Sweet Valley Diaries

Jessica is changing her entire personality for a boy and the changes are...bad. And hilarious. Hosts of the Gossip Guys podcast, Andrew Greene and Aaron Davitian marvel at the sparkling prose of PLAYING FOR KEEPS, and at a certain sexpot named Pamela Janson. 

• Gossip Guys Podcast 

Music in this episode courtesy of Purple Planet

Omigod you guys, Gladiator Heather sent in her very own copy of the official 1988 Sweet Valley High Slam Book! Denise and Marissa read personal messages straight from Liz and Jessica themselves, and don't dwell too much on the idea that the very thing that caused such chaos at Sweet Valley High in Book 48 was marketed to tweens as some kind of super good fun-time school activity.

From the vantage point of 2020, it's unclear whether Sweet Valley High #48, SLAM BOOK FEVER, captured a phenomenon or started one. What we know for sure is that teenagers writing down all their opinions about each other could never, ever go wrong, hurt anyone's feelings, or spawn false rumors. Denise Boylan is back to talk about the Pandora's box Amy Sutton has opened onto an unsuspecting Sweet Valley.

Marissa Wasseluk-Stuart is back for a promised discussion of the 1999 teen rom-com DRIVE ME CRAZY. We promise, it has at least a little something to do with Sweet Valley High #47. What? Listen to find out!

Discussed in this episode:

Drive Me Crazy film

Drive Me Crazy music video

Hallmark movie Advent Calendar

Never Have I Ever

Marissa Wasseluk-Stuart returns to talk about the other Porter sister, Julie. Julie's friend Josh is pledging SVH fraternity Phi Epsilon, Elizabeth is back at recorder practice, Jessica is auditioning to be the lead in a play she knows nothing about, and Bruce Patman is his old self again, only worse. But who is the Troublemaker?! Listen to find out...that it is almost certainly Bruce!

Marissa and her guest Mary Kate have been friends since middle school. In this extra drama, they reminisce not so much about small town life in Northwest Indiana, but about leaving that small town life behind. Also, we talk a little bit about DECISIONS, promise!

Read more about the Polar Bear Run event that's a part of Kuvia at University of Chicago.

Marissa's BFF Mary Kate Battles is back for more Robin Wilson drama! A lot has changed since POWER PLAY -- now Robin's a star diver with a big decision on her hands. But never mind all that; let's talk about the haunting melodic potential of the humble recorder! Mars & MK discuss the very relatable and universal pressures of life in Sweet Valley, California, where everything and nothing is deferred.

In FAMILY SECRETS, Kelly Bates is plagued by a recurring dream. She only remembers scant details, but hey, that's all you need when consulting 1996's ILLUSTRATED DREAM DICTIONARY, a book Marissa has had on her shelf since middle school (probably). What does the book say about Kelly's dream? Shey Lyn Zanotti returns and even offers up a dream of her own for scrutiny.

ILLUSTRATED DREAM DICTIONARY on Goodreads

Luke Perry memorial on @sweetvalleydiaries Instagram

See No Evil...never before has one phrase simultaneously served as the rear cover headline, the main character's flaw, and the costume that she wears to the Big Dance. Guest reader (and former Sweet Valley High reader!) Shey Lyn Zanotti joins Marissa to dissect all the ways that long-lost (and heretofore forgotten) Wakefield cousin Kelly Bates turns a blind eye to the evils around her. And for once we're not talking about Jessica.

I Was a Teenage Wereskunk

Marissa and guest reader Katie LaDue bring their personal baggage to bear on Steven's behavior, then on Abbie's. Then things turn to the baggage that other people (like the Wakefield Twins, say) bring into their assumptions about others. All the armchair psychology two book nerds can cram into 16 minutes of bonus content!

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"I've learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel." - Maya Angelou