Storied Coaching with Aaron J. Jacobs

Did you know you are a prolific author?

So am I.

We are constantly writing stories in our brains by stringing together thoughts about other people in our lives.

People we work with, people we live with, people we love.

What most people don't realize is that these stories are mostly fiction.

Our stories are based on our limited experiences with the world and that other person.

The good news is that your brain is also a powerful editor.

So if any of your stories about people are causing you pain or frustration, this episode is for you.

Listen in to get clear, actionable steps for editing or completely rewriting your stories about other people.

It's going to make you feel so much better.

3 Key Takeaways

• Learn how to identify unhelpful stories you have about other people
• Learn how to edit or rewrite your stories about other people
• Learn how to ask the other person to participate in rewriting the story and how to turn the story around so you can grow

People talk about "setting boundaries" quite a bit.

I certainly needed to clarify my boundaries at a point in my life. But, I'm much happier now that I'm clear with those around me about what is and is not acceptable to me.

But how do you know when you really need a boundary?

In your personal life, do you feel resentful of the way you are being treated?

Do you feel like you are being taken advantage of in your professional life?

If the answer is yes to either of these questions, you may need to get clear on your boundaries so you can feel better.

I'm going to show you how to get clear on your boundaries and communicate them in an easy, drama-free way.

3 Key Takeaways

• What is and is not a boundary? How to get clear on what your boundaries are.
• How and when to communicate your boundaries.
• How to enforce your boundaries when one is currently or has been crossed

Get the full show notes and more information here:

https://storiedcoaching.com/ep-24-boundaries-how-to-know-when-you-need-one-how-to-set-it-up-and-how-to-enforce-it-without-drama/

This will make saying YES or NO much easier for you and your business.

Many people think saying yes to all the things makes your business grow.

It doesn't.

Getting clear on specifically what to say yes to or no to is the key to growth.

A clear and concise Story Purpose Statement is the key.

Listen in while I tell you exactly how to build your own Story Purpose Statement.

3 Key Takeaways

• You DON'T need to say yes to everything. Knowing exactly what to say no to will save you buckets of indecision and heartache.
• The easy template for writing your own Story Purpose Statement that you can copy.
• Why sharing this Story Purpose Statement with your team will make your life easier.

Get the full show notes and more information here:

https://storiedcoaching.com/ep-23-how-to-inspire-yourself-and-your-team-by-creating-a-story-purpose-statement/

Coincidentally, for episode #22, my wife and I are going on our 22nd anniversary trip. We'll stay in a CASTLE. I wanted to add that to my bucket list just so I could check it off. What can I say? I'm a high performer, an entrepreneur to the core.

In fact, that list-building, high-performing trait is exactly what I want to talk to you about today. My good friend spotted this in me: "Aaron, you're always getting ready to get ready. Just start and adjust as you go." My perfectionist brain did NOT want to hear this. I like to research all of the best possible options.

But since then, I've learned that "getting ready to get ready" is really just wasting time on the wrong steps. So now, I'm going to teach you to identify the areas where YOU do this.

This especially happens for entrepreneurs in the professional space. It's okay if this is something you have to continually work on. But the key is to send out your minimum viable product as early as you can. You can make sure it isn't embarrassing, but GO. START. Maybe it is just B minus work. But then you collect feedback, and move that B minus to a B plus and then to the A zone.

I'll show you how this process will save time AND end in a product better tailored to your audience. It might feel brutal at first to hold yourself to an actionable timeline, but soon, you'll be able to see how getting ready to get ready simply keeps you out of the action, second guessing rather than moving forward.

3 Key Takeaways

• You DON'T need to give your audience a new product that's already the 100% best option. Let them help you to develop it and instead just move forward.
• Hold yourself accountable to how you spend your time. If the activity isn't action-based, it isn't helping in the end.
• Consider your employees and co-workers. As a leader, be SURE you aren't fostering an environment where they'll expect punishment if they don't get it perfect on the first try.

Get the full show notes and more information here:

https://storiedcoaching.com/ep-22-stop-getting-ready-to-get-ready/

Utilizing compassion and kindness will MAGNIFY the positive results in your personal and professional life. You will instantly begin to feel better about your reactions and help others at the same time.

