The Healing You Method with Gloria Lybecker

Is it safe to be real in community? How do you grow your capacity to love yourself? Is it possible to allow yourself to truly be who you really are, rather than who you’ve been told you are supposed to be? The following experience was written by a client as she took time to reflect on these very questions. “As I reflect on my experiences being in Gloria’s classes and receiving resonate empathy, many things come up for me. When I first joined her tele-calls several years ago, speaking up or even answering a question triggered my body and mind into complete overwhelm. Many times I would be curled up on the floor under a blanket praying that I would not be called on, not even having the resources to request that I just listen in. (I didn’t even know that just listening in was even an option.) I joined the class because it was recommended by my coach. She felt that it would be a safe place for me to receive support in community with others. Well, that was most definitely not my perception. I did not trust any of the participants to hold me with care or to even slightly understand me. At first, I was not able to take in any information that was being shared. When I was asked to make a feelings or needs guess, I would frantically search through the list of feelings and needs and just pick one that might fit. I definitely had trust issues, but I did trust my coach that this class would somehow benefit me and help me on my healing journey. Over time, my anxiety about showing up on the call began to diminish, and I would open up and share what was true for me. However, there would still be times when I would go into overwhelm and check out again. Eventually, I understood that even though I signed up for the class, I did not have to call in, and if I did call in, I could request that I just listen in. I also could hang up if I chose to do so. Or if at any time during the call I began to feel uncomfortable, I could message Gloria and request that she not call on me. It took me quite a while, but I finally learned that I had choice. Another thing that I noticed was that others on the call would show up with all kinds of emotions and experiences. Sometimes they would even cry. I couldn’t even imagine letting anyone hear me cry. And there were times when I would go into overwhelm on the call and tears would come, but I would not let anyone hear me cry, and sometimes if my emotions became too intense, I would just hang up. I wondered how everyone on the call seemed to share so easily while I struggled to share anything. I was pretty sure that everyone on the call would think I was just insanely crazy and wish that I would remain silent so they would not have to hear me. And I feared that if anyone found out who I really was, they would just annihilate me. So I was very selective on what I shared and how much I shared. One call will forever be remembered as it was during this one call when I began to feel my body again. What I shared needed to be seen and heard and held with the utmost care because that part felt completely vulnerable. I remember how my body responded when I started to feel again. What I now understand, is that during this call I began to feel safe in a radically different way. When I began to share and be completely authentic, the parts that had shut down finally felt safe to come out of hiding. And the pain that I felt was my body’s way of releasing all of the stories and emotions that had been locked up and held deep within. This was the start of an emotional pendulum that guided me in knowing when it was safe to share. The significance of this call is that I believe it marks the first time I was able to feel safe enough to trust the community. I imagine that my experience was very similar to an antelope who gets caught by a lion and knows that death is imminent, until the lion stepped away for whatever reason, and the antelope realizes that his life is not over and he can get up and run away. And after he has

Moving a human from trauma to healing requires the restructuring of emotional response. Both primary and secondary process emotions (conscious and pre-conscious) must be engaged and soothed (regulation of the sensitive limbic region of the brain). This must come in the form of new experiences. The experience of limbic neuroplasticity (the laying down of new neural pathways and responses) was deeply and beautifully expressed by a client in the following testimonial by Rhoda Ingstad. “Wow! What an eventful journey I have been on since my healing session with horse! During my session I couldn’t tell what was going on in my head or body. In the session you made the observation that the horse was making the greatest amount of expressions (licking, chewing, and yawning, etc.) during my session. I was not aware of that. Yet afterwards I felt that my whole chest area was cleared of tension and angst. It made no sense to me! While I was laying in my bed that night I kept trying to figure out what had happened, but finally I realized it was totally right brain and preverbal. It was then that I experienced a guttural sigh from the deepest part of my body. In your next group class, while I was trying to figure out what to share about my experience, I started having huge muscle spasms in my back that shook my whole body. (My back is where I have stored my entire trauma.) I had at least 6 of those huge spasms. I felt a huge shift and knew it was a continuation from my session with horse. I was still without