The Dad I Want To Be with Mike Forrester

Perfectionism is an excuse that many of us use for not completing a task or project. We will say it's not good enough, so we continue to work on it, or move onto another project instead of completing the one we've already begun. Perfectionism will cause us to procrastinate, waste time working on the same task, delays improvement and creates senseless anxiety and stress.

Mistakes are normal, to be expected and help the improvement process. We can use a deadline to limit our time wasted and never finish a task. Comparison is a component of perfectionism that keeps us bound from progress. Honestly, who do you know who is perfect? Persuing great quality is fantastic, but hiding behind the excuse of perfectionism isn't beneficial to you or others. Ask for help or input, it can aid in moving things forward as well.

The root question to ask is, am I hiding behind perfectionism for fear of something? Are you afraid of others' reactions? Are you fearful that it might be a failure, and then categorize you as a failure too? What is really going on behind the scenes? Delve into it with honesty, yet also give yourself grace and compassion. Start taking action, completing what you begin and living your best life!

Connect with Mike Forrester

https://linktr.ee/hicoachmike

Rennie Gabriel shares his insights on how you can create wealth at any age. As a financial planner at the age of 50, he found himself flat broke after a second divorce and a business failure. From this place, many would have resigned themselves to this lot in life. But, instead, Rennie focused on learning how the wealthy had created theirs and set about doing the same. He’s now created that legacy and is helping others obtain it for themselves.

To create our own wealth, we need to know where we currently are financially. Then to change your financial habits so you’re investing for yourself first. Rennie didn’t stop with achieving his financial goals; he also was determined to donate to charity. One, in particular, Shelter to Soldier, helps veterans through rescue dogs. Join me as Rennie shares his journey, mistakes and successes, and insights for you and me in creating our own wealth.

Connect with Rennie Gabriel

Website:

https://wealthonanyincome.com/tedx/

Facebook:

https://www.facebook.com/WealthOnAnyIncome/

Instagram:

https://www.instagram.com/wealthonanyincome/

Connect with Mike Forrester

https://linktr.ee/hicoachmike

In reviewing some of the highlights from the interview with Dr. Anthony Balduzzi. Let's ponder his insights and then move forward to action.

• Pain vs. suffering.
• How to avoid suffering.
• Transformation begins with acceptance & surrender.
• Improving your health can be a springboard for change.

Connect with Mike Forrester

https://linktr.ee/hicoachmike

A priorities list helps an overwhelmed man decide what to do now, what to schedule, what to hand off, and what can wait. In this solo episode, Mike Forrester starts with a problem most men know well. There is always more to do than there is time. Tasks keep circling in your head, like the oil change you think about ten times a day. Then your wife asks if you did the thing, and you realize you forgot. Mike shares that he lived this way for a long time. He let everything float around in his head until he was overwhelmed and stuck in analysis paralysis. He was trying to do everything and getting nothing done. That frustrated him, and it frustrated his wife, because she could see it building in him.

The core tool is a four-square matrix built on two questions: is it urgent, and is it important? The first step comes before the matrix. Get every task out of your head and onto paper, so your mind has room to rest. Then sort each one into a box. Urgent and important tasks get done now, and that box should stay small. Important tasks that aren't urgent get scheduled, like the dentist or cleaning the gutters. Urgent tasks that don't need you get delegated. Think of taking the car in for an oil change or getting help with the yard. Tasks that are neither get postponed, or dropped once you see they don't need doing at all. Inside each box, Mike picks the single most important task. When the kids need dinner and clean clothes for school, dinner comes first.

The part of this episode that matters most at home is a mistake Mike admits he made. He used to build his list based only on what mattered to him. He never asked his wife what she needed from him or how much it mattered to her. Something she rates an eight might feel like a three to him. Mike's example is cleaning the garage while she's asking for help with Thanksgiving dinner. He's clear that you don't have to run your whole list past your wife or your boss. You only need to ask when a task affects them. This one is for the dad juggling a job, kids at the dinner table, and a wife who keeps waiting on him. It gives him a clear head and a way to put his energy where his family needs it.

What You'll Learn In This Episode:

• Get every task out of your head and onto paper so you stop carrying it around all day.
• Use the urgent and important matrix to decide what to do now, schedule, delegate, or postpone.
• Recognize that a task on your list doesn't have to be done by you, and it doesn't have to be done now.
• Spot the work tasks you can hand off so your energy goes to what only you can do.
• Pick the single most important task in each box, like getting the kids fed before the laundry.
• Ask your wife what she needs from you and how much it matters to her before you set your priorities.

