The Hidden Why Podcast

Where does stress arise from? When are you next stress try to pause for a moment and reflect on why? Is it a consequence of living attached to future expectations?

In this episode, my thought is that when we live in the future by holding on or clinging to some desired outcome or expectation we put ourselves in a position of vulnerability. The possibility that the attached expectation will not be met if circumstance challenges us.

As we are well aware, many of the circumstances of life are outside our direct control. What is in our control is an ability to let go of expectations. It’s okay to have expectations but don’t cling to them. If you do you might just find yourself more stressed when things don’t go according to plan.

Please, have a listen and let me know what you think.

In this episode, I speak with Stuart Friedman about cross-cultural dynamics in efforts to better understand how we can improve our relationships. Culture as he defines it is "how things get done." In understanding how others do things, based on their beliefs and values, we can hopefully knock down cultural barriers that lead to ineffectiveness. It starts by understanding our own values and beliefs. 

For more than 30 years, Stuart has been cultivating his passion for organizational behaviour, international travel and world cultures.

“Self-discipline is the root quality that will improve every aspect of your life.” Jocko Willink

Inspired by a talk that Jocko Willink gave as a guest on the Tim Ferris Show. Jocko said the words to this affect - that taking action is the key to success. I couldn’t agree more. If we don’t put one foot in front of the next and step forward into the challenge, change and the unfamiliar we won’t progress and evolve.

Action is key! However, I couldn’t help think about all those people that know this but still struggle to find the motivation to get started. In this episode that is the subject that I will address – how do we source the motivation to take action?

This is a replay interview I did with Eric Zimmer - host of The One You Feed Podcast. He is a big believer in the wolf theory that he describes as that we become the one we feed. We both have both the good and bad wolf within us and if we feed the good wolf we become the good wolf – feed the bad wolf and we become the bad wolf.

The wolf theory states that we become the one we feed. We both have both the good and bad wolf within us and if we feed the good wolf we become the good wolf – feed the bad wolf and we become the bad wolf.

It's a conversation about addiction, with Eric taking us along his journey highlighting what he did to break free. Dramatic change is possible!

Finish - give yourself the gift of done by Jon Acuff.

The battle is perfectionism. I think that just about sums up the premise of this book. In the face of perfectionism, we struggle to finish all that we start. It can sometimes be the reason why we don't start things in the first place but as Jon explains beautifully beginning is not the most significant hurdle, finishing is.

Jon Acuff has written a book to inspire all of us to finish. To not give in to being perfect.The book is easy to read with clear insights, tips and techniques to what it takes to finish.

Have a listen to my full review and thoughts here at The Hidden Why.

“Be Impeccable With Your Word. Speak with integrity. Say only what you mean. Avoid using the word to speak against yourself or to gossip about others. Use the power of your word in the direction of truth and love.” Don Miguel Ruiz

Why sharing our feelings helps but venting only supports the ego that may induce and lead us into further suffering?

We’ve all heard about the benefits associated to positive affirmations. Dan McGinn, the author of Psyched Up, talks about the power in performance by using a technique called reappraisal. Similar to affirmations it’s about reinforcing the positive stories we tell ourselves to booster confidence and reduce anxiety.

Venting is often a focus on the negative. And it doesn't just involve kicking a chair or screaming at the top of our lungs. Venting evolves into inner dialogue that is too often negative in nature.

In an interview I did with Cy Wakeman she said venting only promotes the ego. And if the ego if not controlled it can take us down paths we do not wish to walk. Venting assists it to do that.

The ego is a story that we cling to, especially if we are not aware, that will lead us further into a state that is not conducive to success, performance or a positive sense of well-being.

Cy’s thoughts were that we should not vent but share. In sharing, we can express our feelings and such expression is good for healing. Such expression is good for moving forward with your life.

Venting, on the other hand, forces us to attach to a story that is not real, negative and often blown out of proportion. It takes the focus away from any lessons that may arise from an awareness of our feelings to focus on inner narration that is false and misleading.

Next time you want to vent or are told to vent, stop yourself. Instead, seek to understand why you feel that way. Share your feelings either in self-reflection and thought or with another, explore its truth and depth. Then in understanding perhaps you can avoid future occurrences and more importantly you can move on with life in a more positive and happy state.

Julian Baggini is a writer, best-selling author, and philosopher. This is a discussion that explores the dimensions of reason, rationality, critical thinking. Why it's important and how we can establish more healthy debate that may just be critical of our continual progress. 

We then discuss the topic of "truth." What it is, why it's relevant and how we can go about establishing the truth. Two very important themes form this wonderful conversation.  

Julian is passionate about small thoughts about big things; big thoughts about small things; expansive ideas in few words;  seeds of thought, scattered to either take root or not. Welcome the website of the writer Julian Baggini.

“Masters are not experts because they take a subject to its conceptual end, they are masters because they realise there isn’t one.” Sarah Lewis

Is self-mastery a mindset? Are we all able to achieve our full potential or is mastery only available to those with the resources or pre-existing talent?

Mastery is the comprehensive knowledge or skill on a particular subject. However, there is always more to learn as time passes and subjects change and evolve, and therefore self-mastery is a continuous, infinite and forever expansive.

“We thrive not when we’ve done it all but when we still have more to do.” Sarah Lewis.

These days, it’s often easier to avoid face-to-face contact in favor of technological shortcuts. In this episode, Michael Gelb, the author of The Art of Connection, shares not only why real interaction is crucial in building meaningful relationships but are also the key to creating innovative ideas and solving our most intractable problems.

We begin our discussion on the topic of 'how to think' with Michael referring to the work in an early book - How to Think Like Leonardo da Vinci. In discussing each of the "seven steps to genius" Michael makes a clear connection between how they relate to building better relationships and the art of connection. That both he and I agree is an integral part of raising our well-being and living a meaningful life.

Peak - a great book about the benefits of Deliberate Practice.

Deliberate practice is the purposeful and systematic approach to practising a particular skill by continually pushing yourself outside your comfort zone

Ericsson and co-author Pool do a fantastic job in breaking the myths of what it takes to become an expert in any skill. They deliver and clarify decades of research and offer new and sometimes counterintuitive methodology in breaking down the “barriers” of mastery.

You can enjoy my review here at The Hidden Why.