Stack'n'Days: Sober Journeys from Black, Brown and other voices of color.

Loved ones play such a huge role in recovery with Ray and guests often speaking about the impact this had on their sobriety journeys. Well today in this special episode of Stack'n'Days, Ray is joined by his wife Eva. They share candid insights into their journey of love, struggle, and growth, shedding light on the complexities of navigating sobriety as a couple within BIPOC communities.

Early Days and Intertwined Drinking

Ray and Eva reminisce about the early stages of their relationship, where alcohol played a central role. They fondly recall the moments of laughter and connection, yet recognize how heavily drinking was intertwined with those memories.

Recognizing the Problem

Eva bravely shares her realization that Ray's drinking was problematic, acknowledging the challenges she faced in trying to support him. Their conversation unveils the burden partners of alcoholics often bear in managing and monitoring their loved one's drinking, highlighting the emotional toll it takes.

Loss and Growth

Both Ray and Eva reflect on the loss of certain aspects of their relationship that were linked to alcohol. They openly discuss the challenges and rewards of Ray's journey towards sobriety, emphasizing that it's an ongoing process requiring self-reflection and addressing various life areas.

Coping Mechanisms and Emotional Honesty

Ray and Eva delve into the role of alcohol as a coping mechanism and how sobriety has allowed Ray to confront his emotions more honestly. They explore the intricacies of navigating sobriety within a relationship, acknowledging the friction and misunderstandings it can cause.

Living Intentionally and Finding Strength

They highlight the importance of living intentionally. Ray and Eva emphasize the need for internal strength and peace, highlighting the transformative power of honest self-reflection and growth.

Support and Gratitude

Ray and Eva express gratitude for their journey of growth and evolution. They underscore the significance of creating a safe, non-judgmental environment to support a loved one in recovery and the importance of honest conversations with yourself and each other.

Connect with the show

Website:⁠ ⁠⁠https://www.stackndays.com/⁠⁠⁠ 

Apply to be a guest:⁠ ⁠⁠https://www.stackndays.com/rsvp-1⁠⁠⁠ 

Instagram and Tiktok: @stackndays 

YouTube:⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCC-IqvFJ2SlufC6KuyiztjQ⁠⁠⁠

Resources

⁠⁠⁠https://www.samhsa.gov/⁠⁠⁠ 

⁠⁠⁠https://www.joinreframeapp.com/⁠⁠⁠ 

⁠⁠⁠https://www.theluckiestclub.com/⁠⁠⁠ 

⁠⁠⁠https://www.aa.org/⁠⁠⁠ 

Add Stack’n’days to your calendar: 

⁠https://id.podcal.app/1668847465.ics⁠

Instructions:

Apple Calendar (iOS): Click “Calendars” > “Add Calendar” > “Add Subscription Calendar,” then provide the URL above Apple Calendar (macOS): File > “New Calendar Subscription,” then provide the URL above. 

Google Calendar: Go to ⁠calendar.google.com⁠ > “Other calendars” > “+” > “From URL,” then provide the URL above

Creator of Sober Girls Houston Danay Jones joins Ray to talk about the importance of community in recovery, having role models of color, her bipolar diagnosis and how her life has changed for the better since quitting drinking. Her story is a testament to the transformative power of sobriety and self-discovery.

Danay’s Toolkit

Danay's Journey with Alcohol

Danay opens up about her early experiences with alcohol, starting at a young age due to loneliness and seeking connection. Moving to a big city intensified her destructive path, leading to arrests, mental health struggles, and a decade-long battle with addiction. The turning point came during the COVID-19 lockdown, prompting Danay to confront her drinking habits and make a life-changing decision on May 10th, 2020, marking her sobriety date.

Overcoming Shame and Embracing Recovery

Through therapy and self-reflection, Danay addresses the shame and guilt associated with her actions under the influence. She emphasizes the importance of self-love, understanding her true self, and setting goals to navigate the recovery journey successfully.

Creating Sober Girls Houston

Danay's initiative, Sober Girls, aims to provide a supportive and inclusive space for women in sobriety or exploring sobriety. Danay wants to reshape the narrative around socializing, showing that alcohol isn’t necessary for creating connections.