The key moments in this episode are:

00:01:04 - why not everything on your list has to be done by you or done now

00:01:58 - how to get your to-do list out of your head and stop feeling overwhelmed

00:03:17 - how to use the urgent and important matrix to prioritize tasks

00:03:39 - what to schedule when a task is important but not urgent

00:04:45 - what to delegate when a task is urgent but not important

00:06:03 - what to postpone or drop from your list

00:06:33 - how to pick the most important task in each category

00:07:30 - why you should ask your wife what's a priority for her

00:09:54 - how to get out of analysis paralysis

Connect with Mike Forrester

https://linktr.ee/hicoachmike

You’re going to encounter struggles; it’s a when not if factor. But, to remain consistent and persist, you need to know your why to carry you through tough times. This week, Dr. Anthony Balduzzi, founder of the Fit Father Project and Fit Mother Project programs, joins me. He shares how the loss of his father at a younger age was the catalyst for his passion in life. His programs focus on helping moms and dads in their 40s, 50s, 60s and above to reclaim their health.

At 9 years old, Anthony’s father passed away, he stepped into his dad’s shoes to become the man of the house. This wasn’t the only transformational phase of Anthony’s life. He broke his arm and leg in a skiing accident, which allowed him to look inward and discover compassion and embrace others from a heartfelt perspective. He shares the difference between pain and suffering, how you and I can live life in this present moment to avoid suffering.

Connect with Dr. Anthony Balduzzi

Website:

https://www.fitfatherproject.com/

https://www.fitmotherproject.com/

Facebook:

https://www.facebook.com/fitfatherproject

Instagram:

https://www.instagram.com/fitfatherproject/

YouTube:

http://bit.ly/2oy5N3W

Connect with Mike Forrester

https://linktr.ee/hicoachmike

My friend Jay Twining sat down with me this week to talk about how he's leaving behind generational differences through intentional living. He assessed his parents' life and behaviors to determine what he did and didn't want to continue in his own life, something we can overlook and inadvertently subject and pass along to our children. You'll hear how the possibilities people shared impacted and shaped his thinking. Yet, he wasn't solely reliant upon them, taking action to direct his path. For example, deciding if he wanted to remain within the video game industry or struggling to find his new career was viable and worth the desire to be present as a husband and dad.

Jay encourages you and me to dream unreasonably, extend courage for ourselves in seeing who we want to become, take the adventurous route, and play it big. That life is like a horse, running by us and we have the opportunity to grab the reins and direct it where we want. Hear how Jay has taken responsibility in his life for himself and for his family to be intentional, living a fully aligned life that exudes integrity and joy.

Connect with Jay Twining

Facebook:

https://www.facebook.com/jay.twining/

Instagram:

https://www.instagram.com/jaytwining/

Connect with Mike Forrester

https://linktr.ee/hicoachmike

A man who spends his life seeking approval learns to play small, and his kids are often the first to feel what that costs. My guest Josh Cary calls himself the hidden entrepreneur. For more than 40 years he hid his talent and ability to win the approval of others. Deep down he believed he didn't fit in, nobody wanted him around, and he wasn't good enough. Rather than risk conflict, he proved people's low expectations right. He spent 15 years in acting and film chasing applause that never filled the void. By the time he had a young daughter and son, he describes himself as angry, miserable, and depressed. One day, playing Candyland, he won the last spin and broke down crying with his head in his hands. His daughter looked up and asked, "Daddy, why are you crying? You won." That question became his turning point. Soon after, he left a toxic partnership in the digital marketing agency he'd run for 10 years.

The changes started small. Josh looked at the habit he used every night to bury his fear and cut it first. He studied how people living the life he wanted spent their mornings, and he copied them. Today he wakes up before anyone else in his house and takes 30 to 60 minutes for himself. He credits that idea to Hal Elrod's The Miracle Morning. He skips the snooze button, rides his Peloton three to four days a week, and watches little television before bed. A checkup showing very high cholesterol pushed him to cut nearly all sugar. He also names a five-step process he calls "F that noise" for quieting the self-talk that drowns out what we're capable of. His view of fear changed too. He treats fear as a signpost that he's heading the right way, and then he acts through it. He calls it stacking habits, one day at a time, into a life he's proud of.

The heart of Josh's story is what happened once he stopped waiting to be discovered. He launched the Hidden Entrepreneur Show with no idea what came next. He quietly chose a coach and mentor as his Mickey, the person he'd call if old critics came after him. Nobody ever did. Recording at an event, he met a fellow New Jersey podcaster who invited him to his studio, and they co-founded PodMAX. Josh says that door opened because he was already showing up as powerfully as he could. All his life he'd hoped someone would see his potential first. He learned he had to see it himself. Mike Forrester lives and teaches that a man should quit trying to fix himself by himself. Josh's mentor gave him the backing to finally play big. If your kids have seen you angry and checked out, Josh shows what changes when you make them your reason.

