slanderhour

slanderhour

By slanderhourSociety & Culture
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slanderhour episodes

  • Semi - Meat

    How much meat moves

    Into the city each night
    The decks of its bridges tremble
    In the liquefaction of sodium light
    And the moon a chemical orange

    Semi-trailers strain their axles
    Shivering as they take the long curve
    Over warehouses and lofts
    The wilderness of streets below
    The mesh of it
    With Joe on the front stoop smoking
    And Louise on the phone with her mother

    Out of the haze of industrial meadows
    They arrive, numberless
    Hauling tons of dead lamb
    Bone and flesh and offal
    Miles to the ports and channels
    Of the city's shimmering membrane
    A giant breathing cell
    Exhaling its waste
    From the stacks by the river
    And feeding through the night

    24 min
  • Semi - Logic

    The Victorian Era provided the optimum conditions for the development of Logic through the marriage of mechanical development, ingenuity and an insatiable curiosity for the unknown and the strange. By the end of the 1900s, logic had developed a language and spectacle of its own, either  residing within an act on a music hall variety bill or presented in a stand-alone show in venues such as the Egyptian Hall or the Royal Polytechnic. These two venues became uniquely associated with logic from 1873 to 1905 and provided the perfect platform for renowned logicians such George Alfred Cooke and John Neville Maskelyne.

    22 min
  • Semi - Weetabix
    In British advertising in the 1980s, Weetabix anthropomorphized the biscuits, representing a group of 'street-wise' young teens, beginning as 'skinheads'. Their appearances on the packaging and associated publicity featured catchphrases such as "titchy breakfast cereals" to describe rivals, "nasty little w**flakes" to describe Cocoa Pops, and any pointed question from the media was met with the response "Neet Weet Mate", "OK!". The lead Weetabix, Helmut, was voiced by Bob Hoskins.
    44 min
  • Semi - Mousetrap

    The Mousetrap game, a long-time family favourite, is always good for zany action and lots of laughs. Scurry around the board collecting cheese and stealing cheese from other players, watch out for the trap! While kids are engaged in playing the Mousetrap game, they can also practice  valuable skills in construction, cause and effect, and decision-making. As they interact with the trap, a working, multipart machine, kids can practice construction skills.

    16 min
  • Semi - White Knights

    Are you a group of women going on holiday?

    Do you wish it was socially acceptable to bring your spouse along to your hen do?

    Do you need directions?


    It sounds like you need to get yourself at least one, if not three, White Knights

    24 min
  • Semi - Magazines
    Remember magazines? They were like the original Internet. You could find out about all sorts of stuff. Join us as we smear newsprint all over our hands and feel really nostalgic and delirious.
    29 min
  • Semi - Sticklebrick

    Stickle Bricks are a construction toy primarily intended for the people of Barnsley invented by Denys Fisher in 1969. The brand is owned by Hasbro, and as of 2016 is sub-licensed to Flair Leisure Products plc.

    Several companies manufacture similar toys, not all of them  compatible. Names for these toys include "Nopper", "Bristle Blocks",  "Fun Bricks", "Clipo", "Krinkles", "Multi-Fit", "Juckle Choks", "Wokkle Buddy" and "Thistle Blocks".


    Many recent sets also include other types of pieces such as heads, wings, patio doors, calves, wheels and teddy bear shapes.

    27 min
  • Semi - Woke

    Yesterday was Thursday, Thursday

    Today it is Friday, Friday (partyin’)
    We-we-we so excited
    We so excited
    We gonna have a ball today
    Tomorrow is Saturday
    And Sunday comes afterwards

    27 min
  • Semi - Food

    “At this moment I bit into one of my frankfurters, and -- Christ! I  can't honestly say that I'd expected the thing to have a pleasant taste.  I'd expected it to taste of nothing, like the roll. But this -- well,  it was quite an experience. Let me try and describe it to you.

          The frankfurter had a rubber skin, of course, and my temporary teeth  weren't much of a fit. I had to do a kind of sawing movement before I  could get my teeth through the skin. And then suddenly -- pop! The thing  burst in my mouth like a rotten pear. A sort of horrible soft stuff was  oozing over my tongue. But the taste! For a moment, I just couldn't  believe it! Then I rolled my tongue around it again and had another try.  It was fish! A sausage, a thing calling itself a frankfurter filled  with fish! I got up and walked straight out without touching my coffee.  God knows what that might have tasted of.”

    30 min
  • Semi - Gangsters

    See, the hardest thing for me was leaving  the life. I still love the life. And we were treated like movie stars  with muscle. We had it all, just for the asking. Our wives, mothers,  kids, everybody rode along. I had paper bags filled with jewellery stashed  in the kitchen. I had a sugar bowl full of coke next to the bed.  Anything I wanted was a phone call away. Free cars. The keys to a dozen  hideout flats all over the city. I'd bet twenty, thirty grand over a  weekend and then I'd either blow the winnings in a week or go to the  sharks to pay back the bookies. Didn't matter. It didn't mean anything.  When I was broke I would go out and rob some more. We ran everything. We  paid off cops. We paid off lawyers. We paid off judges. Everybody had  their hands out. Everything was for the taking. And now it's all over.  And that's the hardest part. Today, everything is different. There's no  action. I have to wait around like everyone else. Can't even get decent  food. Right after I got here I ordered some spaghetti with marinara  sauce and I got egg noodles and ketchup. I'm an average nobody. I get to  live the rest of my life like a schnook.

    27 min

About slanderhour

From the publisher's feed

A weekly pre-sleep, post-thought audio play investigating the nature of latent boredom and the strip-mining of emotional bereavement.