Smashterpieces

Welcome to the first and likely final meeting of this HOA, we’re glad you’ve taken the time out of your busy schedule to be with us today. We don’t want to keep you here for too long so let’s just go ahead and jump into it, shall we? Today’s agenda is a collection of neighborhood complaints from the town of Smash that have been combined to form what we’re calling Smashterpiece #35: Animal Crossing. All parties involved have decided to remain anonymous out of fear for their safety. Complaint #1: One resident of Smash, hereby known only as “K”, grifted the town salesman out of roughly 50% more paper than she would ever need, he didn’t appreciate it. Complaint #2: Another resident, now known as “B”, was seen walking along the beach in the dark with what a neighbor described as “a look of murderous intent” and went fishing for several consecutive hours. Complaint #3: Multiple instances of people taking things out of the lost and found that is not their’s. We’re going to jump to our panel of experts now so they can talk about their month in the town of Smash, so I guess please enjoy that.

Join us next time as we totally win a completely free and non-haunted mansion in Smashterpiece #36: Luigi’s Mansion

Hello and welcome, we’re delighted that you have chosen to join us on the Smashterpieces Pokémon Photo Safari Extravaganza. Please remember to keep your hands and feet inside the vehicle at all times, Smashterpieces will not be held responsible for any loss of limb or other bodily harm you may sustain during your time spent with us. Each of you has been provided with three tools, all of them of vital importance to your journey. First of all there’s the illumina orbs, it can make the Pokémon glow and sometimes they jump higher, or at least that’s what the script says I have to say. Then you have your apples, those are mostly gonna come in handy when we enter the volcano portion of our tour. There may or may not be a Tyrantrum that appears, he will want you dead. What you’re gonna do in that case is throw the apple at him and he maybe won’t charge at you. If I’m being honest you got about a 50/50 shot on that one, I’m sure you’ll be fine. You also have a music player, it’s just there for tax reasons, it doesn’t do anything. Anyways if you’ve signed your liability waivers and have your cameras ready, we hope you enjoy your safari. In the meantime please enjoy this bonus episode on New Pokémon Snap, a game we brought into existence with our weird reality bending curse. Good luck!

We’ll return with Animal Crossing soon!

All rise for the honorable Judge Toadsworth. Today we find ourselves at the trial of one of history’s greatest monsters. This sick individual took advantage of the tired and weary at the worst possible moment, sick and desperate they clung to his lab coat begging for a cure he knew he did not have, and yet… he persisted. Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, this individual calls himself Dr. Mario, but he is no doctor! As evidence of this malicious malpractice, we present Smashterpiece #34: Dr. Mario 64! How does the jury feel about this falling block puzzle game? What does this game do impressively, and what does it do very unimpressively? Does the soundtrack sure exist? All that and more in today’s trial! … I mean episode!

Join us next time as we spend a month of cohabitation in an animal filled town in Smashterpiece #35: Animal Crossing

The crowd cheers, the combatants face each other. Here come the pokéballs, the battle is about to begin in earnest! Oh, it’s Alakazam! Oh, it’s Wooper! This does not seem like a fair fight, but let’s see how it plays out. Well, that Alakazam was knocked out before I even had a chance to blink, what an amazing battle this has been. While we wait for the next Pokémon to emerge, let’s take a second to tell the folks at home that this is the episode representing Fighter #19: Pichu, it’s the 2000 Nintendo 64 game Pokémon Stadium 2. What makes this game such an interesting piece of video game and Pokémon history? Why does it feel like the RNG seems unfairly against you in certain situations? What do we think of the minigames? And why does it feel like the soundtrack is overall such a dud? All this and more in today’s episode!

Join us next time when we get our medical licenses revoked in Smashterpiece #34: Dr. Mario 64

Let us look back, far into the past (roughly around 2001, so basically ancient). In the wondrous land of “Bun-Jee” a small single celled organism called “combat” enjoyed a carefree existence. But one day combat found itself in the shadow of a larger being called a MICROSOFT. At first it was afraid, but eventually the two formed a symbiotic relationship, and thus combat… evolved. Yes, I am aware the previous sentences sound like the rantings of a madman but to be honest you should know what you signed up for by now. Today’s episode is about the game representing fighter #458, Master Chief, it’s the one and only Halo: Combat Evolved. How did it feel playing this game in co-op, and how did this affect Joe’s first time playing in general? What is the fascinating development history behind this game? How is that music so damn good? All that and more in today’s episode!

