The Cartoncast

The Cartoncast

By Ben and ZaneComedyTV & Film
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The Cartoncast episodes

  • 209 - The Ren & Stimpy Show
    Ben and Zane were going on an absolutely wild and unhinged adventure. Just
    incredible stuff happening that you need to hear to believe. However, first
    you have to listen to an excruciating story about their recent thoracic
    surgery. But first, a word from our sponsors: Lice!
    1 hr 28 min
  • The Ninth Annual Cartony Awards
    Welcome back to the Cartony Awards! This year featured some heavy hitters
    and surprising dark horses (but not a real dark horse that’s cruel). And as
    we round the corner toward our final year, we’re left to ponder the big
    questions. When are they going to fire Great Teacher Onizuka for sexual
    harassment? How many Sheldons are there? And just what is it about Flo from
    Progressive? It’s a jam-packed year of equally stupid conversations from
    the Cartoncast, and we humbly invite you to listen in.
    Our categories this year:
    * Best Intro
    * Show That we Like the Best Despite Hating a Good Half of it
    * Best Callback
    * Best Example of Random Humor
    * Worst Teen
    * Best Conspiracy Theory
    * Best Voice Actor Spotlight
    * Character Most Immune from Consequences
    * '“We’ve Been Meaning to Get to That” Award
    * Best Hot Take
    * Best Show
    2 hr 33 min
  • 208 - Schoolhouse Rock!
    Ben and Zane were excited to take on the role of substitute teachers at the
    local Podcasting high school. On the day of, they realized that they didn’t
    know any facts! The Cartoncasters bravely wheeled in that old tube TV on
    the rickety wheeled platform and set up a marathon of Schoolhouse Rock! Did
    it meet the curriculum? Hell no. Did it still hold up? Yes… AND.
    1 hr 22 min
  • 207 - Great Teacher Onizuka
    The Cartoncast has an image to uphold, you know. We can’t just have any old
    podcaster on staff, coming in half-cocked off of a bender, ranting about
    upskirt shots in video games and confessing actual, literal crimes on
    camera. But every so often you run into a true problem in the podcast world
    that can’t be solved with a meeting or a suspension. No, sometimes you need
    a man like Onizuka, who finds the people responsible for trolls hacking
    into our website, and reminds them about proper netiquette via German
    suplex. Just, uh… don’t talk to him on bring your daughter to work day.
    * The Cask of Amontillado
    * Professional Casual Network
    * Happosai is the least okay thing about Ranma
    * Early Installment Weirdness
    * Japan’s relationship with suicide
    * Co-coconut gun!
    * Waiting for Superman
    * …and Waitin’ for Superman
    * Ugly Bastard tag
    * Onizuka Faces
    * Garbage Roof
    1 hr 25 min
  • 206 - Axe Cop
    Things were rough for the Podcaster Cops down at the station. The legendary
    Axe Cop - yes, that Axe Cop - was making them look bad! It was up to Law
    Cop to give them a leg up and show them the beat. Despite learning several
    hundred secret kicks and foiling the impending Shark/Tiger war, they still
    couldn’t keep up with Axe Cop, and were forced into early retirement. It’s
    just as well, though. Rumor has it that the missions were being given out
    by a five year old.
    Andy Sipowicz is Flute Cop in a different life
    * Calvinball
    * Burnt Face Man is very from the flash animation era
    * Cromartie High School - the humming episode
    * Jimmy Olsen is a Lizardman because the writer felt like it
    1 hr 31 min
  • 205 - Bootlegg'd - The Super Mario Bros. Movie
    The Super Mario Bros. Movie, and Nintendo in general, does not need
    defenders or simps. You are allowed to like or dislike this movie on its
    own merits, no more and no less than The Godfather. But in the context of
    the previous Mario Bros film, other video game adaptations in general, and
    Illumination Studio’s works, this movie is a miracle. The Mario pillars of
