The Hole Shebang

Low libido after a baby or through menopause is one of the most common and least honestly discussed changes in a woman's life. In the 100th episode of The Hole Shebang, Kristen Parise welcomes back the guest who started it all, Dr. Nan Wise, cognitive neuroscientist and certified sex therapist, for the deep conversation they only grazed the first time. Together they look at why the postpartum months and the menopause years look so alike in the brain, what spontaneous and receptive desire really are, and why rebuilding pleasure outside the bedroom matters more than any pressure to have sex. If your desire has gone quiet and you have been told to just live with it, this episode explains what is actually happening and what you can do about it.

This episode is brought to you by SRC Health. Shop SRC garments at blueberrytherapyshop.ca and use the code SRC15 for 15% off.

In This Episode

• [00:21] Why Nan is the perfect Episode 100 guest, and why the first conversation is still the show's most downloaded
• [01:08] Postpartum and menopause as the two most vulnerable thresholds, and how the chemistry of caretaking quiets desire
• [05:25] Spontaneous desire versus receptive desire, and why arousal can come before wanting
• [08:05] Kindling a fire: making desire intentional instead of waiting to feel horny
• [10:30] The seeking system and the pleasure playground, moving sex beyond genitals and friction
• [11:52] Pleasure outside the bedroom: savouring, gratitude, mindfulness, imagery, and self compassion
• [20:49] Why some older adults have better sex, and why connection beats performance
• [24:12] Donating orgasms to science: what Nan's fMRI research found about the aroused brain
• [30:54] Entrainment and the get in touch plan for couples, including erectile changes
• [42:14] What chronically broken sleep does to dopamine and pleasure, and how to rest anyway

What You Will Learn

Listeners will come away understanding that a drop in desire after a baby or in menopause is normal, common, and workable, not a personal failing. They will learn the difference between spontaneous and receptive desire and why that distinction changes everything about how to approach intimacy. They will get concrete, gentle practices for rebuilding the capacity for pleasure, from savouring and gratitude to Nan's step by step get in touch plan for couples. And they will hear the neuroscience that makes the case that pleasure and orgasm are good for the aging brain and body, not a luxury to feel guilty about.

About Dr. Nan Wise

Dr. Nan Wise is a cognitive neuroscientist, a certified sex therapist, a board certified clinical hypnotherapist, and a certified relationship specialist. She holds a PhD in cognitive neuroscience from Rutgers University in Newark, where she is an associate research professor, and her dissertation research used fMRI to map what happens in the brain during arousal and orgasm. She is the author of Why Good Sex Matters, and her current work focuses on anhedonia, the loss of the ability to feel pleasure, and what she calls healthy hedonism. This is her second appearance on The Hole Shebang, following the show's most downloaded episode.

Theme Song: Kashmir by Led Zeppelin

Our Sponsor: SRC Health

SRC makes medical grade compression garments for pregnancy, bladder leaks and mild pelvic organ prolapse. The Restore short is the one Kristen reaches for most in clinic. It supports your pelvic organs while you and your pelvic floor physiotherapist do the strengthening work.

Blueberry Therapy has carried SRC garments for years. Shop the full range at Blueberry Shop, same price as buying direct and shipped from the clinic in Canada. Use the code SRC15 for 15% off.

Many extended health plans cover compression garments with a prescription, so check your benefits before you assume you are paying out of pocket.

Key Topics Covered

• Low libido after a baby and in menopause
• Spontaneous desire versus receptive desire
• Pleasure outside the bedroom and healthy hedonism
• The neuroscience of arousal, orgasm, and the aging brain
• Slowing down, connection, and the get in touch plan for couples

Resources and References Mentioned

• Why Good Sex Matters by Dr. Nan Wise: https://askdoctornan.com/book/
• Dr. Nan Wise's website, where a book receipt earns a free session with a Core Motion analysis test: https://askdoctornan.com
• Insight Timer, the free meditation app, home of the 40 day mindfulness course, deep rest meditations, and progressive muscle relaxation: https://insighttimer.com
• The Joy of Sex by Alex Comfort, the classic Nan suggests browsing like a menu of ideas
• Beverly Whipple, Nan's mentor and the researcher who named the G spot, and her concept of pleasure mapping
• Dr. Kelly Casperson, urologist and author, mentioned as a great voice on desire
• Science Vs, the podcast whose orgasm episode featured Nan's research

