While Portland freezes, the Portland Timbers are in sunny and warm Coachella. Sam, Alex, Jeremy, and Luukas preview the Coachella Valley Invitational preseason tournament and what to watch for (spoiler: it’s not the scoreline). Plus, with more smoke around Evander’s pending exit from the Timbers, the gang dives into what that departure could look like (spoiler: we are a divided front).

Featuring: Alex’s groundhog takes, Jeremy’s Geoguessr prowess, Luukas’ impression, and Sam once again forgetting to introduce himself.

The Stumptown Footy crew breaks down the Deyna Castellanos signing and how she’ll fit in on the team. They also review the offseason and whether it has been good enough to move the team forward.

Where will the team finish in 2025? Phuoc, Wilder, and Melina make their predictions.

Don’t miss out on the few teases Phuoc drops towards the end of the episode as well as his phone is going off at times. Wilder brings her trademark optimism, but also a realistic outlook. Melina had her matcha and was ready to go.

Who would you like us to interview first in 2025? Let us know in the comments!Did you want us to discuss anything in particular? We’ll have a special subscribers-only mailbag podcast before the season.

The Timbers are in offseason mode, a new left back is on his way, nobody knows where Evander is, and Portland is back in U.S. Open Cup. There’s a lot to talk about, and Sam, Alex, Luukas, and returning champion Jeremy Perterman did a lot of talking about it.

What do you get when you combine Sam “And Now My Intro is Over” Svilar, Alex “Soiled the Party” Barnes, Luukas “Nedward” Ojala, and Jeremy “I love Homecomings” Peterman? 70 minutes of soccer shenanigans, baby.

The Timbers preseason is revving up, and we have some bona fide comments from players and coaches to parse through.

Sam, Alex, Luukas, and Phuoc have their say about Portland’s preseason priorities, new and expected signings, and of course the ongoing Evander saga.

Listen on to hear: Sam’s Wes Anderson movie reference, Luukas making everyone feel old, Phuoc making everyone frustrated at Portland’s outgoing transfer strategy, and Alex’s call for preparation for the fanbase.

The Stumptown Footy crew is back to discuss the new hiring of Jeff Agoos and his introductory presser where he shared quite a few updates.

Don’t miss out on Phuoc still trying to decide what pronunciation of ‘Agoos’ that he will be moving forward with, Melina’s remaining questions, and Wilder’s optimistic view ahead for the club.

For the 2025 season, we will have even more interviews with players, coaches, and staff. Who would you like us to bring on?

What are the biggest priorities right now for the club?

The STF Thorns gang is back, and we’ve got a lot to process.

Thorns are leaving town left and right — what does it all mean? Are the Thorns in better or worse shape than before? How are we all processing some emotional farewells? Sam, Phuoc, Melina, and Wilder talk through it all.

Then, we share our New Year’s Resolutions for the Portland Thorns. What do we wish for the Thorns in 2025? Listen on to find out!

Plus: Wilder is still somehow optimistic, Melina is still justifiably critical, Sam is still emotional, and Phuoc is still… also optimistic?

Happy New Year! Sam, Alex, and Luukas kick 2025 off with an episode chatting about all the recent Timbers news. A new winger is in town, there’s more links to forwards, and it’s the 50th anniversary of this weird, wonderful club — and the gang is here to break it down.

Sam’s transitions are even better. Luukas’ stats are even more insightful. Alex’s preseason excitement is incredulously even higher. New year, same old us.

In a Christmas Day special, the Merseyside Boys ride again to talk about the Portland Timbers. Rumored signings, some GAM talk, SuperDraft chat, and schedule analysis — this episode really is an MLS Sickos dream.

Featuring: perhaps Sam’s worst opening of all-time, and Alex’s thumbs-down to future references.

*Note: if it wasn’t obvious, this podcast was recorded before the Timbers signed Ariel Lassiter — which you can read about here!

On behalf of everyone at Stumptown Footy, we wish you a Happy Holidays! Thanks as always for all of your support!

Becky Sauerbrunn is hanging them up, so of course we had to chat about it.

Sam and Wilder reflect on her legacy, what it means for the Thorns offseason, and then touch on the newest rumored NWSL expansion team.

Then, Sam, Phuoc, and Melina dive into what the Thorns are losing with Sauerbrunn departing. They also chat about what other key signings Portland needs to make this winter.

All that and more in this episode, including: Sam’s summation of Denver soccer stadiums, Wilder’s reflection on altitude sickness, Melina’s bleak assessment of the Thorns midfield, and Phuoc’s holiday message.

The Stumptown gang dives back into the mailbag to answer more of your questions — this time all about the Portland Thorns! Phuoc, Wilder and Sam work through questions related to the critical and uncertain offseason for the Thorns, and the years beyond.

What needs to happen for next season to be an improvement for the Thorns? Who should be the head coach? What is the future of Soph Smith and Sam Coffey? What needs to happen for the USWNT to return to Portland? Listen to find out!

Featuring: Wilder “Cranberry sauce” Isom, Phuoc “Turkey is overrated” Nguyen, and Sam “Mashed potato” Svilar.