The Christian Women's Journey to Healing & Identity in Christ | Faith-Based Emotional Healing

Send a text

You start every January with a Bible reading plan. Three weeks later, you're drowning in Leviticus and beating yourself up for failing again. Sound familiar?

If you've ever wondered what's wrong with your brain, why you can't stay consistent with spiritual practices, or if God is disappointed in you for struggling so much, this episode is for you.

In this vulnerable conversation, I share my journey of getting diagnosed with ADHD this year and how it completely transformed my relationship with God. No more performing. No more forcing formulas that were never designed for how my brain works. Just freedom to meet God in ways that actually honor how He made me.

In this episode, we talk about:

• Why consistency in traditional spiritual disciplines feel impossible for ADHD brains
• The shame and guilt cycle that keeps you stuck
• How my ADHD diagnosis was actually an answered prayer
• What it looks like to do quiet time differently every single day (and why that's okay)
• Practical ways to connect with God when your brain craves novelty
• How to let go of external expectations and lean into your intimate relationship with God
• Why struggling doesn't mean something is wrong with you spiritually

Whether you're officially diagnosed with ADHD or just deeply relate to these struggles, there's freedom waiting for you. Your brain isn't the problem. The expectations are.

BITTERSWEET NEWS: This is our last episode with co-host Jasmine Barcia for this season as she enters a new season of calling 🥺 We're so grateful for the journey we've shared together ❤️

🎙️ Subscribe to the podcast so you don’t miss future episodes.

🎁 Sign up for my FREE mini-course on how to process your emotions God's way - without shutting down or spiraling.

📞 Book a FREE discovery call to explore 1:1 coaching with me!

📧 Join my weekly newsletter "Holy Unraveling" for Christian emotional healing encouragement in your inbox.

▶️ Follow me on Instagram @melchanity and Youtube @melissachancoaching for more encouragement and resources.

Send a text

Have you ever felt like you're one missed prayer away from disappointing God completely?

If you've spent days obsessing over whether an intrusive thought means you've lost your salvation, or if you confess the same sin repeatedly because you're terrified you didn't "mean it enough,” you might be struggling with religious scrupulosity.

This form of OCD can come off as strong spiritual devotion, but underneath, you're drowning in fear, guilt, and the exhausting work of trying to earn a love that's already yours.

In this episode, I'm sharing my own story of spiritual burnout when God called me to intercession from 2-3 AM every night until I physically crashed, and what I learned about the difference between conviction and condemnation.

You'll discover why "trying harder" only reinforces the obsessive cycle, how to recognize if you're experiencing religious OCD, and the counterintuitive path to freedom: learning to rest in God's grace instead of performing for His approval.

This is Christian emotional healing that honors both your faith and your mental health. If you're exhausted from walking on eggshells with God, this conversation will meet you with the warmth, truth, and Christian encouragement you've been desperate for.

👉 Ready to process your emotions God's way? Grab my FREE 3-day mini-course "From Triggered to Anchored" (link below) and discover how to move from fear to freedom in Christ.

🎙️ Subscribe to the podcast so you don’t miss future episodes.

🎁 Sign up for my FREE mini-course on how to process your emotions God's way - without shutting down or spiraling.

📞 Book a FREE discovery call to explore 1:1 coaching with me!

📧 Join my weekly newsletter "Holy Unraveling" for Christian emotional healing encouragement in your inbox.

▶️ Follow me on Instagram @melchanity and Youtube @melissachancoaching for more encouragement and resources.

Send a text

When the intrusive thoughts won't stop. When prayer becomes compulsion. When you're doing everything "right" and still drowning.

This is one of those episodes where we go there... to the places most Christians are afraid to talk about. My co-host Jasmine shares her raw, unfiltered journey through intrusive thoughts so dark and perverse that she couldn't even be around children. Pedophilic imagery. Sexual thoughts. The kind of thoughts that made her question her salvation, her character, and whether God could possibly still love her.

And here's the kicker... she was doing everything right. Praying. Fasting. Deliverance conferences. Scripture all over her walls. But the intrusive thoughts wouldn't stop.

What we cover:

• The difference between intrusive thoughts and sin (spoiler: they're not the same)
• Religious scrupulosity: when spiritual disciplines and practices become compulsions that keep you trapped
• Why your brain attaches intrusive thoughts to what you love most
• The moment God asked Jasmine to stop striving and what happened next
• How rest (not more effort) became the pathway to freedom
• The dangerous assumption that your thoughts = your character

This isn't about tips to think more positively or trying harder. This is about a God who's more interested in you understanding His love than in you performing your way to freedom.

If you've ever felt tormented by your own mind, isolated in shame, or exhausted from doing all the "right Christian things" with no relief... this one's for you.

Your intrusive thoughts are not who you are. They're not sin. And they don't disqualify you from God's nearness.

Resources mentioned: Exposure and Response Prevention (ERP) therapy for OCD

If you're struggling with intrusive thoughts or OCD, please reach out to a licensed mental health professional who specializes in OCD treatment. You don't have to walk this alone.

