"I was completely externally focused. Who likes me? Who is accepting me? Who's giving me attention? I did theater. I was on stages. I was very externally focused." - Janis Vogel

Growing up mixed-race on Martha's Vineyard, filmmaker and coach Janis Vogel became a master of reinvention - transforming herself from skater to "homie" to clueless wannabe, all in pursuit of acceptance. But it wasn't until becoming a mother that she realized the cost of living as a canvas instead of a soul.

This raw conversation explores the exhausting work of shapeshifting for love and the profound liberation that comes from choosing authenticity.

🎯 What You'll Learn:

• The hidden cost of people-pleasing and perfectionism
• How childhood abandonment shapes adult relationships
• Why being a "good mother" requires being yourself first
• The difference between seeming okay and actually being okay
• How to break cycles without breaking your family

⚠️ Perfect for: People-pleasers, parents questioning their choices, anyone tired of performing

🎬 About Our Guest: Janis Vogel is a filmmaker, divorce coach, and mother who helps people navigate relationship transitions with authenticity and grace.

Connect with Janis!
instagram.com/janisvogel

A note on ethics, process, and safety: 

• The individuals in this podcast have graciously shared their stories and it's important to note that while these discussions are enriching and enlightening, they are not a substitute for therapy or mental healthcare.
• Please note that each guest has given their consent to participate, had full control over what aspects of their journey were shared, and either currently engages in therapy or has done so in the past.

Thanks from all of us at Sense of Self and The Mission Entertainment.

We made it to the finale of our first season, and it's a really good one. We had the opportunity to do a deep dive into Dr. Seyi Akintorin's journey of self-discovery and transformation. A first-generation Nigerian immigrant and doctor, Seyi shares her powerful story of breaking free from the expectations and pressures placed upon her by her family, society, and herself.

Seyi opens up about the impact of racism on her mental health, the challenges she faced in her surgical residency, and the pivotal moments that led her to make life-altering decisions. She candidly discusses the internal struggles she faced, the feelings of inadequacy, and the realization that she needed to prioritize her own well-being over societal expectations.

As Seyi navigates different phases of her life, from Chicago to Boston to California, she reflects on the importance of finding inner peace and fulfillment beyond external achievements. She shares her journey of rediscovering her true self, embracing her strengths, and letting go of the need for validation from others.

Through Seyi's story, we witness the power of resilience, self-reflection, and the courage to redefine one's sense of self. Join us as we explore Shay's path to self-acceptance, healing, and the pursuit of a life that aligns with her authentic identity.

Thank you for tuning in to Sense of Self. Stay connected for updates on future bonus episodes and the possibility of a second season. Remember, your sense of self is a journey worth exploring!

A note on ethics, process, and safety: 

• The individuals in this podcast have graciously shared their stories and it's important to note that while these discussions are enriching and enlightening, they are not a substitute for therapy or mental healthcare.
• Please note that each guest has given their consent to participate, had full control over what aspects of their journey were shared, and either currently engages in therapy or has done so in the past.

Thanks from all of us at Sense of Self and The Mission Entertainment.

Ria Tobaccowala, a former Google employee turned screenwriter and director. Ria shared her journey of self-discovery, starting from her childhood in Chicago to her experiences as a primary caregiver for a loved one. We delved into how she navigated being an outsider after a traumatic incident in high school involving photography and law enforcement. Ria also discussed her path to rediscovering her passion for storytelling and filmmaking, despite facing challenges and self-doubt. Through therapy, Ria learned to be kinder to herself, embrace the present moment, and trust in the flow of life, much like a soothing waterfall, as her name suggests. The episode highlighted the importance of self-exploration, resilience, and finding peace in one's journey of understanding oneself.

Transitioning from a successful career at Google to becoming a primary caregiver for a loved one, Ria faced life-altering decisions that prompted her to reexamine her priorities and aspirations. Through therapy, she discovered the importance of self-care, self-compassion, and being present in the moment. Ria's journey of self-discovery and resilience serves as a testament to the power of introspection, growth, and embracing one's true identity. As she continues to navigate the waters of life, Ria strives to embody the essence of a waterfall, flowing with grace and trust in the journey ahead.

