No mother-daughter relationship is perfect, but some are more difficult than others.

In this episode, Darlene Brock and Julie Bender sit down to share the distinct challenges they each had with their moms growing up. They open up about how the dysfunctional dynamic impacted their own motherhood duties and what they chose to do differently with their own children. 

Through each of their stories, you’ll glean advice on what to do (and not do) in your relationship with your child, how you can begin the process of mending a fractured mother-daughter relationship, and get the confidence you need to be the mother yours wasn’t.

“There’s nothing better than a mom who’s already traversed the road that you’re on.” —Darlene Brock

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—Revisit an earlier episode on mother-daughter relationships: Mama Drama Every Woman Has and How to Overcome – 008

—Darlene and Julie dish out more on the difficult relationships they had with their moms: This Is How to Handle a Hard Relationship With Your Mom – 089

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In this episode of This Grit and Grace Life, we revisit an important conversation with Dr. Holly Miller on women’s health, including issues you need to know but are probably too embarrassed to ask about. Dr. Miller is a board certified OB-GYN, wife of 20+ years, mother of four, and dedicated to ensuring you know everything you need to know about your feminine health.

This episode is filled with questions that women tend to run from…

When do we see a gynecologist?

It’s our goal with this episode to emphasize that your feminine health is extremely important, and you need to stop putting it on the back burner. Whether you’re busy or scared something is wrong and you don’t want to face it, you need to go see a gynecologist. It’s that simple! Neglecting your health is no way to handle potential issues you may be facing.

We know after listening, you’ll feel comfortable and confident scheduling your next appointment!

What else you’ll learn:

Dr. Holly Miller completed medical school at Loyola University Stritch School of Medicine and a residency in Obstetrics and Gynecology at Rush University Medical Center in Chicago. She’s currently an OB-GYN physician in Florida. Outside of the office, Dr. Miller enjoys reading, running and spending time with her husband and four children.

Find more from Dr. Miller by visiting her practice website here.

“It’s extremely important that women of all ages have a relationship with a doctor, specifically a gynecologist.” —Dr. Holly Miller

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Most people are unaware of the statistic that 1 in 3 women globally have experienced sexual assault.¹ This week’s guest, sadly, was one of those victims at the tender age of 14. 

Caroline Beidler joins Darlene Brock and Julie Bender this week to recount some of the early challenges she faced, including a diminished sense of self-worth, a lack of boundaries and a spiral into substance abuse.

Now 11 years sober and a passionate recovery advocate, Caroline shares how we can extend grace to those struggling with addiction, and what signs moms should look out for that may indicate their teenager is struggling with a deeper issue.

This topic is difficult, but one that is absolutely necessary to help those stuck in the cycle of addiction or substance abuse to feel understood and take the first steps toward recovery.

Caroline Beidler, MSW is an author, recovery advocate and founder of the storytelling platform Bright Story Shine where she has released several eBooks including 10 Practical Ways to Make Your Recovery Shine. 

With almost 20 years in leadership within social work and ministry, she leads Creative Consultation Services, LLC., a business focused on creating sustainable addiction recovery support services. She is also a Research Collaborator with the Lyda Hill Institute on Human Resilience at the University of Colorado, Colorado Springs and a team writer for Grit and Grace Life and blogger at the global recovery platform In the Rooms. 

Caroline lives in Tennessee with her husband and twins where she enjoys hiking in the mountains and building up her community’s local recovery ministry.

You can follow Caroline on Instagram @carolinebeidler_official, on Facebook @carolinebeidlermsw, and on her websites, brightstoryshine.com and carolinebeidler.com.

“When we open up and share our dark places and our secrets, something absolutely miraculous happens.” —Caroline Beidler

— Read Caroline’s article, This Is What I Would Say to the Man Who Raped Me

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Studies have proven that we’re more productive, live longer, and laugh more when we spend time with others. It only makes sense, then, that our relationships are significant to our existence—and that the most important purpose we can have is pouring into the lives of others.