🎙️ Subscribe to the podcast so you don’t miss future episodes.

🎁 Sign up for my FREE mini-course on how to process your emotions God's way - without shutting down or spiraling.

📞 Book a FREE discovery call to explore 1:1 coaching with me!

📧 Join my weekly newsletter "Holy Unraveling" for Christian emotional healing encouragement in your inbox.

▶️ Follow me on Instagram @melchanity and Youtube @melissachancoaching for more encouragement and resources.

Send a text

What does following Jesus actually look like when you're clinically depressed?

Not the "had a rough week" kind of down... the kind where getting out of bed feels impossible, joy feels foreign, and even praying feels like too much.

In this raw and honest episode, I'm sharing my own battle with major depressive disorder, and what I've learned about faith when everything feels heavy.

In this episode:

• Why "just choose joy" isn't helpful (and what actually is)
• What happened when I couldn't get out of bed for 3 days
• How God's response shattered everything I believed about my worth
• Why you can have faith AND depression at the same time
• Practical tools that kept me tethered to Jesus in the darkest seasons

The truth: Depression doesn't disqualify you from God's love. You're not failing at faith. You're human, and you're fighting a battle most people can't see.

🆘 Crisis Resources: If you're struggling with thoughts of suicide: Call or text 988 (Suicide & Crisis Lifeline)

💬 What's kept you connected to Jesus when it felt impossible? Share your story in the comments!

🎙️ Subscribe to the podcast so you don’t miss future episodes.

🎁 Sign up for my FREE mini-course on how to process your emotions God's way - without shutting down or spiraling.

📞 Book a FREE discovery call to explore 1:1 coaching with me!

📧 Join my weekly newsletter "Holy Unraveling" for Christian emotional healing encouragement in your inbox.

▶️ Follow me on Instagram @melchanity and Youtube @melissachancoaching for more encouragement and resources.

Send a text

Why does rest feel so wrong when God designed it for our good?

In this episode, I'm getting raw about my unhealthy relationship with rest and the breakdown that changed everything.

If you've ever felt guilty for taking a break or exhausted from performing even your faith, this one's for you.

In this episode, we talk about...

The lies we believe:

• "Rest is a luxury I can't afford"
• "If I rest, everything will fall apart"
• "I need to perform rest correctly"

The pivotal moments:

• Jasmine's shift from constant improvement to God's invitation to "dream, sit, and play"
• My fast food parking lot meltdown when God said "you've passed the test"
• Choosing resting over a Sunday service and finding God there

Why rest doesn't work when we do all the "right" activities:

• The heart shift vs. behavior change
• Sitting with uncomfortable emotions (guilt, shame, fear)
• How rest is where we actually get to know God

Plus practical reflection questions to uncover what's blocking your rest.

Key quotes:

"My worth has nothing to do with what I can produce. Rest does not take away from work."

"Rest and joy are tied together. You can't separate them."

"Fun is not childish, fun is childlike. God wants us to have childlike faith."

🎙️ Subscribe to the podcast so you don’t miss future episodes.

🎁 Sign up for my FREE mini-course on how to process your emotions God's way - without shutting down or spiraling.

📞 Book a FREE discovery call to explore 1:1 coaching with me!

📧 Join my weekly newsletter "Holy Unraveling" for Christian emotional healing encouragement in your inbox.

▶️ Follow me on Instagram @melchanity and Youtube @melissachancoaching for more encouragement and resources.

Send a text

If you’ve ever found yourself saying, “Why am I STILL struggling with this?” - this conversation is for you.

We open up about the heartbreak of feeling like we're back at square one in our healing process and the surprising ways God meets us there. We explore what real healing looks like when it’s messy, cyclical, and slower than we expected... and how the Holy Spirit gently leads us through the process with compassion, not condemnation.

During this episode, we unpack:

• The myth that healing should always be moving forward
• What to do when old coping tools stop working
• How to recognize growth even in the middle of triggers
• Why nervous system takes longer to heal than the mind
• How to reframe setbacks as God’s invitations to deeper freedom

This episode will help you breathe again, release the pressure to “get it right,” and recognize that you’re not failing. You're simply in the healing process.

🎙️ Subscribe to the podcast so you don’t miss future episodes.

🎁 Sign up for my FREE mini-course on how to process your emotions God's way - without shutting down or spiraling.

📞 Book a FREE discovery call to explore 1:1 coaching with me!

📧 Join my weekly newsletter "Holy Unraveling" for Christian emotional healing encouragement in your inbox.

▶️ Follow me on Instagram @melchanity and Youtube @melissachancoaching for more encouragement and resources.

Send a text

Have you ever felt afraid that if you stopped doing... stopped reading your Bible, stopped serving, stopped performing... that God might love you a little less?
You’re not alone.

In this raw and honest conversation, we unpack the deep-rooted lie that love must be earned... a lie many of us first learned in childhood, and one that still shapes how we relate to God today. Together, we explore how trauma, performance, and perfectionism condition our brains to equate doing with being loved and how the gospel, neuroscience, and the gentle heart of Jesus invite us into something different.

