Key takeaway: Your emotions are not the problem in divorce. How you use them is.

Most divorce books say to leave your emotions at the door. Katherine Miller, author of The Emotionally Savvy Divorce, has a different take: your emotions can be your most valuable negotiation tool if you know how to work with them instead of fighting them.

Katherine and Corey discuss how to handle anxiety without making reactive decisions you will regret later, why fighting to be "right" often costs you happiness, and how to break out of exhausting conflict loops. She explains the three levels of conflict: positions ("I want the house"), interests ("I need stability"), and meaning ("I am a good parent"), and why most couples argue at the surface level.

If you are overwhelmed and want practical ways to negotiate more effectively, The Emotionally Savvy Divorce offers clear tools and real stories that will help you feel less alone and more strategic about what comes next.

Resources mentioned:

The Emotionally Savvy Divorce by Katherine Miller 

For people whose divorce has turned into a fight. You've been trying to be reasonable with someone who treats every concession as the opening for the next demand. Whether you're starting to fold or ready to torch the whole thing, this show is a system for getting through it without losing your mind. In a one-sided divorce, your calm is the weapon, not the weakness.

The show is a curriculum in three phases: Get Clear, Get Going, Get Your Life Back. Most episodes are solo; some are conversations with guests. Listen in order if you're early in the process. Every episode also stands on its own.

Corey Shapiro is a NYC divorce attorney. 25+ years in family law. Child of divorce.

The book and 1-on-1 coaching with Corey: https://gettingdivorced.org

New episodes Thursdays during the season.

Audio and video editing by Chris Mottram. Recorded at Melrose Podcasts NYC.

For information and entertainment only. Not legal advice. Consult a licensed attorney in your jurisdiction.