November 16th is my mom’s birthday. My mom would have been 62. I love this side of grief because I can see that my mom’s birthday is still her birthday even if she is no longer on this Earth. That is the day she was born. I can celebrate her and know that she had an impact on this world. 

This year I released my second book! Everyone Has A Love story which whew!!!! That book! I challenged myself!

Also, When the HealingSheGotFaith Talk Show started on a radio platform, it was on this day or around it. I was on a radio platform, but obviously, I am on my own now. And actually, I started the Talk Show in 2020 in April but it was only supposed to be an “event” in correspondence to the blogs I used to write. So, it was dope to be in a position to be on the radio for a little bit and get that experience. I want to take this episode to discuss what I envision this season of my life would look like if my parents were here.I also want to discuss how I feel about this new book!!!!

November 16th is my mom’s birthday. My mom would have been 62. I love this side of grief because I can see that my mom’s birthday is still her birthday even if she is no longer on this Earth. That is the day she was born. I can celebrate her and know that she had an impact on this world. 

This year I released my second book! Everyone Has A Love story which whew!!!! That book! I challenged myself!

Also, When the HealingSheGotFaith Talk Show started on a radio platform, it was on this day or around it. I was on a radio platform, but obviously, I am on my own now. And actually, I started the Talk Show in 2020 in April but it was only supposed to be an “event” in correspondence to the blogs I used to write. So, it was dope to be in a position to be on the radio for a little bit and get that experience. I want to take this episode to discuss what I envision this season of my life would look like if my parents were here.I also want to discuss how I feel about this new book!!!!

Today, we are in episode 95. I want to connect on How I Feel. It is a week before the holidays. Maybe you went through a breakup, job loss, family not acting right, money not right. A lot is happening in life, and the holidays are here, so what are we doing? Let’s hop into the conversation of “How I Feel.”

So, I got this idea to practice How I Feel. After talking to someone about a project, the idea was dropped to express my feelings. Since I do something on all the days that represent grief for me. The idea was given to express what was going on on the inside truly. This is the new version of Grief, Healing, and Holidays. Instead of the traditional grief groups, we do paint nights and express our feelings. We need permission to grieve, heal, and feel.  How I feel right now is I am at peace. But I have had to make decisions about people. Grief is so much more than death. We grieve relationships, opportunities, dreams, people, friends, and more. I am a grieving person who really wanted to be on this ride with me. But they didn't choose me. I am grieving my parents not being here. I wish they were here to see my accomplishments. I wish I had my person. I am grieving the love I thought I had with people. I am grieving the visions and dreams I thought I would have. So, I feel right now I am at peace. I’ve cried, but what’s important to me right now is me. I am at a place of being present, at peace and doing what I want. I do not want to beg anyone to be here. I do not want anyone to be here who does not want to. Connections flow. My therapist told me on my birthday that we forget that humans are humans. Humans will hurt us. They will neglect us. Ghost us. And not show up. Humans will have good intentions but fail. We oftentimes forget to allow humans to be human. That is a game-changer for me. I say this all the time, and I need to practice this all the time. In this moment of How I Feel, I forgot to allow the people around me to be human, AND with that, I had to be okay with letting people go and moving forward. I used to always say, you can be who you are and do what you do but I do not have to deal with it. And so, I had to be reminded of that. Be human. 

Welcome to Episode 94-Grief, Healing & Holidays-Children's Grief Awareness (November 16th, 2023)

According to the Childhood Bereavement Estimation Model (CBEM), ⚫ 1 in 12 (or more than 8 percent) of children in the US will experience the death of a parent or sibling by age 18-equating to 6 million bereaved US children and teens. This number doubles to 14.7 million when the age is increased to 25.

Children's Grief Awareness Day is designed to help us all become more aware of the needs of grieving children and the benefits they obtain through the support of others. Children's Grief Awareness Day is an opportunity to ensure that grieving children receive the support they need.

Children who have had someone die—especially a close family member—can feel the loss forever. They eventually go back to school. They might pick some activities back up. They certainly look "normal." And yet there's still that hole inside.

Children's Grief Awareness Day began in Pennsylvania from a desire on the part of students to do more to bring attention to what their grieving classmates were coping with, for the most part, in silence. This initiative grew out of an ongoing partnership of the Highmark Caring Place with hundreds of schools across the state.

After learning more about the work of the Caring Place and learning about how alone and misunderstood their peers often feel after a death, Caring Place staff and these students worked together to inaugurate the first Children's Grief Awareness Day in 2008.

