May 06, 2025

Shut Down by Grief? A Trauma Informed Coach Explains How to Wake Up Your Nervous System

31 minutes

If you’ve ever felt completely shut down after a loss—unable to cry, think, or even get out of bed—this episode reveals why that happens and how to gently bring yourself back to life, one small step at a time.

In today's episode, I'm joined by Ashley Milus, a trauma-informed somatic grief and life transition coach who helps individuals navigate the emotional and physical toll of loss—whether through death, divorce, chronic illness, or other major life changes. Her practice is deeply informed by her own journey through complex personal grief, including serious health challenges and the loss of loved ones. Ashley supports clients in reconnecting with their bodies, regulating their nervous systems, and gently moving through emotions that feel overwhelming. With compassion and a strong understanding of trauma responses, she creates safe, validating spaces where healing can begin. Through this integrative somatic approach, Ashley helps people rediscover their sense of self and move forward with renewed strength and clarity. She also offers free consultations for those curious about exploring this path.

Throughout this episode, Ashley offers meaningful insight into how somatic healing addresses grief not just as an emotional or mental challenge, but as a full-body experience. She explains how our nervous systems instinctively protect us through responses like numbness or shutdown, and how working with these patterns can support deeper, lasting healing. Drawing on her own lived experiences, she illustrates how reconnecting with the body can restore a sense of safety, presence, and vitality. Ashley also shares practical, compassionate ways to support those experiencing grief, especially in the wake of sudden or traumatic loss. Her emphasis on listening, presence, and authentic connection brings depth to the episode—and reminds us that healing begins not with fixing, but with truly being there for one another.

Tune in to episode 334 as Ashley Milus shares how her personal journey through illness and loss led her to become a somatic grief coach—helping others heal by reconnecting with their bodies, regulating their nervous systems, and finding safety, presence, and meaning after profound grief.

In This Episode, You Will Learn:

What is Somatic Healing? (3:12)

Why we shut down during grief (5:30)

Working with the nervous system (6:33)

The power of compassionate presence (9:30)

Storytelling as a healing tool (10:32)

Supporting someone after sudden or traumatic loss (13:34)

A personal story of transformational support (15:51)

How to be the right kind of support (19:41)

Rethinking condolences: Why “Sorry for your loss” isn’t enough (21:46)

What to say: Creating comfort through connection (24:03)

Connect with Ashley Milus: