So many of us have misconceptions about radiation based on past experiences from several years ago to what we conjure up in our minds. This is often because we have heard bits and pieces of stories around radiation and we've developed our own mythology on what it is and what it is like to go through. 

Track Pete's journey through radiation as he walks us through each step of his treatment. 

Our minds can assign images and ideas  to radiation: "Ride the Lightning" was a description Pete conjured up.  He thought it would radiation would bring burning, sizzling, extreme pain, and sickness in one of the most sensitive parts of his body. 

He found out that I was wrong and right on some things, but that his entire idea of what radiation was...was way off! 

In this episode, we relate to Kate Bowler's telling of how she had to admit that she did not how to do this: Live with life as a chronic condition. 

She gives this beautiful illustration of hikers on the Appalachian Trail and the advice she was given by them that really helped her. 

Shara (Pete's wife and caregiver) and Pete (cancer fighter) share their very fresh (this week) experience with uncertainty and a climbing cancer number even when radiation was to reduce that number significantly. Dealing with life as a chronic condition is daily and they share how we can do so by laying things down, giving them up, and as a result allowing themselves to be...human. 

The self-help and prosperity gospel culture of our day often leads us to toxic positivity. Toxic Positivity is when we feel we must turn everything we are going through into a positive. Often this approach is aided with some system of trying to will positivity into being. But, when you've been diagnosed with cancer, or you are a care giver fighting alongside your fighter, it is so important that we allow ourselves to be human. It is okay to be angry, it is okay to feel depressed and defeated, it is okay to be confused about life...in fact, it is not just okay - it is HUMAN. It's also okay to accept the fact that there's a strong percentage chance that you might die of the disease you have and rather than try to mask the pain that causes you because of the deep, beautiful relationships you have, you can accept your own mortality and then, in faith, find your crew of loved ones and all push for hope despite that reality.  Hope is one thing that can be present in your anger, in your fear, in your sadness. It's not positivity. It's not spinning it the right way. Hope is looking at our Father and completely giving him everything. You don't have to sort it, understand it, love it, jump up and down about it...just be human...that's how he made you and that's how he loves you. 

Listen to Shara Heiniger (caregiver) and Pete Heiniger (cancer fighter) as they further discuss good communication strategies for a cancer journey. 

So many times caregivers are motivated out of a love for the cancer fighter and a strong desire to help and serve. They often will take on some duties that use to fall on the cancer fighter. But, what often happens is the cancer fighter can see this not as help, but they translate is as they are helpless or useless. 

As is the case in most things, neither party is wrong in what they are feeling and doing. Listen and hear how Shara and Pete learned how to work through this common "first" on their cancer journey. 

We’re pumped because this is our #2 Podcast for Stages!  Where we’re working hard to not only be a voice for cancer fighters, but also add the perspective of the spouse and caregiver. 

This week, as promised, we want to launch into a few episodes called “She Said...He Heard.”  

So, our subject is really communication!  Wow, I know in our cancer journey, our communication had to change substantially. Not just from how we communicated, but also away from some of the “encouraged” ways of communication by professionals who counsel couples.

Honesty is important in relationship, but when you start a cancer journey, then the cancer fighter and his/her spouse or loved one often have to stretch that a bit. Sometimes it all depends on timing. When you 'tell all" matters. 

This is our very first Stages Podcast episode and we’re pretty excited about it. I am excited, because I believe it adds a perspective that is often overlooked. We can hear a lot about cancer fighters and chemo and the battle, but we don’t often hear from the caregivers side of things. 

Caregivers face their own battle that is part fighting alongside their spouse or loved one, but it’s also staring their own elephants down that are different than the ones a cancer fighter like myself faces. So, I’m excited for you to hear Shara’s (a caregiver and spouse of a cancer fighter) perspective as well.