Join us for the next episode of Sense of Self as we explore more stories of self-discovery and personal growth. Thank you for listening.

A note on ethics, process, and safety: 

• The individuals in this podcast have graciously shared their stories and it's important to note that while these discussions are enriching and enlightening, they are not a substitute for therapy or mental healthcare.
• Please note that each guest has given their consent to participate, had full control over what aspects of their journey were shared, and either currently engages in therapy or has done so in the past.

Thanks from all of us at Sense of Self and The Mission Entertainment.

Cierra Glaude, also known as “Shooter,” Cierra is an accomplished director and filmmaker from Mobile, Alabama. She initiated her career under the guidance of Ava DuVernay, beginning with a role on the film Selma. Cierra’s passion for filmmaking ignited during her tenure at the University of Alabama, where she was instrumental in launching the Black Warrior Film Festival, an experience that paved her path to meeting DuVernay.

Her directorial journey includes four episodes of the series Queen Sugar, where she evolved from a production assistant to a director. Cierra’s directorial acumen extends to other notable TV series such as Power Book IV, BMF, Riverdale, and several others. Her work is marked by a commitment to diverse representation, particularly for people of color, women, and the LGBTQ community. She directed the poignant short film Last Looks, which was showcased at the Urbanworld Film Festival and later featured in Issa Rae’s “#ShortFilmSundays” series on YouTube.

Cierra’s approach to filmmaking is deeply communal and collaborative, often emphasizing the importance of creating films with friends and nurturing relationships on set. She believes in a servant spirit in directing, focusing on serving the story and those who help bring it to life. Her career is characterized by a strong work ethic, personal connection, and joy.

Shooter shared the profound impact of her brother's passing and the challenges she faced in coping with grief and loss. She opened up about her family dynamics, particularly her sometimes fraught relationship with her father and the responsibilities she has taken on as the eldest daughter, and setting personal boundaries. Shooter was candid about her need to protect herself, and the bifurcated self she has constructed—she is "Cierra" in certain situations, and "Shooter" in others. Shooter's remarkable resilience and determination shine brightly, as does her ability to find humor and wisdom in challenging circumstances.

Thank you for listening to Cierra's story, and for being a part of our community. Tune in next week for episode 4 of season 1, and please subscribe.

You can learn more about us at www.senseofselfpod.com and follow us for updates on  Instagram at https://www.instagram.com/sense.of.self.pod/.

A note on ethics, process, and safety: 

• The individuals in this podcast have graciously shared their stories and it's important to note that while these discussions are enriching and enlightening, they are not a substitute for therapy or mental healthcare.
• Please note that each guest has given their consent to participate, had full control over what aspects of their journey were shared, and either currently engages in therapy or has done so in the past.

Thanks from all of us at Sense of Self and The Mission Entertainment.

Joy Melody Woods Bennett, Ph.D. is a scholar and strategist in interpersonal communication that empowers brands, organizations, athletes, and creatives of color to cultivate impactful cultural capital. Outside of work, she dedicates her time and expertise to advocating for Black women and reproductive health. Through speaking engagements at conferences, consultancy work for various organizations, and serving on nonprofit boards focused on addressing health disparities, she strives to make a positive impact in this critical area.

The episode delves into Dr. Woods Bennett's struggles with undiagnosed learning disabilities and the impact they had on her academic journey. She candidly discusses the challenges she faced in school, the pressure to excel, and the revelation of her learning disabilities later in life, which provided clarity but also raised questions about her perception of her intelligence and identity.

Dr. Woods Bennett also shared her experiences with mental health struggles, including being diagnosed with bipolar II disorder, and spoke openly about the impact of these diagnoses one her life her career, and how she viewed her younger self.

Despite challenges she is determined to make a positive impact and help others. She describes herself as a sponge,  eager to learn and grow, and inspire others to seek help.