Challenging Recovery Misconceptions

Danay challenges misconceptions around recovery, highlighting the diversity of paths to sobriety and the significance of individualized approaches. She advocates for destigmatizing medicated-assisted treatments and embracing a holistic view of addiction recovery.

The Power of Sobriety

Danay reflects on the empowering transformation sobriety has brought to her life, emphasizing the newfound confidence, clarity, and purpose she experiences daily. She shares insights on recognizing signs of struggle, breaking the cycle of isolation, and supporting loved ones through their recovery journey.

Danay’s details: 

Instagram: @randomly_rude and @Sobergirlshtx

Website: www.sobergirlshouston.com 

Connect with the show

Website:⁠ ⁠⁠https://www.stackndays.com/⁠⁠⁠ 

Apply to be a guest:⁠ ⁠⁠https://www.stackndays.com/rsvp-1⁠⁠⁠ 

Instagram and Tiktok: @stackndays 

YouTube:⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCC-IqvFJ2SlufC6KuyiztjQ⁠⁠⁠

Resources

⁠⁠⁠https://www.samhsa.gov/⁠⁠⁠ 

⁠⁠⁠https://www.joinreframeapp.com/⁠⁠⁠ 

⁠⁠⁠https://www.theluckiestclub.com/⁠⁠⁠ 

⁠⁠⁠https://www.aa.org/⁠⁠⁠ 

Add Stack’n’days to your calendar: 

⁠https://id.podcal.app/1668847465.ics⁠

Instructions:

Apple Calendar (iOS): Click “Calendars” > “Add Calendar” > “Add Subscription Calendar,” then provide the URL above Apple Calendar (macOS): File > “New Calendar Subscription,” then provide the URL above. 
Google Calendar: Go to ⁠calendar.google.com⁠ > “Other calendars” > “+” > “From URL,” then provide the URL above

Vasavi Kumar is an author, podcaster, TV host, group coach, therapist, entrepreneur, and lifestyle expert. She shares her personal journey of recovery and growth, offering valuable insights and tools for speaking one's truth out loud. This episode features a deep dive into Vasavi’s sobriety journey and self-love experience.

This is the Stack’n’Days podcast, a platform that highlights underrepresented journeys of sobriety, growth, and well-being for BIPOC communities hosted by Ray Donovan.

Vasavi's Sobriety Journey 

Vasavi opens up about her first encounter with alcohol at a young age of 12, leading to a tumultuous relationship with substances in her 30s. She candidly shares her struggles with addiction, particularly to cocaine, and the pivotal moments that led her to seek help and embark on a path to sobriety.

Turning Point in Recovery

Vasavi reflects on the turning points in her recovery journey, highlighting the moments that compelled her to seek help and end the chaos. She emphasizes the importance of self-realization and the decision to prioritize self-love and well-being.

Tools for Self-Love and Growth

Drawing from her personal and professional experience, Vasavi offers valuable insights on cultivating self-love and creating a safe space for honest conversations with yourself. She emphasizes the power of speaking your truth out loud, challenging negative self-talk, and building a supportive environment for personal growth.

Creating a Safe Space

Vasavi discusses the significance of creating a safe environment for yourself, free from external validation and toxic influences. She shares the importance of cultivating inner safety and authenticity, which ultimately leads to healthier relationships and personal empowerment.

Embracing Vulnerability

Vasavi encourages listeners to embrace vulnerability and authenticity, emphasizing the strength in seeking help and sharing struggles with trusted individuals. She highlights the importance of open communication and self-compassion in navigating challenges and fostering personal growth.

Looking Ahead

Vasavi shares her aspirations for a fulfilling and balanced life, including a focus on self-love, healthy relationships, and continued personal development. She emphasizes the importance of setting boundaries, prioritizing self-care, and staying true to her own values.