words to explain it. Then, when later talking to my empathy buddy, I realized that the healing was all preverbal traumas and felt a great sense of relief. I felt forgiveness for my mother. I felt an openness all through the core of my body. Now when I breathe it feels like my breath goes all the way down to my toes!! The knots in my back have continued to release and go away. My words are coming back which is a huge healing and relief. I thank you from the bottom of my heart for this experience - even though my left brain couldn’t understand how being with a horse could facilitate healing!! I was doubtful anything could come from this, and yet it was the most powerful and deepest healing I have had!! The healing relied on the environment, YOUR SKILL, and AWARENESS, with the Black Horse’s RESONANCE!” With gratitude and love, Rhoda Ingstad Phoenix, AZ Limbic resonance gives an equine facilitated experience much of its magic. In the Healing with Horses model of Equine Facilitated Psychotherapy and Learning, the horses are recognized as sentient partners who are able to be in choice and communicate their opinions - with a sophisticated limbic view point. Each session allows a rich exploration of the shared emotion between client and horse. Emotion involves all of the brain and via the Autonomic Nervous System (ANS) the physical sensations of emotional states are felt, by horse and human alike. Horses have large and sensitive guts (and hearts) and are much larger resonant surfaces for receiving and responding to emotional information. There are three stages of limbic neuroplasticity between mammals: Create a limbic bond or connection; becoming curious about and engaged by each other (resonance) 
 Build mutual understanding and shared communication via challenges (regulation) 
 Experience a smooth partnership via an attached relationship (limbic revision) 
 By observing closely the relationship the client builds with the horse, we are able to "see" the subcortical or pre-conscious levels of process that are occurring in the relationship. We also glimpse the patterns that are below conscious awareness in human relationships for the client. Horses often mirror the suppressed emotion and "release" when a human recognizes a feeling they are experiencing in the moment. This brings the client back into congruence even if they are still feeling the emotion. The moment their authentic feelings are known, the horse will sigh, lick its lips, y

I’ve been thinking about grace a lot lately. It really got my attention one day when I was working hard outside with my husband, preparing a section of land to fence in as pasture for my horses. It was good, hard work, and I could see my dreams becoming reality before me. Dreaming out loud I told my husband, "So, I’m thinking we’ll put the fence out this direction," motioning with my hands to show where the fencing would go across the field. He invited me to walk with him as he showed me how he envisioned it would all come together."The fence will come out this way and go around the raised beds..." As I followed and listened to him I began to feel bewildered. This was not how I had imagined it would be, or what I thought we had agreed on. I began to pepper him with questions, my cadence shortened, and I felt my throat tense up. Before my eyes I saw him shut down - and for the life of me I couldn’t understand why! "Are you angry?" I asked him with surprise. "It’s just the way you talk." He said with a flat voice. "Ouch!" I felt stung. I watched him walk away as I felt tears build up behind my eyes. I walked around the green house, sat in the warm sunshine, held my head in my hands, and let the tears fall, stunned how quickly it seemed things fell apart. "Do you feel so sad and lonely - and do you need to know that you are valued and matter - no matter how you talk?" My compassionate witness gently made an empathy guess. "Yes, and I like to be spoken to with kindness," As I let the words and tears flow I gently tapped on my meridians. "when the way I talk bothers someone, I would like to be told with kindness." Silently I tracked my sensations, linking them to the beauty of the underlying needs. "Even though I feel tight tension in my temples, constriction in my throat, needing warmth, needing grace, feeling so low and miserable, right here, right now, I love myself anyway." "Grace, you really value grace." My compassionate witness acknowledged. "How are you living and modeling grace in your life? What does that look like right now?" I looked up to the sky and felt the warmth of the sun and gentle breeze on my face. "I live and model grace when I..." 1. Choose to attend to self-care in the moment meeting needs for warmth and self-connection 2. When I receive empathy and nurturance from my compassionate witness - who so kindly translates for my inner critic 3. When I slow down my inner experience by noticing and tracking my body’s sensations and emotions - linking them to divine needs 4. When I honestly express my truth, trusting I am heard and held by Spirit - something so much greater than myself 5. When I ask and trust Love to lead my way, acknowledging how very much Grace means to me and when I take the time to know what that looks like for me personally, and in my relationships. Grace sees with eyes of love even when others do not. Grace hears the heart of the hurting and the beauty of the needs beneath any words and actions that may have been taken. Grace compassionately understands the desperation, the overwhelm, the loneliness, the