Ya, so the show missed a week, but the news didn't. Thus, Tech's Last Call presents two weeks of news in 63 minutes. From last week, Telsa dropped the D...the P85D with dual electric motors and a 0-60 time that might actually make you...drop the D. Also, many gigabytes of Snapchats are on 4Chat because being naked on the Internet always ends well. From this week, Apple and Google announced new devices - some tablets, phones, and a 5k iMac. HBO will offer a streaming only option, and Gamer Gate made it to the cover the New York times and stole Trey's sanity all at the same time. 

Some news stories just won't go away. Yes, Microsoft has abandoned Ballmer's tradition of illogical Windows counting and replaced it with even less logical counting where 10 comes after 8. Yes, Ello exists, and protestors in Hong Kong are using mess networks to stick it to China. However, Trey and Jimmy are not entirely sure that want to stay on the Internet because #GamerGate's spree of harassment has been running rampant for almost two months. The solution? Take the bull by the horns. 

The episode may be late, but issues the team delve into are still with us. Shellshock shocked the Internet with a level of doom and gloom that is seldom seen. Apparently, if you try to break iPhone 6s, they will break - big surprise. India can get to Mars for the same price as a making a movie about space, and Oculus has yet another prototype. They even say some day they will ship, but not now. Hopefully, they figure out their launch plans at about the same rate that the EU figures out what the Internet is. Right now, they want everyone to play search engine roulette. There are stories that will linger for a while. 

On this technological high holy day, we gather around our computers to celebrate in the usual fashion - giving tepid to effusive praise for Apple products. Trey stood in line for 12 hours to tell us that the iPhone 6 Plus is slightly too large. Jimmy played Minecraft for a week to bring the brilliant insight that he has no idea why Microsoft paid so much for them, and Sidney wrote a treatise on Kindles to relate that of the 7 billion different announcements, only two are interesting. Happy iPhone Day everyone. Hug a Jony Ive. 

There remains one company in this industry that can occasionally amaze us by its ability to dominate an entire news week - Apple. From the place where it first announced the Mac 30 years ago, the big fruit unleashed Apple Watch upon the world. It is a smart watch so beautiful, so overly functional, and so not coming out this year that it takes over half of the show. Not to be out done, Apple also gave us two new iPhones (the 6 and 6 Plus) with bigger displays (finally), better battery life (at least in one of them), and NFC (because why not). Once you have them, you might as well set you wallet on fire because you'll iPaying with your Apple Pay service. Just tap and pay, man. Just tap and paaaay. 

This week's Tech's Last Call is incredibly full of actual news, which can only mean one thing - it's not August anymore. Yes, with the arrival of the ninth month comes cellphone and VR news out of IFA in Berlin. Dyson decided it needed a robot, and naked celebrities are the ones taking over the Internet this week simultaneously increasing everyone's awareness on security issues and displacing cats as the most viral (and vile) images in circulation. It can all serve as a reminder as to why Ballmer created the Blue Screen of Death in the first place.  

You know what looks ridiculous? Lyft cars. You know who turns out to be super mean? Uber executives. What we have hear is a pitched battle between the nice/slightly crazy hippie and the mean/streamlined/professional business. Also, Twitch finally commits, but to Bezos and Amazon not Larry with is Google of money. Apparently game streaming is a billion dollar business. Microsoft finally finishes killing messenger. And, someone cared? Samsung is using Nokia maps, and there is anti-date-rape nail polish. So, there is a bright side somewhere. 

On this week's show, the team talks through a week to remember in tech. Ballmer is no longer even on Microsoft's board. Windows Phone got premium hardware from someone other than Nokia. Barnes and Noble either sold out their hardware to Samsung or made a brilliant software play, and Internet censorship has a new wrinkle with the events surrounding the tragic death of James Foley. It's been an unsettling week. So, let's talk it through in detail!

This week, the two shows combine into one mega-episode. You get a rundown of the week's news, such as it was, and random tech commentary all in one neat 40 minutes. What more could you ask for? Well, you're getting a rundown of Microsoft's new voice assistant Cortana, the feud between Lyft and Uber, the lack of real news out of Gamescom, and a positive view of dumping ice on your head. Plus, Trey and Jimmy celebrate the WiiU and the Cathedral of Cologne. It's a well cultured show, really. 

This week, the team hits on themes that you may have heard somewhere before. Google invades your privacy, but this time, it got a guy busted for child pornography. So, there is a bright side. T-Mobile's latest suitor, Sprint, decided that they weren't worth the hassle. 1.2 billion passwords may be in the wild, but you'll never know, unless you pay, and even then you won't know where they came from. Even then, the companies affected can't fix the problem because we don't know who they are. In short, the Internet is being held hostage by what Hold Security may or may not have. Also, in other repetitive news, Trey wants an iPhone, with NFC, and an iWatch. Nothing ever changes. 

NEWS

Google 'reveals user' over Gmail child abuse images - BBC

Houston man charged with child porn possession after Google cyber-tip - KHOU 11

The Tech War On Child Porn Is Not Limited To Google Scanning Gmail - Forbes

Google scans everyone's email for child porn, and it just got a man arrested - The Verge

Sprint reportedly withdraws its bid to buy T-Mobile (updated) - Engadget

Sprint's Hesse leaves carrier the way he found it: Needing a turnaround - CNET

Sprint CEO Dan Hesse's farewell memo to employees - CNET

http://www.holdsecurity.com/

Firm That Exposed Breach Of 'Billion Passwords' Quickly Offered $120 Service To Find Out If You're Affected - Forbes

The Russian 'hack of the century' doesn't add up - The Verge

Apple’s iPhone Event Said To Be Happening Sept. 9  TechCrunch

Apple will reveal its wrist gadget next month, says Apple watcher John Gruber - The Verge

LAST CALL

You haven't known Yoshi's real name for the past 20 years - Polygon

Assassin's Creed: Rogue Is That Other Assassin's Creed Game Coming Out This Year - Giant Bomb

Assassin's Creed Rogue Official Page - Ubisoft