Stork'd

Dr. Bendikson is an OB/GYN and a nationally recognized leader in the fertility field. She has gone through fertility testing herself and now counsels clients about family planning decisions like egg freezing and other fertility treatment options. This conversation demystifies the scary and overwhelming aspects of egg freezing and fertility testing. We talk about all the things - fertility age ranges, the quality and number of your eggs, and the technology behind testing. Join us as we talk about how we can become more educated and proactive with our fertility and family planning!

IN THIS EPISODE:

• [03:56] About Dr. Bendikson and her passion for fertility awareness.
• [07:11] The intersection of fertility and culture and navigating difficult conversations around fertility testing.
• [13:48] The egg freezing process explained and answers to common questions.
• [27:11] Technological improvements in egg freezing and the difference of embryo freezing.
• [33:00] Clarifying what fertility testing means for family planning.
• [39:29] Dr. Bendikson's own experience with fertility testing and making decisions based on outliers.

KEY TAKEAWAYS:

• Women in their twenties are encouraged to start thinking about their long-term family planning goals. You don't have to make any decisions but it's helpful to consider fertility testing as a way to learn and understand what your options are as you think about having kids in the future.
• In the last 15 years, there have been advancements that have made the egg freezing experience easier. Improvements to medications have decreased the length of time that women experience being uncomfortable and it's also limited the amount of days of taking shots.
• You can't change the number or quality of your eggs. However, the number thing you can do is choose to freeze your eggs earlier rather than later. If you freeze your eggs in your late 20s and then wait to get pregnant in your late 30s, your chances of getting pregnant are that of your late 20 year old self - so that's really important to remember.

Resources:

https://kindbody.com/

Dr. Bendikson Website

https://instagram.com/drkristinbendikson

https://instagram.com/kindbody

BIO:

Dr. Bendikson did her residency training in OB/GYN at Harvard and completed her reproductive endocrine and infertility fellowship training at Cornell. She is a California native, having graduated from UCLA with honors. After first leaving Los Angeles for NYU Medical School, she finally returned after training to become an assistant professor at the USC Keck School of Medicine.

Dr. Bendikson was a leader at USC Fertility for over a decade. Dr. Bendikson founded the Center for Pregnancy Loss for patients who have suffered from pregnancy loss and miscarriage. Dr. Bendikson also founded the Fertility Diagnostics Program at USC, to provide a way for young adults to better understand their reproductive potential to help them make educated choices for their future.

She is a nationally recognized leader in the fertility field. She has been the Chair of the American Society of Reproductive Medicine's (ASRM) Patient Education Committee since 2016 and serves as a member of the ASRM Practice Committee. She is on the board of the ASRM Early Pregnancy Loss Special Interest group and served as President in 2020. She has been recognized for many years as one of LA's Top Doctors by Los Angeles Magazine.

Today's wonderful guest is Cameron Rogers! Cam has built her career advising high net-worth clients on professional investing and wealth management, and recently made the decision to invest in her future through egg freezing. First off, she shares her thought process behind her choice and the social components that she has faced as a single, career-minded woman. She explains the emotional, physical, and financial investment that fertility preservation requires and talks about how meaningful community was during the process. PS - this is a great episode to listen to if, like me, you have ever felt pressure from others to start a family!

• [04:32] About Cam Rogers and her process leading up to freezing her eggs.
• [16:12] Cultural pressures related to dating, career success and other life choices.
• [19:49] Cameron's egg freezing experience.
• [24:33] Julia's experience with freezing her eggs.
• [26:20] The emotional and financial components of egg freezing.
• [39:00] What does family mean to Cam?

KEY TAKEAWAYS:

• Egg freezing is a physical, financial, and emotional investment in a possible future – one that isn't even defined or a promised future.
• Women often experience hurtful societal pressures from family and friends to be in a relationship or start a family by a certain age. This pressure is usually compounded by a woman's own personal desires for a family which can make egg freezing deeply personal and isolating. In Cameron's experience, she was privileged to have felt and found a supportive community during the process.
• In a perfect world, every young woman in her early twenties would start saving for egg freezing. In a more perfect world, we wouldn't have to because insurance programs would cover it.