shame, even the anger, and Grace loves anyway. Grace is available and kind. I just need to be willing to receive Divine Grace - and then expand it by living it out in relationship with others. The tension in my temples released as a tingle radiated down my neck and shoulders, I took a deeper breath and let it out ever so slowly. Turning my thoughts back to the one who is my husband, I acknowledged to myself the complexity of life that he holds. My heart warmed with the depth of love I harbor for that man. Inspired by Grace, I went inside to make a repair with the man who so greatly contributes toward making my dreams become reality. What does Grace look like for you? Thanks for being on the journey with me today, Healing You. ..... *Are you ready to step into the light and out of the shadows, to experience the resonance of somatic empathy and warm accompaniment? You

Why do wealth and health so often intersect for wise people? And how can you become one of them? If you could be paid to do what you love – what would you be being paid to do? Notice the first image or thought that springs up. How does that feel in your body? Are you aware that in many ways your thoughts, emotions, beliefs, visualizations, and aspects of your spiritual life like prayer and meditation, can change the energy field of your body in a way that affects your gene regulation? And the genes most readily affected by them are your stress genes. The wealthiest and best-informed people have had access to this kind of information many years ahead of the general public. The connection between unresolved emotional trauma and disease is one of the most well-established links in medicine today. Yet new research reveals that when a subject vividly recalls a past trauma, and then applies an energy therapy, the emotional trauma attached to the memory often dissipates instantaneously, and doesn’t return. When you change your energy field, you change at a cellular level too. Remember when you were a kid, and when you changed where you were holding a magnet, the iron filings would quickly follow straight-away? This is a great metaphor for our energy fields and body. When you change your energy field, your magnet, the cells in your body are directly affected. Our cells are the same as the iron filings! By being willing to allow any emotionally traumatic events to be held within a depth-empathy process can open the way for any stuck energy to move freely back into the flow, which is like changing the magnets. So, what is the link between healing our emotional wounds and living from our souls? When we’re pulled this way and that way by our emotional reactions to triggering events, our attention is compulsively absorbed in them. The emotional sound track of the up and down waves can leave us little time to reflect, to envision, to discover, and to create. Our stress response, the “fight, flight, or freeze system”, is engaged any time we’re adversely emotionally triggered. When we’re stressed, a cascade of hormones floods our body, from adrenaline to cortisol, preparing us for emergencies that may never even occur. Just imagine what your life might look like if you could leave behind the stresses you experience today. Because when stress disappears, the stress hormone cortisol drops, you feel better, and you discover you’re capable of a whole new level of functioning! You have increased openness to abundance; you see new ways of delivering value to other people, and making money doing what you love! The well of joy and creativity can well up within you, empowering you to create the life of your dreams. When our ears aren’t filled with the prattle of reactivity and the harshness of lack mentality, our life becomes free of stress-generated automated actions and the need to repair multiple ruptures in relationships. Then the still, small voice of our soul can be heard. The music of the universal orchestra becomes clearer and louder in the silence created by the absence of the emotional anguish, and we are able to follow the whispering of our soul and live in divine harmony with others. Learning to go inside to hear our own answers, to connect with our body’s wisdom and our own divinity, opens the door to Knowing. Listening inwardly is essential if we are going to shift. Compassion is the key. Compassion includes tolerance of our humanity, and acceptance of what is inside us—both the dark and the light. Learning to forgive ourselves, to be conscious, aware and gentle with ourselves is vital. When we learn how to do that internally, we are empowered to offer it externally to others as well. To have accompaniment on your journey, reach out to me at www.HealingYouSanctuary.com I look forward to connecting with you. Thanks for being on the journey with me today, Healing You. ..... *Are you ready to step into the light and out

How do we lose our vital essence? And how can we reclaim vitality? Many of us today don’t feel completely whole, as if we are not all here. When we begin to become aware of this, we can open to the possibility of reclaiming the intimacy we once enjoyed. With support, we can recover our soul, the vital essence of life. I share with you today, a clients’ story, about welcoming back lost parts of herself who were willing to begin the journey home to wholeness. "What is trauma? Well for me it was total annihilation of my personal existence and I lost all feeling of any sensations. I didn’t consciously know this because my body and mind were blank; trauma completely numbed my capacity to sense any emotional or physical pain. Even my brain went numb so that I didn’t miss having fun, laughing, or really living. Trauma is timeless so when I got triggered, my body reacted as if the trauma was happening NOW, in the present moment. Whether the actual experience happened a year ago, a month ago, or even a week ago was not remembered. Because when these inner parts are triggered, my ability to perceive is filtered through the lens of the ever present past. I remember the first time I began to feel sensations again very vividly. I was lying in my hallway while on a conference call in one of Gloria’s classes. Something had triggered me and Gloria invited me to slow time down and asked if I was willing for my inner experience to be met with warmth right where I was in the moment. What stands out to me now is how my body felt during this call; because something shifted in me and I began to feel again, my whole body awakened and I could feel pain. I remember even my toes hurt. I recall lying in the hallway, curled up in a fetal position with tears streaming out of my eyes, and trying not to make those crying sounds - because I didn’t want anyone to hear me cry - I was telling myself if someone heard me crying I would die. In that moment past, present, and future blurred together and I have no memory whether I actually hid or if everyone on the call heard me. I don’t even remember specifically what was coming up for me. Yet, I can still see myself very clearly, lying in that hallway in the fetal position, with the phone up to my ear and tears streaming out of my eyes. I did not die, I could feel my body and allow the warmth of a compassionate presence to wash over me and feel felt. It is an experience that is forever cemented into my memory, receiving the gift of being welcomed just as I was, to begin my journey home." What causes the seeming loss of our vital essence? For many it may be the result of trauma; a part of our vital essence separates from us in order to survive the experience and escape the full impact of pain. We forget who we truly are and what was once true is replaced by the projections placed upon us by others; family, authority figures, and peers. It is possible to receive the help we need to remember who we truly are and why we were born into this world. It is our birthright to live our lives whole and help others to do the same. Addressing our past hurts and trauma can be a daunting prospect. If this is true for you, you certainly make sense just as you are, and I welcome you with the energies of tenderness and care to reach out to me today at www.HealingYouSanctuary.com Thanks for being on the journey with me today, Healing You. ..... *Are you ready to step into the light and out of the shadows, to experience the resonance of somatic empathy and warm accompaniment? You can start my course introducing The Healing You Method here: https://www.healingyousanctuary.com/intro … [The Healing You Method - Episode 190] #TheHealingYouMethod

Who are your voices? And what are they saying to you? We all have these internalized voices. Do you recognize what they represent to you in your life? Horses can support us to acknowledge what is in the moment. One day as one of my clients stood with her back to the corral, her eyes were closed and her arms hung at her side, I guided her through a body-centered process; her horse stood at the gate, his mouth licked and chewed as she tapped into her body’s wisdom. She first noticed fear in her belly, apprehension in her heart space, (her horse lifted a front foot and set it with a bang on the metal gate), she named fear in her belly once more, as tears sprang to her eyes and she crumpled forward, “I wasn’t going to cry, I never let anyone see my fear.” “You never let anyone see your fear… and you weren’t going to cry.” I paused a moment, “I’m guessing a little part of you might be needing acknowledgment what it’s like to be you in this moment,” I gently made an empathy guess, “needing to know that it’s safe to be vulnerable in this space? Needing trust and companionship right where you are?” “It wasn’t ever okay to cry when I was a kid, my dad would say, ‘stop crying’, and I couldn’t get angry either, I had to go to my room to be angry or cry - nobody could see me.” “Nobody could see you, really needing gentle support and loving-kindness perhaps, to be seen and heard for what it was like to be little you?” I guessed. “Everyone turns to me for help - who am I?” she cried, “Why do they always turn to me? I need as much help as everyone else!” “Would you like it if everyone had as much support as they needed, whenever they needed it, including little you?” I asked softly. Nodding her head, she opened her arms out from her sides, eyes still closed, then her arms moved down to her sides and hugged around her torso, with knees bent she gently swayed her body. “Allow your body to move however feels true to you.” I coached. “I feel waves rushing through me.” her hands demonstrated moving up from her pelvic floor out the top of her head. “Feeling waves of energy rushing through you, moving upwards like a fountain?” I asked, making a metaphorical guess. “Yeah,” slowly she straightened her posture, her face softened and she opened her eyes, and smiled through her tears. “Turn and face your horse, with your eyes open, what do you notice in your body now?” Once more I coached her through the body-centered process to receive the wisdom of her body. “My belly is calm and cool.” She replied with surprise in her