In which who even cares what happened, because Jasmine sounds like Jasmine again and I have loved having Cat and Adam but I also have missed my Canadian…Moose? I’m not great at pet names. But also this tip was weird and definitely not the best tip for Queensland because the only way you could do … Continue reading Episode 56. If You Look Good In Sweaters, Wear One Every Third Date.

In which Jasmine still sounds like Adam, and shit derails really quickly. There’s a good chance we focused to much on the illness aspect and not enough on the health aspect, but just have fun with it – we sure did.

In which Jasmine now sounds like an Australian man named Adam Sherman. I told him he was handsome and we didn’t even have sex so I don’t know if this tip is a win. Have a listen and you tell me.

In which Australian Jasmine (aka the wonderful, wonderful, Cat) wows me with her superior intellect *and* uses the phrase ‘fancy yourself up, you fucking troll’. We have basically solved all of the world’s problems and are now recruiting for Harems of men to carry us about the place as part of our new exercise regimen … Continue reading Episode 52 & 53. Wear High Heels Most of the Time – They’re Sexier! Unless He Happens to be Shorter Than You Are.

In which Jasmine* sounds a lot like a very articulate Australian woman named Cat, and I’m like a child learning to ride a bike without training wheels for the first time – except way more sweary. If this is your first time listening, I’d recommend going back to episode 42 and starting there. Don’t worry … Continue reading Episode 51. If You Dye Your Hair, Pick a Shade and Stick To It.

In which we eventually get to the tip, and Jasmine’s intro both over and underwhelms me. We launch our new perfume, Hot Tangent (which smells of Vodka that is mixed up about the story that nobody finished, lynx africa, semen, and elderberries, which are just berries that got really old) and we also introduce you … Continue reading Episode 50. Practice Drinking With Your Women Friends First.

Men still make passes at girls who wear glasses – or get contact lenses. In which I confirm that this tip works, things get generally very loose, and Jasmine gaslights me. She’s still super delightful and Canadian, and  I’m still slurring but I’m trying really hard to be less shit.

Ask his advice on what kind you should wear. In which we discover that all the men I know are sweethearts and we pitch a new TV show, General Hygiene For A Train Guy.

In which we attempt to solicit dick pics, and agree that this tip is rubbish. A RUBBISH TIP. ha. ha ha. You’re so welcome.

For all you know, he may be a diamond in the rough. In which we are both totally sober, but somehow I still slur, and Jasmine discusses her near death experience. We have also invented the perfect weapon –  Chihuahuas In Your Beehive *copyright symbol, don’t steal our idea, etc*.