Leaving a relationship that you know isn’t good for you is hard. But sometimes, staying gone is even harder.

In this episode of Soulful Wahine, I’m joined by my close friend Ronalyn for an honest conversation about what happens after you leave. We talk about the grief that can come with choosing yourself, missing someone you know wasn’t good for you, questioning whether you made the right decision, and the moments that can make going back feel easier than continuing forward.

We also talk about the reality that leaving doesn’t always happen once. Sometimes people go back. Sometimes it takes multiple attempts. Going back doesn’t erase the progress, awareness, or strength it took to leave in the first place.

Because healing doesn’t require you to stop loving someone before you recognize that the relationship is no longer healthy for you.

This conversation is about the part we don’t always talk about: what it actually takes to stay gone once the adrenaline of leaving wears off and you’re left figuring out who you are and what your life looks like without that relationship.

It’s one of the most confusing parts of healing—knowing someone hurt you, knowing distance was necessary, and still finding yourself missing them anyway.

In this episode, we talk about why grief doesn’t always mean you made the wrong decision, why missing someone isn’t the same as needing them back, and how sometimes the deepest loss isn’t the person themselves.

Sometimes we’re grieving the relationship we deserved, the apology we never received, the future we imagined, or the version of someone we kept hoping they would become.

We also explore the difference between remembering someone and romanticizing them, why grief comes in waves, and what it can look like to hold two truths at once: I can miss you, and still know I need distance.

Because healing isn’t always grieving what happened.

Sometimes it’s grieving what never got the chance to happen.

Have you ever made a decision that was right for you… but still felt guilty afterward?

In this episode, we’re talking about why choosing yourself can feel so uncomfortable, especially if you’ve spent years prioritizing everyone else’s needs before your own.

We’ll explore where that guilt comes from, why guilt isn’t always a sign that you’ve done something wrong, and how healing often asks us to disappoint the version of ourselves that believed love had to be earned through self-sacrifice.

If you’ve ever struggled to set boundaries, felt responsible for everyone else’s emotions, or questioned whether choosing yourself makes you selfish, this conversation is for you.

🤎 If this episode resonated with you, please know that you are not alone and that you are seen here.

Before we even stop to ask ourselves what we’re feeling, many of us have already started building a case against our own emotions.

“Maybe I’m overreacting.”

“Other people have it worse.”

“I shouldn’t let this bother me.”

Sound familiar?

In this episode, we’re unpacking why so many of us have learned to question our emotional experiences before we’ve ever become curious about them. We explore where this pattern comes from, the difference between understanding your emotions and acting on them, and how self-trust begins when we stop putting our feelings on trial.

If you’ve ever felt guilty for having emotions, minimized your own pain, or struggled to trust yourself, this conversation is for you.

🌺 In this episode, we’ll explore:

• Why we feel the need to justify our emotions
• The difference between feelings and facts
• How self-doubt quietly disconnects us from ourselves
• What emotional curiosity actually looks like
• Why healing starts with listening instead of judging

Thank you for being here. I hope this episode helps you find language for something you’ve been carrying.

Have you ever looked around and thought, “I have people in my life… so why do I still feel so alone?”

In this week’s episode of Soulful Wahine, we’re talking about emotional loneliness, a type of loneliness that can be incredibly confusing because it isn’t always about being physically alone.

We explore why emotional loneliness can be so difficult to recognize, why so many people feel guilty for experiencing it, and why it’s often harder to talk about than we realize. Sometimes you can be surrounded by people who love you and still feel like no one truly sees or understands what you’re carrying.

If you’ve ever questioned your own feelings, felt guilty for wanting deeper connection, or wondered why your loneliness doesn’t seem to make sense, this conversation is for you.

I hope this episode helps you feel a little more understood and reminds you that your experience deserves compassion, not judgment.

🌺 Connect with me:

Instagram: @soulfulwahine

YouTube: @soulfulwahine

Season 1 of Soulful Wahine started with conversations about healing, self-discovery, boundaries, attachment styles, nervous system regulation, and what it means to come home to yourself.