Resources:

@camrogers33

https://www.ellevest.com/private-wealth-management/how-were-different

https://instagram.com/ellevest

BIO:

Cameron has built her career advising both high net worth individuals and some of the country's largest institutional investors. At Ellevest, she advises clients around matters including generational transitions of wealth, investing for financial and social impact, and institutional investment strategy. She has more than a decade of professional investing and wealth management experience, most recently at J.P. Morgan. Cameron has degrees in finance and international business from Georgetown University, and is a CFA charterholder. She is a board member for the Beyond Sport Foundation, an organization that celebrates, supports, and provides funding for organizations using sport to help make the UN Sustainable Development Goals (SDGs) a reality. She is also involved with Women for Women International.

Chelsea London Lloyd, a comedian, actress and self proclaimed "grief gal" and I chat about her unique relationship with humor and grief. As a child, she grew up with two sick parents and after a long 15 year journey with ALS, her father passed away. His passing has informed her life's purpose, her art and her podcast, Dying of Laughter. Now as an adult, she has a beautiful, dynamic relationship with grief and helps others who are experiencing loss. In today's episode, we talk about the importance of volunteerism and practical ways to show up for people when they're grieving. We discuss a very important relationship Chelsea has mentoring a child her mother's battle with breast cancer and after her mother passes. We process through the unique challenges that anticipatory grief brings and Chelsea shares some ways that we can better show up for people in the midst of suffering.

• [02:37] Chelsea's introduction.
• [03:55] What is grief and how to find the humor in it?
• [10:15] How children process grief and death and how community plays a part.
• [15:14] How Chelsea and her family navigated the day-to-day of having an illness.
• [19:31] How to show up for a child who needs support.
• [27:41] How and when to show up for someone who is grieving.
• [32:30] Anticipatory grief versus grief that has recently happened.
• [36:19] Chelsea's identity in relation to grief and definition of family.

KEY TAKEAWAYS:

• Grief is the deep emotional response to a circumstance, primarily the loss of someone close to you in the context of death. However, that can be expanded to many other things that you lose in your life, like a loss of relationship, loss of identity, loss of your physical, or in COVID, a loss of connection to human beings.
• I think it's really important for all of us to step into our power in some way in a volunteer space. Most people have the time, but don't realize the value in showing up for others through volunteering.
• Mark the calendar of the anniversary of the loss so that you can reach out one, three, five years later. It can be as simple as checking in and letting that person know you're thinking about them.

Resources:

Kudoboard

The Power of Now by Eckhart Toley

Modern Loss Resources

Experience Camps - Support for Grieving Children

@_ChelsWhoElse_

@dyingoflaughter_podcast

www.ChelsWhoElse.com

BIO:

Chelsea London Lloyd is a comedian & grief activist who uses humor to help people cope with their pain. Lloyd grew up with two sick parents; at age 8 her parents were diagnosed with ALS and breast cancer. Her dad died of ALS when she was 19 and her mom -- who lost her own mother to leukemia at 19 -- currently combats stage 4 metastatic breast cancer which returned after 17 years in remission.

Lloyd volunteers / hosts peer-lead grief groups via The Dinner Party, mentors a 9 year-old girl (whose mom has stage 4 BC) via Walk With Sally, and volunteers at OUR HOUSE: Grief Support via their grief camps and groups.

She spent 2020-2021 producing viral short-form comedic & grief content for BuzzFeed.

Nearly 50% of infertility is a male factor, meaning it's related to men not women. Even with this shocking percentage, it's not openly discussed. In this week's episode, we are speaking with TJ Peyten who has become an advocate for male factor infertility after she and her husband experienced it first hand. TJ shares about her deep longing for motherhood and the differences in how men and women process and grieve in the midst of male infertility. Listen as Julia and TJ have a beautiful conversation about disappointment, infertility awareness, and the miracle of building a family through adoption.