voice. “If your belly is giving you a message, what might that be? Notice the first thing that pops up.” I coached. “Soothing.” She said with a smile. “I’m hearing your body is telling you, you need soothing.” Twice more I guided her through the process while she gazed upon her horse; she noticed where in her body her mind first went, named any sensations, and named the emotions within the sensations to receive the messages from her body. Still standing outside the corral, I invited her to bring her awareness into her heart, and extend that energy out to her horse. “From this place of heart connection with your horse… if you could experience your heart’s desire with your horse, what would that be?” “To feel safe.” She replied. “To feel safe,” I reflected back, “and what would that give you?” “Trust.” “And what would that look like?” “I could step in there with a horse larger than life and trust that I am safe!” “And what Authentic-Self Voice could you engage with to support your stepping into that trust and safety?” Slowing down the process she tried several “voices” checking in with her body each time to sense whether they felt “true”. “I trust myself.” That one felt too far away from where she was in the moment, so dialing it in a little closer she tried a slightly different version, “I am stepping into trust.” As if on cue, the horse stepped forward, stretched its neck over the fence an

What are two challenges you face moving forward? I have always wanted to learn how to drive a horse; my heart’s desire came true with Diva, at a Mindful Horsemanship Program several years ago. I remember stepping into the arena to stand behind Diva, I gathered the long reins in my hands, and prepared to move out. “What is your intention?” My coach asked. “I’ll move out to the right and pause by the big barrel, then make a big circle moving from right to left coming back down through the center of the arena.” “Want to step it up a notch?” she asked with a grin as she stood the big barrel up and moved small barrels to stand parallel in the center of the arena. “Sure!” “What are two challenges you face as you move forward with your vision?” “Hmm…” I thought for a moment, “being available for my 15-year-old son, whom I home-school, and feeling confident as I step out locally to be seen and known in my community as a valuable resource.” “Okay, which station represents your son and which represents confidence stepping out?” “The big barrel represents my son and the two smaller barrels in the center represent confidence stepping out.” I paused, mindfully took a belly breath, and straightened my posture. “Up!” I cued Diva with my voice, clicked my mouth and jiggled the reins. Slowly she shifted her weight and moved out to the right. Just like learning to drive a car, I over-corrected, now she moved to the left, back and forth I consistently over-corrected. “E-gads!” I clamored inside as a fog began to cloud my mind and tension crept into my shoulders. Slowing myself down inside I took a few deep belly breaths, and consciously lowered my shoulders. I noticed my body position in relationship to Diva and brought my body back into alignment behind her and centered in the power of my 3rd chakra. Again, I called out “Up, Diva!” What a difference! As we moved out I felt a distinct shift in my energy and in relationship with Diva, we felt connected energetically. “W-h-o-a…” we paused by the big barrel and I mindfully connected to the one who is my son, I recognized the importance of acknowledgment. How much it means to take the time to pause and check-in with the ones I love and BE in relationship with them, especially when I am shifting and changing my schedule in life. That pause had a time-less quality to it, stretching out energetically to capture the freedom of space and time, no pressure, no hurry, resting in my heart, centered in my values. Acknowledgement of how much I love my boy AND acknowledgment of how much I love partnering with Horse! I felt ready to step out as a valuable resource in the world as I jiggled the reins, “Up, Diva!”(I heard more energy in my own voice and Diva responded with a softer feel!) Half-way around the circle our synchronized movement was fueled and empowered with a rejuvenating confidence. My steps felt stronger and the sensation flowed up my legs and back, down my arms, into my belly, up my chest, and out my eyes. Wow - everything looked brighter, fresher, and more colorful as we stepped through the second station of barrels. We had found our flow together! Inspired by confidence we didn’t slow down, we looped out and circled back and stopped in the center claiming “Confidence.” My skin tingled from head to toe. That experience is imprinted into my being-ness, and continues to unfold in miraculous ways. When I returned home to my son, I noticed more opportunities to slow down and check-in with him, and to rest in the space that represented our relationship with confidence. Thank you, Diva. Thanks for being on the journey with me today, Healing You. ..... *Are you ready to step into the light and out of the shadows, to experience the resonance of somatic empathy and warm accompaniment? You can start my course introducing The Healing You Method here: https://www.healingyousanctuary.com/intro … [The Healing You Method - Episode 188] #TheHealingYouMethod

