"Where is this guy? I want to be rescued. And then I realised: No one is coming to save me."

In Episode 31 of Speak Shame, author Sacha Hughes shares her journey from self-sabotage to self-love and how she turned her pain into a published novel.

 When Sacha was 24, her mum died of cancer. She turned to Pinot Grigio to numb the grief. For years, she believed Mr. Right would rescue her from the depths of despair. When that marriage ended in divorce, she had a choice: sink or rise.

 She chose to rise.

 What you'll hear: 

·      Growing up as the shy, anxious youngest of four already carrying the belief "I'm not good enough" 

·      How her mother's death sent her into a decade of self-sabotage, numbing with drugs & alcohol, and searching for rescue 

·      The moment she realised: "This breakdown is going to become my breakthrough" 

·      Five years of reading spiritual books while her children slept, absorbing Louise Hay, Wayne Dyer, Eckhart Tolle 

·      The Shirley Valentine moment that sparked her debut novel 

·      Her advice: "Stop leaning into the hurt. Start leaning into the lessons."

 Sacha's message: You are responsible for your life. No one is coming to save you. Put on your own superhero cape and become your own heroine.

 If you've been waiting for rescue, if you're stuck in self-sabotage, if you feel like a fraud in your own life, this conversation is for you.

 Topics covered: grief and loss, self-sabotage, numbing with drugs and alcohol, people pleasing, imposter syndrome, spiritual awakening, divorce recovery, turning pain into purpose, finding your voice, writing as healing

📖 Get Sacha's book: Love, Grief, and More Sex Than Pinot
📲 Connect with Sacha: Instagram @SachaHughes | SachaHughes.com | Facebook

01:17 Meet Sacha Hughes

02:00 Chapter One Childhood

04:51 Losing Mum and Coping

06:48 Marriage Divorce Turning Point

07:36 Healing Books and Meaning

08:39 Holiday Spark Writing Begins

09:43 Becoming an Author

12:50 Advice for Feeling Stuck

15:54 Getting Visible and Connecting

17:31 Where to Find Sacha

18:24 Key Takeaways and Self Rescue

20:15 Shame Themes and Identity

22:13 Remarkable Woman Tribute

GET IN TOUCH

• Join the community:
• @DrConnieKerali on Instagram
• Sign up for my Born Worthy newsletter to get your weekly dose of empowerment.
• Are you ready to break free from the shame that keeps you stuck? My free, on-demand, Shame Resilience Workshop is for Remarkable Women who are tired of hiding parts of themselves and are ready to step into a life of authenticity, courage, & self-compassion.
• Hello Remarkable Woman, do you know your story matters but don't know how to tell it yet? Join The Storytellers Club, a free, private community hub to discover the power hidden in your story through creativity & connection.

"You don't have to explain your ambition. You can just be ambitious."

In episode 30 of Speak Shame, journalist and author Rachel Hartigan shares her journey from feeling like an imposter in journalism to writing a book that unravels one of history's greatest mysteries: Amelia Earhart's disappearance.

Rachel spent 12 years at National Geographic covering everything from genetic potatoes to the long road to women's suffrage. But it was two expeditions to a remote Pacific island – searching for traces of Amelia Earhart – that led her to write Lost: Amelia Earhart's Three Mysterious Deaths and One Extraordinary Life.

 What you'll hear: 

·      How Rachel found her way into journalism (hint: her dad handed her a magazine) 

·      Why she felt like she was "faking it" for years and when that changed 

·      What she learned about storytelling from writing 200-word pieces on genetic potatoes 

·      The moment she realised she could write a book 

·      Why Amelia Earhart refused to explain her ambition and what that means for women today 

·      Rachel's advice to her younger self: "Stop wasting energy on insecurity. Just try."

Rachel's message: You don't have to justify what you want to do. Men don't have to explain themselves so why should we?

If you're a writer, journalist, or woman tired of over-explaining your ambition, this conversation is for you.

Topics covered: journalism career path, imposter syndrome, National Geographic, Amelia Earhart mystery, female ambition, writing a book, not apologising for your goals, women in history

📖 Get Rachel's book: Lost: Amelia Earhart's Three Mysterious Deaths and One Extraordinary Life 

