The Art of Expression

💫Once upon a time, there was an enchanted series, where folk gathered to hear the tales of creators who bravely faced, conquered, and continued to conquer, the demons of fear, thus revealing their magical gifts, skills, and true essence to the world.✨

💫I’ve been sitting with wondrous souls—artists, travelers of distant lands, weavers of words, capturers of light, coaches, practitioners, and wise teachers—each one a character of great inspiration whom I deeply admire.✨

💫In this mystical realm, I believe wholeheartedly that our destined success is but a matter of time, so long as we remain steadfast, follow the nudges of our heart in spite of fear, and keep leaning into the things that bring lightness and joy to our souls.✨

Unmute Yourself - Chapter 6

About Nicola

Tune into this captivating conversation with Nicola - a remarkable, multi-faceted, multi-talented woman whose life is a testament to courage, self-discovery, and personal transformation. A body confidence coach, body-positive personal trainer, speaker, poet, women's self-defense teacher, NLP master practitioner and fire, stilt and burlesque performer, Nicola embodies the art of stepping into one's full potential. Nicola is a veritable magician, way-shower and beaming light, I tells you!

Show Notes:

Journey of Self-Expression

01:38 - Overcoming childhood social phobia from a mixed Chinese-English family

03:34 - Transforming from feeling voiceless to becoming a powerful performer and speaker

04:30 - Navigating body image challenges through bodybuilding and burlesque

Quote of the Episode:"Confidence is a side effect of courage"

08:21 - The importance of being embodied and reconnecting with your authentic self

13:57 &15:54 - Challenging societal conditioning around body image and self-worth…Exploring Neuro-Linguistic Programming as a tool for personal growth

17:12 - Understanding the power of mindset in creating life changes and learning to separate from negative thought patterns

Exciting Upcoming Project

Nicola is launching an innovative body-positive tarot card deck:

- Featuring real humans and their personal journeys, each card telling a story of transformation. The deck is designed to provide support for those struggling with body image and personal challenges.

- Expected launch in December/January

Connect with Nicola on Linkedin

Instagram: @body_confidence22

Substack: Nicola Chan

Little Nuggets to Takeaway

- Start small: Step just outside your comfort zone

- Embrace vulnerability as a path to personal growth

- Practice gratitude and recognize how far you've come

- Your body is a storytelling instrument, not an object to be judged

A note to myself:

At one point during our conversation you'll note I'm grappling to explain embodiment. This is really interesting — do you want to know why? It's because after an unexpected rush pre-recording, I wasn't in an embodied state. I was in the very state I was trying to explain the opposite of. 😬 It meant I was living in my head throughout, and not in my body, my heart.

I was fretting about questions rather than allowing my natural curiosity to reign supreme and for the words to move through me.

The Suzy of old would have asked Nicola if we could re-record and I would have berated myself for days.

And yet, Xavier Dagba nails it yet again when he says:

“You become better at shining your light by giving yourself permission to consistently express it imperfectly.”

Yes!

The more we self-flagellate, withdraw back into the shadows, the more we imprison ourselves.

I write a lot here about bringing everything back to love and this is exactly what I mean. If we can tenderly, patiently, and lovingly become aware of, "Oooh I didn't quite handle or say that the way I wanted to. How can I do say/do that a bit differently next time?" rather than entangling ourselves with the inner critics, the more embodied we become. We become the observer, rather than the loud, often negative voices, in our head. And the more magic we'll experience.

“The more you embody your voice, the more you will change your future.”

- Lee Harris

Now go forth and shower your magic upon the world. Perfectly imperfect.

Love you,

Suzy 🪄🌌

(I’m still working on sound quality with audio…thank you for your glorious patience!)

John Cleese once said that the greatest fear of the English is embarrassment.

I’ve collected some hardcore qualifications in the Art of Squirming. Floofing up. Wanting the ground to swallow me whole.

When your personality is one part open-hearted extrovert, one part deeply sensitive introvert, it’s like oil and water, the elements don’t combine together so well. I’m essentially a walking contradiction and it can make for quite an uncomfortable, confusing existence. Can you relate?

Invisibility was my defence mechanism throughout life, honed to perfection in my former high-control belief system - and yet I was someone who was, who is, innately so full of self expression.

Plus, following one’s heart was deemed dangerous in my former belief system. Living fully from the heart? This was a fantasy for me. Friendship with those outside of one’s community was seen as something to be wary of. So many complex layers.

So much of life became about suppression, keeping to “safe” territory, and avoiding risk.

“Some birds are not meant to be caged, that's all. Their feathers are too bright, their songs too sweet and wild. So you let them go,…and the part of you that knows it was wrong to imprison them in the first place rejoices,…”

That is my favourite quote from The Shawshank Redemption. The funny thing is, when we fly free or drop ourselves in any arena requiring visibility we are not necessarily met with rejoicing. We open ourselves up to everything from criticism to cynicism to crickets and everything in between.

Fear of embarrassing ourselves, of judgement, or getting it wrong, it runs so, so deep, doesn’t it?

I can coach people on the craft of public speaking—how to pause for impact, use gestures, and the finesse of storytelling. The importance of pitch, pace and power. But do you know what is harder to learn in my opinion? How to speak and live from the heart. Being our truest selves.

NLP and meditation help with this because this an inside job.

And let’s face it, we English aren’t great at it. We bury ourselves in our cups of tea (or G&T!), and laugh off vulnerability with a self-deprecating quip.