We talk about:

• Why unworthiness feels “true” in your body (and how to gently rewire it)
• How spiritual disciplines can become performance and how to return to intimacy
• The science of neuroplasticity and renewing your mind in Christ
• What it means to rest in love that doesn’t have to be earned

If you’ve ever wondered, “Does God still love me if I don’t do X, Y, or Z?” this episode will meet you in that question and remind you that love was never something you had to earn.

🎙️ Subscribe to the podcast so you don’t miss future episodes.

🎁 Sign up for my FREE mini-course on how to process your emotions God's way - without shutting down or spiraling.

📞 Book a FREE discovery call to explore 1:1 coaching with me!

📧 Join my weekly newsletter "Holy Unraveling" for Christian emotional healing encouragement in your inbox.

▶️ Follow me on Instagram @melchanity and Youtube @melissachancoaching for more encouragement and resources.

Send a text

What do you do when you love Jesus, show up for community, and still feel alone?In this episode, we talk about the loneliness no one wants to name - the ache of feeling unseen in a place that’s meant to feel like family.

We explore the paradox of being faithful yet still feeling forgotten, the ache of longing for connection that never quite lands, and the quiet grief of realizing that even in church, the very place meant for belonging, you can still feel alone.

Sometimes loneliness comes from unhealed places or misplaced hopes. Other times, it’s simply the ache of being human in a broken world... living in the “already but not yet” of God’s Kingdom where love is real but not yet whole.

Together, we’ll unpack:

• The difference between wounds that isolate you and the waiting that shapes you
• How to hold your heart open to people when it’s easier to shut down
• What it means to keep your faith alive when you still have unmet needs in community

If you’ve ever felt, “Why do I feel so alone here?”  this conversation is for you. You’re not faithless for feeling lonely. You’re simply human, longing for the home your heart was made for.

🎙️ Subscribe to the podcast so you don’t miss future episodes.

🎁 Sign up for my FREE mini-course on how to process your emotions God's way - without shutting down or spiraling.

📞 Book a FREE discovery call to explore 1:1 coaching with me!

📧 Join my weekly newsletter "Holy Unraveling" for Christian emotional healing encouragement in your inbox.

▶️ Follow me on Instagram @melchanity and Youtube @melissachancoaching for more encouragement and resources.

Send a text

Have you ever walked into church, smiled, said “I’m fine,” and instantly felt the ache of pretending?

In this episode, Melissa and Jasmine unpack the hidden pressure many believers feel to appear “spiritually mature.” We explore how church culture can unintentionally reward masking - showing up polished, composed, and holy - when our souls are actually crying out for safety and connection.

You’ll hear honest reflections about:

• The loneliness that comes from feeling unseen, even in church.
• Why we equate vulnerability with weakness.
• How pretending keeps us disconnected from both God and others.
• Practical, grace-filled ways to begin unmasking, little by little, without losing your sense of safety.
• What it looks like to let others in when your heart is still in a tender season of healing.

This isn’t about church-bashing. It’s about healing the parts of us that learned to hide and remembering that God meets us most deeply when we’re real.

Reflection Questions:

1. When was the last time you said "I'm fine" but didn’t mean it?
2. What keeps you from being honest with your community or even with yourself?
3. What would “one small act of honesty” look like for you this week?

🎙️ Subscribe to the podcast so you don’t miss future episodes.

🎁 Sign up for my FREE mini-course on how to process your emotions God's way - without shutting down or spiraling.

📞 Book a FREE discovery call to explore 1:1 coaching with me!

📧 Join my weekly newsletter "Holy Unraveling" for Christian emotional healing encouragement in your inbox.

▶️ Follow me on Instagram @melchanity and Youtube @melissachancoaching for more encouragement and resources.

Send a text

The Real Truth About People Pleasing

Most people think people pleasing is just about being “too nice” or not wanting to disappoint others, but the truth runs much deeper. For many of us, people pleasing is actually a trauma response - what we psychologists call fawning. It’s how we learned to survive unsafe environments, and it often shows up in ways we don’t even recognize.

In this episode, I share:

• The deeper reasons behind people pleasing that go beyond what you might expect
• The barriers and fears that keep us stuck in these patterns (and what you might feel when you start saying no)
• Tangible ways to begin overcoming people pleasing with God’s help, so you can walk in true freedom

If you’ve ever felt guilty for setting boundaries, terrified of rejection, or unsure who you are apart from meeting others’ needs, this conversation's for you.

🎙️ Subscribe to the podcast so you don’t miss future episodes.

🎁 Sign up for my FREE mini-course on how to process your emotions God's way - without shutting down or spiraling.

📞 Book a FREE discovery call to explore 1:1 coaching with me!

📧 Join my weekly newsletter "Holy Unraveling" for Christian emotional healing encouragement in your inbox.

▶️ Follow me on Instagram @melchanity and Youtube @melissachancoaching for more encouragement and resources.