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What happens when your toxic boss shares your identity? For Amber Polk, classically trained violinist turned educational advocate, this question became painfully personal when she found herself working under a Black female supervisor who constantly criticized her personality rather than her performance.

"I'm not going to dim my light just because you're threatened," Amber declares in this powerful conversation about workplace toxicity, professional growth, and finding your authentic voice. Growing up surrounded by Black excellence and attending schools where she saw Black leadership daily, Amber developed a strong sense of identity that would later be tested in professional settings where her confidence was misinterpreted as a threat.

The discussion ventures beyond typical workplace advice, diving deep into the psychological impact of toxic leadership. Amber vulnerably shares how shame influenced her initial response: "I automatically said I was the problem and it's my fault." Through therapy and self-reflection, she learned to recognize when leadership issues stemmed from others' insecurities rather than her own shortcomings.

This episode offers particular insight for introverts navigating extrovert-centered work environments, post-pandemic graduates facing disrupted career paths, and anyone who's felt pressured to shrink themselves to make others comfortable. Amber's journey from musical prodigy to advocate illuminates how our passions can evolve in unexpected directions when we remain true to our values.

Perhaps most powerful is Amber's closing wisdom: "Toxic environments deteriorate the humanity of who we are. And if you don't have to stay, don't." Her call to honor your intuition, recognize red flags early, and trust that better opportunities await serves as a reminder that sometimes walking away isn't giving up—it's choosing yourself.

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In this episode, George Borum shares his transformative journey through 15 years of educational leadership, surviving 11 different bosses while maintaining his commitment to student success and learning the value of playing the supporting role.

• Understanding the power of being in the "second chair" leadership position
• How playing supporting roles teaches valuable leadership skills, like Scottie Pippen alongside Michael Jordan
• The importance of connecting personally with staff members beyond classroom performance
• Why bad leadership creates toxic workplace environments that hurt student outcomes
• How school culture and staff culture are interdependent, not separate considerations
• The evolution of charter schools and providing educational options for families
• Challenges of the "no excuses" model in education and its impact on students
• Building meaningful parent partnerships by having honest, jargon-free conversations
• Creating a Montessori charter school that makes innovative learning accessible to all
• Learning from both good and bad leadership examples to develop your authentic style

If you're interested in supporting Schenectady Scholar Charter School or learning more about George's work blending Montessori principles with charter school accessibility, check out these links: 

https://www.linkedin.com/company/schenectady-scholars-charter-school/posts/?feedView=all

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Laura Butler's remarkable journey from band room to boardroom reveals how resilience and adaptability can transform career obstacles into opportunities for growth. Beginning with an unwavering passion for music education, Laura found her calling in high school classrooms where she created transformative experiences for students through band programs that functioned like families.

Behind the scenes, Laura navigated a gauntlet of challenges that many educators face: combative administrators who slashed budgets for essential program elements, parents threatening violence over discipline issues, and even dangerous situations involving weapons and drugs on campus. These experiences cultivated a resilience that would serve her throughout her career journey. "Teachers have PTSD too," she remarks, highlighting the often-overlooked stresses educators endure.

When her path as a music teacher was interrupted by her husband's military career and the impossible task of maintaining teaching credentials across state lines, Laura faced what she calls "an existential crisis." Rather than surrendering to circumstances, she discovered an unexpected opportunity working with transitioning military personnel. This pivot allowed her to apply her educator's heart in new ways – helping veterans translate their military experience into civilian success.

Through roles with government contractors, nonprofits, and major consulting firms, Laura has built programs that bridge the cultural and professional gaps between military and civilian worlds. Her work has contributed to dramatically reducing unemployment rates among veterans by addressing both practical skills and the subtle cultural adjustments necessary for their success in new environments.

Laura's story demonstrates how the skills developed in one career – teaching, mentoring, curriculum design, and navigating complex organizational politics – can become the foundation for success in entirely different sectors. For anyone feeling trapped in their current role or facing seemingly insurmountable career obstacles, her journey offers both inspiration and practical wisdom about finding new paths to purpose.

Have you faced unexpected career transitions? How might your current challenges be preparing you for future opportunities? Join the conversation and share your story of career resilience and reinvention.

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Katherine Coles shares her journey from struggling as a first-time leader to developing a leadership philosophy centered on partnership, integrity, and continuous learning. She transforms her understanding of what makes an effective leader by recognizing that leadership requires both self-awareness and intentional relationship-building.