What You'll Learn In This Episode:

• Recognize how seeking approval and avoiding conflict can keep a man hiding what he's capable of.
• See how one honest moment with your kids can become the reason you finally change.
• Use small stacked habits, like waking before your family and skipping the snooze button, to start your day on your terms.
• Learn how a health scare like high cholesterol can push you to care for your body so you're around for your kids.
• Understand why treating fear as a signpost helps you take bold action at work instead of playing small.
• Spot why one mentor in your corner makes it easier to leave what isn't working and step into something better.

The key moments in this episode are:

00:03:17 - what it looks like to hide your talent to win approval

00:05:00 - how your kids can show you that you still have growing up to do

00:07:15 - the Candyland moment that made an angry, depressed dad decide to change

00:08:32 - how to walk away from a toxic business relationship

00:12:31 - what to do when you fear people will pull you back down

00:15:59 - why chasing applause never fills the void

00:18:19 - how a high cholesterol scare can change the way you eat

00:20:20 - why owning every choice gives you your power back

00:21:10 - how to build confidence when you're used to playing small

00:22:23 - why feeling fear means you're on the right track

00:25:15 - how showing up powerfully attracts the right opportunities

00:29:24 - morning habits that help a busy dad perform at his best

Connect with Josh Cary

Website:

https://joshcary.com/

Facebook:

https://www.facebook.com/josh.cary.39/

Instagram:

https://www.instagram.com/joshcaryco/

Connect with Mike Forrester

https://linktr.ee/hicoachmike

I'm joined this week by Chris Voss, author of 'Beacons of Leadership', Forbes Top 50 recognized, CEO/Host of The Chris Voss Show, consultant, speaker, Youtuber and coach. We talk about gratitude, discovering your purpose, reviewing your life experiences to determine your toolkit. The role and strength we as men can serve for one another through accountability and community.

As a serial entrepreneur, Chris built a portfolio of businesses over many years to watch them fade as the 2008 recession hit. But, he continued to fight and persevere, using his creativity and out-of-the-box thinking to discover his recovery and success. When the pandemic began, he used his 2008 experiences to share lessons learned and inspire others. In lifting others through his experiences, he was then encouraged by the community to write 'Beacons of Leadership' and they formed an accountability group to write their books too.

Connect with Chris Voss

Website:

https://TheChrisVossShow.com/

'Beacons of Leadership' book

https://BeaconsOfLeadership.com/

Facebook:

https://www.facebook.com/chrisvoss/

Instagram:

https://www.instagram.com/chrisvoss/

Connect with Mike Forrester

https://linktr.ee/hicoachmike

Join me this week as we have a real and raw conversation with Justin Brien. He is a mental health advocate, speaker and professional executive coach. I had the honor of chatting with Justin about his journey and how he's traversing life today. As you'll hear, he's taken time away from the business to spend time with his family as his newly born daughter is recovering in NICU from surgery. Justin extends you and me a lot of trust in taking us in the decisions he's making for his own health and his family's. We discuss how self-reflection is the key to improving mental health.

We also delve into Justin's story to discuss how alcohol can create false confidence, fight addiction and address depression. We'll be dealing with loss, being aware of your personal mental health and how to make appropriate decisions if correction is needed. Justin has a fantastic transformational story - I came away encouraged by his honesty and vulnerability, as well as hopeful for what is yet to come.

Connect with Justin Brien

Website:

https://justinbrien.com/

Facebook:

https://www.facebook.com/justin.h.brien/

Instagram:

https://www.instagram.com/justinbrien19/

Connect with Mike Forrester

https://linktr.ee/hicoachmike

Andy Storch is a man who’s passionate about helping others take control of their life and career. He is a husband, father, speaker, author, consultant, coach and podcast host of now three shows. In the later part of 2020, Andy began experiencing abdominal pain. Then, just as he was launching his book, he was diagnosed with testicular cancer. To compound the matter, he was then advised it had also spread to his stomach and neck.

The pain wasn’t subsiding as Andy worked on tackling cancer through natural means. He and his wife decided to pursue addressing the treatment through chemo. Andy finished up in April of this year, is now cancer-free and nearly fully recovered. How Andy chose to face this diagnosis sets him apart from others I’ve known who’ve undergone a similar journey. His focus was on maintaining a high mental capacity, seeing things in life as a blessing instead of becoming a victim and seeing what opportunities were now available that weren’t before. While you and I may not be facing cancer, we will be confronted with challenges. We can take lessons from Andy’s journey and apply them to our own – whether it’s our personal or career, this impacts all areas of our life.

Connect with Andy Storch

Website:

https://andystorch.com/

Own Your Career Own Your Life book bonuses:

https://ownyourcareerownyourlife.com/bonus

Facebook:

https://www.facebook.com/andystorch/

Instagram:

https://www.instagram.com/andy_storch/

Connect with Mike Forrester

https://linktr.ee/hicoachmike