to support the agenda of the man which is 100% good but seeing a man who is also interested in digging deep into who she is and trying to bring her out so that in supporting him her dreams are not dead, the women who completely ignore the fact that they were supposed to come and support and encourage because they feel left out when limited information comes and they feel a sense of threat that oh my god I don't think I'm a part of what is going on, the wisdom that nobody is really wired a certain way, it's the effect of upbringing, effect of environment, and significant emotional experiences that contribute to who you ultimately have as a support base or as a counterproductive human, the football analogy where there's nothing like competition when we have the winning team but how do you have a winning team when everyone has got their dreams and aspirations, the quality of players where competition is knocked out when two partners come to a place of knowing the quality of their lives, and if they cannot fish it out themselves they pay professional help to bring them to the place where they know, the potential wife that will support you so much but if you do not dig you may not know whether she was raised in a home that was dysfunctional and even though she tries to put up a front there will be triggers that will make her go back to her upbringing and the things she saw which you may not even know,

Guest: Mama Cathy

Host: Derrick Abaitey

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Konnected Minds PodcastBy Derrick Abaitey

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