    simplicity, spectacle, and polish are all on display here, so sit back and
    listen as the Cartoncast takes in a movie that is at once exactly what
    you’d expect, but also makes most of the shots it takes. Let’s a go.
    1 hr 49 min
  • 204 - Dan Vs.
    Ben and Zane were having a hard time coming up with proper retribution
    against their old foe, the Moon (long story), and asked Josh for help.
    After an extensive summary of recent Japanese Game Show events, he quoted
    from the Book of Dan: “You don’t need to have a reason to hate, nor a plan,
    nor a goal. Just let it out into the world, and justice will provide.” So
    they gathered up some rocks and took turns throwing them off the roof of
    the building, hoping some would make it to the moon. They did end up taking
    down Sasquatch, but that’s a fascinating story for another time.
    2 hr 2 min
  • One-Legg'd - Mob Psycho 100
    In the fallout of One Punch Man’s miraculous rise and then slow fall, Mob
    Psycho was somewhat overlooked by the anime community for a time. Which is
    a shame, because by all accounts it surpasses One’s more famous work. Ben
    and James gush unceasingly about this bowl-cut havin’ miracle child and his
    master, the greatest psychic of the modern era.
    * Buff guys help nerdy guy meme, specifically the wholesome versions
    * Mother’s basement - Mob Psycho season 2 intro
    * “The apple hasn’t noticed it’s been cut”
    * GTO!
    * That one scene - “It’s okay to run away”
    * Dragon of the Darkness Flame
    * Spoon Bending means Psychic
    * Reigen Spinoff Manga
    1 hr 31 min
  • 203 - Captain Planet and the Planeteers
    Ben and Zane didn’t have a clue why they were recruited to handle this oil
    spill, but they knew who to bring in: Ian. He came on board and told them
    that what they really needed was a guy by the name of Captain Planet. They
    brought in Gaia to give them a couple power rings, then got the last ones
    by some unsavory methods, but eventually they were able to summon Captain
    Planet. He took one look at the problem, told them that “The Power is
    Yours,” and disappeared. They took the L and hoped that Mother Nature could
    take one more for the team.
    * They didn’t bother copyrighting “Duke Nukem”
    * Ted Turner: the least bad billionaire?
    * The Power of Attorney is Yours
    * Black Dynamite
    * “Dune Sting Underwear” Safesearch OFF
    * Environmentalists vs Captain Planet
    * Environmentalists, Nuclear Power, and Politics: IT’S COMPLICATED
    * RIP Lance Reddick
    * Dan Harmon didn’t like Vindicators
    * I am only doing a cursory look-up of Environmental Sabotage and
    Eco-terrorism
    * East Palestine, Ohio, train derailment
    * Wizard People Dear Reader Uncle Porkflaps
    * Soup on Paintings vs. Bank Chainings
    * Mona Lisa smaller than you think
    * Energy Consumption of Bitcoin
    * Gas stove culture war bullshit
    1 hr 47 min
  • 202 - Zoids: New Century
    The following is a choice segment from an interview between Bit Cloud,
    pilot of the Liger Zero from Blitz Team, and the Cartoncasters.
    “Look man, life’s not so easy in the post-apocalypse. Which post
    apocalypse? Not important. At least, not any more important than bustin’ up
    some fools with my mad sick liger zero moves. I’ve never met a mech I
    didn’t want to fight, and I never didn’t fight a mech I haven’t wanted to
    beat. So let’s get this show on the road, pardner! That growling either
    means my Liger wants to wrassle, or that I’m hungry - and I already ate!
    Ate what? From what food sources? Man, just from those questions I can tell
    you aint from around here.”
    * Stroheim from JoJo
    * Model ships in bottles
    * Goldar
    * I’m just an ex-con…
    * Iron Reaver Soul Stealer!
    * Brawndo
    * EVs and IVs
    1 hr 18 min

About The Cartoncast

From the publisher's feed

As we describe it, this is the '8th grade lit paper' of cartoon podcasts. It involves a deliberate investigation to what makes old cartoons tick, and a healthy respect for digression. Also eggs.