IN THIS EPISODE:

• [02:14] Introduction to TJ and her advocacy for male infertility
• [08:21] Receiving the news of their infertility and their response
• [18:12] How infertility affected their relationship with each other and God
• [25:22] Searching for alternative family building options and choosing adoption
• [35:55] TJ's perspective of being a mommy without having given birth
• [38:09] TJ's heart for better advocacy and understanding of male infertility

KEY TAKEAWAYS:

• 40-50% of infertility is a male factor and yet there is so little awareness or conversations around this topic. There also aren't routine healthcare options for male fertility.
• Men may appear strong or even indifferent to male factor infertility, but they are grieving and experiencing similar feelings of loss and failure that women face during female infertility.
• Reading books about adoption to your child is a great way to have conversations that help them process the news of their adoption so it's not hurtful later on in life.

BIO:

TJ Peyten is a Georgia native with a mission to raise awareness about Male Factor Infertility. TJ currently works as a health scientist focused on public health policy and workforce training. TJ holds a bachelors in English and Communication, a masters in Communication and Social Work, and a Doctorate in Health Education. Her hobbies include spending time with her family, traveling, journaling, eating great food, and watching college football.

TJ's infertility journey started in 2013, when, after five years of marriage, it was discovered that her husband was the factor in their inability to conceive. Frustrated at the lack of support and resources available for those struggling with male infertility, TJ used her journal as an outlet to deal with the pain. After several years of coping with their infertility through her journal, TJ finally got the courage to share her story with the world through her book Semen Secrets: Truths and Confessions of a Wife's Journey Through Male Infertility. TJ's journey to parenthood was not easy, but in 2019, TJ and her husband were blessed to finally realize their dream of becoming parents to a beautiful baby girl.

TJ Peyten on Instagram

TJ's Book: Semen Secrets: Truths and Confessions of a Wife's Journey Through Male Infertility

Semen Secrets Website

TJ Peyten on Facebook

In this episode, I speak with Chicago blogger and social media influencer, Jen Worman about divorce, dating and solo parenting! We cover a lot of ground in a short amount of time – like owning your actions in any relationship, showing up for yourself, and unapologetically reaching for your dreams. Jen opens up about her divorce, her experience dating with kids, and how she has learned the important truth that you can only control yourself. Grab a glass of wine and listen to this fun conversation as we talk about celebrating where you are in your life and creating your own beautiful family.

IN THIS EPISODE:

• [03:59] Solo parenting, lessons learned after divorce, and learning to be complete without a relationship
• [13:45] Traditional views around single parenting and embracing the freedom of singleness
• [17:09] Dating and friendships in light of being a single mom
• [25:30] Pursuing your dreams and pushing past limitations
• [29:19] What led to Jen's decision to get a divorce
• [35:26] How to get to a better place with your ex-husband and how to work on yourself

KEY TAKEAWAYS:

• Being single isn't something to be fixed. Stop trying to fix that. It is okay to be single.
• It's important to celebrate the important and hard decisions that have been made while also accepting those things that you can't control and focusing on what you can control.
• Oftentimes the best things in life come from the hardest things you've ever had to experience.

BIO:

Jen Worman on Instagram

Jen Worman Website

In today's episode, I'm speaking with Lauren Wynn about her 8 miscarriages, emergency surgery and ultimately building her family through IVF. What's more, Lauren's husband EJ sold much of his prized and valuable sneaker collection to cover the cost of their fertility treatments. After experiencing her 8 miscarriages, Lauren has become a women's and fertility health advocate and their story shows just how complicated, expensive and painful the family building journey can be for some. Lauren has a significant amount of medical information and relationship advice to share - we joke that she's gotten a medical degree through her fertility journey. I thoroughly enjoyed our conversation and know you will, too!