• Leadership isn't about compelling people to follow but creating conditions where they choose to follow
• Only 8% of the population has true self-awareness, making intentional leadership development crucial
• Leaders who don't hear, see, or acknowledge team members create the worst working environments
• Speaking truth to power requires balancing the desire to be right with the desire to be heard
• Modern organizational systems often focus on outcomes while neglecting how people experience change
• Career transitions provide opportunities to develop adaptability and depth of understanding
• Building systems that honor people as much as performance creates sustainable organizational success
• Being grounded in personal values provides protection when navigating broken systems
• Faith can provide both direction and conviction when making difficult leadership decisions

If you're navigating broken systems, feeling unheard, or seeking to develop as a more effective leader, this conversation offers practical wisdom and inspiration. 

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Performance improvement plans are supposed to help employees get back on track, but as Harvard Business Review reports, a shocking 90% of employees placed on PIPs don't survive them. This episode pulls back the curtain on what a PIP really means for your career and future with your company.

When a friend called me about being put on a performance improvement plan, I examined the document and couldn't even determine what specifically needed improvement. That's when I realized the truth many managers won't admit: most PIPs aren't designed to help you succeed—they're the first step toward termination.

During this season of mass layoffs across industries, companies frequently use performance improvement plans as documentation to justify terminations and protect themselves legally. These plans create the paper trail needed to demonstrate "cause" and avoid severance payments. If you find yourself facing a PIP, you need to make a strategic decision: will you fight to prove them wrong, or focus your energy on finding your next opportunity?

The episode reveals ten crucial things companies won't tell you about PIPs, including their true purpose as legal documentation, the reality of "quiet firing," and why HR isn't a neutral party in the process. You'll learn concrete strategies for navigating a performance improvement plan, from ensuring goals are specific and measurable to documenting everything and knowing when to negotiate an exit.

Whether you're currently on a PIP or want to understand how these processes work, this episode provides honest guidance from someone who's seen both sides of the performance management equation. Share your own PIP survival story by reaching out at [email protected] or messaging @thoyourbosssucks on social media.

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Natalie Parker and leadership coach Ayana Coston dive into what happens behind the scenes when organizations call in executive coaches to help struggling leaders develop or correct performance issues.

• Most leaders lack fundamental leadership skills despite technical expertise
• Leadership effectiveness rarely measured in performance management
• Leaders need safe spaces to be heard without judgment
• Employees betraying themselves by not asking for what they need
• Cultural differences dramatically impact conflict management styles
• 95% of the time, the feared conversation is worse in your head than reality
• Giving feedback requires psychological safety on both sides
• Leaders being monitored/evaluated on keystroke counts rather than outcomes
• Understanding before action when addressing leadership issues
• Clear communication about values and expectations prevents misalignment

If you're working for a leader who isn't supporting you properly, have the conversation about what you need, document your approach, and be willing to make changes if the environment doesn't improve. Remember that your value isn't determined by one workplace.

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Finding yourself stuck with a terrible boss can feel like a nightmare, but what if you could spot the warning signs before accepting the job? In this illuminating conversation with talent matchmaker Julia Cooper, we uncover the secrets to test-driving potential managers during the interview process.

Julia reveals that authenticity has become the true currency of successful workplace relationships. As a recruiter who has placed thousands of candidates throughout her career, she shares insider knowledge on how to identify red flags in leadership styles. From observing how engaged managers are during interviews to paying attention to whether they apologize for tardiness, these subtle cues often predict future behavior.

The discussion tackles today's most pressing workplace challenges, including the post-pandemic tension between remote flexibility and office requirements. One listener's frustration with inconsistent policies prompts practical advice: if remote work matters to you, verify whether your potential manager works remotely—this often determines the team's long-term arrangement. We also address the delicate dance of setting boundaries in a world where technology enables 24/7 connectivity.

Most valuably, Julia provides five essential questions every candidate should ask potential managers: How would you describe your leadership style? How do you keep your team motivated during challenges? How do you set goals and measure success? How do you onboard new team members? What's the most important leadership lesson you've learned?

Remember that in today's job market, organizations should be selling themselves to you just as much as you're selling your skills. Don't be afraid to interview the company while they're interviewing you—your future happiness depends on it.

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Racial slurs in the workplace, managers who know nothing about your job, and organizations eliminating leadership positions – welcome to the wild world of modern work. In this eye-opening conversation, HR executive DeVaughn G. Stephens and host Natalie Parker pull back the curtain on what really happens behind closed doors in corporate America.