Vasavi’s Details

Website: https://vasavikumar.com/ 

Book: https://vasavikumar.com/orderthebook 

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/mynameisvasavi/ 

Connect with the show

Website:⁠ ⁠⁠https://www.stackndays.com/⁠⁠⁠ 

Apply to be a guest:⁠ ⁠⁠https://www.stackndays.com/rsvp-1⁠⁠⁠ 

Instagram and Tiktok: @stackndays 

YouTube:⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCC-IqvFJ2SlufC6KuyiztjQ⁠⁠⁠

Resources

⁠⁠⁠https://www.samhsa.gov/⁠⁠⁠ 

⁠⁠⁠https://www.joinreframeapp.com/⁠⁠⁠ 

⁠⁠⁠https://www.theluckiestclub.com/⁠⁠⁠ 

⁠⁠⁠https://www.aa.org/⁠⁠⁠ 

Add Stack’n’days to your calendar: 

⁠https://id.podcal.app/1668847465.ics⁠

Instructions:

Apple Calendar (iOS): Click “Calendars” > “Add Calendar” > “Add Subscription Calendar,” then provide the URL above Apple Calendar (macOS): File > “New Calendar Subscription,” then provide the URL above. 

Google Calendar: Go to ⁠calendar.google.com⁠ > “Other calendars” > “+” > “From URL,” then provide the URL above

Jamil, a first-generation American, opens up about his struggles with alcoholism and the pivotal moments that led him to seek help. He discusses his childhood with an alcoholic father, his career in law enforcement, the different things his family tried to do to help him, almost dying from alcohol abuse and his path to recovery.  

Jamil’s Toolkit

Early Life and Family Background

Jamil reflects on his upbringing as the youngest of four siblings in a family where alcoholism was prevalent. He shares vivid memories of his father's struggles with alcohol and the impact it had on his childhood.

Jamil recounts traumatic incidents, including a car accident caused by his intoxicated father, and the subsequent passing of his father due to cancer. 

Journey to Sobriety

After facing multiple challenges and setbacks, including a DUI and suspension from work, Jamil reaches a breaking point. He describes his desperate desire to change his life and seek help for his alcohol addiction.

Jamil's journey to sobriety includes multiple attempts at treatment, relapses, and encounters with fellow members of Alcoholics Anonymous. He highlights the pivotal role of a sponsor in guiding him towards recovery.

Challenges and Triumphs

Despite facing obstacles and setbacks, Jamil perseveres in his quest for sobriety. He shares the struggles of reentering the workforce and finding his place in society as a recovering alcoholic.

Jamil emphasizes the importance of perseverance, humility, and seeking support from others. He shares his aspirations for the future and his commitment to helping others on their path to recovery.

Jamil’s details

@copturnsentrepreneur

Connect with the show

Website:⁠ ⁠⁠https://www.stackndays.com/⁠⁠⁠ 

Apply to be a guest:⁠ ⁠⁠https://www.stackndays.com/rsvp-1⁠⁠⁠ 

Instagram and Tiktok: @stackndays 

YouTube:⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCC-IqvFJ2SlufC6KuyiztjQ⁠⁠⁠

Resources

⁠⁠⁠https://www.samhsa.gov/⁠⁠⁠ 

⁠⁠⁠https://www.joinreframeapp.com/⁠⁠⁠ 

⁠⁠⁠https://www.theluckiestclub.com/⁠⁠⁠ 

⁠⁠⁠https://www.aa.org/⁠⁠⁠ 

Add Stack’n’days to your calendar: 

⁠https://id.podcal.app/1668847465.ics⁠

Instructions:

Apple Calendar (iOS): Click “Calendars” > “Add Calendar” > “Add Subscription Calendar,” then provide the URL above Apple Calendar (macOS): File > “New Calendar Subscription,” then provide the URL above. 

Google Calendar: Go to ⁠calendar.google.com⁠ > “Other calendars” > “+” > “From URL,” then provide the URL above

Ahead of this International Women’s Day host Ray Donovan is joined by Sweta Sansara, who shares her personal story of overcoming alcohol addiction and sugar addiction. Sweta sheds light on her experience growing up as a Nepalese immigrant in the US, feeling like she didn't fit in, an eating disorder, alcohol addiction, being in the US Marines and eventually finding out her body metabolizes sugar into alcohol meaning she had to quit sugar too in her path to sobriety.  