IN THIS EPISODE:

• [02:08] Introduction to Lauren and how she has navigated experiencing multiple miscarriages in a short amount of time.
• [07:44] How to get a doctor to pay attention when you're having physical and emotional pain and advocate for your medical needs.
• [15:15] How to navigate emotions through multiple losses as an individual and as a couple.
• [22:05] The decision to pursue IVF and become her own medical advocate.
• [28:08] An unconventional way to pay for IVF.
• [35:13] How Lauren's definition of family has changed and the community she has found during her fertility journey.

KEY TAKEAWAYS:

• If your doctor is not listening to your physical or emotional needs, don't waste your time with them. Find another doctor who will put your health needs first.
• After women have a miscarriage, they need to be aware of their HCG levels. If HCG levels go up, or remain high, that can be a sign of disease or carcinoma.
• When experiencing loss in a relationship, be honest and open with your partner. Those emotions will not go away. So work through it together and really lean on each other through the hard times.

BIO:

Lauren and and her husband went through eight miscarriages and two failed IUIs with little to no explanation for why she was experiencing recurring pregnacy loss. After their second miscarrieage, she was diagnosed with a septum but wasn't able to find a doctor to remove it until her fourth miscarriage. After their seventh miscarriage, she learned of Reproductive Immunology which led to a diagnosis of high NK cells and Cytokins. After this new diagnosis, they experienced their seventh miscarriage before deciding to try IVF as a last resort. They are now blessed with carrying our rainbow baby boy.

Lauren Wynn on Instagram

Julia Karol is a creative leader, warm friend, animal lover, notable clutz. When she is not hosting Stork'd, Julia runs a private investment firm which acquires, operates, and improves businesses at a crossroads. She loves supporting businesses to grow and evolve. Passionate about social change, Julia also supports a number of non-profit organizations.

Stork'd Facebook Page

Stork'd on Instagram

Stork'd YouTube Channel

In this week's episode, I am joined by Sydney Sharon, who discusses the topic of donor-conception. Sydney is one of the rare people who has experienced donor conception from all angles: she has used donor sperm, is raising donor conceived children, has a father who was a donor and is building relationships with her newly expanded "BioFam" of siblings. In this episode, Sydney discusses her upbringing, meeting her lovely wife Britt, their Jewish beliefs, and how they have worked through their decisions regarding selecting a donor for their children. She also talks about how she learned she has six siblings through donor conception from her father, referring to her siblings as BioSibs, who was a sperm donor before having his children. We dive into identity after becoming a mother and how to help donor-conceived children determine their identity as they grow up. This episode is packed full of advice and storytelling of The Sharon Mom's journey to creating a family of their own.

IN THIS EPISODE:

• [2:23] Introduction to Sydney.
• [5:58] Journey of becoming a mom and her relationship with her wife Britt.
• [11:05] We discuss Sydney's roles in life: motherhood, being a wife, Judaism, and more.
• [17:21] How did Sydney and Britt choose a donor?
• [28:35] How many vials should the donor have for future children's decisions?
• [34:04] How does Sydney think about helping kids form their identity and donor conception history?
• [39:33] Your life sounds too good to be true; is it really this filled with joy and happy circumstances?
• [42:16] Issues that are coming up and data that is becoming more aware surrounding male factor infertility.
• [44:30] Anonymity and privacy around sperm donors with technology like 23 and Me and ancestry.com.
• [47:20] How has being in a donor-conceived family shaped Sydney's definition of family?

KEY TAKEAWAYS:

• Every person will look at their donor's information differently and prioritize how they choose a donor differently. There is no one size fits all way to selecting the right donor. Sydney and Britt chose based on blood type, hair color, and height.
• Family is what you make of it. Being related through blood isn't what makes you a family; instead, choosing who your family is and creating supportive people is what makes a family.
• Knowing your identity and who you helped you feel confident in your decisions. Sydney and Britt are Jewish and gay, but there were never any other options because it's just who they are.

RESOURCE LINKS

TheSharonMoms Instagram

TheSharonMoms Blog

BIO:

Nearly 10 years ago the two of us began dating. In that time, we have traveled to dozens of places around the world, both near and far, adopted our little pup, Chloe, married, and most recently, welcomed our baby girl into this great big world.