“And what is healing exactly? It is the process of coming to terms with everything you've ever said, done, or experienced, so that you can love all parts of yourself. And there is no one on earth who does not need to go through that process.” - Anne Tucker

Oh Lordy, no wonder we shy away from going within. So much embarrassing stuff hiding away! And I tend to garner new things on the daily.

The Art of Failing Forwards

Last Monday, I decided to follow my heart—and succeeded in spectacularly embarrassing myself. Here’s what happened:

Whilst enjoying brunch at my mum’s I learned that Paddy McGuinness was cycling 300 miles from Wales to Scotland on a Raleigh Chopper bike for charity- Children in Need. For context, I cycle around on an old lady’s style, two gear bicycle, so I got what an incredible feat this was.

Thanks to a tracking app it was evident he was currently on the ferry across The Mersey just a few miles away from me. I had a clear diary for the afternoon, it was a beautiful day, and I thought how nice it would be to go cycle alongside him. Surely there would be loads doing the same thing, cheering him on?

I’m profoundly moved by anyone who meets the deepest, darkest parts of their soul to achieve something great. This past four years, I’ve pushed out of so many comfort zones and boxes, and I’ve ran the London Marathon, twice, after a lifetime of disability and poor health. All of the emotions live in a challenge like that and I know how truly appreciative I was of every person that cheered me on.

So honestly? I don’t care if you are the King of England or the bloke who runs to the corner shop in his pj’s and slippers, I’m here to cheer on anyone wanting to achieve the seemingly impossible. Anyone daring to dream and to dream Big.

I arrived at the ferry terminal on my Bobbin Birdy bicycle festooned with fairy lights and faux autumn leaves, (not for Paddy, that’s just how I roll 😁🪄🍂).

I noted several chaps circling on their own Choppers, others clad in Lycra - that screamed “Proper Cyclist.”

I started to converse with one of the men on a chopper. “Are we going to cycle alongside him?” I chimed out.

We all clearly wanted to be involved but something was holding us back.

“I’ve got to get back”, he replied. Get back to where, I never found out.

Chopper man told me his bike had been his little girl’s many moons ago and had since been hung on the wall. That morning, he’d lifted it out of retirement to show support.

Suddenly Paddy and his support team were off and I managed a feeble: “C’mon Paddy, you got this!”

Because fear of getting told off, or getting in trouble, or doing something not allowed looms so large for me on account of my past (and sometimes not even consciously), I lost any kind of courage to go cycling after him.

I started to cycle home along the dock road. It was a beautiful, autumnal day, I had Coldplay’s latest album for company and I was grateful to be out moving my body.

Somewhere past the Titanic Hotel, I realised that Paddy and his team were cycling parallel to me, along Vauxhall Road. I couldn’t believe it.

Summoning every ounce of courage, ‘Now’s my chance,’ I thought. ‘I’m going to cheer this man and his crazy feat on!’

I shot up one of the side roads and cycled like a bat out of hell to catch him up. Sweat pouring, I finally find myself alongside him. I’m on the pavement and he’s on the road.

Rather than explain what happened next, you can watch me telling the story at an event called “F**k Up Nights” last Thursday evening:

😬🫠I conclude the above by saying that perhaps the most surprising turn in the tale is that the following day saw me want to curl up in a foetal position, hiding under the duvet. I’d followed my heart, embarrassed myself in the process and now felt the deeply rooted shame of a lifetime. My inner critics gobbling on an absolute feast.

Living from an open heart can do that. It can bring in a Vulnerability Hangover faster than you can cycle a Raleigh Chopper uphill.

And here’s the kicker: we will always find evidence to back-up what we believe about ourselves.

Lessons in Living From the Heart

If I could have a do-over, I’d have simply cycled alongside in silent solidarity to a human being doing something extraordinary. No need for awkward exchanges and Reiki infused power thought cards! 😂

It had been foolish and the guilt I felt afterwards was a tsunami of energy to work through. And yet it had come from the very best part of me.

When we show up, follow our heart’s nudges, live from an open heart center I guarantee it will be messy at times. We’ll fall off our bikes, floof up, we will nurse a broken sense of self. Squirm. And yet, call me foolish but I believe it means we are doing something right.

I finished my impromptu speech above with one of my favourite quotes by Oscar Wilde: “To live is the rarest thing in the world. Most people exist, that is all.”

Asking that cute stranger if they’d like to go out for a coffee may end in a moment of rejection.

Getting up on the dance floor may provoke laughter.

Shouting out that compliment to someone we don’t know may not be met with the warm&fuzzy reaction we’d hoped for.

Giving the speech may lead to tumbleweed.

“Life is very fleeting. I've learned that. It has moments you should seize.” Mrs Pretty - The Dig

It’s not a given we’ll wake up in the morning.

On our deathbed will we be languishing in cringey flashbacks? Or will we be grateful for the messy, glorious attempt to live? I reckon we’ll be so thankful for every moment of it.

Say YES to the embarrassment - for it is proof of LIFE.

Do things differently. Let’s make it count.

Now go, be Magic! 🪄

Love you,

Suzy x

Thank you for reading my ramblings. If you enjoyed, can I ask a favour? Please Subscribe for free. It helps me more than you can know and what’s more I do a l’il happy dance for every new Subscriber.

