The Date with Confidence Podcast

This is hands down my favourite episode I’ve ever recorded.

I have the most special guest on The Date with Confidence Podcast: my grandad. 

In this episode, we delve into the charming story of how my grandparents met and why grandad believes their 57 year marriage has been so successful. Plus, he reveals to me what he really thought of my ex boyfriends and gives me dating advice I never expected. 

Here's a peek at what we discussed:

1. Love At First Sight: Grandad shares the story of how he met my nan at work, highlighting a moment of love at first sight and the charming details of their courtship

2. Reflections on Longevity: Grandad reflects on his 57-year-long marriage, emphasising the significance of love, tolerance, and a willingness to give and take in making a relationship last.

3. Dating Criteria and Priorities: Grandad emphasises the importance of finding a partner who prioritises and cares for you and shares how he’s always put nan first.

4. Telling the Truth: I ask Grandad what he really thought about my ex boyfriend and he doesn’t hold back!

5. Traditional Dating vs. Modern Apps: Drawing a comparison between past and present, Grandad expresses scepticism about dating apps. He encourages face-to-face interactions, suggesting that personal connections are more genuine than online profiles.

6. Paying for Dates: Grandad gives his opinion on who should be paying the bill on the first date and how suggesting to split it could cause embarrassment on their part.

7. Relationship Progression: Reflecting on his own relationship with my nan, Grandad talks about the natural progression of their relationships and how they became a couple - did he ask her to become his girlfriend?

8. Final Words of Wisdom: The episode concludes with a reflection on a long and happy life, acknowledging the challenges of ageing but emphasising the fulfilment derived from family and meaningful connections. 

This episode offers listeners a heartwarming glimpse into the enduring love story of my grandparents, coupled with timeless dating advice from a man with a wealth of life experience. It's not just an interview; it's a family legacy shared with you.

Links to episodes mentioned:

The Near Perfect Date That Became a Hilarious Nightmare

Get Involved!

You can contribute your stories to the Date with Confidence Podcast here. Share your best or worst dating stories, your biggest icks, dating tips you think everyone should know or ask me anything about my dating life or a burning question you need an answer for.  

Resources

• The Confidence Kit
• The Confidence Course

Visit The Date with Confidence website here.

Follow The Date with Confidence Podcast on Instagram + follow your host Rebecca Hawkes here.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

EPISODE 22: He Wanted Me to Send Photos and Lied About His Age

Guess who's got a new dating story for you....

In this episode of The Date with Confidence Podcast, I've got a brand new first date story about Rob*. Find out why my friends insisted I sack him off immediately and how I responded when he continued to ask me to send photos of myself. Plus, the shock reason he lied about his age and didn't tell me until we met.

Here's a peek at what we cover:

1. Matching & Initial Impressions: Where we matched the first time, where we matched the second time, why I labelled him as a fuck boy immediately and the reason I was totally ok with this.

2. Red Flags & Misgivings: Requesting photos wasn't the only red flag Rob raised but still, I went on a date with him.

3. Age Deception & Uncomfortable Moments: He arrives to the date 15 minutes late and confesses to lying about his age on dating apps. Initially this didn't bother me, until he revealed the reason for the deception....

4. Banter & Awkward Interactions: I'm sharing the instances of 'banter' that made me uncomfortable and why, at 33 years old, I'm no longer available for this.

5. Dinner & Unwanted Advances: The date progresses to dinner and then we have another drink in the pub before Rob's unwanted physical advances make me feel uncomfortable.

6. Post-Date Communication: Rob's post-date messages further reveal his persistence in seeking photos despite my clear boundaries.

7. Friend's Opinions & Not Replying: Every friend I've spoken to about Rob has told me to sack him off immediately and did I end up ghosting him?

Links to episodes mentioned:

Hitting the Reset Button in July (the story of losing Jasper 💔)

The Near Perfect Date That Became a Hilarious Nightmare

Date Yourself: How to Feel Confident Taking Yourself Out

I Know What I Deserve Now and This Is NOT It

Get Involved!

You can contribute your stories to the Date with Confidence Podcast here. Share your best or worst dating stories, your biggest icks, dating tips you think everyone should know or ask me anything about my dating life or a burning question you need an answer for.  