But as this first season comes to a close, I’ve found myself asking a deeper question:

What made healing necessary in the first place?

In this season finale, I’m reflecting on the lessons this podcast has taught me, the power of honesty over perfection, and why I believe it’s time for us to have deeper conversations about the experiences that shape us.

We talk about emotional loneliness, silence within families and communities, the difference between being loved and feeling emotionally seen, and why healing is so much bigger than self-care routines and coping skills.

Most importantly, we explore the idea that growth isn’t just about learning how to move forward—it’s also about understanding what you’ve been carrying all along.

Thank you for being part of Season 1 of Soulful Wahine. I am so grateful you’re here, and I can’t wait for what’s ahead in Season 2.

When I left Maui at 17 years old, I thought I was simply moving away for college.

What I didn’t realize was how much leaving Hawaiʻi would challenge me, shape me, and ultimately help me become the woman I am today.

In this episode, I share my experience of moving from Maui to Utah—the culture shock, friendship struggles, loneliness, identity shifts, and lessons that came with building a life away from home.

But this isn’t a story about hardship.

It’s a story about growth.

It’s about learning how to stand firmly in your values, finding your place in unfamiliar spaces, carrying your culture with you wherever you go, and discovering strengths you never knew you had.

I talk about:

• Culture shock and feeling different

• Missing home and the little things you don’t expect

• Friendship and belonging

• Learning how to be alone

• Finding my values and standing on them

• How moving shaped me as a therapist and family member

• Living aloha away from Hawaiʻi

• Why Hawaiʻi will always be part of who I am

This episode is deeply personal, and I hope it resonates with anyone who has ever left home, felt caught between two worlds, or wondered where they truly belong.

Mahalo for listening. 🌺

One year later… and wow, what a journey it’s been 🥹🌺✨

In this special episode of Soulful Wahine, I’m reflecting on what this podcast has taught me about healing, womanhood, vulnerability, and finally finding my voice as a Hawaiian woman, therapist, and creator. 🤍

When I first started this podcast, I honestly didn’t realize how much I would grow alongside it. Over the past year, Soulful Wahine has become more than just a podcast — it’s become a space for honesty, softness, accountability, storytelling, culture, community, and emotional healing 🌊🌙

In this episode, I talk about:

✨ The unexpected ways healing has shown up in my own life

✨ What womanhood means to me now vs. when I first started

✨ Learning to take up space unapologetically

✨ The fear of being seen online and how I pushed through it

✨ How this community changed me for the better

✨ The beauty (and discomfort) of evolving publicly

Whether you’ve been here since Episode 1 or you’re brand new to the Soulful Wahine family, thank you for being part of this journey 🫶🏽🌺

This episode is personal, reflective, emotional, and a reminder that healing isn’t just about becoming someone new — sometimes it’s about finally returning home to yourself 🤍

As we step into May—AAPI Heritage Month—I found myself reflecting on what this journey has actually looked like for me. It’s been 5 years of being a therapist, and almost a full year of Soulful Wahine… and if I’m being honest, I don’t always take the time to pause and really sit with that.

So instead of jumping into another topic, I wanted to slow down and share what this work has genuinely taught me.

Not just as a therapist, but as a Polynesian woman navigating healing, relationships, and identity in real life.

In this episode, I talk about:

• what I had to unlearn about healing
• why being understood matters more than being “fixed”
• what it actually looks like to sit with someone in their pain without trying to change it
• and how this work has changed the way I see people… and myself

This isn’t a “perfectly packaged” episode.

It’s reflective, grounded, and honest.

Hot takes I have as a therapist… that might piss you off.

In this episode, I’m getting real about the patterns I see over and over again—the ones that keep people stuck, even when they’re “doing the work.”

We’re talking about the gap between awareness and change, why closure isn’t something other people give you, and how certain behaviors that look like growth are actually rooted in self-abandonment.

This episode isn’t meant to shame you.

It’s meant to challenge you to look at what you might be tolerating, avoiding, or holding onto—and why.

If something makes you pause, sit with it.

That’s usually where the shift begins.