The ‘Unmute Yourself’ Podcast

💫Once upon a time, there was an enchanted series, where folk gathered to hear the tales of creators who bravely faced, conquered, and continued to conquer, the demons of fear, thus revealing their magical gifts, skills, and true essence to the world.✨

💫I’ve been sitting with wondrous souls—artists, travelers of distant lands, weavers of words, capturers of light, coaches, practitioners, and wise teachers—each one a character of great inspiration whom I deeply admire.✨

💫In this mystical realm, I believe wholeheartedly that our destined success is but a matter of time, so long as we remain steadfast, follow the nudges of our heart in spite of fear, and keep leaning into the things that bring lightness and joy to our souls.✨

Unmute Yourself - Episode 5 With Renée Garcia.

In this soul-stirring conversation, I have a lovely natter with the remarkable Renée Garcia, author of "The Quantum Capitalist" and a beacon in the mystic teachings of how we create our own reality.

Renée is someone who epitomises what it is to garner trust in a community through courage, honesty and vulnerability. Here she speaks about transformation that begins in the depths of limitation and blooms into boundless possibility. Certainly Renée could never have the charge, “Yes but it was easy for her,” levelled against her.

From Marginalization to Materialisation

Growing up in an environment marked by financial, emotional, and spiritual poverty, Renée shares candidly. "I was the classic definition of a marginalized child."

The Quantum Shift

At 35, she encountered Reality Transurfing, in what she describes as one of those magical moments where your soul just ‘knows’. Have you ever experienced that feeling when something stirs inside you before your mind can even catch up?

A stirring that came without searching, guided by what in RT speak is called "the rustle of the morning stars."

The Plot Twist

But here's where it gets really interesting, me lovelies. After eight years of manifesting all the shiny things - the houses, the cars, the wild adventures - Renée discovered something far more precious: her true calling. Writing.

Just because we can manifest, going after a goal that's specifically intended for you, and tuning your skill set to support what it is you're intended to do in this world, this is the ultimate practice of manifestation.

Renée Garcia

Her latest book, "The Quantum Capitalist," reflects this evolution. It is designed to awaken people from what she playfully terms "life's monstrous slumber," guiding them toward a reality where wealth—in all its forms—becomes accessible.

A Return to Essence

In a beautiful parallel to Paulo Coelho's "The Alchemist," Renée's Trippy Transurfing has led her to a profound truth: sometimes our greatest treasure lies not in what we can materialise externally, but in discovering and embracing our authentic path.

I find Renée so inspring because for me she personifies what it is to find your true path, and have the courage to follow it - even when (especially when) it leads you somewhere unexpected.

📚Purchase the book: Here’s the link to buy The Quantum Capitalist.

🚀Join the Facebook Group: Here’s the link to Reality Transurfing Institute join 1000’s of others supporting one another in exiting the Matrix.

🪄Access 100’s of videos on Reality Transurfing TV.

💫Once upon a time, there was an enchanted series, where folk gathered to hear the tales of creators who bravely faced, conquered, and continued to conquer, the demons of fear, thus revealing their magical gifts, skills, and true essence to the world.✨

💫I’ve been sitting with wondrous souls—artists, travelers of distant lands, weavers of words, capturers of light, coaches, practitioners, and wise teachers—each one a character of great inspiration whom I deeply admire.✨

💫In this mystical realm, I believe wholeheartedly that our destined success is but a matter of time, so long as we remain steadfast, follow the nudges of our heart in spite of fear, and keep leaning into the things that bring lightness and joy to our souls.✨

Unmute Yourself - Chapter 4

“Bringing color and light to the world by mindfully untangling fairy lights and secretly sprinkling pixie dust.” - Teri-Leigh

One of my favorite things about Substack is the delightful, genuine connections that are made. And frankly, anyone who writes about mindfully untangling fairy lights already has my heart.💫🪄

Teri-Leigh lives, in her own words, “comfortably at the intersection of Grounded Avenue and Woo-Woo Way.”

Her background and credentials are impressive, with a Bachelor of Arts in Creative Writing & Literary Studies and many years in the health and wellness industry tucked into her back pocket, alongside more esoteric learning, such as six-plus years of intensive training in African Shamanism.

Teri-Leigh has honed her lifelong skills in seeing and reading energy to help others feel truly heard and seen, empowering them to take action, celebrate their wins, and repeat the process.

What fear dragons has Teri-Leigh herself slayed? How does she overcome fear?

I hope you enjoy the golden nuggets of wisdom throughout this chat as much as I did.

How to Connect With Teri-Leigh

Teri Leigh 💜 The Mindfulsense Mentor - Weekly doable mindfulness exercises based on the neuroscience of how your 🧠brain works - in tiny repeated bite-sized bits to shush your monkey mind.

The 🧙🏼‍♂️Hobbit & The 🦉Owl - Mindful in Love

Words are Spells 🔮 With her gift of Synaesthesia, Bachelor of Arts in Creative Writing & Literary Studies and 20+ Years Teaching Experience, check out Teri’s brilliant weekly letter on the energetic analysis of language, linguistics, and letters.

Work with Teri-Leigh - The Mindfulsense Mentor.

Time Stamps:

1 minute 50 seconds: Teri has overcome some tremendous challenges in life—what role did fear play during those times? How did she befriend fear?

9 minutes 44 seconds: How do we differentiate between the voice of fear and our true inner wisdom/intuition?

15 minutes 22 seconds: Teri-Leigh’s background, from African Shamanism to a Bachelor of Arts in Creative Writing and Literary Studies, is so impressive—the conventional to the esoteric. Were there ever times when Teri dimmed her own colors or feared being seen? How did she move through that?