Resources

• The Confidence Kit
• The Confidence Course

Get weekly-ish updates and access behind the scenes gossip when you become a podcast insider.

Visit The Date with Confidence website here.

Follow The Date with Confidence Podcast on Instagram

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

I decided to give Bumble Speed Dating a shot, not just once, but twice. I’d heard good things about it from a few people so thought I’d have a go myself. What’s the harm, eh?

In this episode of The Date with Confidence Podcast, I’m sharing what happened during my experience and why I swiftly backed out the first time. 

Here are the key topics covered:

1. Discovering Bumble Speed Dating: I've always wanted to try speed dating in real life, but finding a friend to join me proved trickier than I thought so when a friend introduced me to Bumble Speed Dating, I signed up on a Sunday night, looking to bounce back into the dating scene after a recent rejection.

2. Expectations vs. Reality: I’m revealing all about my intentions for the speed dating; my initial expectations were high, why I was hoping for a confidence boost and how I was using it as a reminder of the abundance of potential matches. Unfortunately, the reality turned out quite different.

3. Handling Rejection: The rejection factor hit hard, especially during a vulnerable period. I share insights on handling rejection and the importance of not internalising it.

4. The Setup of Bumble Speed Dating: I’m filling you in on how Bumble Speed Dating works so if you wanna give it a try yourself, you know what to expect.

5. The Power of Mindset: The second time around was different. I entered with a better mindset, I engaged in more meaningful conversations and learned the importance of being true to my dating preferences.

6. Real-Life vs. Virtual Dating: While Bumble Speed Dating didn't quite hit the mark for me, I still hold out hope for trying the real-life version, where chemistry is more tangible.

Join me in this episode as I navigate the highs and lows of virtual speed dating, sharing insights and lessons along the way. It's a journey worth taking, but maybe not for everyone. Remember, the dating world is full of surprises – good and bad.

Episodes Mentioned:

• Am I Actually Delusional?! The Rollercoaster of Modern Dating
• How to Deal with Rejection When You’re Dating

Get Involved!

You can contribute your stories to the Date with Confidence Podcast here. Share your best or worst dating stories, your biggest icks, dating tips you think everyone should know or ask me anything about my dating life or a burning question you need an answer for.  

Resources

• The Confidence Kit
• The Confidence Course

Visit The Date with Confidence website here.

Follow The Date with Confidence Podcast on Instagram + follow your host Rebecca Hawkes here.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

A few weeks ago, I went for dinner with two of my besties and as we enjoyed our food, I revealed all about a new guy on the scene who would be taking me on a date 4 days later.

They suggested I record a pre-date episode that I could reflect back on after this initial date.

And that’s exactly what this episode was *supposed* to be.

But something happened……

In this episode of The Date with Confidence Podcast, we’re having a candid and empowering chat about setting boundaries and knowing your worth when it comes to dating. It’s not the episode I had planned but it’s packed full of powerful reminders we all need from time to time.

Here are the key topics covered:

1. The Anticipated Date: Initially, the plan was to delve into the pre-date excitement, expectations, and the lead-up to a potentially exciting rendezvous with a brand new match.

2. The Unexpected: The message I had a feeling was coming but didn’t want to receive and why I was so outraged by it.

3. Boundaries and Self-Worth: I’m sharing how proud I am of my own personal growth when it comes to setting strong boundaries and recognising my own value. Gone are the days where I’ll settle for second best.

4. Empowerment through Experience: Each disappointing encounter reinforces my commitment to high standards and self-worth. I want to encourage you to adopt a similar mindset to the one I share, recognising when a situation doesn't align with your value.

Remember, you're not alone in navigating the dating world, and setting boundaries is a powerful act of self-love. Until next time, stay empowered and confident.

For the full story that will never be shared publicly, join The Date with Confidence Podcast Substack here.

Get Involved!

You can contribute your stories to the Date with Confidence Podcast here. Share your best or worst dating stories, your biggest icks, dating tips you think everyone should know or ask me anything about my dating life or a burning question you need an answer for.  

Resources

• The Breakup Bounce Back
• Attract on the Apps
• The Confidence Kit
• The Confidence Course

Get weekly-ish updates, exclusive offers and access behind the scenes gossip when you become a podcast insider.

Visit The Date with Confidence website here.