Listen to More Episodes Like This

• Why Good Sex Matters: The Neuroscience of Pleasure with Dr. Nan Wise (Episode 1, Nan's first appearance): https://podcast.blueberrytherapy.ca
• Mindfulness to Improve Sexual Desire with Dr. Lori Brotto: https://podcast.blueberrytherapy.ca
• Perimenopause as Your Sexual Debut: Rewriting the Narrative with Taylor McConnachie: https://podcast.blueberrytherapy.ca
• Super Traits and the Real Reason Your Sex Drive Disappeared with Dr. Jordin Wiggins: https://podcast.blueberrytherapy.ca

Connect with Dr. Nan Wise

• Website: https://askdoctornan.com
• Instagram: @askdoctornan
• Book: Why Good Sex Matters

Keep Going with Blueberry Therapy

If a drop in desire or pain with sex is part of your story, pelvic health physiotherapy can help. Learn more or book a discovery call at https://blueberrytherapy.ca. Nan gave the keynote at our 2025 event, so keep an eye on The Pleasure Principle for what is next.

Subscribe to The Hole Shebang at https://podcast.blueberrytherapy.ca, and if this episode made you feel less alone, leave a review and tell us what you want to hear next.

Connect with The Hole Shebang on Instagram @blueberrytherapypelvichealth

Eating disorders in kids and teens surged during the pandemic, and the earliest warning signs are the ones most parents miss. In this episode of The Hole Shebang, registered dietitian Kim Doyle explains how disordered eating starts, what intuitive eating actually asks of you and why a missing period is a signal to act on. Kim watched pediatric eating disorder referrals explode in 2020 while waitlists stretched 12 to 18 months, so she founded Brant Nutrition in Brantford, Ontario to catch the families the system was leaving behind. She also shares her own recovery from disordered eating as a competitive wrestler, including the pelvic floor assessment that changed everything.

This episode is brought to you by SRC Health. Shop SRC garments at blueberrytherapyshop.ca and use the code SRC15 for 15% off.

In This Episode

• [00:00] How Kim became a dietitian, starting with a weight based sport
• [06:35] Summer 2020: the referral surge and 12 to 18 month waitlists
• [11:45] What disordered eating actually means
• [14:45] Kim's own story: cutting weight, restriction and the injury cycle
• [21:50] The labral tear that led her to a pelvic floor physio
• [25:25] Intuitive eating explained (so much more than eat whatever you want)
• [29:00] The pulse practice: a three minute interoception exercise
• [33:45] RED-S and why a missing period should never be ignored
• [38:10] Warning signs of disordered eating in children
• [44:00] Resources for families
• [47:35] What recovery looks like and how long it takes
• [53:00] Where to find Kim and Brant Nutrition
• [56:10] Kim's theme song

What You Will Learn

Listeners will come away knowing the difference between changing your diet for a real physical reason and changing it to quiet a fear, the specific pattern of illogical food rules that flags trouble in kids as young as 8, and how the language adults use about their own bodies is absorbed by the children listening. Kim also teaches the pulse practice step by step and explains what actually happens inside the body during RED-S, including why bone density pays the price.

About Kim Doyle, RD

Kim Doyle is a Registered Dietitian and the owner of Brant Nutrition in Brantford, Ontario. A member of the College of Dietitians of Ontario since 2010 and the International Association of Eating Disorders Professionals, she spent seven years in pediatric home care before founding her clinic in March 2021. Brant Nutrition is a weight inclusive, non diet practice covering pediatric feeding, eating disorder recovery, gut health, mental health and sports nutrition, virtual across Ontario.

