Taylor’d Takes

I’m reporting from vacation and Chi Chi had to leave NYC because she is SICK OF AMANDA & WEST. PERIOD. But Summer House Reunion Part Three waits for no one!!!!!

And somehow... after three reunion episodes, leaked audio, Bravo sleuths, timeline investigations, Peacock bonus scenes, and enough conspiracy theories to fill an FBI evidence board... we still have questions and WE. ARE. OFFICIALLY. TIRED. Buuuut let’s get into it.

* The beta blocker question heard around Bravo... and what we think is sitting on the editing room floor

* Kyle Cooke being the voice of reason

* West somehow managed to make himself look even worse than he did last week. Which honestly deserves its own award.

* Whether Amanda is trapped, checked out, protecting herself... or all three

* West admitting he’s been unclear with “a zillion” women and somehow thinking that helps his defense

* Our comparison of West to Jax Taylor... and why West WISHES he was Jax. At least Jax owns being the villain.

* Amanda refusing to watch the season back and why that tells us EVERYTHING

* The “fabulous” comment that sent both of us into immediate cardiac arrest

* And my completely unexpected Shaboozey x Summer House crossover moment in Nashville that proves you can never escape Bravo

Subscribe and join us next week for SUMMER HOUSE: THE AFTERMATH. And trust us... we are GIDDY.

Follow Chi Chi’s Substack, Seedy Studio, where she delivers weekly observations that are sharp, stylish, occasionally ruthless, and somehow always correct. She’s going to tell you what she thinks whether you asked or not.

Chi Chi is back breaking down Summer House Reunion Part Two!!!!! And West seriously thinking he had backup… he in fact did not.

What starts as another ex entering the Summer House turns into the plot twist nobody saw coming. West brought someone into the conversation who he thought would be on his side… and instead she became one of the most credible people to expose exactly who he is. OOOOF!!!! Talk about poetic justice. And Dara, Meija, and Ciara are getting the last laugh.

We get into:

* Amanda fully unraveling at the reunion (someone please unclick her mute button)

* The Mia comment that lands like a straight knockout punch

* West realizing way too late that Amanda being single is… actually a thing

* Amanda as the “Robin” of every relationship on Summer House… and her Batmans are nowhere to be found

* Kyle Cooke’s entire emotional rollercoaster arc (crying, concerned, betrayed, self-aware, yelling… repeat)

* The real truth underneath Kyle + Amanda that keeps bubbling up after years of procrastinated conversations, Amazon packages, and Loverboy deliverables

* Jesse’s tour backlash and his bloodshot eyes

* And Dara dropping a bomb that sends a shockwave from NYC to Missouri and back

Subscribe and join us next week for SUMMER HOUSE REUNION PART THREE!!!!

Follow Chi Chi’s Substack, Seedy Studio, where she delivers weekly observations that are sharp, stylish, occasionally ruthless, and somehow always correct. She’s going to tell you what she thinks whether you asked or not.

DROP THE RECEIPTS WE NEED TO UNCOVER THIS TIMELINE. DETECTIVE CHI CHI & TAYLOR ARE ON THE CASE.

A friend gets a part-time job at a dry cleaner because she genuinely loves folding laundry, and it sends us into an existential spiral: What actually counts as a hobby anymore? Why do we feel the need to monetize everything we enjoy? And why did Barbie make us think we could have 100 careers and still have time for a beach house?

Plus, childhood dream jobs, shark tagging, side hustles, Kim Kardashian’s apparent Lewis Hamilton hard launch, the Kevin Hart roast, celebrity hall passes, and an update on Ryan’s free Apple TV+ subscription from a Chinese restaurant - which has officially changed his life. Yes. Apple TV+ won.

Are you a Ryan with 37 hobbies and a hobby philosophy, or a Taylor wondering if her hobbies accidentally became jobs?

Subscribe and join us every Tuesday!!!! LYT!

All we wanted was RECEIPTS. PROOF. TIMELINE. And Amanda and West said, “no comment”, trying to piece together a timeline THEY don’t even believe. Luckily for us, we have the seasoned veterans led by Mother Hubbard… plus Mia asking the question keeping us all up at night: “Amanda… WHY?”

