ShipRecs

Abby's first Star Wars pick is the freaky Reylo force shit we’ve been waiting for. Audrey is torn between love for Reylo and hatred for the sequel trilogy; we are delighted that this story is chock-full of badass women on both the Resistance and First Order sides; and we all marvel at Adam Driver’s glorious hair. 

https://archiveofourown.org/works/5454443/chapters/12608978

Pink Squirrel

Ingredients

• 1 oz crème de noyaux

Combine all ingredients in a cocktail shaker. Add ice and shake until a frost forms on the shaker. Strain into a cocktail glass. Garnish with a cocktail cherry.

Working Girl, a Mandolorian/the Reader fic by FistfulofDollars

https://archiveofourown.org/works/21889465/chapters/52246873

Kylie’s first pick is fluffy, fun Finn/Poe slash. The ladies are a bit salty because the tags promised a Rey/Finn/Poe threesome that never panned out. On the other hand, this story has a ton of hot slash and gives us the deets on birth control and lube in the First Order. On the other other hand, sadly this story suggests that Poe doesn’t stop talking like a t-ball coach, even when you’re going at it. 

Story link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6421978/chapters/14701099

Polyamrous Punch (aka Rum Punch)

This is a drink meant for a group ;) 

Ingredients

• 1 cup of orange juice

Combine all ingredients in a punch bowl or drink dispenser. Add ice and stir to combine. Garnish with cocktail umbrellas and pineapple wedges.

Girls and Boys by Blur 

Forms, a Reylo fic by Trebia

https://archiveofourown.org/works/5454443/chapters/12608978

Last time, Audrey invited Abby and Mira to slap her if they didn’t like Rough Day. Well NO SLAPS WERE DELIVERED because the ladies unanimously love this story’s take on Mando. We suggest the author changes her tag in AO3 from “Favreau forgive me” to “Favreau you’re welcome.” And we introduce a new friend to the group, Kylie! We might finally get some good slash up in here.

Note: Just to explain references to it being 2020 or us having no idea what happens at the end of The Mandalorian Season 2—we recorded this episode in December 2020, trying to get ahead of Mira’s baby. We were unsuccessful. 

Story link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21651097/chapters/51629176

Aviation (aka Shiny Murder Daddy)

Ingredients 

• 2 ounces gin

Combine all ingredients in a cocktail shaker. Add ice and shake until a frost forms on the shaker. Strain into a cocktail glass. Garnish with a cocktail cherry.

Passenger by Deftones feat. Maynard James Keenan

'Till There Was You. (And You), a Rey/Finn/Poe fic  by Fightyourdragon

https://archiveofourown.org/works/6421978/chapters/14701099

Whelp, our “Harry Potter Series” ended up being the “Hermione gets railed” series. And just like Old Testament God, who sent a rainbow to humankind as his promise to never flood the earth again, we give you this rainbow promise to not let the next series become such a total gang-bang. 🌈  Audrey introduces her first Star Wars pick and invites Abby and Mira to slap her in the face if they don’t like it. So stay tuned for The Slappening??? 

Hermione and Snape, Unforced Error

Hermione and Lucius Malfoy museum finger-bang, Epistolary Charms

White Chocolate & Star Anise Martini, Crazy Little Things

Rough Day, a Mandolorian/Reader fic by guardianangelcas!

https://archiveofourown.org/works/21651097/chapters/51629176

In Abby’s latest pick, Draco is a magical creature who sprouts feathers when angry. Is "Big Bird Rage Mode" sexy? And is there any way we can evolve this into a threesome with Daddy Malfoy? 

https://archiveofourown.org/works/14380728/chapters/33204618

Rose Water Gimlet:

• 1/2 oz Rose water

1. Mix all ingredients except club soda with together with ice

Edge of Seventeen by Stevie Nicks

Audrey’s latest Snape/Hermione pick is by far the filthiest thing we have read for the show, and it is glorious.  We drink viscous drinks and are reminded that Abby hates balls. And although this is a Snape fic, Lucius Malfoy comes across pretty well in this story all things considered. Is Desert_Sea the ‘chosen one’ who will write the Snape/Malfoy slashfic that will please both Mira and Audrey?

https://archiveofourown.org/works/9584387/chapters/21667973

Gin Fizz:

• 2 ounces gin

1. Add the gin, lemon juice, lime juice, egg white, cream, sugar, and orange flower water to a cocktail shaker. Shake vigorously, about 15 seconds.

Sexual Healing by Marvin Gaye

Love and Other Misfortunes, a Draco/Hermione fic by senlinyu

https://archiveofourown.org/works/14380728/chapters/33204618

This week, Mira takes another (successful!) crack at selling us on a relationship between Hermione Granger and Lucius Malfoy. This week’s story also has the distinction of having the longest and most thorough Ron-bashing we’ve ever encountered. Let the hate flow through you!

https://archiveofourown.org/works/14742692/chapters/34083581

• Huber’s Spanish Coffee:

1. Run the cut edge of the lemon wedge around the rim of the glass and press the rim into superfine sugar, shaking off the excess 

Letter to Hermione by David Bowie

Sense and Insensibility, A Snape/Hermione fic by Desert_Sea

https://archiveofourown.org/works/9584387/chapters/21667973

Hermione and Luna go to wizard college in Abby’s first pick! This story presents an appealing fantasy of an inclusive wizarding world where Luna and Hermione become globe-trotting partners in work and love, and you can get takeout from literally anywhere in the world on demand. But all three of us are frustrated by the overall lack of smut. We filtered by explicit, dammit. Audrey is distracted by how fricking good the cocktail is this week, and explains to the expecting Mira the magic of “pump n dump.” 

https://archiveofourown.org/works/2573990/chapters/5726924

White Chocolate & Star Anise Martini

• 1 oz Heavy Cream

1. Add ingredients together in a cocktail shaker. Shake vigorously, about 15 seconds

The author provided their own! Fly Me Away by Goldfrapp

Epistolary Charms, a Lucius Malfoy/Hermione fic by bea_meupscotty

https://archiveofourown.org/works/14742692/chapters/34083581

Audrey’s first pick is an action-packed Snape and Hermione fic with magic, torture, cunning, true love, and a “sex barometer”. We talk about mind-Snapes: do you imagine a younger, scragglier book-like Snape when reading, or is the pull of Alan Rickman too strong? Abby goes “full Adam Driver” for her Snape but Mira sticks with Alan. 

https://archiveofourown.org/works/7392916/chapters/16792324

A Thyme to Die... By Fiendfyre (aka Raspberry Daiquiri):

• 2 fl oz Golden rum

1. Add ingredients together in a cocktail shaker. Shake vigorously, about 15 seconds

For the Syrup:

• 12 oz Fresh or Frozen raspberries

1. Add the above to a saucepan and cook over medium heat

Danger! High Voltage by The Electric Six

Crazy Little Things, a Luna/Hermione fic by dreiser

https://archiveofourown.org/works/2573990/chapters/5726924

Polyjuice potion, chocolate, and puns are eagerly abused in Mira’s especially-smutty first pick: a Lucius Malfoy/Hermione fic by the Artful Scribbler. Mira struggles to communicate with Audrey and Abby who are philistines and cannot appreciate her references to Much Ado About Nothing or You've Got Mail.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/2455553/chapters/5442782

Grasshopper:

• 1 oz Green crème de menthe

Instructions:

1. Add ingredients together in a cocktail shaker. Shake vigorously, about 15 seconds

This Mess We’re In by P.J. Harvey feat. Thom Yorke

Unforced Error, a Snape/Hermione fic by mswhich. https://archiveofourown.org/works/7392916/chapters/16792324