Many people don’t realize that it takes most children much longer to deal with their grief than we expect and that the amount of inner turmoil, invisible to most, is much more intense than we have any idea of. We raise awareness so that people will realize that even if there is no outward sign of inner turmoil, those storms can still be raging inside a grieving child’s heart.

We raise awareness so that people will understand that a grieving child can't just "get over it"—not in any set period, not by any act of their own will—and that there's no reason that they should just "get over it."

Children are people, too. Time we want children to stay in their child’s place, but when they experience a loss or grief, like a little bit of their childhood is taken away, unless an active adult is deciding to helo with that a lot of the time, the adults in those young people’s lives are grieving too. 

We want to treat children as children and expect them to operate as adults. 

Children need us. No matter if you’re a parent or not. If you work with children up until 18, they need us. 

Episode 93-Grief, Healing & Holidays-I am hosting this holiday season. How do I take a break?

My business is prosperous. I rejoice in other people’s success because I know there is plenty for everyone.

I forgive all PAST experiences. I accept all that I have created for myself-my, past and present. I am willing to allow my future to happen. 

I am in the right place, at the right time, and doing the right thing. I see myself healthy, whole, and living in a society where it is safe for me to be who I am and to love others

Topic: I am Hosting the Holidays this Year.How Do I take break?

We tend to get wrapped up in other people’s expectations. 

I’ve heard everything from kids to parents to spouses. 

While all this is valid, let’s start with giving ourselves permission to take break.

We work all day everyday. This is anyone, Single, married, coupled, whatever.

We are going through it. 

Yes, there is a lot of pressure, but in order to show up for you, you have to give yourself permission to rest. 

Your family, needs to remember and wants you to be your best self. 

You can not if you feel like you are running ragedy. 

How you gonna be there for your family if you’re tired.

No one wants to be around a grumpy, disengaged, overworked and tired person. We do not get our best selves in that realm. 

It’s okay to take a break from cooking. 

Cooking on holidays takes a long time anyways. 

Operate in healing and not survival. Easier said than done, start with giving yourself permission. 

Affirmation: I give myself permission to take a break and lower the expectations, especially during the holidays

**Please remember that the information provided is not a substitute for services provided by a mental health professional. In an emergency, please call 911. You can also call 988 for mental health support and resources. In a non-emergency, you can go to healingshegotfaith.org/resources for additional resources.**

Welcome to Episode 91- Grief Season- 1 year of Grand Opening

Today I choose hope

Self-Empowerment Deck

What is my greatest fear in life? What if I could magically overcome it?

Topic: One year of owning a Brick & Mortar!

Last week, we walked through some thoughts on Reddit. I tried to give a light episode since the last couple of episodes were pretty heavy.

This week will also be a light episode!

Let’s talk about opening a physical building! What I learned, liked, and wish I would have known!

My siblings and I hopped on a cheap building and purchased it. We had big plans!

A couple of things I learned:

Just because you own/pay cash does not mean it is yours. These municipalities, local governments, and neighborhoods have their own rules. They do not care that you’re a business owner. 

Business licenses are a joke. You pay them every year, and you have to pay them to each municipality you are operating in or figure out the policies and rules for when you conduct business.

For example, I have a business license in the municipality my building is in. But I have had to get other paperwork and permits if I decide to vend at a pop-up shop if I work in a school, or something like that. My business license is mostly for my physical building. Of course, I have my LLC and EIN, and I am legal in my state.

So much goes into it. 

What I do love about my building is that it is mine. I made it feel like home. People are comfortable. As much bad stuff that I went through, the way it came out was amazing. The coffee bar, the memorial wall, the couch, and just the comfort. I feel at home. I feel safe. 

People feel that way too. People love the space. I love being there. I can be free and who I am. I can take a nap there. I can sleep there. I feel safe there. It is mine.

Affirmation: I let go of expectations and trust the process. 

Ice breaker: Self-Care Empowerment Deck:

How I have I demonstrated strength recently? How did it make me feel?

Dream Cards Deck:

What makes your heart beat faster? Believe the signals your heart sends to you. When you learn to listen to your heart, you’ll begin to follow it. 

Topic: Reading Reddit-Thoughts of Grief and Loss

The last couple of episodes have been heavy, so let’s turn to social media and see what social media is saying about grief

The Grief Guide

The Grief Gang

The Grief Project

Learning about grief helps us to know how we deal with it. It helps us to learn, adjust, and move forward. 

We can become comfortable in grief. 

Affirmation: I can be healed, okay, and enjoy life even in grief.