Starting 5

Peanut, the Creator drops by for another edition of the Shaft Draft. We talk nostalgia and spend almost no time on the goldmine of Star Wars and Marvel. We talk about all of Stitch's brethren, the unpicked members of the Recess Gang, the true star of Phineas and Ferb, an awful lot of ducks, and so much more. When the dust settles, we form a Shaft Draft starting five that would do pretty well for itself.

Kenny Jay steps into the octagon to square off against Dillon in the final matchup of the first round of Disney. With Chase as the much-needed voice of reason, the boyz wade through the dangerous waters of DIsney XD's Marvel properties. Featured in this ep: size, a triangle, a couple of intergalactic dictators, a playground vigilante, a Chris Paul comp, transition scoring, a size 18 and a half shoe, and the glorious and excessive return of the force choke.

In the third matchup of the Disney round, Steven returns to defend his deep Disney run against newcomer Sam, who's broadcasting live from the BnE in my own living room. This episode features a couple of powerful deep cuts, pure chaos, a grumpy uncle, enunciation, and a direct hero/villain face-off. Easily the wildest episode on record.

In the second matchup of the Disney Bracket, newcomer Justin squares off against Commander Cody in yet another all-WCU Alum game. This episode features raw strength, Story Time with Cody, America's favorite secret agent, the power of a thousands winds, the 03-04 Pistons, and a couple of real basketball players.

We kick off the Disney bracket with Peanut, the creator, looking for his first win and the return of a Talkin' Sauce ambassador whose last name is Teabo. Josh takes home the gutsiest pick award, and then manages to top that pick later in the draft. Covered in this episode we've got a couple of characters too small to dribble, more than a few picks that test the rules, a couple of ducks, an actual basketball player, and a debate about childish energy vs adult strength. A flawless start.

The Nickelodeon Final is upon us. Steven and Isaac climb into the octagon in an episode packed with equal parts legitimate basketball tactics and wild hearsay. Covered in this lovely finale: King Boomie is caught smoking in the locker room for not the first time, Po eats some noodles, Jenny the Jet is born, Isaac disses Dame Lillard, Steven gets upset when I compare Tigress to Russell Westbrook, and so, so, so much more.

It's Third Place time again, kids. The Nickelodeon Bracket is coming to a close, and the two teams who didn't make the final (Jacob and Cody) are slugging it out in a game that features not one, but two players who actively do not participate. This bronze medal match also features a conversation about refereeing, the unrelenting will of a scorned princess, the return of Jacob's video capabilities, and a battle of morals.

Canonically, In the second game of the Nickelodeon bracket second round, Steven faces off against Cohost Cody. We discover, canonically, that there is a word we are no longer allowed to say, and it shockingly has nothing to do with the canonically gray area of Nega Chin's name. Please, canonically, forgive us. Aside from a deep dive into the canon, this ep also features semantics, dribbling with a head, some debate over the death of a player, and a lot of faith in the clutch.

In the first game of Nickelodeon's second round, Isaac faces off against Jacob in a fight of primo matchups such as Master Splinter vs Donatello, Princess Azula vs Fire Lord Ozai, and the Body of Evil vs Jorgen Von Strangle. This ep features: inventive defensive tactics involving a whale, a lot of presumed behind-the-scenes training montages, mental warfare, more animals than most episodes, and nowhere near enough of the people who run out and squeegee the floor.

Peanut "the creator" drops by to chat about all the characters who got left out, and the boys form an official Nickelodeon Shaft Draft Starting 5. This episode features: finally some recognition for Gerald, a deep dive into the Fairly Odd Parents, some Rocket Power love, redemption for the last remaining turtle, and a difficult decision to shaft a couple more people.