Theme Song: Born This Way by Lady Gaga

Our Sponsor: SRC Health

SRC makes medical grade compression garments for pregnancy, bladder leaks and mild pelvic organ prolapse. The Restore short is the one Kristen reaches for most in clinic. It supports your pelvic organs while you and your pelvic floor physiotherapist do the strengthening work.

Blueberry Therapy has carried SRC garments for years. Shop the full range at Blueberry Shop, same price as buying direct and shipped from the clinic in Canada. Use the code SRC15 for 15% off.

Many extended health plans cover compression garments with a prescription, so check your benefits before you assume you are paying out of pocket.

Key Topics Covered

• Pediatric eating disorders and the pandemic surge
• Intuitive eating and interoception
• Disordered eating warning signs in kids
• RED-S, amenorrhea and bone health
• Weight inclusive, non diet nutrition care
• Family based treatment (the Maudsley method)
• The pelvic floor and body connection

Resources and References Mentioned

• NEDIC, the National Eating Disorder Information Centre: Canada's national helpline, provider directory and starting point for families
• Kelty Eating Disorders (Kelty Mental Health Resource Centre): meal support videos and family resources that model how to support a child through meals
• The New Maudsley Approach: carer skills and tools behind the family based treatment Kim uses
• Family based treatment for eating disorders (research review): the evidence behind the leading approach for pediatric eating disorders
• The Intuitive Eating Workbook for Teens: a hands on workbook for building a healthy relationship with food
• When Your Teen Has an Eating Disorder by Lauren Muhlheim: the family based treatment guide Kim recommends

Listen to More Episodes Like This

Find them all at podcast.blueberrytherapy.ca:

• From Your Plate to Your Pleasure: Food, Body Image, and Intimacy with Emily Arthur, RD (Kim's teammate at Brant Nutrition)
• Body Brilliance: Connecting the Dots Between Emotional Eating, Hormones and Pelvic Health with Amber Romaniuk
• Pediatric Pelvic Health: Kids Don't Grow Out of It with Keri Martin Vrbanac

Our pediatric team at Blueberry Therapy treats constipation, bedwetting and pelvic floor concerns in kids, and our multidisciplinary team supports the gut and bowel side of everything discussed here.

Connect with Kim

• Website: brantnutrition.com
• Instagram: @brantnutrition and @brantnutrition_pediatrics
• Email: [email protected]

Keep the Conversation Going

Subscribe to The Hole Shebang at podcast.blueberrytherapy.ca, leave a review if this episode helped you and book a free fifteen minute discovery call at blueberrytherapy.ca. Connect with The Hole Shebang on Instagram @blueberrytherapypelvichealth.

Shockwave therapy for painful sex is one of the most promising and least understood tools in pelvic health, and this episode of The Hole Shebang breaks it down without the hype. Kristen Parise sits down with Stacey Roberts, a physical therapist and registered nurse who is co principal investigator on a study using shockwave for painful sex, to explain what the technology actually does, why blood flow changes everything for a guarded pelvic floor, and how the same science reaches erectile dysfunction and incontinence. If sex hurts and you have been told to just relax, this conversation offers a real explanation and real hope.

This episode is brought to you by SRC Health. Shop SRC garments at blueberrytherapyshop.ca and use the code SRC15 for 15% off.

What you will learn

Stacey explains the difference between true shockwave and the many devices that borrow the name, how flooding tissue with blood flow lets an upregulated pelvic floor soften and let go, and why she pairs shockwave with pelvic floor physiotherapy in her research and her clinic. You will also hear why the musculoskeletal syndrome of menopause makes so much ache at once, why the marketed pelvic floor chair is often the wrong tool, and the plain truth about painful sex that no glass of wine will ever fix.