I’m joined by my cousin Chi Chi as we do what we do best: dissect a situation we have absolutely nothing to do with.

We get into:

* Amanda and West thinking they’d get a slap on the wrist… until minute two

* “Ear stuff” gate and West’s manipulation tactics, including trying to distract everyone with his leaked d*ck pic

* Ben unknowingly walking straight into the lion’s den and us asking ourselves: “G’day mate… do you not like when women speak out of turn?” But also… why can’t men ever stand up for themselves when a woman upsets them? Either way, Bailey had her reunion moment.

* Amanda “taking accountability” while deflecting for 45 straight minutes

* Ciara’s Louvre-worthy clapbacks

* The backstage buildup that had us THANKING Bravo for giving the people what they want

* The Rome escape plan that “brings a level of avoidance that’s never been seen” - a Chi Chi original quote that deserves journalistic recognition

* The diabolical text trail

* Kyle and Ciara’s heartfelt moment

* Mia and KJ bringing sincerity to Bravo

* and all the moments that had us laughing, screaming, and crying at our TVs

See you next week for Part 2. Sweet Jesus.

Follow Chi Chi’s Substack, Seedy Studio, where she delivers weekly observations that are sharp, stylish, occasionally ruthless, and somehow always correct. She’s going to tell you what she thinks whether you asked or not.

DROP THE RECEIPTS WE NEED TO UNCOVER THIS TIMELINE. DETECTIVE CHI CHI & TAYLOR ARE ON THE CASE.

Do you ever create SUCH a detailed fantasy in your head about a moment that you end up comparing the real thing to the movie version you already created? Because hi. Same. This week I talk about my self-diagnosed “Perfect Moment Syndrome” - aka turning weddings, weekend trips, date nights, and random Tuesdays into cinematic experiences in my brain and then spiraling when one tiny thing doesn’t go according to plan. We’re getting into perfectionism, expectations, burnout, relationships, my one year wedding anniversary, and why some of the BEST moments in life happen when you stop trying so hard to make them perfect. Consider this your reminder (and mine) to stop living in “what it should’ve been” and start living in what it actually is. ALSO. Summer House reunion night is HERE and Chi Chi is coming back tomorrow because obviously we have thoughts.

I’m bringing in the person I religiously call to dissect all things Bravo: my cousin Caileigh, formally known as “Chi Chi.” Just because we’re cut from the same cloth doesn’t mean our takes are always aligned. But one thing about us? We refuse to let a Bravo conversation die. Chi Chi and I aren’t counting sheep… we’ve got Denise Richards in our dreams yelling “BRAVO BRAVO BRAVO!!!”

We break down the emotional fallout of Kyle and Amanda’s goodbye, Kyle’s tragic Sunday Scaries now that his marriage and show are both over, West’s masterclass in emotional manipulation, why we need Ciara to give CIARA a pep talk about her choices in men, and how Scheana Shay somehow made the Summer House season finale about her. We also make a passionate case for Lindsay and Carl becoming best friends again, discuss Andy Cohen’s obvious favorites, and throw out wildly specific predictions for Kyle and West’s inevitable reconciliation. And so much more. We could’ve kept going.

It’s cousin chaos with zero media training, unmatched Bravo lore, and enough over-analysis to earn us honorary producer credits.

Plus, Chi Chi brings the kind of insider NYC fashion intel that makes you want to rebuild your wardrobe, rearrange your apartment, and reevaluate every decision you’ve made aesthetically since 2016. Her Substack, Seedy Studio, delivers weekly observations that are sharp, stylish, occasionally ruthless, and somehow always correct. She’s going to tell you what she thinks whether you asked or not.

Share this with your friend that can’t shut up about Bravo. They’ll thank you.

I worked graduation weekend, and it reminded me of a few things.

* Somewhere in my late 20s I accidentally found another thing I genuinely enjoy outside of Taylor’d Takes: serving.