Did you know that Horses can read your thoughts and emotions? They have an innate ability to give honest feedback and naturally use their bodies to "know" the world. As sensitive, sentient beings, they are in a unique position in the animal kingdom to teach us in ways never before possible - accelerating learning exponentially in ways we can apply to our lives immediately that creates lasting change. I remember working with a group of youth one day, during an activity each participant wrote down on a tag something they treasured and wanted to protect about themselves. Then they each shared what they treasured with the group, and tied their tag onto the chosen horse’s mane. One girl, we’ll call her Anna, shared, "I’d like to protect who I am, meaning everything about myself, cause I’m accepting who I am!" Next, as a group they built a boundary they thought fitting for that horse and attempted to keep the horse, which now represented what each one individually treasured about his/her self, safe in the boundary. As the horse repeatedly stepped out of the boundary, the group’s ability to communicate verbally decreased. In the silence a boy, John, looked around, he saw several ropes at the edge of the round pen and walked over to begin tying them together. Anna acknowledged, "I have no idea what to do, I’m just going to follow him." The other youth followed suit and only using body language John got each one to hold the rope a few feet around the horse, forming a circle to keep it safe. We took a little break while we discussed the next activity, which was to name what could tempt each of them to give up the power to protect their individual boundaries. "Peer pressure!" Anna exclaimed. Looking at the course set up in the corral, I asked her, "Which obstacle best represents peer pressure to you?" "The logs in a row," she said solemnly, "they could trip you up." Working as a group they created boundaries at each obstacle to protect the horse from the temptations (buckets with a little grain in them). When they were finished I acknowledged, "Sometimes we need time to think ahead and build strong boundaries against temptations." Feeling ready, they led the horse all together through the course, making boundaries as needed to protect what they treasured about themselves from temptations. As they drew near to the logs and the temptation marked "peer pressure" the horse rushed past them, stuck her nose into the bucket of grain, and got a tasty bite! Surprised and struggling to protect who she represented (themselves) from further temptation, the group found themselves with everyone on the same side of the horse! Finally one boy hollered out, "Go!" and like a catalyst they gained momentum once more and moved through the rest of the course. In the debriefing circle I asked the group, "What happened?" "Peer pressure got the best of us!" John said with wide eyes. "We were communicating with body language, using words might have helped." Another boy responded, "It was kind of tricky, tricky and hard." "Society, rules and peer pressure can trip you up," Anna observed, "you need good relationship skills to keep your boundaries safe." Horses are large and powerful animals. Accomplishing a task involving a horse, in spite of fears or perceived limitations, creates self-confidence and provides metaphors for dealing with challenging situations in real life. Horses mirror exactly what our body, emotions, thoughts and energy is communicating to them, and their honesty makes them especially effective messengers. In addition, their natural responsiveness to clear intention can empower us to discover and accomplish our goals. What question are you sitting with in your life that you could bring to the work with the horses? I invite you to begin your exploration today. Thanks for being on the journey with me today, Healing You. ..... *Are you ready to step into the light and out of the shadows, to experience the reso

When people experience trauma, their symptoms may last months or years, with triggers that can bring back memories of the trauma accompanied by intense emotional and physical reactions. Today I want to share with you how one of my clients experienced stepping into the constellation field with a horse. Terrified of not mattering, being abandoned, and cast aside in her relationships, she came to Healing You Sanctuary to begin to heal her traumatic history. We went outside to the round pen and I asked her to build a magic room, a place she could go and feel safe. There were a variety of materials available in the round pen, and I had turned out Saphira, my mare, to provide female companionship. Let me share her experience in her words. "Being asked to build a place to feel safe felt confusing. I put a chair and a stick and string in the round pen. I thought, "I really don’t need anything to feel safe with Saphira." So I just stood, looking at all the other things and decided I needed some support in knowing what was expected. I told myself "I won’t be given any expectations as to what to choose, because there are no expectations being placed upon me." I struggled with my inner thoughts and then grabbed three noodles and one hula hoop to make two safe zones; one being the hula hoop and the other being a triangle made from the noodles. Then I went back and got all of the noodles and hula hoops and made a passage that represented the way out. I placed the hula hoops opposite of the passage way interconnected by the noodles. Each of the circles represented a different safe place that I could retreat to if fear arose, and each of these safe places were inter-connected. I asked Saphira if I could connect with her, but inside I was afraid she would just walk away and