In this episode

• [00:00] Sports medicine to a women's health clinic on Australia's Gold Coast
• [03:40] Why a physiotherapist went back to school to become a nurse
• [04:45] The musculoskeletal syndrome of menopause and hormones as anti inflammatories
• [06:50] The Pain Free Formula and reducing pain without surgery or drugs
• [12:00] The one belief about pain she wants to blow up
• [14:00] Shockwave explained, and the wild west of devices that borrow the name
• [15:30] Shockwave for painful sex and the upregulated pelvic floor
• [16:30] The research: pelvic floor physio plus sham versus plus active shockwave
• [20:50] Shockwave for erectile dysfunction, endothelial dysfunction and nitric oxide
• [23:20] Leaking after prostate surgery and blood flow as nourishment
• [25:00] Why the chair is often the wrong tool for a tight pelvic floor
• [34:30] Painful sex and the one thing she would say to someone told to grin and bear it

About Stacey Roberts

Stacey Roberts, PT RN MSN, is a physical therapist and registered nurse with more than thirty years of clinical experience. She owns New You Health and Wellness in Wauwatosa, Wisconsin, teaches shockwave therapy to clinicians across North America, hosts The Pain Free Formula podcast, and wrote The Pain Free Formula. She is co principal investigator on a study using shockwave for painful sex.

Theme Song: I'll Be There for You by The Rembrandts

Key topics covered: shockwave therapy, painful sex, dyspareunia, the upregulated pelvic floor, erectile dysfunction, post prostatectomy incontinence, musculoskeletal syndrome of menopause, hormones, gut health.

Our Sponsor: SRC Health

SRC makes medical grade compression garments for pregnancy, bladder leaks and mild pelvic organ prolapse. The Restore short is the one Kristen reaches for most in clinic. It supports your pelvic organs while you and your pelvic floor physiotherapist do the strengthening work.

Blueberry Therapy has carried SRC garments for years. Shop the full range at Blueberry Shop, same price as buying direct and shipped from the clinic in Canada. Use the code SRC15 for 15% off.

Many extended health plans cover compression garments with a prescription, so check your benefits before you assume you are paying out of pocket.

Resources and references mentioned

• The Pain Free Formula by Stacey Roberts: Amazon
• Find a SoftWave provider in Canada and the United States: SoftWave TRT provider finder
• New You Health and Wellness: newyouhealthandwellness.com

Listen to more episodes like this (all at podcast.blueberrytherapy.ca)

• Painful Sex: When Your Body is Not the Problem with Dr. Jordin Wiggins
• Vaginismus Isn't in Your Head and Here's Why with Dr. Janelle Frederick
• Erections and Heart Health: The Vital Sign Men Ignore with Dr. Elliot Justin
• Pelvic Pain Is a Symptom, Not a Diagnosis with Dr. Alopi Patel
• The Intersection of Menopause and Sexual Health with Dr. Maureen Slattery

Connect with Stacey

Website newyouhealthandwellness.com, her podcast The Pain Free Formula, and TikTok @the_pain_free_formula.

Work with us

Wondering whether your pelvic floor is behind your pain or painful sex? Book a pelvic health assessment at blueberrytherapy.ca, and we offer virtual visits across Ontario. Subscribe to The Hole Shebang at podcast.blueberrytherapy.ca, and if this episode helped you, leave a review and tell us what you want to hear next.

Connect with The Hole Shebang on Instagram @blueberrytherapypelvichealth.

Pediatric pelvic health is the part of physiotherapy almost nobody talks about, and it might be exactly what your child needs. Bedwetting, daytime leaks, poop accidents, and recurring UTIs are not things every kid simply outgrows, and they are very often driven by something most parents never suspect: constipation. In this episode of The Hole Shebang, Kristen Parise talks with pediatric pelvic health physiotherapist Keri Martin Vrbanac about how bladder and bowel problems show up in children, what a child friendly pelvic assessment really involves, and the honest answer to the question every tired parent asks about waiting it out.

What You Will Learn

How constipation quietly drives bladder leaks, bedwetting, and recurring UTIs in kids. Why daily pooping does not mean your child is in the clear. What a pelvic assessment with a child looks like, and why it never involves internal work. When to stop waiting for a child to grow out of bedwetting. Why early potty training can set a child up for problems. How stress, school bathrooms, and family change all land on a little pelvic floor.

