The Authenticity Coach

Is comparison only about being better than or worse than someone else? Rather than always striving to be or have something better, might you pursue something different? Could comparison to a role model serve to inspire & help you grow?

Are you recognizing how far you have come -- or are you only measuring how much farther you yet have to go to reach your goal? Do you move out the goalpost each time a goal is met? How much is enough?

Do you have talent dysphoria? Learn to watch out for the comparison time warp. Overcome the urge to be a Goldilocks -- someone who is hyper-vigilantly comparing meaningless things, while neglecting to discern what matters most.

Expand how to think about & approach comparison, so that you can live more joyously & within your value system.

You want to scale your business. Whatever your vision of successfully scaling your business, creating space -- & protecting that space -- is likely the "magic key" to entering the next level of your business. When we let go of what no longer serves us, we create space for what does.

Learn to identify your "time termites" -- those seemingly small & harmless takers of your time that over the years destroy what you are working so hard to build. What might you need to turn away from in order to create space for the new & bigger experiences that are meant for you?

You are feeling stuck -- in your career, in a relationship with a loved one, regarding your social life, about your health & fitness or in some other area of life. It may feel really horrible, or you may just be in an unsatisfying rut. You are telling yourself that you do not have a choice, that you are stuck. But you do have choices. We always have choices.

Learn practical steps to getting unstuck by: 1) brainstorming many possibilities, 2) narrowing your focus to clarify what is ideal & 3) identifying your dealbreakers. Create custom ways to filter possibilities to screen for your must-haves. You have more choices than you think you do!

Is your desire a fantasy, a dream or a goal? What are the differences? Why does it matter? Learn what distinguishes a fantasy from a dream & a dream from a goal. Move beyond narrow limitations & be open to more -- & perhaps even infinite -- possibilities.

What is that relentless Voice in your head -- the one that criticizes & badgers you nonstop, endlessly ruminates about what happened & constantly worries about what might happen?

Learn tips & techniques to tame your unwanted, intrusive thoughts, be more intentional about where you place your attention & feel more at peace in the present moment.

How do you manage discomfort, pain & burden -- whether a pebble in your shoe or boulders on your back?

When life is "too much" & we feel "off," we need a way to re-regulate in order to restore balance, physically & emotionally.

How do you self-soothe? Are you releasing (in a way that is solving or easing the root problem or at least letting out the energy that is built up inside)? Or are you relieving the pain & pressure by escaping it by numbing or distracting?

What would be more satisfying & sustainable ways to self-soothe?

There are three human instinctual drives -- self-preservation, one-to-one bonding (a.k.a. sexual) & social (community belonging). We all have all three of these drives. But for each of us, one of the three is our primary & dominant focus, one is a secondary focus & one is largely disowned.

Being aware of these drives & how they influence how we as well as others feel & act can help us to better understand & relate to loved ones & colleagues. Greater awareness can also guide us towards career roles & social interactions that feel like a natural fit, in flow & fulfilling.

Knowing our disowned instinct can also support our growth. It can help us to expand our perspective , create more balance & live a life that is healthier, richer in experiences & more impactful.

How aligned are your efforts with your values? What do you value highly, yet give relatively low focus, energy & time? Where are you expending high effort & resources for something you feel is of relatively low value? Why is this? Is it a "should" rather than your own top value? Is it because you believe the high effort in a low value area is necessary to secure a top value that relies upon it? Or are your boundaries too lax as to protecting your time, energy & money for what matters most?

Life feels limited, boring & even oppressive when we ignore or reject the expression of parts of who we are. What aspects of yourself are you disowning? Explore practical ways to identify the emotions, desires, behaviors & activities that you are not allowing yourself to experience. How could you incorporate your full self into your life?

What is "the high achiever's black hole"? It is where you are exceptionally good at your work -- & receiving praise & pay for it -- but your spirit is being sucked out of you. No one is coming to save you. You must recognize your part in creating & maintaining your circumstances. And you need to be clear about what you do love to do -- & how that ideal work ties to the key parts of the brand for which you are already known & valued. Communicate your superpowers & passions in "shooting star statements," so those in power can support you in rising into a fulfilling role.