22 minutes: Fear often manifests in the body as illness or tension. How does Teri-Leigh teach others to recognize and release physical symptoms of fear, and be a “Perspective Enhancer?”

25 minutes 20 seconds: What can help us know we are enough and be the brightest beings that we are?

With love and all the autumnal sunshine flinging its way to you,🍂🍁✨🌞

Suzy

PS. I first read about Synaesthesia through the gorgeous work of artist Philippa Stanton and you can find her here.

And the full quote from Xavier Dagba:

If you expect your intuition to always "feel safe", odds are it will often remain elusive.

The main intention of your intuition is to expand your awareness and to realign you with truth.

It will feel unsafe if you are afraid of the consequences of embracing truth.

💫Once upon a time, there was an enchanted series, where folk gathered to hear the tales of creators who bravely faced, conquered, and continued to conquer, the demons of fear, thus revealing their magical gifts, skills, and true essence to the world.✨

I’ve been sitting with wondrous souls—artists, travelers of distant lands, weavers of words, capturers of light, coaches, practitioners, and wise teachers—each one a character of great inspiration whom I deeply admire.

In this mystical realm, I believe wholeheartedly that our destined success is but a matter of time, so long as we remain steadfast, follow the nudges of our hearts, and keep leaning into the things that bring lightness and joy to our souls.

Chapter Three 🪄

“The processes I teach my clients get into the deep programming that runs their lives. Up to 95% of human behavior is governed by subconscious programs.” - Scott Fox

Scott Fox — Who is he? Well, aside from having the coolest name on the planet, he’s the founder of the Champion’s Playbook, where he specializes in helping athletes play their best by removing mental and emotional blocks using novel techniques from the world of energy psychology.

But Scott is so much more than that. Having confronted so many of his own fears, he has a profound understanding, not just of the body’s subtle energy systems, but also of how we can begin to create from a place of play and freedom.

This year, Scott will be traveling to Ukraine to present to a large group of psychologists and practitioners who specialize in helping children during times of war. Keep an eye out for Part 2, where we’ll dive deeper into that journey!

I hope you enjoy this conversation as much as we enjoyed having it.

Connect With Scott

You can book a consultation with Scott here and peruse his website, whilst remembering that Soctt is adept at working with folk from all walks of life, not just in the athletic world.

Any questions about his work or want more information on the Process Healing Method/MAP? You can connect with Scott here: [email protected](703) 624-8265

Listen to Scott’s Podcast

Time Stamps

5:00 - What is the science behind EFT and fear release?

13:00 - The importance of not bypassing pain.

16:45 - How do we break free from the old programming that says pushing harder and being tougher is what brings success? How do we create with more ease and flow?

20:15 - Overcoming resistance and learned hopelessness—how?

24:24 - What is the Process Healing Method, and how can it help us make the unconscious conscious?

26:45 - Why riches are about more than just receiving money.

28:10 - Working with children affected by war in Ukraine.

38:44 - What does it mean to find fulfillment?

47:00 - How do we let go of the struggle and play more with life?

56:00 - Scott shares some news.

1:01:26 - The importance of laughter. 😁

If you enjoyed this Podcast episode please consider liking, sharing or dropping a comment as it really helps to build my community. With so much gratitude.

In creating, the only hard thing is to begin: a grass blade's no easier to make than an oak.

~ James Russell Lowell ~

💫Once upon a time, there was an enchanted series, where folk gathered to hear the tales of creators who bravely faced, conquered, and continued to conquer, the dragons of fear, thus revealing their magical gifts, skills, and true essence to the world.✨

I’ve been sitting with wondrous souls—artists, travelers of distant lands, weavers of words, capturers of light, coaches, practitioners, and wise teachers—each one a character of great inspiration, whom I deeply admire.

In this mystical realm, I believe wholeheartedly that our destined success is but a matter of time, so long as we continue steadfast, following the nudges of our heart, and feeling into the things that bring lightness and merriment for our soul.

Chapter Two🪄

Elevator of The Everyday Quotidian, with bright colours and bold moves, Xanthe Berkeley has long since been a source of JOY and inspiration on my Instagram timeline. Whether cycling along on her yellow bicycle or washing pans from the Sunday roast, Xanthe has a talent for flicking the mundane into magic. 🪄 She has certainly been the inspiration behind so many of my own tinkerings with videos and photographs over the years.

Who is Xanthe Berkeley?🦩

Xanthe is a photographer and video creator based between London UK and Hoi An, Vietnam. Passionate about capturing joy and movement and elevating everyday moments through her work. With experience in lifestyle portrait photography and video production, Xanthe has collaborated with many UK brands creating social media content for many years. She's also dedicated to educating others, offering workshops and online courses & memberships to inspire budding video creators. When she's not creating for brands or teaching, Xanthe enjoys experimenting with many personal projects, like her daily video series on instagram or sharing colourful glimpses of her life.

You can subscribe to Xanthe’s Monthly Newsletter here.

Check out Xanthe’s online courses and other magic on her beautiful website.

And be inspired by the every day moments in Xanthe’s colourful Instagram pages - Xanthe Berkeley, @createvideoswithxanthe, and @xanthevideos.

I know you’re going to love Xanthe’s winsome words of experience.

Time Stamps:

3.14 Was there a moment when fear almost brought you to a halt? How did you overcome that?

12.00 The fear of those we know seeing our content

13.44 How do you overcome “Comparisonitus?”

18.00 The importance of self-awareness in our emotions and thoughts

18.16 How key is community and collaboration?

22.37 Touching on Human Design Strategy. Emma Dunwoody

30.50 How to remain consistent and persistent?

39.20 Balancing Commercial Work With Personal Expression

44.00 What does it mean to create from our authentic self?

45.45 Why do we have an insatiable need to create?

48.35 “Fortune Favours the Brave”

PS. I did a rather botched job on explaining what Human Design is. The following is the explanation according to Emma Dunwoody, Human Design Expert and Behavioral Specialist. I love Emma’s no BS approach and her desire to keep HD accessible to all:

“Human Design is your unique energetic blueprint of how you’re designed to live your fullest potential and in alignment with the universe. It combines the Kabbalistic tree of life, modern astrology, the Chinese I’Ching and Hindu Chakra’s systems together to give you an insight of what your soul is here to bring to the world by living a fully aligned life.

Human design is the ultimate permission slip to be yourself!

Your personalised Human Design Bodygraph is calculated using your exact date, time, and place of birth. The Personality (conscious) side of the chart is calculated at the exact moment of your birth, and the Design (unconscious) side of your chart is calculated exactly 88 days prior to your birth.

Although there are external factors that influence your chart, the actual chart does not change during this lifetime.”

Chapter One

Just over two years ago, I hosted a mindset webinar for the charity I’d ran the London Marathon for in October 2022. Even though the webinar went well and I have a passion for public speaking, what followed was a significant contraction—a trauma response, if you will. It was a shrinking of self and a desire to never be seen or heard again. I actually stayed in bed for several days afterward.

Working through my own crippling fears over the past four years, after a lifetime of suppression and oppression of self, has been an exhilarating, bumpy, and sometimes painful journey. If I can overcome the intense fears that were stored in me, I believe anyone can. I truly believe that.

I also believe that we can trust that our success is inevitable.

I'm excited to be recording a dozen or so conversations that uncover the cogs and wheels of fear when it comes to creating a life we desire and sharing our magic. I'm chatting with some truly inspiring souls whom I admire greatly—artists, globe-trotters, writers, photographers, coaches, practitioners, and teachers.

Today’s conversation with Avril Lobo is wonderful because it feels foundational. Avril has been unstinting in her support, wisdom and love these past couple of years and I have so much respect and gratitude for her.

Avril is a trauma-informed leadership coach for mid to senior leaders, helping them design a meaningful life and career comeback after workplace burnout or PTSD.

Avril is change-maker and cycle-breaker - with a wild inner knowing, huge heart, boundless creativity and joyful essence.

Connect with Avril: https://www.linkedin.com/in/avril-lobo-traumainformed-leadership-coach/ 

I definitely recommend you subscribe to Avril's weekly newsletter: https://coached-by-avril.myflodesk.com/roadtojoy 

About Avril and her work: https://coachedbyavril.com/about 

You can also listen to a chat Avril and I had earlier this year on shame resilience. What does it mean to be trauma informed? And how can we learn  self-trust?

Time Stamps:

2.44: How might fear show up as we create?

10:36 How can unaddressed trauma hamper our creativity - our moving forward?

19.33 Looking at intuition and fear. How can we come to view fear as an ally?

35:55 Mind-body-energy work. How do somatic techniques help?

49.55 How do we cultivate an ‘I am Enough’ attitude and understand that it’s not about doing, doing, doing?

1hr 2 mins: What are values and how can we come to know what our own values are?

1hr 12 mins: How do we create more joy in life so that we can play with life rather than fight with it?

1:17:44: What does leading without a title mean?

1:21:11: The importance of authenticity.

You can listen to my letter here. ☝🏻

This week my lovely mum treated me to the Vincent Van Gogh experience during its final few days of it being exhibited in Liverpool.

Before we’d even entered the exhibition, I felt a huge wave of emotion overcome me and I realized my foolishness in not bringing tissues.

I’ve always felt a deep connection with Van Gogh - a kindred spirit in his relentless perseverance despite countless setbacks.

I relate to his living a life of oil-and-water emotions, the incompatibility of exquisitely loving life one moment and intensely loathing it the next - which, as we know, would ultimately cost him his life.

By the time we got to the huge room where Van Gogh’s paintings come alive from floor to ceiling with animation and music, tears streamed down my face.

Here’s a few things we can all learn from the beautiful being that was Vincent Van Gogh…

The Negative Space

As a little girl I remember in public speaking classes first hearing the quote by Claude Debussy:

Music is the space between the notes.

One of my favourite speakers, Wayne Dyer, spoke of this too:

“It is the space between the notes that makes the music. Without that emptiness, that silence in between, there is no music, only a noise.” 

In art, we might call those pauses, those gaps, negative space.

In various classes and courses in art work I’ve taken over the years we were sometimes invited to draw the space in between the objects rather than the objects themselves. Why?

Because it creates creates a different perspective, emphasising the important parts, or elements.

Writing is the same. Imagine if we didn’t have full stops and commas.

Or, consider, how many times have you been part of a moment’s silence to a past event or person and it’s only then that the emotion starts to bubble up to the surface?

Why is that? It’s because you’ve been given a moment to pause, to ponder and to feel.

So you get the point. Pausing is perhaps the single most important thing to implement when it comes to speech giving for all sorts of reasons that I outline in my Masterclasses and coaching.

