During a dream vacation in Indonesia, monkey steals woman’s camera and takes selfies, giving them the finger... Family spots baby possum crawling underneath bar at Applebee’s… Woman orders size 16 bikini bottom online, is sent 2 size 8s instead... Retired clergyman enjoys life as pornstar at age 85… Cardiologist left 57 inch metal inch metal wire left inside person, didn’t know for 10 years... 4 year old boy hopped into great grandfather’s car, drives mile and a half to convenience store for candy... Chase suspect in custody after attempting to flee after being trapped in mobile home park… Mariah Carey fan who requested birthday cake with the star’s face surprised when she received Madam Curey instead

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Fluids leaking from a decomposing body of a man who died into a restaurant below that is now closed… Howard’s Pizza delivery truck stolen and taken for a joy ride by drunken man…  New Deli landfill keeps growing and will soon stand taller than the Taj Mahal… 81 year old bicyclist is filing a lawsuit against San Luis Obispo airport after being blown off his bike by a jet engine taking off… A woman got stuck in a child sized car and had to be cut out with a butter knife… The 2 guys that used a hammer to try to get into a spy shop aren’t very good criminals as the store was under surveillance… Man goes missing while test driving a motorcycle, they have found the motorcycle and all his belongings but not him…  A man was arrested Saturday morning after striking 2 police horses and 2 officers… ‘Zombie” snake, an Eastern Hognose, will play dead if they feel threatened by rolling on its back, opening its mouth and writhing around.

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A Florida Woman is behind bars after making her boyfriend’s balls bleed…  Two students admitted to hanging fake penises on the front of their school… A woman got a DUI while driving a PowerWheels truck... A man is suing a Cryonics company to get his dad’s head back... A 6 year old girl was stabbed in the face by a 35 year old woman while attending a birthday party... A passenger on a UK-Pakistan flight caused major delays by opening the Emergency Door thinking it was the bathroom… A man is searching for a way to move forward after Kansas City officers dumped out his grandmother… A father turned himself in for stealing his son’s identity and ruining his credit... An 81 year old Florida man claims he lost a portion of his thumb when his Jaguar closed on his hand.

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Woman carrying a baby assaulted another woman on a train... Airport in South China has warned passengers against throwing coins at planes for good luck...  Florida motorcyclist struck by lightning and died... Teenage Boy had a rare surgery after a tooth was found in his testicle… Woman had a deer enter her house... Naked man jumped on the car of a woman driving her kids…  Medical examiner was suspended for two weeks for making inappropriate comments when handling a body… 46 ice cream trucks were seized from owners for accruing $4.5 million in traffic tickets... Man in central Florida poured salt on the floor of Walmart go eliminate the evil spirits around him.  

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Teen caught speeding in Canada going 106 mph, urgently needed to use bathroom after eating too many hot wings. 19 year old Utah driver struck 11 year old girl on scooter because she was white, claims “we all have to die sometime.” 911 dispatcher received call that group of police officers were stuck on elevator in building 911 operators was in. PA resident believes unusually high number of tornados is due to traffic circles. Residents of Las Vegas make complaints of airplane door falling out of sky and hitting car. Man tore open screen door, crawled through window, unscrewed lightbulbs and took shoes off. Grabbed 3 alcoholic beverages from fridge, strolled through house drinking them. Stripped clothes, sat next to sleeping homeowner sleeping on couch, waving fireplace poker. Home owner left sickened after security equipment salesman took a dump in her yard. Universal’s Water Park closed after lifeguards and people reported shocks while swimming pools due to electrical problem. Naked Florida man tried to enter convenience store; urinating on locked doors and police officers. Public safety officials capture third alligator in Pittsburgh this month. Utah man has been arrested for allegedly threatening several members of congress, making over 2,000 phone calls to Capitol Hill.

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Boat trip-captain drunk and drug infused threatened to shoot everybody on the boat… Alligator came on to beach picnic, ate entire bowl of guacamole…  Woman found out lump was parasitic worm instead of brain cancer… Young woman dies taking photos of the falls, lost footing and fell over edge... Deputy got into gun fight over feeding of feral cats… Woman from Scotland waxed armpits before vacation, stuck her arms to her side... Police had to tranquilize two of three deer who crashed into window of retirement community while woman was inside... Homeowner has huge swastika in front yard, neighbors very displeased.

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Woman unhappy with way her McChicken sandwich was prepared assaults pregnant McDonald’s worker after she went back to make the sandwich herself...  PA police called to get bear that jumped into pool on Sunday morning...  Safe unable to be unlocked for 40 years finally opened by museum visitor...  Only took man 2 minutes to open safe…  Florida man arrested for covering girlfriend in ketchup while saying  that’s what you get bitch…   Cops looking for men who tried to rob ATM machine but ended up welding it together... Group of Alabama high school students attacked on river...  NYC supermarket owner arrested for arson because he was threatened by another store’s prices...  Woman pulls gun on man over argument of who would be next for karaoke...  58 year old woman said roommate spat on her because she refused to flush toilet after using it... 

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Greenwich Village man was robbed by man he had met on Grnder: he couldn’t yell for help because he had a ball gag in his mouth… Mother and two daughters recovering after a man broke into their home, removed his clothes and tried to use a hammer to break into the room… 63 year old man arrested after pulling a gun on an Amazon delivery man and made him rake the driveway… 74 year old injured hiker was being helicopter lifted off the mountain when the lift she was in started spinning out of control… Florida drinking game: if you lost you had to stab yourself with a screwdriver… Dressed in just his underpants and holding a digeridoo a man in Adelaide chased a burglar from his home... Argument over $2000 dollars led man to assault brother with a guitar, a snare drum and a microphone stand in a motel… Man in Alabama got a pee sample from Amazon instead of the shower curtain he ordered... Mom from Illinois bought a shirt for her 3 year old daughter from a China based company with frog and toad on it and when it got there underneath it the shirt read “eff the police” underneath the picture.

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Man tells police he was trying to shoot bear but boyfriend took bullet.  Bear caught on camera wandering around Missouri church after teachers left door open.  New Zealand who performed a pants-down haka with in the street appeared in court. Chest of a 60 year old man burst into flames during surgery.  Dr. Mark Forest watched man go into cardiac arrest after motorcycle accident and gave him open heart surgery on the side of the road.  Real Estate sign washed away during Hurricane Sandy washed up on a beach in France.  Fuming wife bit hungover husband’s penis after he refused to join her for breakfast.

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Head teacher who used school funds to turn his office into his sex dungeon, defrauded school of $200,000… Principal at holy catholic public was arrested in DC on Friday for being intoxicated and refusing to pay bill at strip club... Elementary school is Scranton was closed after someone broke in, got naked and vandalized it... Florida high school teacher wrote WTF is this? on student’s homework... Idaho Republican chair charged with first degree felony for being found pleasuring himself in a bush while peering into a window at his ex-wife... A woman with no training or certification worked as a nurse for 20 years, turned out to not be a nurse at all... Man fell off moped, bruised genitals, days long erection… Man crashed car while under  the influence of morpheme, weed, and heroin after losing control from an attack of sea creatures…. Florida man faces manslaughter after fatally shooting a woman during a sex act…

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