Sweta’s Toolkit:

Sweta's Journey with Alcohol and Food Addiction

Sweta opens up about her family history of alcoholism and how she started drinking at a young age. She shares how alcohol became a coping mechanism for her childhood trauma and struggles with fitting in due to cultural differences. Sweta also delves into her co-occurring eating disorder, highlighting the vicious cycle of using food and alcohol to numb her emotions.

Joining the Marines and Struggles with Addiction

Sweta recounts her decision to join the Marines as a way to overcome her addictions but ultimately faced challenges with drinking on the job and developing physical issues due to her lifestyle. Despite her efforts, Sweta's addiction continued, leading to a downward spiral.

Finding Sobriety and Then Learning About the Sugar Problem

After hitting rock bottom, Sweta sought help and found sobriety through addiction counseling. Five years later she discovered that her body was metabolizing sugar into alcohol and had to go through the process of giving up sugar. She says that this was much harder than giving up alcohol. She shares her journey of surrendering to a higher power and making significant lifestyle changes to break free from the cycle of addiction.

Family Dynamics and Cultural Stigma

Sweta reflects on the challenges of discussing addiction within her South Asian family and the cultural norms that influence their perceptions. She emphasizes the importance of setting boundaries and being an example for the next generation to break the cycle of addiction.

Sweta’s details 

Instagram: @sweta

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@SwetaSansara 

Connect with the show

Website:⁠ ⁠⁠https://www.stackndays.com/⁠⁠⁠ 

Apply to be a guest:⁠ ⁠⁠https://www.stackndays.com/rsvp-1⁠⁠⁠ 

Instagram and Tiktok: @stackndays 

YouTube:⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCC-IqvFJ2SlufC6KuyiztjQ⁠⁠⁠

Resources

⁠⁠⁠https://www.samhsa.gov/⁠⁠⁠ 

⁠⁠⁠https://www.joinreframeapp.com/⁠⁠⁠ 

⁠⁠⁠https://www.theluckiestclub.com/⁠⁠⁠ 

⁠⁠⁠https://www.aa.org/⁠⁠⁠ 

Add Stack’n’days to your calendar: 

⁠https://id.podcal.app/1668847465.ics⁠

Instructions:

Apple Calendar (iOS): Click “Calendars” > “Add Calendar” > “Add Subscription Calendar,” then provide the URL above Apple Calendar (macOS): File > “New Calendar Subscription,” then provide the URL above. 

Google Calendar: Go to ⁠calendar.google.com⁠ > “Other calendars” > “+” > “From URL,” then provide the URL above

In this episode Ray welcomes Miles Orman. Miles opens up about his struggles with alcohol and addiction, shedding light on his past experiences and how he found his way to recovery. He discusses generational alcohol abuse, being a high functioning alcoholic, holistic healing and the importance of community in healing.

Miles’ Toolkit 

Early Life and Influence

Miles shares how his relationship with alcohol was influenced by his mother's struggles with alcohol abuse and addiction. Growing up in a chaotic environment, he witnessed the negative impact of alcohol, which initially deterred him from drinking during his high school years.

College Experience

Upon entering college on a basketball scholarship, Miles was exposed to the party scene and binge drinking culture. This shift in environment led him to lose focus on his goals, affecting his performance on the court and in the classroom.

Transition to Adulthood

After college, Miles continued his binge drinking habits, eventually leading to a daily consumption of alcohol and the introduction of other substances. The pressures of adulthood, coupled with personal struggles, further fueled his addiction.

Turning Point

Miles discusses his decision to relocate to Florida, which served as a catalyst for change in his life. Through personal development, meditation, and physical fitness, he began to rebuild his life and work towards sobriety.

Finding Purpose

As Miles embarked on his journey to recovery, he discovered a passion for coaching and helping others. By sharing his story and creating a platform for mindfulness and self-awareness, he found a sense of purpose in guiding individuals towards a better life.

Reflection on Family

Miles reflects on his relationship with his mother and the impact of her addiction on their family dynamic. Despite the challenges, he acknowledges the importance of compassion and understanding in healing past wounds.

Advice for Others

Miles emphasizes the significance of seeking support and community when facing addiction. He encourages individuals to reach out for help, embrace patience, and believe in the possibility of change.