On this week’s podcast, Darlene Brock and Julie Bender discuss how to do just that. They lay out a framework for how to show unconditional love to friends and family that have made both small and serious mistakes; they share stories of the women who invested in them and changed the trajectory of their lives; and they encourage us step into the lives of others to show support, remind them of their worth, or even to have that hard conversation.

Knowing that your purpose revolves around the investment you make in others’ lives can feel like a heavy burden, but it’s an opportunity rather than a responsibility. To know that we can be the person who believes the best in someone else—and to have someone be the same for us—is life changing.

“The purpose of human life is to serve, and to show compassion and the will to help others.” —Albert Schweitzer

—Read Darlene’s article about her aunt, who had a significant impact on her life: True Purpose Is Found in How We Care for Others

—Listen to Julie’s Praying for Your Husband Daily message, “Believing the Best in Him”

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Childhood memories stick with us for a long time, especially life-altering ones.

Grammy-winning artist Mandisa joins Darlene Brock and Julie Bender to share how she recognized her worth after a traumatic experience at 16 shattered her self-image and darkened her outlook on life. 

In this episode, Mandisa sheds light on issues that many Christians are hesitant to bring out into the open: things like depression, anxiety, and suicide. She unpacks the importance of therapy in her life, as well as how her faith and musical career strengthened her resolve and allowed her—and others—to find a path toward healing.

If you’re trying to reconcile with your own painful past, we encourage you to listen to this hopeful story that reaffirms God’s ability to bring beauty from ashes.

American Idol season-five alumna Mandisa is a Grammy Award–winning artist who got her start singing backup for Trisha Yearwood and Shania Twain. 

Her 2013 GRAMMY® award-winning album “Overcomer” debuted at No. 1 on the Billboard Christian Albums Chart. The album’s title track proved to be a smash at radio and earned the GRAMMY® for Best Contemporary Christian Music Song. With more than 1.6 million records sold, Mandisa is a voice of encouragement and truth to people facing life’s challenges all around the world.

You can follow Mandisa on Facebook @mandisaofficial, on Instagram @mandisaofficial and on her website, mandisaofficial.com/home.

“That’s one of the practical things I can do to reframe my thoughts, to not just give into the negative self-talk, but to say what God says about me instead.” —Mandisa

—Read Mandisa’s book, “Out of the Dark: My Journey Through the Shadows to Find God’s Joy“

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As a mom, it’s hard to filter out the opinions and recommendations from other people on how to raise your kids. Perfect social media mom influencers, coworkers, church friends, and even your own mother might have a formula for you to follow, and you may feel that if you’re not playing by the rules, well, then your kids won’t be alright. 

Guest Helen Smallbone (mom of Rebecca St. James and for KING & COUNTRY’s Joel and Luke) joins Darlene and Julie this week to share the good news: It’s okay to be a different kind of mom!

Take it from Helen, who took an out-of-the-box approach to motherhood herself. She packed up her family’s belongings and shuttled herself, her husband and their six kids (with another on the way!) from Australia to the United States to pursue the path she felt God was leading them. It led to a life on the road and an assembly of odd jobs to make ends meet, but her kids have grown up with a strong faith and successful careers. It was unorthodox, but it was right for them.

You know your kids better than anyone, and raising them the way you feel is best—no matter how it looks to those on the outside—will undoubtedly be what they need. We hope you feel encouraged that the path you have established for your family is the right one. And if you’re still on the fence, take a listen to this episode and see for yourself!

Helen Smallbone is the co-founder of MUMlife Community and a podcast host with AccessMore. Her passion is encouraging mothers and families with the God-breathed wisdom she has gleaned over 32 years of being a mother. 

Born and raised in Australia, Helen dedicated her life to Christ as a young teen at the Billy Graham Crusade in Sydney. Now a mother to seven―five boys and two girls―and grandmother to thirteen, she currently lives outside of Nashville, Tennessee, with her husband, David, and a small menagerie of animals.

You can follow Helen on Facebook @helenjsmallbone and on Instagram @helensmallbone.

