Survivor Sanctuary

What's in a name? And more specifically, what's in a name we give ourselves (or earn from others) in the aftermath of trauma? In this episode of Survivor Sanctuary, I share an embarrassing "name" I earned as a child struggling to survive the shame of abuse. A source of embarrassment for the majority of my life, I was able to relearn the definition of my name so that I am now able to wear it as a badge of honor. Reframing our beliefs about ourselves and who we are as survivors isn't easy--but it *is* possible. So who are you? What do you believe about yourself as a survivor of abuse? Let's find out on today's episode.

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On this episode of Survivor Sanctuary, I have the privilege of speaking with Sandy Phillips Kirkham, a survivor of clergy sexual abuse who has written a book about her experience. Sandy's story is heartbreaking, yet hopeful, and she now uses her powerful voice to speak out on behalf of the abused.  

Sandy's Book: Let Me Prey Upon You

On today’s episode of Survivor Sanctuary, we finish chatting with our awesome Aussie friend, Erik Pederson. In addition to suffering abuse as a child and young adult, Erik experienced spiritual abuse by leadership of a church, who sickeningly used his past abuse against him in order to drive him away from the congregation. Churches don't like messy, but that's what we all are, and Erik is using his painful experiences as motivation to stand up for the mistreated. 

Links from today's Episode:

The Outback Berean (Facebook)

Erik Pederson is our guest on today’s episode of Survivor Sanctuary, so fasten your seatbelts! Erik is an Awesome Aussie who podcasts Down Under, and speaks out against sexual abuse on the regular. He’s also hands down the most entertaining fella in the Survivor Sanctuary Facebook group! Erik’s life has been riddled throughout by trauma, including the trauma of sexual abuse. He's endured more than a human should ever have to, but he's still standing strong, and we're honored to share his story today on the podcast. 

Links from today's Episode:

The Outback Berean (Facebook)

On today’s episode, we have a very special guest: my cousin, Joshua Yoder! Joshua is a minister with a podcast all about the Bible, and on this episode he helps us unravel the truth behind one of the scriptures that gets blasted at sexual abuse survivors by well-meaning (but clueless) Christians. Does “forgetting those things that are behind” mean we shouldn’t ever think about or face our past? And if it doesn’t, then WHY do survivors hear it all the time?

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Unbinding the Bible Podcast

Many of us have been told our whole lives that it is best to leave the past in the past—but what if truly healing from our past requires us to engage it rather than escape it? Today’s episode is for anyone, abuse victim or otherwise, who has experienced wounds in the past that are affecting them in the present. Healing is possible; unfortunately, there are no detours through the pain of the past.

On today's episode, I have the privilege of sharing the story of one of our Survivor Sanctuary listeners. Rachel began to be sexually abused within the walls of her church as a very vulnerable young woman, and her repeated cries for help fell on deaf, calloused ears. Though she asked for help, Rachel continued to endure abuse at the hands of a monster while the people she disclosed the assault to left her to deal with her abuser alone, adding to her shame and fear rather than intervening.  Rachel's story is a reminder that sometimes our deepest wounds are inflicted by those who never physically touch us. And it begs the question, how far should we go to protect the most vulnerable among us? 

You know how people say your college years are the best of your life? Yeah, those people didn't go to college where I did.  

A recent podcast featuring Title IX expert Laura Dunn had me all kinds of triggered this past week, and what better place to unpack all that trauma than on today's episode of Survivor Sanctuary?! In this episode I'll share why college was *the* darkest time of my life, what the onslaught of my anxiety disorder looked like, my experience with being sexually harassed on campus, and the lackluster way Southeastern University (and its students) dealt with sexual misconduct.

Resources:

Julie Roys's Article On Pastor John Ortberg

On today’s episode of Survivor Sanctuary, we’re chatting about loss, legacy, and what it takes to be a hero in the life of a survivor of sexual abuse. 

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Don Blackwell on Twitter

When it comes to feelings of guilt, sexual abuse is the gift that keeps on giving. Just when you think you’ve made progress in letting go of the deep rooted self-blame, a fun *new* guilt emerges. On this episode of Survivor Sanctuary, Kelly chats about Survivor Guilt--a really crummy side effect of disclosing your abuse and outing your abuser. So what exactly is Survivor Guilt? And what in the world can Keanu Reeves do to help us combat it? Find out in today's episode!

Don't forget to join the Survivor Sanctuary Facebook Group!