If, as David Hockney said, Van Gogh could see space in ways that most can’t, you can bet your bottom dollar he held a unique perspective, and it’s that being able to see things that not everyone is able to that ultimately makes his artwork so deeply moving. Feel into his work and you are feeling into his soul.

If pausing, or minding the gaps, the negative space, is important in speech giving, art work, writing…, how much more so in our everyday life?

How much more so will a mindful moment emphasize the important parts, the important elements of life?

Taking a moment throughout the day to come back to self, to gather back our scattered energy, to breathe deeply, to listen to the rustle of the trees, or rub our finger tips together with such a tension that we can feel the lines, the ridges, ah, this be the stuff of magic. 🪄

As the now famous saying goes:

We don’t meditate to get good at meditation, we mediate to get good at life.

Embrace Your Sensitive Nature

“Melancholy does not hurt, but makes us see things with a holier eye.” - Vincent’s Father.

Van Gogh said: “That is true ‘quiet melancholy’, fine gold…”

Vincent made the verse from 2 Corinthians 6:10 his own personal motto:

“As sorrowful but always rejoicing.”

Back in the days when I would experience crippling depressions a phrase from the Navajo Indians offered comfort. They don’t say: ‘I’m depressed’ but rather, ‘My soul is accompanied by sadness.’

I love that because it ensures depression doesn't define them.

I’m cautious these days of attributing labels to myself, including “I’m a highly sensitive person,” because I find myself not wanting to be defined by anything. We are all complex and multi-faceted beings.

That said, I’m often accompanied by sadness, I am intuitive and I am deeply sensitive and here’s the thing: there’s always such gold to be found in those hues and gradients of me.

I’m here to feel it all. Deeply.

The beauty of Vincent, to my mind, was his depth of soul. He couldn’t have shone his light as brightly as he did if he’d not experienced the intensity of feeling like he did.

When we metabolise the pain, work through it and unravel it, we get to share our unique gifts, offerings and light.

Stars can’t shine without darkness. I doubt Vincent’s Starry Night could ever have come to pass had he not felt life, in all its nuances, colours and shades.

I mean, let’s be real for a second. I hope you are not doing all that inner work just so that you can clear the pain. I hope behind it there is a genuine intent to bring more of your fullness out and to take more of your light out of the dark.

~Xavier Dagba~

It also means that we can be in pain and choose not to suffer. I wonder if Vincent had held out that bit longer, might he have some day fully embodied that Devine conclusion - that knowing that energy flows where attention goes. Because going from the following quote from him, he sure did already know it.

CREATE. CREATE. CREATE.

When you consider the multi-million dollar artist that Vincent is now and yet he never saw a cent of it, well, it’s sort of mind-blowing. And in a way, isn’t that the beauty of it?

He created for creating sakes. He painted prolifically, in spite of it all.

"But what's your ultimate goal, you'll say. That goal will become clearer, will take shape slowly and surely, as the croquis becomes a sketch and the sketch a painting L.]"

To Theo van Gogh, Cuesmes,

22-24 June 1880

It matters little whether we are creating a business, setting a table, writing a letter, baking a cake, or scribbling a quick sketch, creating creates clarity.

It’s in those little moments of flow state that we cultivating a clearer path. It’s in failing forwards, shining our light imperfectly, that we learn to trust the process, or as the Magickal Jim Rajan says, to feel the process. “We take life’s happenings and create with them.” (If you associate with being a sensitive soul or empath, I heart recommend that wee clip from Jim.)

I believe we are here to create our hearts out. However that looks for us. And sometimes, it is the simplest acts of creation that bring the most joy to ourselves, and thus, the world.

“It is alway the simplest piece of art which has practiced the most rigid elimination and is therefore the most difficult to duplicate.”

~ Lust For Life, Irving Stone ~

{I could write a whole article on that quote and speech giving too.}

I’ve long since adored how Van Gogh would often end his letters with a “handshake in thought”. Ahhh.

And I like to think his handshakes were not wet lettuces, but hearty and heartfelt.

{Side note: I always remember someone saying to me many years ago (a man), that my handshakes were so firm that it wasn’t very lady-like. I still can’t roll my eyes back far enough to express my despair at such a silly comment.}

With a super-firm-hearty-handshake in thought,

Suzy

PS. On creating, my mum, who is a master at crochet 🧶 magic, after watching a girl sketching at Port Sunlight recently, felt nudged to buy a sketch pad. I noticed, however, that it has remained on the shelf untouched. So I’ve challenged both her and myself to sketch for 30 days straight. It’s been years since I kept an illustrated journal and it’s a habit I’d like to cultivate once again. It activated gratitude for the magic of the every day.

🎨🖌️🪄

If you’d like to follow our 30 day scribbles, please sign into Substack and check out “Notes” on my publication. They’re so bad they’re good!

By doing this, it also means you could drop me a wee ♥️ or even a comment, which I’d just cherish soooo much. 🪄✨

Armed with innate communication skills, 42 years worth of public speaking classes, and, latterly, certifications in personal performance coaching and Neuro-Linguistic Programming, I'm here to help you elevate your public speaking abilities.

I'm especially passionate about helping individuals speak authentically from the heart and navigate public speaking after much suppression of self.

For further information, if you’d like to me to review a forthcoming speech with you or if you’ve any questions, by all means reach out:

[email protected]

Neuroscience and creativity. Ahh, a dynamic duo that sets my heart alight.