🌐 Connect with Rachel: RachelHartiganAuthor.com; Instagram: @RJ_Hartigan 

01:12 Meet Rachel Hartigan

02:16 Origin Story: Reader

03:46 Finding Journalism Path

08:00 Owning Journalist Identity

10:06 National Geographic Curiosity

13:25 Lessons as a Reporter

16:37 Amelia Earhart Expeditions

20:25 Why Earhart Still Matters

25:42 Ambition Without Apology

28:23 Next Book Ideas

29:37 Advice for Aspiring Writers

31:25 Words to Younger Self

32:31 Where to Find Rachel

33:38 Remarkable Woman Inspiration

GET IN TOUCH

• Join the community:
• @DrConnieKerali on Instagram
• Sign up for my Born Worthy newsletter to get your weekly dose of empowerment.
• Are you ready to break free from the shame that keeps you stuck? My free, on-demand, Shame Resilience Workshop is for Remarkable Women who are tired of hiding parts of themselves and are ready to step into a life of authenticity, courage, & self-compassion.
• Hello Remarkable Woman, do you know your story matters but don't know how to tell it yet? Join The Storytellers Club, a free, private community hub to discover the power hidden in your story through creativity & connection.

In this inspiring episode of Speak Shame, Dr Connie Kerali interviews Jennifer Schroeder, who at 58 was told her skills were “obsolete” and faced systemic age bias after hundreds of rejections. Jennifer recounts a planned 15-minute meeting where she was threatened with a performance improvement plan or severance, describing shock, shame, anger, and an out-of-body feeling, followed by months of replaying the event and noticing earlier signs like being excluded from meetings. Needing income, she tried various jobs while recovering for 12–18 months. She later posted videos on LinkedIn and TikTok, sparking thousands of responses from others experiencing similar discrimination, and grew The Unobsolete to support both HR leaders and professionals. Her key advice is to pay attention, document workplace issues, and remember you are not powerless or obsolete.

01:14 Introducing Jennifer Schroeder

03:21 A Career Turned Upside Down

04:43 Shock and Out of Body

06:27 The Walk of Shame

08:51 Red Flags in Hindsight

11:50 Aftermath at Home

15:11 Rebuilding After the Blow

18:49 Birth of The Unobsolete

20:48 Stories From the Community

23:17 Turning Posts Into a Mission

26:59 Practical Survival Advice

29:48 Where to Find Jennifer

30:39 Purpose From Pain

31:48 Not Powerless

33:27 A Remarkable Woman Tribute

JENNIFER SCHROEDER

Linkedin: Jennifer Schroeder

TikTok: @TheUnobsolete

Instagram: @TheUnobsolete

YouTube: Coming Soon

GET IN TOUCH

• Join the community:
• @DrConnieKerali on Instagram
• Sign up for my Born Worthy newsletter to get your weekly dose of empowerment.
• Are you ready to break free from the shame that keeps you stuck? My free, on-demand, Shame Resilience Workshop is for Remarkable Women who are tired of hiding parts of themselves and are ready to step into a life of authenticity, courage, & self-compassion.
• Hello Remarkable Woman, do you know your story matters but don't know how to tell it yet? Join The Storytellers Club, a free, private community hub to discover the power hidden in your story through creativity & connection.

In this episode of Speak Shame, Dr Connie Kerali is joined by Dr. Jenn (Jennifer Noble), a licensed psychologist and parent coach specialising in children, teens, identity development, and the mixed-race population, and founder of Free to Be Collective. Dr Jenn shares her early life in Santa Monica shaped by diversity and international travel, and discusses her own mixed-race identity (African American and Sri Lankan Tamil) and how being read as Black influenced her understanding of perception and identity. She describes recognising a gap when mixed-race adults at community events revealed they had never processed identity with their parents, often feeling shame and pressure to choose one “box.” Dr Jenn explains her work helping parents understand the “third” mixed-race experience, increase intentional cultural exposure, and support adolescents navigating appearance, belonging, and assumptions. She highlights how societal expectations create shame and names Wangarī Maathai as a key inspiration.

00:00 Mixed Race Identity Gap

00:33 Meet Dr Connie Kerali

01:09 Introducing Dr. Jenn

02:47 Chapter One: Origins

04:55 Finding Her Purpose

08:27 The Need She Saw

11:30 Coaching Parents Basics

13:49 Cultural Exposure Matters

16:53 Sade and Self Freedom

19:40 Advice for Mixed Race Teens

23:49 Key Takeaways for Everyone

25:57 Connect with Dr Jenn

27:23 Shame and One Box Thinking

29:50 Remarkable Woman Inspiration

DR. JENN (JENNIFER NOBLE)

INSTAGRAM: @DrJennPsych

WEBSITE: FreeToBeCollective.com 

GET IN TOUCH

• Join the community:
• @DrConnieKerali on Instagram
• Sign up for my Born Worthy newsletter to get your weekly dose of empowerment.
• Are you ready to break free from the shame that keeps you stuck? My free, on-demand, Shame Resilience Workshop is for Remarkable Women who are tired of hiding parts of themselves and are ready to step into a life of authenticity, courage, & self-compassion.
• Hello Remarkable Woman, do you know your story matters but don't know how to tell it yet? Join The Storytellers Club, a free, private community hub to discover the power hidden in your story through creativity & connection.