Dr. Joy Melody Woods Bennett's story of resilience, honesty, and commitment to self-discovery is deeply moving, and serves as a powerful reminder of the importance of self-acceptance, and seeking support.

Thank you for listening to Joy's story, and for being a part of our community. Tune in next week for episode 3 of season 1, and please subscribe. You can learn more about us at www.senseofselfpod.com and follow us for updates on  Instagram at https://www.instagram.com/sense.of.self.pod/.

You can follow and get in touch with Joy here:

LinkedIn | X | Instagram

She is the founder of Plus TwentyThree

Episode Credits:

Produced by Andrew Coles, Elizabeth Rose, Allison Keeley, and Dr. Gowri Aragam
Edited by: Ben Montoya
Mixed by: Aja Simpson
Music from:  Blue Dot Sessions
Logo, branding, and graphic design by: Melanie Kwan

Sense of Self is a podcast from The Mission Entertainment.

A note on ethics, process, and safety: 

• The individuals in this podcast have graciously shared their stories and it's important to note that while these discussions are enriching and enlightening, they are not a substitute for therapy or mental healthcare.
• Please note that each guest has given their consent to participate, had full control over what aspects of their journey were shared, and either currently engages in therapy or has done so in the past.

Thanks from all of us at Sense of Self and The Mission Entertainment.

Welcome to Sense of Self, a podcast where we explore the stories we tell ourselves about who we are and what happens when those stories stop working. In this episode, I had the privilege of chatting with Akemi Look, a multi-talented actor, producer, and writer based in Los Angeles. Akemi's journey is one of resilience, healing, and self-discovery.

We delved into Akemi's childhood, where she shared her experiences of growing up half-Japanese, half-Chinese in Michigan. She opened up about the challenges she faced, including racial taunts and the struggle to assimilate in a predominantly white community. At the age of 10, Akemi set her sights on becoming a rhythmic gymnast, driven by a deep desire to prove her worth and be accepted as "American enough." She recounted the grueling training regimen, the sacrifices she made, and the pressure she felt to succeed. Akemi's dedication to her sport led her to represent the United States in international competitions, but it came at a cost.

Our conversation took a poignant turn as Akemi shared about a life-altering accident that shattered her face and forced her to confront deep-seated trauma. This event became a turning point in her healing journey, prompting her to slow down, reflect, and prioritize her well-being. Akemi's vulnerability in discussing her struggles with mental health, addiction, and trauma highlighted the importance of self-care and seeking help.

We also explored Akemi's relationship with her family, particularly her journey towards forgiveness and understanding with her parents. The role of friends, her husband, and her own inner strength in supporting her through difficult times was a testament to the power of community and resilience.

As we wrapped up our conversation, Akemi reflected on her growth and transformation, describing herself as a bright, hopeful person ready to shine her light. Her journey from self-doubt to self-acceptance is an inspiring reminder of the healing power of self-discovery.

Thank you for listening to Akemi’s story, and for being a part of our community. Tune in next week for episode 2 of season 1, and please subscribe. You can learn more about us at www.senseofselfpod.com and follow us for updates on  Instagram at https://www.instagram.com/sense.of.self.pod/.

You can check out what Akemi is up to next here:

• www.AkemiLook.com
• http://www.imdb.me/akemilook
• https://www.instagram.com/akemilook

Episode Credits:

Produced by Andrew Coles. Elizabeth Rose. Allison Keeley, and Dr. Gowri Aragam.
Edited by: Ben Montoya
Mixed by: Aja Simpson
Music from:  Blue Dot Sessions
Logo, branding, and graphic design by: Melanie Kwan

Sense of Self is a podcast from The Mission Entertainment. 

A note on ethics, process, and safety: 

• The individuals in this podcast have graciously shared their stories and it's important to note that while these discussions are enriching and enlightening, they are not a substitute for therapy or mental healthcare.
• Please note that each guest has given their consent to participate, had full control over what aspects of their journey were shared, and either currently engages in therapy or has done so in the past.

Thanks from all of us at Sense of Self and The Mission Entertainment.