In order to use both properly, it's important to make the distinction between these two closely related ideas. It has to do with emotion and action. Both are needed to get the result you're looking for.

Compassion is about your emotional response to someone else's situation. It reduces cynicism, employing empathy and relatability. This makes you want to help alleviate their suffering, which leads to the second concept. Kindness is very much an action word. It's your response to that feeling of empathy and it can come in different ways.

Emotion and reaction. The two can act like ripples in a pond, but as I will explain to you today, they need to start with you to yourself.

I'll give you a few examples on the show. In short terms: you need to show yourself kindness. Accept that humans get frustrated, that you're human, and then give yourself permission to simply try again. Start noticing those times that you need compassion; be attentive. Then, start looking for ways to spread that to others.

You'll be amazed at what this can do to your relationship with your co-workers, employees, children, and spouse. And don't be surprised when you start to notice all that you are getting in return–without asking.

3 Key Takeaways

• Having compassion for yourself isn't avoiding personal standards. It's accepting that you're human and giving yourself permission to simply try again.
• Use kindness as an action word. If you feel empathy and want to alleviate another's pain, find a way to follow through with that.
• As a leader, you are in a position to extend empathy before frustration to your employees. You've likely been through what they are feeling right now; use that.

Get the full show notes and more information here:

https://storiedcoaching.com/cultivate-compassion-and-kindness-for-better-results

The truth is, I don't feel like talking to you today. I've got a cold. I've got a lot to do. Which is exactly why I am going to talk to you, and about a topic that you and I will continue to feel until we are dead. Today, we're going to talk about dread.

Dread is inevitable. Don't beat yourself up because your brain would rather get that short-term dopamine fix than execute the task ahead of you. That's normal.

There's an important distinction to make about dread, however.

You will feel either the pain of regret or the pain of discipline–pain is there either way. A lot of our pain is psychological because in the moment, it seems so much shorter to choose the easy out.

It's a compound effect. Each time you choose the pain of regret, you're creating your own evidence for why you're not getting what you want and why you should quit. And it gets easier and easier to stop.

See the pattern?

Today, we'll tell your brain this instead: you will accomplish things a lot faster if you just get over this momentary unease. The pleasure of discipline will come, and believe it or not, the dread of doing it will go away within minutes, leading you that much closer to your long-term goal.

3 Key Takeaways

• The pain of regret is not only intense but lasts longer than the pain of discipline. Choose to feel good about how you handled your day over pining about what you should have accomplished.
• Understand that whichever decision you make, feeling pain is inevitable for humans. It's your choice which kind of pain you partake in and what result it brings you.
• Think about your future self. Will they be glad for the bravery you are displaying today by choosing the right path?

Get the full show notes and more information here:

https://storiedcoaching.com/ep-20-choose-your-pain-to-determine-your-results/

Things are getting tighter in the economy. Business owners are hosting budget meeting after budget meeting, focusing on "How can I make more money for the business now?" As entrepreneurs, we've all been subject to that fear.

But the problem with this question is that it encourages a scarcity mindset, removing the most important piece of the equation we can give our clients: value.

So today, I'm going to help you change the way you think from "How can I make more money?" to "How can I provide more value to my clients?" Don't be worried that it will result in lost revenue. This is how we operate at OMH Creative. As I will demonstrate, it will only boost your client relationships and brand morale.

It doesn't need to be super big or expensive. I'll give you 3 simple ways to provide value, starting with questions you can translate to your own company. Present yourself as gracious and generous, and do it from a place of abundance. I promise, there's more than enough to go around.

3 Key Takeaways

• You are in a position to share your knowledge that's simple to you but helpful to others. It doesn't matter if you're in the marketing industry or hairstyling industry.
• Take as little as two times a week to write an email that can provide value to a client. Watch how it acts like magic for your business.
• By providing free value to customers, you're not only showing generosity but training them to be good customers; they now know what quality service looks like, and they know that it's you.