We have chosen to document our journey with all its trials and tribulations, in all its glory, for several reasons. The first of which is to hopefully create a sort of capsule that we can one day share with our children. Another reason is to provide us both with an outlet to write, which for us, gives us some peace of mind and comfort. And thirdly, for community.

Stork'd Facebook Page

Stork'd on Instagram

Stork'd YouTube Channel

Welcome to Season 4 of Stork'd! This introduction episode kicks off with the concept of "Choose Your Hard", assuming that you have access to those choices. Throughout this episode, you will hear snippets of Julia and several of her guests from this upcoming season discussing their family building stories. This episode focuses on a compilation of choices, tradeoffs and experiences guests encounter in building their families including: choosing divorce, to freeze eggs, to do one more round of IVF after many miscarriages, or to not have kids. The episode also features stories from families facing circumstances outside of their control such as illness, discovering you are donor conceived and loss. In this episode, Julia touches on her feelings about Roe v. Wade and the impacts on future families with the choices they may no longer have. Finally, we are excited for our first sponsor, California Cryobank. Tune in this season to weekly episodes celebrating all families and we hope you enjoy season 4!

IN THIS EPISODE:

• [1:36] How do you choose your tradeoffs?
• [2:25] "Choose Your Hard" poem. How Julia interprets this poem from the perspective of our family lives.
• [4:38] What is Julia's "hard?" The difficulties she has faced when she chose to be a single parent.
• [6:36] How "Choosing Hard" applies to guests you will hear on future season 4 episodes.
• [7:00] A clip of future season 4 guest, Jen, expressing her emotions around choosing divorce.
• [8:10] Future season 4 guest, Cam, and her choice to freeze her eggs.
• [9:36] Meg's choice to build a family solely through adoption.
• [11:45] Chelsea watched as her parent deteriorated due to a terminal illness. How was she able to cope with those things that were thrust upon her and out of her control?
• [12:45] Discovering your father was a sperm donor and you have donor conceived siblings. How Sydney connected with her BioSibs
• [13:50] Discovering you are donor conceived at age 13. How Louise experienced this stunning revelation.
• [15:30] Faced with the unthinkable: Yvette's heartbreaking story of her son's death days after he was born.
• [17:30] Dealing with 8 miscarriages: Lauren's choice to find another doctor who ulitmalely saved her life.
• [19:14] Overturn of Roe v. Wade - the potential implications for women to access life saving medical treatments.
• [22:38] What to expect for Season 4!

KEY TAKEAWAYS:

• No matter what decision you make, it is going to be hard. There will be things that come up that create complications, but regardless of the decision, there will be challenges that arise.
• Sometimes we don't get to choose our circumstances. Instead, choosing your hard can be navigating things that happen TO us.
• In every episode, we end up hearing a pivot point, where someone's life goes through a change in which they had to make a decision; they had to choose which direction their life was going to go.
• Season 4's new sponsor, California Cryobank, holds a special place in Julia's family. She chose her sperm donor from California Cryobank.

RESOURCE LINKS

Stork'd Facebook Page

Stork'd on Instagram

Stork'd YouTube Channel

Stork'd Website

California Cryobank

In this week's episode, we get to hear from Jordana Kier, the founder of LOLA, which is a feminine and reproductive health products company. Jordana talks about how becoming a dog mom for the first time primed her for motherhood in a variety of ways. She speaks to the process of embracing new roles like CEO and Mom and how she balances the two. Jordana shares her own maternity leave experience and how LOLA's parental leave differs from other companies and benefits parents and families. Listen in as Julia and Jordana talk about identity, personal and professional growth, and how LOLA supports women in more ways than one.