Dr Connie Kerali has a powerful conversation with the remarkable, Neelu, a business coach and single mother of four, about domestic violence, coercive control, financial abuse, and marital rape within a 17-year marriage. Neelu shares growing up in a conservative Muslim family, being pushed toward marriage from her teens, and recognising dysfunction through motherhood and learning healthier parenting. She describes escalating control by her husband and in-laws, neglect during pregnancies, coerced pregnancies, and isolation, alongside family toxicity, stigma around mental health, and being treated as “crazy” after seeking therapy and Prozac for clinical depression. After repeated broken promises, failed couples counselling, and her husband leaving the family while withholding support, Neelu chose divorce and also distanced herself from her own family. She now rebuilds independence, sets boundaries, and uses social media to reduce shame and support other women.

01:30 Introducing Neelu

06:58 Motherhood Wake Up Call

08:10 Unlearning and Boundaries

19:45 Engagement Red Flags

28:56 Control and Neglect

33:37 Marital Rape and Pregnancy

40:11 Fourth Pregnancy Turning Point

43:40 Job Loss and COVID Return

47:57 Back in Kerala Toxic Homes

52:13 Depression and Seeking Help

01:02:59 Money Control and Neglect

01:07:19 Decision to Divorce

01:12:33 Healing and Boundaries

01:20:00 Happily Divorced Community

01:24:40 No Shame and Hope

01:29:56 Reclaiming Joy Post Divorce

NEELU

• Instagram: @HappilyDivorced.Neelu

UK SUPPORT SERVICES

• In an emergency, dial 999; for non-emergencies or dial 101 (UK only)
• Find your nearest NHS Sexual Assault Referral Centre
• Find an NHS Talking Therapy service near you or contact your GP surgery
• Charities: Mind, The Samaritans, Rape Crisis, Women’s Aid, or Victim Support

GET IN TOUCH

• Join the community:
• @DrConnieKerali on Instagram
• Sign up for my Born Worthy newsletter to get your weekly dose of empowerment.
• Are you ready to break free from the shame that keeps you stuck? My free, on-demand, Shame Resilience Workshop is for Remarkable Women who are tired of hiding parts of themselves and are ready to step into a life of authenticity, courage, & self-compassion.
• Hello Remarkable Woman, do you know your story matters but don't know how to tell it yet? Join The Storytellers Club, a free, private community hub to discover the power hidden in your story through creativity & connection.

In this episode of Speak Shame we discuss sexual violence, attempted suicide, and eating disorders and with support links are provided below. Dr Connie interviews Poonnamme, a Sikh woman raised between the UK and Punjab, with over 35 years in health and social care, who now also facilitates Kundalini Shakti activation. She shares how being the first-born girl and only child brought intense pressure tied to family honour and community expectations, including expectations around education and status. She describes being sexually assaulted at 17 by someone known to the family and a subsequent attempted suicide. She shares that at 18 she entered an arranged marriage and describes living “two lives” as a Western professional and a traditional subservient wife. Becoming a mother was a turning point in her decision to break cycles for her daughter. Poonnamme reflects on how her experiences shaped her voice, resilience, and ability to feel pride in both who she is and who she was. 

01:40 Introducing Poonnamme

04:43 Firstborn Expectations

08:24 Schooling And Illness

11:14 Career Dreams Clash

12:51 Sexual Assault Silence

16:25 Aftermath And Survival

25:10 Arranged Marriage Begins

26:02 Two Lives At Home & At Work

29:09 A Manager Believes

34:59 Leaving To Break Cycles

36:49 Healing And Sharing

41:42 Trauma In The Body

43:23 Eating Disorder Spiral

47:36 Crossroads With Substances

56:20 Self Healing Awakening

01:00:00 Launching Healing Practice

01:03:37 Identity And Finding Voice

01:13:56 Advice For Feeling Stuck

01:21:02 Where To Find Poonnamme

01:27:51 Remarkable Women And Gratitude

POONNAMME

• Instagram: @JagoSacredEnergy
• Website: JagoSacredEnergy.co.uk

UK SUPPORT SERVICES

• In an emergency, dial 999; for non-emergencies or dial 101 (UK only)
• Find your nearest NHS Sexual Assault Referral Centre
• Find an NHS Talking Therapy service near you or contact your GP surgery
• Charities: Mind, The Samaritans, Rape Crisis, Women’s Aid, Victim Support

GET IN TOUCH

• Join the community:
• @DrConnieKerali on Instagram
• Sign up for my Born Worthy newsletter to get your weekly dose of empowerment.
• Are you ready to break free from the shame that keeps you stuck? My free, on-demand, Shame Resilience Workshop is for Remarkable Women who are tired of hiding parts of themselves and are ready to step into a life of authenticity, courage, & self-compassion.
• Hello Remarkable Woman, do you know your story matters but don't know how to tell it yet? Join The Storytellers Club, a free, private community hub to discover the power hidden in your story through creativity & connection.