Follow The Date with Confidence Podcast on Instagram + follow your host Rebecca Hawkes here.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Whether it's a first date, second, third, fourth date that fills you with anxiety…

Or whether the idea of connecting with people on apps makes you feel sick…

Or whether it's putting yourself out there for the first time if you've been single for a long time…

Or you just want to enter a room feeling full of confidence instead of fear…

The concept I’m sharing with you in this episode of The Date with Confidence Podcast is going to help you feel confident in every aspect of dating (and other areas of your life!). 

Here are the key topics covered:

1. Introduction to The 90/90 Mindset Concept: Discover the concept I created that encompasses the lessons, tools and techniques that have helped me to create unwavering self confidence over the past 12+ years.

2. Understanding The 90/90 Mindset: Understand the first core principle of the concept that’ll have you waving buh-bye to unrealistic mindset goals and saying hello to an empowering mindset that’ll support you in your dating life.

3. You Only Need 90 Seconds: Learn how just 90 seconds of confidence can help you transform the trajectory of your life and open you up to an abundance of possibilities.

4. Three Layers of Confidence: We take a deep dive into the three layers of confidence you need to focus your attention on to feel confident on every date, help you set solid boundaries and raise your relationship standards. 

5. Think Confident: Uncover the mindset that can negatively impact your dating experience and understand how to change your thought patterns to help you enjoy dating.

6. Act Confident: Confidence comes from taking action and to help you take confident action, learn the instant confidence boosters that’ll shift your energy in seconds. 

7. Feel Confident: Understand how to consciously create the feeling of confidence so you can conjure it up into your body whenever you need it. 

Remember, dating confidently isn't about perfection; it's about progress. Dive into these practices, transform your mindset, and watch how confidence becomes your natural state.

Episodes Mentioned:

• Important Things I Tell Myself Before a First Date
• How to Act & Feel Confident Before a First Date
• Mindset Shifts You Need to Make Around Dating

Get Involved!

You can contribute your stories to the Date with Confidence Podcast here. Share your best or worst dating stories, your biggest icks, dating tips you think everyone should know or ask me anything about my dating life or a burning question you need an answer for.  

Resources

• The Confidence Kit
• The Confidence Course

Visit The Date with Confidence website here.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

You’ve been on a lovely date with a lovely guy and had a lovely time.

But however lovely it was, he’s just not doing it for you. The problem is, you’ve committed to another date.

How can you cancel a date with the nice one, without coming across as a complete arsehole?

In this episode of The Date with Confidence Podcast, I’m sharing the exact message I send to the lovely men who just aren’t for me. Learn the one thing you need to remember when rejecting someone and steal my script for the next time you need to cancel on someone.

Here are the key topics covered:

1. Great First Date: Hear about the lovely first date I had with a genuinely nice guy at the start of the year.

2. Change of Heart: Learn why I had to cancel the second date we had planned and how ultimately, this lead to me deciding not to see him again.

3. Feeling the Guilt: I share why I’ve always felt guilty about cancelling plans in the past and how him paying for the date made me feel like I owed him a second one (even though he wasn’t that type of guy). 

4. The Honesty Approach: Discover the honest and respectful approach I take when it comes to cancelling dates or rejecting someone I’m just not into.

5. Respectful Closure: It's crucial to remember that you don't owe anyone anything. Understand that it's okay to change your mind.

6. Positive Responses: I’m revealing how the men I’ve sent this message to have responded when I’ve politely and respectfully said I’m just not into them.

Ultimately, we all date with the goal of finding a genuine connection, and sometimes it just doesn't happen. It's better to be honest early on than to force something that isn't there. So, if you ever find yourself needing to cancel a date with the "nice one," use an upfront and respectful approach – it works! Feel free to use my script if it helps.

You’ll find the full script on the episode page here.

Get Involved!

You can contribute your stories to the Date with Confidence Podcast here. Share your best or worst dating stories, your biggest icks, dating tips you think everyone should know or ask me anything about my dating life or a burning question you need an answer for.  

Resources

• The Breakup Bounce Back
• Attract on the Apps
• The Confidence Kit
• The Confidence Course

Get weekly-ish updates, exclusive offers and access behind the scenes gossip when you become a podcast insider.