Miles’ details 

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/miles.orman/?hl=en 

Tiktok: https://www.tiktok.com/@miles_orman 

Connect with the show

Website:⁠ ⁠⁠https://www.stackndays.com/⁠⁠⁠ 

Apply to be a guest:⁠ ⁠⁠https://www.stackndays.com/rsvp-1⁠⁠⁠ 

Instagram and Tiktok: @stackndays 

YouTube:⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCC-IqvFJ2SlufC6KuyiztjQ⁠⁠⁠

Resources

⁠⁠⁠https://www.samhsa.gov/⁠⁠⁠ 

⁠⁠⁠https://www.joinreframeapp.com/⁠⁠⁠ 

⁠⁠⁠https://www.theluckiestclub.com/⁠⁠⁠ 

⁠⁠⁠https://www.aa.org/⁠⁠⁠ 

Add Stack’n’days to your calendar: 

⁠https://id.podcal.app/1668847465.ics⁠

Instructions:

Apple Calendar (iOS): Click “Calendars” > “Add Calendar” > “Add Subscription Calendar,” then provide the URL above Apple Calendar (macOS): File > “New Calendar Subscription,” then provide the URL above. 

Google Calendar: Go to ⁠calendar.google.com⁠ > “Other calendars” > “+” > “From URL,” then provide the URL above

Childhood sexual abuse, undiagnosed bipolar disorder, a teenage preganancy, postpartum depression, a turbulent home life and losing a number of loved ones were all challenges Ami Hall faced in her early life. Alcohol and drugs offered her an escape from all of these things as Ami didn’t have the coping skills or a support network to help her out. 

She speaks openly and honestly with Ray about her journey, sharing things that have helped her and offering hope that there is another way to process difficult situations and emotions. 

Tools That Helped Ami Get Sober And Stay Sober

Early Life 

Ami opens up about some of the struggles she faced in her early life. She reveals that her curiosity with drugs began in her teens, after she experienced sexual assault at the age of 10 and needed something to help her cope. Ami explains that she kept the assault to herself as she didn’t feel like she had anyone to talk to about it. 

She began drinking heavily and using Xanax to cope with her postpartum depression after giving birth at 19. Ami describes how alcohol provided her with a sense of freedom and helped her disconnect from her painful experiences and anxiety. She also mentions that working in the restaurant industry, where alcohol was prevalent, normalized her drinking habits.

Turning Point

The turning point in Ami's journey came when she experienced a mental breakdown in 2016 and was diagnosed with bipolar disorder. She spent time in a mental hospital and realized that she needed to make a change in her life. However, it took several attempts before Ami fully committed to sobriety. She finally decided to stop drinking in May 2021 after leaving a toxic relationship.

Therapy and Other Tools For Sobriety

Ami emphasizes the importance of therapy and self-reflection in her recovery. She started journaling and being honest with herself about her emotions and past traumas. Ami also found support in her hula hoop dancing community, where she connected with others who were on their own sobriety journeys. She started teaching hoop classes and workshops, using her platform to share her story and inspire others in their recovery journeys.

Advice for Anyone Struggling 

Ami encourages anyone struggling with addiction to reach out for support, whether it's from friends, online communities, or therapy. She emphasizes the importance of being honest with oneself and finding healthy coping mechanisms. Ami's story serves as a reminder that recovery is possible and that there is a community of people ready to offer support and understanding.

Connect with Ami

Ami's website: Amielevated.com

Ami's Instagram: @elevated_anh

Ami's Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/ahallphotographyx/ 

Elevated Arts and Healing podcast: https://open.spotify.com/show/544tE14OpJNrk2wj7qt6qO?si=a68a39eb94b544ba 

Connect with the show

Website:⁠ ⁠⁠https://www.stackndays.com/⁠⁠⁠ 

Apply to be a guest:⁠ ⁠⁠https://www.stackndays.com/rsvp-1⁠⁠⁠ 

Instagram and Tiktok: @stackndays 

YouTube:⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCC-IqvFJ2SlufC6KuyiztjQ⁠⁠⁠

Resources

⁠⁠⁠https://www.samhsa.gov/⁠⁠⁠ 

⁠⁠⁠https://www.joinreframeapp.com/⁠⁠⁠ 

⁠⁠⁠https://www.theluckiestclub.com/⁠⁠⁠ 

⁠⁠⁠https://www.aa.org/⁠⁠⁠ 

Add Stack’n’days to your calendar: 

⁠https://id.podcal.app/1668847465.ics⁠

Instructions:

Apple Calendar (iOS): Click “Calendars” > “Add Calendar” > “Add Subscription Calendar,” then provide the URL above Apple Calendar (macOS): File > “New Calendar Subscription,” then provide the URL above. 