In this week’s episode of Speak Shame, Dr Connie Kerali speaks with Vasavi Kumar, licensed therapist, mindset coach, voice actor, TV host, and author of Say It Out Loud. Vasavi shares how she began to stop doubting herself and regain trust in her voice by developing an “immaculate” inner narrative - one that is kind, encouraging, and safe - so that external criticism no longer carries the same weight. She explains how her work has evolved over 15 years alongside her own personal growth, and how sharing the truth with emotion and precision helps her connect with clients who are on a similar path. Vasavi offers a practical example of challenging limiting beliefs by reframing the fear of raising prices for her Out Loud School. She also reflects on Bad Bunny’s Super Bowl performance as a reminder for women of colour and children of immigrants to stay true to their culture without whitewashing themselves for acceptance. Vasavi discusses how grief after her father’s death in May 2025 led her to temporarily silence herself, and how returning to speaking out loud helped her process emotions and reduce shame. She closes by emphasising that shame festers in silence and isolation, and that everyone needs a safe place to be witnessed and express themselves - one of the reasons she created the Out Loud School, which she notes is not therapy but is therapeutic.

00:00 The impact of silencing yourself and why shame shrivels when voiced

01:05 Introduction to Speak Shame and guest Vasavi Kumar

03:45 Vasavi’s “first chapter”: ending self-doubt and trusting her voice

07:00 Rewiring the inner narrative and treating yourself with respect

12:40 Helping others while doing your own ongoing inner work

15:40 How telling the truth and sharing personal stories attracts aligned clients

19:10 A practical reframe: challenging limiting beliefs when raising prices

27:10 Bad Bunny, authenticity, and refusing to whitewash culture for acceptance

35:30 Grief, losing your voice after her father’s death, and returning to expression

42:10 Why not using your voice affects mental, emotional, physical and financial wellbeing

48:15 Finding a safe place to “say it out loud” and what Out Loud School offers

55:10 Where to find Vasavi and her remarkable woman inspiration

VASAVI KUMAR

• Instagram: @MyNameIsVasavi

• Website: vasavikumar.com

GET IN TOUCH

• Join the community:
• @DrConnieKerali on Instagram
• Sign up for my Born Worthy newsletter to get your weekly dose of empowerment.
• Are you ready to break free from the shame that keeps you stuck? My free, on-demand, Shame Resilience Workshop is for Remarkable Women who are tired of hiding parts of themselves and are ready to step into a life of authenticity, courage, & self-compassion.
• Hello Remarkable Woman, do you know your story matters but don't know how to tell it yet? Join The Storytellers Club, a free, private community hub to discover the power hidden in your story through creativity & connection.

In this episode, host Dr Connie Kerali interviews Faith Aisien-Ezugwu, author of the poetry and spoken word book 'I Am Here' and host of the 'Re: Series' podcast. Faith shares her journey from growing up in Nigeria and overcoming feelings of inadequacy and being labeled a 'failure' as a child, to her successful career in business and events management. She discusses her struggles with dyslexia, the emotional challenges she faced, and how therapy helped her find self-compassion and self-worth. Faith offers advice to listeners on believing in themselves, recognising their strengths, and seeking the support they need. She also reflects on the importance of discussing mental health issues and breaking cultural stigmas. The episode concludes with a powerful reading from her book, 'I Am Here'.

01:23 Meet Faith Aisien-Ezugwu

02:34 Chapter One Poem

05:07 Childhood and Culture

09:22 Dyslexia and Self Work

12:59 Writing the Book

15:30 Advice to Younger Self

18:10 Mentoring and Hard Work

20:29 Parenting and Breaking Silence

24:09 Therapy and Self Compassion

27:01 Remarkable Women Inspiration

29:56 Final Reading and Wrap Up

FAITH AISIEN-EZUGWU

Website: FaithAisienEzugwu.com

Instagram: @inkwellfaith

Podcast: The Re: Series

GET IN TOUCH

• Join the community:
• @DrConnieKerali on Instagram
• Sign up for my Born Worthy newsletter to get your weekly dose of empowerment.
• Are you ready to break free from the shame that keeps you stuck? My free, on-demand, Shame Resilience Workshop is for Remarkable Women who are tired of hiding parts of themselves and are ready to step into a life of authenticity, courage, & self-compassion.
• Hello Remarkable Woman, do you know your story matters but don't know how to tell it yet? Join The Storytellers Club, a free, private community hub to discover the power hidden in your story through creativity & connection.