Visit The Date with Confidence website here.

Follow The Date with Confidence Podcast on Instagram + follow your host Rebecca Hawkes here.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Have you ever been told you “look saucy as a bowl of spaghetti”?

Or been asked to dress up like a bridesmaid for a first date?

Are you ever left confused about whether someone’s trying to make a joke or genuinely means the wild shit that’s coming out of their fingertips?

Surely I can’t be the only one who receives weird af comments on their dating profile, can I?

In this lighthearted episode of The Date with Confidence Podcast, I thought we'd do something a bit different. I’m taking you behind the scenes of my Hinge profile and sharing some of the weirdest comments I've received on my photos. 

Here are the key topics covered:

1. Saucy as Spaghetti: From bizarre compliments to a comparison with a bowl of spaghetti, some comments are just plain weird.

2. Dress Up for Me: One comment suggested we go on a date with me dressed as a bridesmaid. A bit presumptuous, right?

3. Intense Dating Proposals: Some people get a bit too intense, like planning spin classes at 5 a.m. for a first date or suggesting we honeymoon in the Maldives before we've even matched.

4. The Art of Banter: There's a fine line between playful banter and taking things too far. Mocking each other can be fun, but some of the comments I received were not what I’d call ‘banter’....

5. Unique or Weird?: When someone calls you "unique," is it a compliment or a polite way of saying "weird"?

6. "I'm Too Deep": One guy claimed to be "too deep" for his own good - was this a euphemism…?

I'd love to hear your bizarre dating app encounters too, so feel free to share your screenshots or stories. Remember, these comments are all in good fun and not to shame anyone so if you’ve got a comment to share, please remove the person’s image/name.

Get Involved!

You can contribute your stories to the Date with Confidence Podcast here. Share your best or worst dating stories, your biggest icks, dating tips you think everyone should know or ask me anything about my dating life or a burning question you need an answer for.  

Resources

• The Breakup Bounce Back
• Attract on the Apps
• The Confidence Kit
• The Confidence Course

Get weekly-ish updates, exclusive offers and access behind the scenes gossip when you become a podcast insider.

Visit The Date with Confidence website here.

Follow The Date with Confidence Podcast on Instagram + follow your host Rebecca Hawkes here.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Should you have sex on the third date?

Should the guy pay for everything on a first date?

Should you really be waiting for hours before responding to a message from them?

And, is it an absolute no no to talk about your exes on a first date?

In this episode of The Date with Confidence Podcast, we're diving into the world of dating rules and why it's time to ditch them for good. 

Here are the key topics covered:

1. The Pressure to Have Sex on a Third Date: Remember the old dating rule about having sex on the third date? Well, I say it's time to ditch that expectation. It's okay to take your time and build an emotional connection before anything physical.

2. Who Pays on a First Date:  While it's great when your date picks up the check, let's not make it an expectation. I appreciate it for sure, but I'm down for equality and sometimes prefer to split the bill. It's about finding a balance that works for both parties.

3. Stop the Texting Mind Games: Why wait for hours to respond to a message? Let's be real, playing these games doesn't lead to healthy relationships.

4. Talking About Exes on a First Date: Contrary to the old advice, I find it healthy to discuss past relationships on a date. It helps you understand your potential partner's expectations and deal-breakers, making it easier to decide if you're compatible.

5. Authenticity is Key: Don't try to be your best self, try to be your true self. Being authentic on your dates is crucial. It allows both you and your date to form a genuine connection and know if you're compatible from the start.

So, let's ditch those outdated dating rules and embrace a more authentic and open approach to dating. Remember, it's about finding the right connection, not following a set of rigid rules. 

Get Involved!

You can contribute your stories to the Date with Confidence Podcast here. Share your best or worst dating stories, your biggest icks, dating tips you think everyone should know or ask me anything about my dating life or a burning question you need an answer for.  

Resources

• The Breakup Bounce Back
• Attract on the Apps
• The Confidence Kit
• The Confidence Course

Get weekly-ish updates, exclusive offers and access behind the scenes gossip when you become a podcast insider.

Visit The Date with Confidence website here.

Follow The Date with Confidence Podcast on Instagram + follow your host Rebecca Hawkes here.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

 Let's talk about rejection.

