Steppin' Out Radio

During his fifteen years in professional baseball, "Sudden Sam" McDowell threw hard and partied harder. When he wasn't scheduled to be on the mound the following day, his nights usually ended at 3:00 a.m. or later, sometimes bringing a lump on his head to the game after an impromptu scuffle. Sam had low self-esteem but lived to impress people. Now, clean and sober, he lives to help people. He works with many teams to help players avoid and overcome substance abuse and emotional problems. Hear Sam's inspirational story of triumph and how he's not out to prove anything anymore, finally secure in himself and his beliefs.

Twin Brothers "Z" and "T" are both alcoholics in recovery, who think their first drinks came while they were in the womb, when their mother would drink while pregnant. Both reflect on their lives before entering recovery, scamming friends and associates into providing them with alcohol and eventually drugs. One time they met up with a childhood friend who had become a judge and drinking started smoking marijuana with him, or so they thought. But the judge asked them to meet him later in the day what would turn out to be an AA meeting.

Gary first began gambling at age 13, betting his friend's parents five dollars at a time. He wasn't very lucky, and kept losing. In his teens, he'd bet on sports with bookies, losing paycheck after paycheck. At age 15, he lost hundreds of dollars to bookmakers; he was threatened to come up with the cash. Gary also started drinking, which helped him numb himself to fear of losing money through gambling he could not control. He would soon find himself calling bookies drunk, betting on whatever games were being played that day.

Sam's first gambling came making bets with friends in school. He'd bet his friends he could throw ball farther than they, or he'd flip baseball cards. He soon starting betting his school lunch that his favorite sports teams would win; and sometimes he'd lose and not get to eat. As a teenager, he would bet with his money from his after-school job and lose that as well. As his debts grew but his desire for action continues, he sought money from loansharks.

Kerri thinks her gambling addiction began at age 21, when she first visited a Casino. She never drank, never used drugs, but the act of gambling made her feel high. Her addiction intensified, finding reasons to visit casinos as often as she could. Kerri would often forget to turn the headlights off before running into the gambling halls, only to find her car's battery dead the next morning she finished her betting.

Ron's first gamble came at age 10. Growing up in New York City, he learned how to shoot dice on the street corner at night. But with gambling came lying, as he was making so much money gambling and working for a bookie, that he out-earned his father. After college, he joined an investment firm on Wall Street. His job now involved a sort of gambling, but it wasn't enough for him, and Ron sought out illegal gambling halls. His job paid well and his gambling habit turned out good luck as well. But soon he started visiting the casinos of Atlantic City many nights each week, and wound up in legal trouble when he started covering loses with money his clients gave him to invest.

Ray says alcohol would help he feel better about himself. He never liked his life, even as a child. He learned to drink in his youth, by watching his father and other adults. Even as a senior citizen now, his uncle still sits in his shed and drinks. He got an athletic scholarship to a private prep school but got expelled sophomore year, all related to drinking. His first rehab visit occurred at age 16, as he was not only drinking excessively, but stealing his sick mother's tranquilizers. But his abuse resumed following his departure from the facility. In his late teens, his father set him away to ensure he didn't embarrass the family.

Jason began drinking in high school, like so many others. He and his friends would drink together. His first time getting drunk ended with him getting incredibly sick and vomiting, but he still woke up the next day with an immense desire to do it again. Looking back, he knows alcohol was filling an emotional void; it helped him feel safe and calm. But his drinking would eventually cause him to accept the unacceptable in life. He couldn't hold jobs, his personal relationships ended. He would live in homes riddled with pest problems. At one point, he started sleeping in his bathtub to avoid insects his bedroom that he cared not to get rid of, because of alcohol.

Rachel's first drink came at age eight, and she says that when the booze hit her stomach, it was the most amazing feeling she ever knew. She would sneak drinks, scared that if her parents would find out, they'd take the alcohol away from her. Looking back, Rachel can see she drank to make herself feel comfortable. Rachel's drinking grew out of hand very quickly. By the time she was in college, she was waking up in strange beds and got herself kicked out of drivers' education classes. She became a heavy drunk after college, living in different places overseas doing nothing but drinking. She found herself staying in bed for years, drinking her time away. But Rachel's lowest came when started wetting her bed out of laziness, not wanting to leave her bed.

Shane recalls never fitting in with his community; neither his neighborhood nor even his family. He blames this for acting out as a child. Shane was such a discipline problem that he was switched around to 16 different schools by the time he was 15 years old. But it wasn't until he was away at college that Shane started drinking. He says alcohol gave him confidence and a sense of fun. Shane's life dream was to become an actor, feeling drawn to New York City looking for work but finding wild cast parties instead. In the middle of that stretch, Shane has first experience with sobriety; a woman he was trying to date encouraged him to stop drinking, and he stayed clean for for five years. But Shane knows now that sobriety didn't come from within, and when moving to Los Angeles to find more acting work, he became engrossed in a cocaine-fueled Hollywood life lasting years. His only wake-up call was when he began to beat his girlfriend whose only affront was her attempt to keep the drugs away.