“For me as a parent, it’s my job to encourage [my] child on their journey to seek out who God has made them to be.” —Helen Smallbone

—Read Helen’s book, “Behind the Lights: The Extraordinary Adventure of a Mum and Her Family”

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If you don’t already know, Julie is having a baby! (A girl!) 

At her recent baby shower, amid all the laughter and gifts from friends and family, there was a conversation about the fears people are feeling as a result of the daily circumstances occurring around the world—there was a general consensus that we’re heading into a scary future. 

That juxtaposition prompted Darlene and Julie to sit down and talk about our collective uncertainty about the future. Between cultural tension and disagreements, economic hardships, lingering pandemic worries and more, it can be hard to look forward to the future with hope. 

But Darlene and Julie remind us that it’s important to celebrate the good things, find community, and rely more than ever on a kind God who knows all—so we can not just survive, but thrive in the days to come.

“Even though I am fearful, I will choose to rely on the trust that I have in a good God who knows way more than me.” —Julie Bender

Check out these related podcast episodes

—Do Conversations about Race Have to Divide or Can They Unite? with Torrie Sorge – 185

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We hear a lot about wellness lately, which is an expanded view of our health from a holistic standpoint: emotional, physical, spiritual, and mental. Paying attention to each of these areas is vital for a healthy, invigorating life.

Drawing from her own history of debilitating health issues, wellness coach Rachel Hagstrom joins Darlene Brock and Julie Bender to talk more about what holistic wellness is. She also explains how you can begin to address each component to be in alignment with one another and your long-term goals, so you can walk away from this episode in control of your wellbeing!

Rachel is married to her favorite veteran (Go Army!) of 14 years, and is a mom to two spirited daughters and one kind goldendoodle. After years of struggling with health challenges, she decided to do her own research and make changes to take a more proactive approach toward her well-being. Now as a board-certified health and wellness coach, Rachel is passionate about walking alongside other women who seek opportunities for growth, healing, and transformation in their daily lives. When she’s not coaching, you’ll find her writing, reading, and spending time outdoors (most preferably next to the ocean, which only exists in her mind now that she lives in Dallas!)

You can follow Rachel on Instagram @rachelhagstrom and on her website, rachelhagstrom.com

“Learning how to be aware of my thoughts and what I’m thinking and ruminating on was a total game changer.” —Rachel Hagstrom

—Develop your own wellness vision with Rachel’s Wheel of Wellness model

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As women of faith, it’s not unusual or uncommon to have seasons where we question God. Whether we’re experiencing disappointment or grief or we feel utterly broken, the first words to escape us are “Why God?” and “Why do bad things happen to good people?”

In this podcast episode, Darlene Brock and Julie Bender talk about the times we live with battered faith and a diminishing loss of hope in the God we serve. They draw countless examples of men and women from the Bible who doubted God, struggled with their faith, and yet still came out on the other end with a restored heart. 

During the times when you feel your faith wavering, don’t forget that God cares enough to listen to our cries and frustrations. He doesn’t love us less when we doubt Him—He’ll be patient while we pound on His chest. If this describes how you’re feeling, we encourage you to be honest with Him, pray for clarity, and remember all the good He has done and will continue to do. Finding hope is possible.

“ God would draw me with him into eternity, into that time where question and answer would become one.” —Elie Wiesel

—Read Clay Jones’ book, Why Does God Allow Evil?

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Society is quick to point out the challenges of motherhood. We see it in the “Mommy needs wine” shirts at Target and read about the seemingly endless struggles from other moms on social media. We don’t deny that motherhood comes with its share of hard times, but with the difficult seasons come the rewarding ones, too.

Darlene Brock and Julie Bender sit down this week to talk about the beauty of being a mom—from the privilege of shaping a little one’s views and raising them with the potential to positively impact the world, to enjoying life from a child’s perspective and all of the other little gems that you’ll discover in the journey. 

There’s so much more to motherhood than the external pressure and fear of failure. Those exist, but so do all the magical moments. Take some time today to recognize all the good and wonder that comes from living life as a mom.

“Look for the joy that is a part of every single thing we do as moms.” —Julie Bender

—Purchase Darlene’s book, “Raising Great Girls”

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