leave me, and she did walk away! I was so fearful that she would run away and she actually mirrored my inner world, she lifted her head and began running around the round pen, whinnying loudly, stopping and looking around her and then running and whinnying again. It was really big energy. I could see the other horse had walked into the barn so she could no longer see him, and wondered why he was not responding to her whinny. Then I saw myself in her actions, how she was responding in fear, because she could not see the other horse, is exactly how I have acted or reacted in my relationships. As I named this truth, she slowed down, and then went back to grazing in peace. Debriefing afterwards, as I was talking about needing safety, Saphira stepped into my hula hoop representing safety. And when I spoke about needing safety in the world, she walked through my path, the passage representing the way out. And, when I named my truth about my fear of my friend leaving, Saphria walked over and nosed me. She "knows" when I speak my truth. I notice now the story of abandonment has lightened, and I am able to speak my truth without being made wrong or shamed. I am seen, and greeted, and resonated with right where I am at. What I am taking away from this experience is that I have a new awareness; I can notice projections and choose to let them go and not take them in. I can even notice when I project onto others, and, when this happens, I can name my inner experience so I can be free, living in congruence with my truth.” That was a powerful session. Constellation work offers a particular way of looking at questions and the blocks we have in our lives. It is a spatial exploration of a relational question, using different positions, representatives, objects, people or horses to look at how things are connected with one another and where systems might be frozen by entanglements or traumas. I always marvel how incredible it is that horses support us to remember who we are on our journey home. They can take us to a land that is foreign to most people, a journey into ourselves; an exploration of our mind, body, and spirit connection. Many people may never make this journey

I worked with a young man one time, and it was tough. I remember hearing him cry out in despair, "I just want to kill myself!" When you hear those words, spoken in pain by someone you care for, how do you feel inside? Does your stomach clench and spasm? Or does a semi-paralysis claim your whole body and your breathing nearly stop? How do you hold space with love and support for someone when they are experiencing a primal response from the ever-present-past of trauma? We may not be aware of a past trauma holding us back in the moment when we are triggered, yet in attempting to protect us, our hypothalamus and triple warmer can lock us into outdated defensive strategies that rigidify our habit field. It is not possible for a person to think clearly when the blood has left the forebrain and moved into the limbs for fight or flight. Even though many people know the kinds of changes they want to make, they find themselves unable to make change happen. Trapped in habits from the past, they may put tremendous effort into willing themselves to change patterns that are emotionally locked into their body. This can increase their experiences of inner discouragement, cynicism, and self-loathing. Self-talk is not enough to change a primal response; however, there are energy techniques that can open your habit field for reprogramming. When your energies are freed for healing and creativity, your mind will follow. Three approaches for reprogramming the habit field are: (1) Defusing traumatic residue that is already in your habit field; (2) Programming higher frequencies into your habit field; and (3) Evoking your habit field to embrace a new physiological or psychological pattern. Each time that you are able to keep the blood from leaving your brain as you process stress and/or trauma, you are showing your brain a new strategy, and your habit pattern begins to transform. As your body learns to tolerate increasing amounts of stress before invoking the fight-or-flight response, your sense of health and well-being will also increase. After I worked with a child to reprogram his stress response, I asked, "What is the most important thing you can remember to tell yourself when you notice stress coming up?" "I love myself," he responded with warmth, "and I am going to take good care of myself and my energy forever." When we make time in our lives to drop out of our busy world and regularly receive support to focus our compassionate awareness on our body (rather than distancing ourselves and treating our body as our enemy) we can learn to begin to cherish our body. When we tune in to our body’s subtle cues with curiosity and care, we can understand the energies of our body and attend to its needs. And as we learn how to turn on our body’s energies, we can begin to unravel deeply embedded patterns of stress and trauma, forming resilient patterns of well-being. To receive accompaniment on your journey, reach out to me at HealingYouSanctuary.com Thanks for being on the journey with me today, Healing You. ..... *Are you ready to step into the light and out of the shadows, to experience the resonance of somatic empathy and warm accompaniment? You can start my course introducing The Healing You Method here: https://www.healingyousanctuary.com/intro … [The Healing You Method - Episode 178] #TheHealingYouMethod #TheHealingYouMethod