So, despite a rainy, dark and dreary night last Wednesday, the promise of a Seed Talk on The Neuroscience of Creativity beckoned like a sauna after an ice plunge. I wasn’t going to miss it.

It was a two hour talk, a treasure trove of insights, peppered with slides and data. And, like anything, there will always be room for improvement. Here are my top tips for anyone, whether giving a marathon talk or snappy presentation.

Trust me, these gems work wonders, Let's dive in!

Make It Relevant

There was a whirlwind of fantastic information and some rather complex slides in the Seed Talk. But what if there was a moment where the speaker turned and asked: “Now then, how does this relate to you, you the crocheter, the writer, the artist, the baker, the candlestick maker ( you get the point ;o) )? Well, let me tell you.”

Now that’s a game-changer.

Suddenly, you realize how all this knowledge translates into your world, igniting your mind, your creativity, like never before. That's the power of making it personal.

It’s one thing relaying information, it’s quite a skill to enable the listener to go away with a brain lit up because that information was made relevant to them personally.

Master The Art Of Timing

This is so important but frequently overlooked.

In the organisation I once belonged to, one of the talks each week ended with an invitation to the audience to make a comment. The comment was to be 30 seconds or less - a challenge for yours truly!

Always with some personal development book on the go or some analogy I’d kept filed, I’d yearn to offer as much inspiration as humanly possible and I’d practice the heck out of that thing all week so that a 3 minute comment was whittled down to 30 seconds. It meant being ruthless with every last word that was surplus to requirements. I smarted at the ridiculousness of it at the time but I’m grateful now for how it enabled me to edit ruthlessly.

Now, obviously, a 30 second morsel can be practiced relentlessly in little time. A two hour talk, however, is going to take a lot more application.

But here's the thing: practice makes perfect. By honing those skills, trimming the fat from your words, you can deliver a knockout punch of impact. Sure, it might sting a bit to cut out things you are passionate about, but boy, does it sharpen your message.

For example, the talk last Wednesday evening was sadly rushed towards the end on the very things that I’d really looked forward to hearing, things like mindset and the flow state. Too much time had been spent wading through the history of creativity when all I craved was the juicy neuroscience bits.

As you rehearse, with a stopwatch, you'll quickly spot the fluff and trim it down to the good stuff. It's all about finding that sweet spot where your message shines brightest.

Have A Crystal Clear Agenda

If you want your audience to leave with their minds blown, you better have a road map to get them there. Think of it like planning a road trip - you wouldn’t hit the highway without the destinations in mind, right?

So jot down the three or five or ten (depending on the length of your talk) golden nuggets you wish to engrave into brains. This will be your compass as you navigate through your talk.

And when you kick things off, briefly tease them with a sneak peak of what’s to come, those nuggets. It’s like rattling a bag of nuts in front of a hungry squirrel - it’s really going to pique interest.

Get Your Crowd In On The Action

The speaker last week had some fantastic things going on with this, for example, a huge QR code on the screen enabled everyone to answer a few questions on their phone, the responses then appeared in real time on the screen on the stage. Tech-savvy engagement!

We love to be involved and brought in on things. It’s how we are wired. We like to be acknowledged. Comedians are frequently masters of this too. So play with how you can bring in your audience on the experience. Focus in on an individual or, like with the QR magic, have the entire audience answer questions but do get them involved. It’s the secret sauce to keeping them on their toes and hanging on your every word.

Remember this: your listeners have most likely shown up because they are interested in your topic so to then take it a step further and involve them is to turn your presentation into a tantalizing buffet, where they're not just eyeing the dishes from afar but rolling up their sleeves, diving in, and savouring every delectable bite of knowledge.

Sprinkle Comedy Gold Like Fairy Dust

Alright, let's debunk a myth right off the bat: you don't need a comedy club genius to dish out some laughs. Case in point? The Neuroscience talk I attended brought all the laughter with a trailer for the classic flick Groundhog Day.

Picture it: chuckles and chortles start bouncing off the walls like popcorn in a microwave. Even as an audience member, there’s something so blooming satisfying about having everyone light up like that. But as a speaker, it’s like pouring maple syrup on pancakes—pure satisfaction!

That film clip wasn't just for giggles; it was a masterclass in mindset. We watched Bill Murray's character wrestle with the horror of reliving the same day on loop, only to flip the script and turn his plight into a power move - which is ultimately what broke the nightmare. Talk about a lightbulb moment that I’ll never forget because it made me smile so much.

So, my friend, what tickles your funny bone? Whether it's dad jokes, slapstick comedy, or witty one-liners, trust your gut. If it's got you cracking up, chances are it'll spread like wildfire, lighting up the room, melting away tension and, perhaps more importantly, delivering an important point like a slam dunk.

Bring in a Personal Story

The doctor giving the talk on the neuroscience of creativity? Total pro. Confidence for days, poise that could rival a ballerina, and enough knowledge to make Einstein do a double take.

But what if I told you she could've taken her talk from good to unforgettable with just one magic ingredient? 🥁 Cue the drumroll, please: a personal story.

When all the brainy stuff gets tangled up in the threads of a speaker's own life, it's like fireworks on New Year’s Eve - explosive!

Good storytelling isn't just a skill; it's a superpower, unleashing all the feel-good chemicals like dopamine (think being glued to your social media feed - you can have your audience glued to your every word in the same way), oxytocin (increases trust and empathy - especially if it’s a vulnerable share), and endorphins ((which, guess what? Increases creativity!).