Rejection happens to all of us, no matter what stage of life we're in, no matter what stage of dating we're in, no matter how old we are, how young we are: we're going to get rejected at some point. Fact.

Just as we’re going to reject someone at some point.

Whilst rejection is a totally normal part of life, it doesn’t mean it doesn’t suck. It’s painful, it makes us question ourselves and can reopen our not enoughness wounds.

In this episode of The Date with Confidence Podcast, I’m sharing how I deal with rejection when it comes to dating plus I’ll reveal the exact 7 day plan I followed after a recent rejection. 

Here are the key topics covered:

1. Rejection Happens to Everyone: There’s no shame in being rejected (despite what this recent comment said on my Instagram….)

2. Responding to Rejection in Your 20s vs. 30s: We discuss how my response to rejection has evolved from my 20s to 30s. 

3. The Impact of Toxic Behaviours: I get open and honest about the toxic behaviours I exhibited in my younger years in response to rejection. 

4. Coping Strategies for Rejection: I’m sharing my updated coping strategies for rejection, including seeking support from a coach, focusing on self-love, and why I choose to jump straight back into dating.

5. The 90/90 Mindset Concept: I’m revealing my secret to being able to handle rejection without losing self confidence. When you understand these 3 things, rejection will stop having such a massive impact on you.

6. An Action Plan for Dealing with Rejection: I’m breaking down exactly what I did in the 7 days that followed a recent rejection and how each of these steps helped me to deal with rejection.

This episode is a valuable resource for anyone dealing with rejection in the dating world, offering insights and actionable steps to boost self confidence and maintain a positive mindset.

Get Involved!

You can contribute your stories to the Date with Confidence Podcast here. Share your best or worst dating stories, your biggest icks, dating tips you think everyone should know or ask me anything about my dating life or a burning question you need an answer for.  

Resources

• The Breakup Bounce Back
• Attract on the Apps
• The Confidence Kit
• The Confidence Course

Get weekly-ish updates, exclusive offers and access behind the scenes gossip when you become a podcast insider.

Visit The Date with Confidence website here.

Follow The Date with Confidence Podcast on Instagram + follow your host Rebecca Hawkes here.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

When something ends quicker than you expected, how do you handle it?

What actions do you take to prevent these patterns repeating themselves?

How do you release the trauma so it doesn’t impact you in the future?

In this episode of The Date with Confidence Podcast - a follow up to the "Am I Delusional?!" episode that was released two weeks ago - I’m giving you an insight into the coaching session I had after a recent dating experience came to an end quicker than I expected it to. I’m taking you behind the scenes of the trauma work we did together, how I got closure for myself and discoveries I made about myself thanks to this experience.  

Here are the key topics covered:

1. Personal Healing Session: I discuss my session with Marie Houlden, a mindset coach and energy healer, who uses various modalities like breathwork, EFT, hypnosis, and trauma-informed techniques. For more on her work, go here*.

2. Emotional Turmoil: I openly share my emotional rollercoaster, including feelings of confusion, self-doubt, anger, and hurt after the breakup.

3. Seeking Closure: Find out whether I sent a final message to get closure or whether I chose to leave things with the first, angry message I sent him.

4. Reconnecting with Myself: Learn about the transformative, energy clearing technique that helps me gain clarity around what to do, release any past trauma and allows me to heal my heart. 

5. Reflection on the Relationship: I reflect on the dating experience and my emotional needs, as well as the fear of jumping into a full-blown commitment at this point in my life.

6. Moving Forward: I discuss what I did to further cement the closure for myself and how I'm open to new dating experiences, reaffirming my sense of self and purpose.

Join me on this journey of healing and self-discovery, demonstrating how moments of emotional turmoil can lead to growth and transformation.

Get Involved!

You can contribute your stories to the Date with Confidence Podcast here. Share your best or worst dating stories, your biggest icks, dating tips you think everyone should know or ask me anything about my dating life or a burning question you need an answer for.  

Resources

• The Breakup Bounce Back
• The Confidence Kit
• The Confidence Course

Get weekly-ish updates, exclusive offers and access behind the scenes gossip when you become a podcast insider.

Visit The Date with Confidence website here.

Follow The Date with Confidence Podcast on Instagram + follow your host Rebecca Hawkes here.

*affiliate link

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.