It’s a grind, it’s exhausting, but so is literally every job? I love having a front-row seat to life’s biggest moments. And apparently getting called in as the “morale booster” is now part of my brand lol.

* Graduation season sent me into a full college flashback spiral.I thought I was confident… I was actually just aggressively faking it until I made it. No regrets, but also… anyone else occasionally cringe at past-you?

* Had a random table conversation about Spencer Pratt running for LA mayor, which somehow turned into a reminder that people love forming strong opinions with zero context.

* Ryan and I got into “energy vampires” and the people who turn struggle into a competitive sport.

* That I need to reset my expectations because perfection isn’t it. Maybe the win isn’t everything I didn’t get done… it’s that I was actually out there living.

* My irrational fear of being kidnapped means I run through parking garages like I’m in a crime show just to get to my car.

Questions of the week! Ryan: What’s your Chinese food order?Taylor: Are you running through the parking garage to get to your car late at night?

Subscribe, follow, and send this to the friend who’s overwhelmed by everything they want to get done and needs the reminder that they’re actually doing better than they think.

We’ve all seen the mall massage setup. Some of you are brave. Some of you are curious. I’m both… So I did it. I got a massage in the middle of a mall and documented the whole thing because you deserve to know what actually happens. Is it relaxing? Is it chaos? Main character moment or public humiliation? I take you with me.

I’ve been a Kyle Cooke stan since day one and this Summer House rewatch only confirmed it: his apology tour is officially over.

Rewatching from season one, it’s clear Kyle’s biggest issue has never been what he’s saying, it’s how he says it. Everyone focuses on the yelling, drinking, and chaos, but misses the pattern underneath it all.

Kyle has consistently carried the emotional, financial, and public weight of his relationship with Amanda Batula while still showing up for her and defending her repeatedly. Not to mention Kyle being Bravo’s ultimate “girls’ girl” defending other women in the house over the years. Remember Cristina? The 17-page email he wrote to the house in defense of Amanda?

And while Kyle continues to show up for everyone, he gets met with his wife subtly turning the house against him and consistently complaining about him from day one. News flash Amanda: Kyle is the partner YOU chose and continued to choose to stay with. At some point, stop complaining about a situation you keep choosing to be in.

Kyle’s delivery often overshadows his valid points, but I am here to say it clearly: Kyle Cooke is done apologizing, and honestly, it’s about time the house apologized to him.

Anywhoooooo. Justice for Kyle Cooke!

TGIF! A Friday episode because the Met Gala takes fully hijacked Tuesday. Naturally.

My birthday was on Sunday, so Ryan and I get into all the extremely important life reflections that come with turning 29 like… wait… did I even fully live my 20s if I’ve never been to a club in Las Vegas? Have I done enough debauchery?

I recap what might’ve been my favorite birthday yet: blueberry pancakes, flea markets, a picnic by the water, fake proposals on docks, and meeting a stranger named Kirk who somehow turned my birthday into an unexpectedly wholesome conversation about life, connection, and talking to people more. Not to mention a fisherman made an appearance and gifted me a birthday present.

I also tell Ryan about making a VERY concrete birthday wish this year. No more vague wishes. I’m talking SMART goals. Measurable. Specific. Scientific. This sh*t needs to happen before I turn 30.

Then my new friend Kirk gives us “questions for the audience” and suddenly we’re discussing:

* Why men refuse to say they’re excited about things

* The unwritten rules of bathroom etiquette

* How to invite a friend to a movie without it feeling like a first date. Who drives? Who buys the tickets? Where are we sitting?

* Why adult friendships weirdly feel like dating

Taylor’d Takes on:

* The power of deleting comments and protecting your energy online

* Why I don’t fully speak on rumors until the SOURCE addresses it

* Troll culture and whether “Duty Heads” invented online trash talk. Ryan survived 2009 Call of Duty Modern Warfare 2 lobbies. IYKYK.

Questions of the week!

Ryan: What was your favorite game to trash talk in?

Taylor: At what age do we stop going into the bathroom stall with our friends?

Subscribe, follow, and send this to the friend you go into the stall with.