So, next time you're drowning in data, why not toss in a personal anecdote? Trust me, your audience will devour it with the ease of gobbling candy floss and walk away remembering every last detail.

What stories do you remember that have driven home a point that you’ll never forget? Let me know, hit reply, or pop in the comments.

May you speak from your heart this week,

With So Much Love and Gratitude,

Suzy 🫶🏻

PS. Sorry for all the food analogies today! It’s because I write this with a rumbling tummy. I’m off in search for food…

When you subscribe you can now receive two free gifts from yours truly. A wee NLP meditation and a free pdf poster!

Growing up, and indeed throughout my life, I attended weekly classes in public speaking. As a female in the organization I belonged to, I wasn't allowed to take on 'teaching' roles, which involved standing and speaking solo. However, women were permitted to handle subsidiary parts (patriarchy at its finest), and, particularly as a youth, I loved those assignments.

The pulling together of information, turning it into a natural sounding conversation starting with a captivating introduction, and hoping to, in some way or other encourage, uplift or inspire the audience (even though to have verbalized it like that back then, I’d have feared sounding woefully convoluted) was something I excelled in.

Much like Toastmasters, these speaking assignments came with feedback. There would be things commended and something to work on. The consistent advice for me?

Pausing. Always pausing.

It wasn't just nerves; it was my eagerness to pack in too much material within the allotted time. I would rush through, missing the impact of a well-placed pause.

Take a Pause

In this moment, pause. Inhale for 4, hold for 7, exhale for 8. Feels good, doesn't it? Notice your body - any tension, tightness in those shoulders, neck, jaw? Pausing, even for a moment, grounds us, centers our energy, and reclaims our power.

How does this relate to putting our voice into the world?

In exactly the same way.

We are more grounded. We’ll be more poised in our message and this makes our voice and communication more powerful.

Silence Speaks Volumes

Recently, before a speech, I failed to take a moment to pause. Make no mistake, this impacts the whole affair. Think about it. Subconsciously, when you see a speaker who takes a deliberate moment to pause, perhaps check the mic, and take a breath, it exudes confidence and authority (even if they are not feeling those things).

When To Pause?

After a joke. Give the audience time to laugh and circle back their attention to you.

After a powerful point or quote. Allowing it to sink in for a moment adds impact.

After asking a question. Gift your audience time to ponder on what you have just asked.

But How?

The things is, how to do that when nerves are jangling and we are rushing through like it’s some sort of SAS operation - wanting to get in, get the job done and get out?

👉🏻In the hours leading up to a speech set your alarm each hour and for 60 seconds or two minutes practice coming back to breath. Focus on a sound and keep coming back to that sound, or the sound of your breath.

If you are unable to close your eyes, focus on something in front of you, what is the colour, texture, shape, keep gently bringing yourself back to that focus.

Why is this important before even giving a speech, surely the important thing is whether you can deliver the pause in the speech?

Well, these mindfulness practices regulate the nervous system. I’ve gone into speeches without taking the time in the hours beforehand to pause, ground and center myself, and I’ve noted a huge difference.

👉🏻Try a guided breath-work meditation too - I’ll pop a link to two of my favourites below.

Economy of Words, Breathing Room

On a practical level, practice, practice, practice and do so with a timer, allowing time for pauses. If you are struggling to stay on time or feel there’s no room for those all important pauses, get economical with words, sentences and stories. What’s superfluous to requirements? What could be taken out? By doing this you are leaving yourself plenty of breathing room - quite literally.

One well placed pause can offer more power, punch and import than several quotes, jokes or anecdotes.

If nerves hinder your ability to pause, practice counting your inhale and exhale.. Focus on counting (silently) and let your mind ease into the rhythm. The count forces your mind off any awkwardness and simultaneously allows you to breathe.

Hello Heart, Hello World

Say hello to your heart. Literally, say “Hello Heart!”. I love this expression. I’ve started using it in my meditations. It gently drops me from my mind and into the body whilst also enabling me to remember that it is from there that I desire to speak from and to.

This goes for everyday interactions too. Before posting a comment online, for example, say hello to your heart. This can aid us to question what is my intention here? Am I merely wanting to espouse knowledge and opinion or will this comment breathe out peace into the world.

In Conclusion: The Art of Silence

Claude Debussy said: Music is the space between the notes.

And so too with impactful speaking. There’s tremendous power in the space between the words.

So, the next time you stand before an audience, type out a comment or put your voice out into the world, remember the art of the silence.

In that pause, you'll find your strength, your voice, and the essence of authentic communication.

Pausing isn't just about catching your breath; it's about reclaiming your power.

And Pause.

Until next time, remember to pause, breathe. Ahhhhhhhh. Exhaaaaaale.

With Love and Warmth,

Suzy

PS. As promised, links to two of my favourite breath-work meditations:

Soma Breath

Dr Joe Dispenza

When you subscribe you can now receive two free gifts from yours truly. A wee meditation and free pdf poster! I know, I know, I’m excited too. It’s only taken me 12 months to sort out my welcome email! 😁

Armed with innate communication skills, 42 years worth of public speaking classes, and, latterly, certifications in personal performance coaching and Neuro-Linguistic Programming, I'm here to help you elevate your public speaking abilities.

I'm especially passionate about helping individuals speak authentically from the heart and navigate public speaking after much suppression of self.

For further information and if you’ve any questions, by all means reach out:

[email protected]