Remember, always hire the Australian for any job opening you're looking to fill. They work hard, and you don't have to worry about them calling in sick every time they get a little cough.
Case in point - an Australian man recently slashed his face open with a chainsaw while working on a farm in Ballarat, Victoria, and rather than sitting down and whinging about it, he simply tied his head up with cloth and drove himself to a nearby hospital.
Some might ask, why didn't he just call the local equivalent of 911? Well, he was unable to call for an ambulance because he had sliced his tongue in half!
When Bill Singleton, 68, reached the hospital, doctors discovered that when he had lost control of his chainsaw, it cut through his face as far back as his wisdom teeth, yet just missed his carotid artery and larynx.
Fortunately, Bill has said that his accident had not put him off working with chainsaws in the future.
And that's why you always hire the Australian!
Meanwhile, the world continued to lurch from one ridiculous story to another:
* A Chinese fire department freed a man whose head became stuck inside a washing machine while he was attempting to repair the appliance.
* A real estate agent in Canada gained Internet notoriety for her unique ad campaign that featured a photo of her appearing to shoot lasers from her eyes.
* A Chinese driver was caught on video holding his IV drip stand out the window with one hand and drinking what appears to be a beer with the other hand.
* An Indian man whose hair measures 62 feet long said he is applying to be recognized by Guinness World Records.
* A student driver in London managed to add to the cost of their gold-plated Maserati supercar by earning a ticket with a poor parking job.
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