Google Calendar: Go to ⁠calendar.google.com⁠ > “Other calendars” > “+” > “From URL,” then provide the URL above

After 27 years of sobriety Tammi Scott has definitely learned a few things. She shares her experience and advice with Ray in this week’s Stack’n’Days podcast. She talks about her journey from being a single mother of three to getting sober in a 12 step program, from connecting with herself through yoga to becoming a teacher and a mentor in the sobriety space and eventually comin home to herself. Throughout the episode she talks about her experience as a black woman in the US and this ties in with her journey. 

Tammi’s Toolkit:

The Early Struggles

Tammi opens up about her early days as a single mother of three, using alcohol and drugs to cope. Overwhelmed and internally struggling, it took a therapist's insight to link her substance use with her depression, sparking the beginning of her self-discovery journey.

The 12-Step Program

Tammi shares her journey into the transformative 12-step program, underscoring its pivotal role in her recovery. Her first AA meeting marked a turning point, providing a sense of community and resonant stories. Tammi stresses the importance of supportive communities and mentors in the recovery process.

Holistic Healing

As Tammi progressed in recovery, she explored holistic healing modalities like yoga and writing. These practices deepened her self-understanding and offered comfort and grounding. Tammi emphasizes the significance of self-compassion and cultivating kindness towards oneself.

Ongoing Growth

Throughout the episode, Tammi acknowledges that recovery is an ongoing process. She urges mindfulness against complacency and emphasizes prioritizing sobriety, even during stable periods.

Healing as a Woman of Color

Tammi's experience as a woman of color has had a significant impact on her journey of recovery. Throughout her early days of sobriety, she faced the double-edged sword of being a person of color in predominantly white spaces. She felt the weight of societal expectations and the lack of support for women of color in professional settings. This added layer of complexity made it challenging for Tammi to fully express herself and find her place in the recovery community. Additionally, the racial injustices and violence against people of color deeply affected her, but she struggled to find understanding and empathy within the 12-step community. Despite these obstacles, Tammi has persevered and found her own path to healing and self-discovery, embracing her identity as a black woman and using her experiences to uplift and support others.

Current Involvements

Tammi is actively involved in facilitating sober support community meetings and co-teaching online sober courses both at The Luckiest Club. Her passion lies in sharing experiences and assisting others in their recovery journeys. Tammi plans to teach yoga, focusing on heart-centered work and creating spaces for healing and self-discovery.

Tammi’s details

Instagram: @QueenieT_

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/alwayseverinward?mibextid=ZbWKwL 

Connect with the show

Website:⁠ ⁠⁠https://www.stackndays.com/⁠⁠⁠ 

Apply to be a guest:⁠ ⁠⁠https://www.stackndays.com/rsvp-1⁠⁠⁠ 

Instagram and Tiktok: @stackndays 

YouTube:⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCC-IqvFJ2SlufC6KuyiztjQ⁠⁠⁠

Resources

⁠⁠⁠https://www.samhsa.gov/⁠⁠⁠ 

⁠⁠⁠https://www.joinreframeapp.com/⁠⁠⁠ 

⁠⁠⁠https://www.theluckiestclub.com/⁠⁠⁠ 

⁠⁠⁠https://www.aa.org/⁠⁠⁠ 

Add Stack’n’days to your calendar: 

⁠https://id.podcal.app/1668847465.ics⁠

Instructions:

Apple Calendar (iOS): Click “Calendars” > “Add Calendar” > “Add Subscription Calendar,” then provide the URL above Apple Calendar (macOS): File > “New Calendar Subscription,” then provide the URL above. 

Google Calendar: Go to ⁠calendar.google.com⁠ > “Other calendars” > “+” > “From URL,” then provide the URL above