Join us next time as we probably don't travel into the mushroom forest.

Hello, we’re back once agaI’M GONNA WIN! … We are here to talk abouYOU’VE HAD IT! … Can I please just get a full sentence out beCAN’T WIN ‘EM ALL! … This is seriously gratiYOU’RE WASTING MY TIME! I beg of you, just let me… oh, they’re done. Cool. Today’s discussion is about Smashterpiece #32: Pokémon Puzzle League, a reskin of Tetris Attack which in itself was a reskin of Panel de Pon. Why did we initially think this game would be a mistake, and how deep did we go into the game itself? Why does Joe describe the game’s sound design as “a nightmare”? Why is the soundtrack a weird one to discuss? And is Ash truly going to win? All that and more in today’s episode!

Join us next time as we battle our way up Gym Leader Castle in Smashterpiece #33: Pokémon Stadium 2

We’ve heard the words of many a wise guide throughout our years, a mentor or simply a person on the street trying to give us words to uplift us in a time of struggle. Sometimes however these beings of great knowledge instead ask us questions, ones meant to help us come up with our own wisdom that we too can pass on to those who come after. So we pass the question we were asked to you: Can you feel life moving through your mind? Can you feel time slipping down your spine? Basically what I’m saying is we played Sonic Adventure 2 for this bonus episode. While Melanie was hanging on to the edge of tomorrow, Joe did not enjoy this opportunity to live and learn from the works of yesterday. What does this game do well? Why is it seemingly responsible for the divide between generations of Sonic fans? How great is that music? Why does the dialogue all bleed intAnd why does Joe have such a beef with the level design? All that and more in this bonus episode.

We’ll be back soon for our final discussion on Pokemon Puzzle League!

Look, all I’m saying is that we were all sitting around, minding our own business, playin’ a nice friendly game of poker. Then BOOM. A witch blows up our house, does that seem fair to you? Really should’ve paid extra for that witch insurance… also probably should have taken out a life insurance policy on Bottles. Hindsight is 20/20, I guess. Today’s episode is about Smashterpiece #31: Banjo-Tooie, our final game developed by the legendary Rare and the second outing for the famous bear and bird trio! Our friend Pat joins us to discuss the adventure through the Isle O’ Hags in order to collect shiny golden puzzle pieces. Why do we think this game generally does not hold up as well as the first entry? What’s our favorite and least favorite levels? What problems arose specifically due to us playing the XBox 360 remaster? And why are the levels so damn big? All this and more in today’s episode!

Join us next time as we swap blocks and regret all the decisions that brought us to this point in Smashterpiece #32: Pokémon Puzzle League

The conclusion of our Bear & Bird adventure is coming soon, but for now it’s New Year’s Eve and it seems fitting to take this opportunity to look back and then look forward. We released episodes on ten games from our list this year, starting with Game & Watch Gallery and ending out on Majora’s Mask. What are our main takeaways from these experiences? How do we feel about the four bonus episodes we released as well? Finally, what does our next stretch potentially look like, as we leave the Nintendo 64 and enter the realm of the almighty Gamecube? Let’s also not forget that a new game has been added to our list since last we spoke, so we go ahead and discuss that a little too.

We’ll be back in a week or so with our episode on Banjo-Tooie, but for now have a Happy New Year and we’ll see you in 2021!

It’s time to take a brief detour from our witch hunting adventures and head back up into space real quick. We hear there’s some parasites that are just no good! Today’s bonus episode is on the 2002 Game Boy Advance title Metroid Fusion, where we join Samus on her journey to defeat the X Parasites. How do we think this game compares to Super Metroid? Why are all the bosses so absurdly difficult? How’s the soundtrack stack up? And why did this game come out the exact same year as Metroid Prime? All this and more in today’s episode!

We’ll be back soon with Banjo-Tooie!