IN THIS EPISODE:

• [02:07] About Jordana, how her family has evolved, and how their dog, Lucy, played a role
• [09:11] Reflecting on Jordana's evolving identities
• [13:01] Parental leave and the reentry process
• [22:00] What about other women in companies that don't support new moms
• [25:30] How LOLA came to be
• [35:18] Jordana's journey to motherhood
• [41:10] What does family mean to Jordana

KEY TAKEAWAYS:

• Research indicates that when you bring animals into your home it can prime your brain and help prepare you biologically and emotionally to move forward in the next part of your family-building process.
• At LOLA, the on-boarding process following parental leave is just as important as the off-boarding process. It's also mutually beneficial for the business as well as the new parent and can help businesses continue to grow and thrive.
• As we try new things or step into new identities and roles it's all about learning to be more comfortable in moments that don't have a natural resolution. It's about learning to be okay in the highs and lows.

RESOURCE LINKS

LOLA Website - https://mylola.com/

Stork'd Website - https://www.storkdpodcast.com/

BIO

Jordana Kier is the co-founder and Co-CEO of LOLA, the first lifelong brand for reproductive health. In her role, Jordana is responsible for overseeing the marketing and sales teams, leading the brand's efforts to provide an ever-expanding portfolio of trusted products and reproductive health resources for every stage of life. Jordana was responsible for overseeing LOLA's omnichannel expansion into Walmart, marking the retailer's largest investment in the natural feminine care category to date. Before co-founding LOLA, Jordana received her MBA from Columbia Business School. She graduated from Dartmouth College and was named to Forbes 30 Under 30 in 2016 and Crain's 40 under 40 in 2019. Jordana also serves on the Dartmouth Entrepreneurial Network Advisory Board. She loves Hans Zimmer movie scores, competitive sports, and road trips in foreign countries.

*Trigger warning for anyone who has experienced miscarriage or loss.* In this week's episode, we have the pleasure of talking with Ashley Sondergaard. Ashley is the host of the "Yoga Magic" podcast where she explores the depths of self care, something that touches every component of our lives – spiritual, physical, and emotional. Ashley shares her own story of how her self care toolkit has evolved after stepping into parenthood and in the midst of a painful experience with miscarriage. Ashley reminds us what self care truly means and how it ultimately boils down to the absence of "should" from our lives. We can nurture ourselves, like she has done, by showing up first for yourself and then showing up for others out of the overflow of energy and capacity that self care creates.

In This Episode:

[ 3:27 ] Ashley's introduction

[ 4:32 ] What does self-care mean to you

[ 6:03 ] How self-care and family rhythms work together

[ 8:54 ] Self-care in practice when things don't go as planned

[ 11:22 ] How Ashley's self-care practices have changed

[ 13:00 ] Is self care the absence of "shoulds" and guilt

[ 14:07 ] Where Ashley's hesitation to be a mom originated and when the desire changed

[ 16:45 ] Decision making based on intuition

[ 18:13 ] Ashley shares about her painful experience with miscarriage

[ 30:44 ] How miscarriage changed Ashley's relationships with her two daughters

[ 35:10 ] How best to support someone after miscarriage

[ 38:20 ] How miscarriage changed Ashley's view of family and family planning

[ 43:11 ] How Ashley defines family

Takeaways:

• Self-care is more than just filling your own cup. It's being so filled up that you have the energy, space and capacity to care for other people.
• Self-care and caring for others go hand in hand. You can't care for others long term if you aren't taking care of yourself first.
• Self-care at its best is the absence of "should'' from your vocabulary. It's releasing the guilt associated with expectations and making space for what's best for your spiritual, mental, and physical health.
• Even with a well stocked "tool kit" of self care knowledge, miscarriage and grief will still be all consuming and at times debilitating. Give yourself the space to grieve and heal.
• Women often experience postpartum symptoms (like emotional and hormonal changes) after a miscarriage. It's important to recognize this and allow your body to heal as if you are postpartum.

Links:

Ashleysondergaard.com - Website

Instagram

Podcast

Disclaimer:

The podcasts available on this website have been produced for informational, educational and entertainment purposes only. The stories and experiences contained within reflect the experiences and opinions of the guest and may contain content found to be triggering by listeners. Listeners should take care to avoid program content which may not be suited to them.

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