DeVaughn shares the shocking story of a boss who called him an "effing moolie" during his first professional HR role, revealing how this trial-by-fire experience taught him to manage his reactions and take ownership of his career development. Their discussion examines the critical moment when DeVaughn realized "the better this resume becomes, the better I have to become" – fundamentally changing his approach to professional growth.

Far from just war stories, this episode delivers actionable insights for anyone navigating difficult leadership. DeVaughn explains why documenting your accomplishments, knowing when to speak up, and recognizing when to leave are essential skills for workplace survival. The conversation explores the concerning trend of organizations flattening hierarchies and eliminating management positions, questioning how this impacts employee development and supervision.

Most powerfully, DeVaughn challenges listeners to take full responsibility for their professional journeys: "Your career is your career. It is not the organization's, it is not your manager's." He and Natalie examine why HR professionals often give excellent career advice while failing to apply the same wisdom to their own situations.

Whether you're dealing with a boss who can't take feedback, considering when to pull the ripcord on a toxic job, or simply trying to navigate workplace politics, this candid conversation provides the perspective and strategies you need to thrive despite challenging leadership.

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What happens when your manager treats their job like Gollum from Lord of the Rings – clutching tasks while muttering "my precious"? Sarah Vaughn Benjamin knows exactly how this feels.

During her seven-year journey from academia to corporate HR, Sarah encountered the classic territorial boss who demanded help yet refused to delegate meaningful work. "I was just stuck," she recalls, describing how her manager claimed ownership with the chilling words: "It's my department." This stark example of leadership insecurity left Sarah feeling underutilized despite being repeatedly told she was "a rock star" – a phrase that now makes her cringe.

The conversation takes a fascinating turn as Sarah reveals how COVID-19 became her unexpected catalyst for change. Furloughed and uncertain, she leveraged social media to connect with others who had pivoted careers, ultimately transforming her student life experience into a corporate learning and development role. Her resourcefulness demonstrates how career transitions often require both careful skill mapping and the courage to leap into uncertainty.

Now an HR Business Partner, Sarah shares a profound insight from her therapist: "You can't work in HR and be a sponge. You have to be a mirror." This powerful metaphor captures the delicate balance HR professionals must strike – reflecting situations back to managers rather than absorbing all the emotional weight themselves. When managers avoid difficult conversations or create unnecessary barriers for employees, HR must help navigate these challenges while maintaining organizational integrity.

The episode concludes with practical advice for listeners dealing with career-blocking bosses or suspected "quiet firing." Sarah and host Natalie emphasize the importance of documenting patterns, asking direct questions, and paying attention to how managers respond. Whether you're facing a territorial boss or fighting for professional growth, this conversation provides the strategies you need to maintain your dignity while advancing your career path. Remember: disappointment often stems from misaligned expectations – but you have the power to clarify yours.

Don't let your boss suck the life out of you.
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What happens when toxic leadership meets talented professionals? In this riveting conversation with executive coach Ayanna Coston, we unpack the painful reality of navigating bad bosses while preserving your authentic self.

Ayana shares her experience with her first corporate boss—a leader who disappeared when things went well but materialized instantly when problems arose. She introduces us to the "throw the rock syndrome," where bosses criticize without providing direction, leaving employees endlessly guessing what success looks like. This experience taught Ayanna to advocate for herself through strategic questioning and maintain her integrity despite challenging circumstances.

The conversation takes a powerful turn as we explore how professionals from marginalized backgrounds often compromise their identities to succeed in corporate environments. From code-switching to changing hairstyles, both hosts share personal stories of the sacrifices made to appear "acceptable" in professional spaces. As Ayana notes, "For years I didn't wear sewing weaves, I didn't wear braids... but it took a toll and damaged my hair." This candid discussion highlights how younger generations are increasingly rejecting these compromises.

We also tackle the declining interest in management positions, with Ayana revealing that 85-90% of her coaching clients express reluctance to pursue leadership roles. This trend signals a significant shift in how professionals view career advancement, challenging organizations to create alternative paths for technical experts who deserve recognition without managing people.

The episode concludes with practical wisdom for anyone struggling with difficult leadership, emphasizing self-knowledge and intentional responses to workplace challenges. As Ayana advises, "Pick battles big enough to matter but small enough to win." Whether you're dealing with a toxic boss or navigating organizational politics, this conversation offers strategies to survive, thrive, and maintain your authentic self along the way.

Don't let your boss suck the life out of you.
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Learn more or Book Natalie.