Hello there! Welcome to The Shuffle Galaxy and our exploration of one of the worst franchise trilogies from the 2000s. Forget everything you know about storytelling fundamentals: characters, acts, arcs, emotions, and nuance—throw it right in the trash compactor– because in the child-like mind of George Lucas, what makes a movie great is an over-the-top third act CGI battle scene on whatever backdrop most resembles your childhood living room floor. George Lucas’s nine-hour monstrosity has so much wrong with it and we do our best to add to the  immense collection of existing criticism. En route, we discuss the trilogy’s lack of real characters, the films’ idiosyncratic style, and the total lack of any interesting themes. We also discuss the trilogy’s Pandora’s Box-like effect on movie making for the next twenty years and the toy and video-game tie-in products that were, honestly, pretty sick.