Get the full show notes and more information here:

https://storiedcoaching.com/ep-19-pivot-from-sales-scarcity-to-abundance-by-changing-one-simple-question

Reporting from my Mexico vacation, I am back with another episode of Storied Life Coaching to talk to you about the AMAZING results of living in an intentional free space, even after just 24 hours.

"It's too selfish to take time to be by myself; I have ideas for work that would be left untouched and a family to spend time with." How many times have you convinced yourself a phrase like this was true? I speak from experience when I say that it is all too easy to fall into that line of thinking as entrepreneurs.

For me, it required a kick in the ass from my wife to show me how much anxiety I had about being by myself and accept how healthy it would be for my mind. So I'm going to share some of those things that will help you be able to free your calendar and take out the scarcity mentality around working 24/7.

Take my challenge. Ask: what does your ideal life look like to you? Don't wait around for the stars to align; work toward it in increments. I guarantee you, you'll come up with more ideas, your brain will normalize this, and you will have a moment where you wonder why you waited so long to get around to it.

3 Key Takeaways

• Move activities that interrupt your work flow–even for five minutes. Use a blocking method to take care of that busy work when your time isn't dedicated to innovation.
• When you're in that intentional white space, DON'T act immediately on any new ideas. Keep your brain in a mode of ideation until later, when you've made space for working.
• Making intentional time for your brain to sit and be creative is NOT laziness. It's time to reconstruct your ideology around what is productive and what isn't.

Resources

Tim Ferriss, The Four Hour Workweek

Get the full show notes and more information here:

https://storiedcoaching.com/how-to-start-living-as-your-intended-future-self-right-now

I threw off my episode schedule because I want to tell you about this: my wife just surprised me with an epic father's day gift. She's sending me to Mexico for three days. It's thrilling, of course, but I also noticed that just as she told me. my brain immediately began to worry about whether or not I'd be able to have fun on my current diet, one that restrains the kinds of food and alcohol they typically serve. Which brings me to today's topic:

Our brains seek out easy immediate pleasure–the short-term dopamine levels. But we're also pursuing a long term goal, a change that we want to make in our lives.

So now, our brain is in conflict with itself.

Today, I'm going to show you that there's another part of your brain available to you so you can combat those strong urges to fall off track–whether your goal has to do with your body, work, or your personal life. We're going to use our brain's own weapon against it and combat the strong emotional associations of short-term pleasure with the emotions that come from achieving your long-game goals.

In short, we're going to delay that temporary pleasure to get to the future you that you are SO excited about.

3 Key Takeaways

• Understand that it's natural for your brain to rationalize the reasons you need that short-term pleasure. It's going to tap right into the emotions it remembers from before.
• Your goals for the future will create an emotion so much greater than the little temptations along the way can.
• Use emotion to beat emotion: control the urges to dip into distractions with immediate dopamine by thinking about how you'll feel about achieving your long-game goals.

Get the full show notes and more information here:

https://storiedcoaching.com/short-term-dopamine-vs-big-results/

f you're looking to improve your productivity, business plans, or even your mental health, you'll want to tune into today's episode where I share how I constantly generate ways for my business to tell stories and let my brain "off the leash." You can make intentional space for your brain to do what it does best: generate new ideas out of seemingly unrelated things.

You may be thinking "I don't have ideas. Creativity is not my forte." If you've been following the show, you'll know that EVERYONE is a natural storyteller; it's outside obstacles that get in the way of unlocking that new level in your mind. Understand that trying to force your brain to come out with an idea by a certain deadline will CRUSH your creativity. This is why people's best ideas come out of the shower.

Learn today to create a clutter free space in your brain; it needs the breathing space to be bored. Worry less about optimizing every moment of your time for productivity and instead practice two simple, easy steps with me to become a creative idea-pumping, super brain machine. Be brave enough to try it for two weeks, and watch your thought process transform.

3 Key Takeaways

• Stop saying creativity isn't your forte. EVERYONE is a natural storyteller and can be taught to use it.
• Taking mental space will not only improve the business but also can help to heal personal anxiety.
• Be brave enough to try taking 30 minutes out of two days to meditate or free associate. You'll be amazed at the results.

Get the full show notes and more information here:

https://storiedcoaching.com/how-to-turn-your…ive-idea-machine