In this week's episode, Dr Connie Kerali interviews Emily Silva Hockstra, a five-time author and spiritual life coach. Emily shares her journey from an anxiety-ridden child to a successful author and coach. She discusses her personal experiences, including suffering a miscarriage at 18, transitioning from a corporate career to wine tasting, and eventually pursuing her passion for writing full-time. Emily delves into the profound impact of grief and shame on her life after a diagnosis of primary ovarian insufficiency meant that she was unable to conceive, detailing how therapy, yoga, and self-discovery have been crucial in her healing journey. She also talks about the creation of her books, such as 'Moonlight Gratitude' and 'Sunset Gratitude,' and emphasises the importance of seeking help and finding inner peace. The episode closes with Emily reflecting on her sources of inspiration and offering advice for those navigating their own struggles.

01:06 Meet Emily Silva Hockstra

02:09 Chapter One: Origins

03:10 Corporate to Wine Life

05:27 Quitting to Create

06:04 Life Coaching Begins

07:04 First Book Breakthrough

08:52 Building the Book Series

10:29 POI Diagnosis and Grief

13:49 Day to Day Shame Spiral

15:42 Therapy and Body Healing

18:48 Vulnerability Takeaways

20:36 Advice for Listeners

22:14 Unpacking Shame Stories

23:50 Coaching After Grief

25:46 Stay Connected Online

26:10 Final Reflections

27:35 Remarkable Woman Tribute

EMILY SILVA HOCKSTRA

• Instagran: @SoulsAdventures
• Website: SoulsAdventures.com

GET IN TOUCH

• Join the community:
• @DrConnieKerali on Instagram
• Sign up for my Born Worthy newsletter to get your weekly dose of empowerment.
• Are you ready to break free from the shame that keeps you stuck? My free, on-demand, Shame Resilience Workshop is for Remarkable Women who are tired of hiding parts of themselves and are ready to step into a life of authenticity, courage, & self-compassion.
• Hello Remarkable Woman, do you know your story matters but don't know how to tell it yet? Join The Storytellers Club, a free, private community hub to discover the power hidden in your story through creativity & connection.

In this week's episode of Speak Shame, Dr Connie Kerali interviews Dr. Adia Gooden, a licensed clinical psychologist and expert on self-worth, self-compassion, and mental health. Dr. Adia shares her journey from growing up in Pasadena, California with professional parents, to becoming a renowned psychologist and speaker. She delves into the impact of early life challenges on her sensitivity to others' feelings, and how her academic and personal struggles with worthiness guided her career choice. Dr. Adia and Dr Connie discuss the importance of understanding self-worth stories, practicing self-compassion, and the layers of performance and vulnerability. Dr. Adia also opens up about her personal experiences with shame and depression, emphasising the need to reconnect with one's unconditional self-worth. The episode concludes with practical steps for listeners to begin their journey towards self-worth and self-compassion, along with a tribute to Dr. Adia's inspiring grandmother.

01:20 Introducing Dr Adia Gooden

02:53 Chapter One: Pasadena Roots

03:29 Early Seeds of Self Doubt

05:29 Why She Became a Psychologist

09:12 Chasing Worth Through Achievement

12:31 Rewrite Your Self Worth Stories

15:27 The Masks We Wear

17:56 First Steps Into Vulnerability

21:48 Four Steps of Self Compassion

25:42 A Shame Story and Healing

29:17 Unconditional Self Worth Defined

31:16 How to Work With Dr Adia

32:43 Remarkable Woman: Nana Tribute

DR. ADIA GOODEN

• Email: [email protected]
• Website: DrAdiaGooden.com

GET IN TOUCH

• Join the community:
• @DrConnieKerali on Instagram
• Sign up for my Born Worthy newsletter to get your weekly dose of empowerment.
• Are you ready to break free from the shame that keeps you stuck? My free, on-demand, Shame Resilience Workshop is for Remarkable Women who are tired of hiding parts of themselves and are ready to step into a life of authenticity, courage, & self-compassion.
• Hello Remarkable Woman, do you know your story matters but don't know how to tell it yet? Join The Storytellers Club, a free, private community hub to discover the power hidden in your story through creativity & connection.