This week, the guys take a deep dive into the world of Uncrustables. Sean kicks things off by celebrating the Bills big win, while Greg shares a hilarious tale about his misadventures with a hybrid car. The trio dive into some big questions: Are Uncrustables throwing shade at Jif, and what’s the secret behind their runaway success? Sean pitches patenting his shirts, but does he have the "flash of genius" it takes? The verdict comes in quick. Plus, a new word of the week shakes things up. Uncrustables take center stage in the NFL, but can they legally own a whole sandwich? And in a shocking twist, the St. Louis Arch weighs in on the show.

This week, the guys take a deep dive into the history of elevators—but not before debating their "lower limit" for rating random restaurants. Greg sounds the horn (literally), and they tease the possibility of new merch with a special design inspired by Sean’s math. A heated discussion ensues: could Skippy ever sponsor the show? Greg isn’t exactly on board.

They also tackle some big questions: Why are some elevators so painfully slow? And what are the risks (and myths) about elevator safety? Along the way, they reminisce about a chaotic go-karting experience and question whether it’s worth trying again. Finally, the team contemplates whether their signature sign-off—“You have the right to charge your phone, and you have been consumed”—still fits.

Sean and Josh take a trip down memory lane, sharing stories of opening for bands, while Tim reflects on how Ludo perfectly timed their hits for radio. Sean might have discovered the ultimate on-stage water, and Josh teaches the crew how to scale a fish before recounting a lonely late-night encounter at a McDonald’s drive-thru. Tim revisits a memorable road trip with Greg, where they stumbled upon the eerie remains of a Ruby Tuesday. Meanwhile, the guys debate whether Tim is secretly rocking Lululemon... Sean also shares memories of his first gig at The Funny Bone, and the group unanimously agrees: Groundhog Day is a cinematic masterpiece.

Get ready for a deep dive into the tangy and unexpected history of Heinz! Sean kicks things off with a hilarious tale about his comedy set at his aunt’s retirement party, while the guys uncover surprising ketchup trivia—like its tomato-less beginnings and the mystery behind Heinz’s '57.' They also tackle the bizarre question: what was coal tar doing in early ketchup recipes? Meanwhile, Tim and Greg test Sean’s eyesight, and he might need some glasses. The crew weighs in on the pros and cons of Pittsburgh (spoiler: it’s a great city), responds to listener comments, and, of course, reminds everyone to smash that like button!

Energizer! Mookapotamus shows his face! Tim is ripping off fans. We all agree our

Energizer is a great brand, but they were once guilty of acting like babies. Tim reports on a battery mystery. There’s some talk of firing Randy and Sean steps up.

Gatorade! We have Christmas lights. Tim gets wacky at the first Consumers photo

shoot and Sean and Greg are reluctant to play along. We remember the first

Consumers studio and the practice episodes. Sean has a legend of a dumb moment.

We talk about Logan Paul’s sports drink and it gets goofy. We finally all agree on

something, and it is gum. Fun facts take a strange turn but, baby, is it worth it.

Greg and Sean reflect on their time in Seattle, sharing memories of an in-flight emergency. Sean crushed it with his t-shirt sales but hilariously struggles with locating hotel fridges. We dive into the history of Fritos, even pondering if Mahatma Gandhi would have been a fan. The word "mercurial" makes an epic return. A debate arises about the ultimate snack: KitKats with Jif or walking tacos. Plus, the guys revisit some classic characters in a showdown between "Venezuelan Tim" and "Deadpan Sean."

Greg and Sean spent 12 hours in a car together. Something had to give, and it did.

Filmmaker Michael Moore makes a surprise appearance on the pod. We think

something is a little fishy with Monaghan’s first date. Sean had a crush on lady that he

used to delivered pizzas to, and he gives out her address. We finally learn the origin of

Sean’s two-dollar bill habit. More “Walk to Remember” talk.

It’s the Honey Baked Ham episode. We promise, we will eventually get there. We’ve

got decorations from Kate Convy? Greg stutters through an apology to Williams

Sonoma. A lot of “you’re a bad driver” accusations flying around the studio. We receive

inside information on the Honey Baked Ham holiday rush from an officer of the law.

Momentous occasion. We link Honey Baked Hams to Flashdance, the movie. Sean’s

sneaks in a word of the day. The Consumers have received their first swag. We

announce the big Sean O’Brien Lego Space Shuttle winner. Finally, the much awaited

explanation of the logo.

We kick off this week with a special guest, Dustin Nickerson. One host is running late to the show, and you’ll never guess who it is. Greg argues that Dan Gable is one of the greatest wrestlers of all time, while Dustin questions how hard wrestling really is. Tim and Greg reminisce about spotting the most attractive archaeologist. The guys delve into the history of Pringles, as Tim reflects on the complexities of Battlefield Earth. Sean sparks a Pickleball debate, and Greg experiments with some new accents. Meanwhile, the Pringles facts keep the guys cracking up.