In This Episode

• [01:02] Keri's path into pediatric pelvic health, and the personal reason behind it
• [03:31] Constipation as an epidemic, and the real estate analogy every parent should hear
• [06:05] Busting the myth that bedwetting and accidents are laziness or behaviour
• [08:36] Why Keri talks about poop loudly, and the "Keri with poop" headshot
• [09:33] What a pelvic assessment with a child actually looks like
• [14:31] What constipation really is, beyond pooping less than three times a week
• [19:38] First steps in treatment: biofeedback, breathing, and toilet posture
• [23:50] The school button story, and why kids will not use the bathroom at school
• [26:58] At what point a parent should stop waiting for a child to grow out of it
• [27:50] Potty training readiness, and why eighteen months is too early
• [30:15] Fluids before bed, and the hormone behind nighttime dryness
• [31:45] Constipation treatment options, from RestoraLAX to the Modified O'Regan Protocol
• [35:53] The book It's No Accident, and the long term cost of leaving it untreated
• [40:33] How family stress and big changes affect a child's pelvic floor

About Keri Martin Vrbanac

Keri Martin Vrbanac is a Registered Physiotherapist and pelvic health physiotherapist who has practised for decades and owns A Body In Motion Rehabilitation in the Kitchener Waterloo area. She works with all ages and all genders, with a deep focus on pediatric pelvic health, pregnancy and postpartum, pelvic pain, incontinence, and prolapse. She is trauma informed, an educator who teaches the pediatric pelvic floor course for Pelvic Health Solutions, a clinic owner, and a mom of two young women.

Theme Song: Masterpiece by Jessie J

Resources and References Mentioned

• It's No Accident by Dr. Steve Hodges, pediatric urologist
• The Modified O'Regan Protocol (MOP), originally developed by Dr. O'Regan and currently maintained by Dr. Steve Hodges
• RestoraLAX, an osmotic stool softener
• Desmopressin, a medication that mimics the natural overnight hormone that reduces urine production

Listen to More Episodes Like This

• The Scoop on Kids Poop: The Secret World of Pediatric Pelvic Health with Clare Bourne
• Floored by the Truth: Demystifying Pelvic Health from Teens to Menopause with Dr. Sara Reardon
• From Physiotherapist to Lactation Consulting with Laura Doyle

Connect with Keri

Website: abodyinmotion.ca Instagram: @kerivpelvicpt and @abodyinmotionrehab Facebook: Keri V Pelvic PT, and A Body In Motion Rehabilitation

Keep Listening and Connect

New episodes of The Hole Shebang every week. Subscribe wherever you listen, and leave a review to help more families find this conversation. Learn more about pelvic health for every age at blueberrytherapy.ca. Connect with The Hole Shebang on Instagram @blueberrytherapypelvichealth.

The only awkward conversation is the one we're not having.

Pelvic floor training for athletes is the missing piece in most performance programs, and this episode of The Hole Shebang makes the case for putting it back. Kristen Parise sits down with Dr. Rachel Selman, a pelvic floor physical therapist, strength and conditioning coach and sport scientist, to explain why athletes experience more pelvic floor dysfunction than non athletes, how the pelvic floor acts as a force absorber for the whole body, and why leaking during sport is common but never normal. If you run, lift, jump or coach anyone who does, this conversation reframes pelvic health as performance.

What you will learn

Rachel breaks down why the location of the pelvic floor at the base of the core makes it vulnerable to the pressure of sport, how symptoms like urinary leakage, urgency and even chronic hamstring and groin strains connect back to pressure the pelvic floor is not managing, and the four part program she brings to teams. You will also hear why prolapse does not mean the end of running or lifting, and how pessaries and external supports fit into a return to sport plan.

In this episode

• [00:00] From soccer player to pelvic floor PT: Rachel's own postpartum wake up call
• [05:10] What to actually tell someone who is pregnant or soon to be about movement
• [09:45] Her book Floor It and who it is written for
• [13:28] Why athletes carry more pelvic floor dysfunction, and the symptoms to watch
• [20:20] The four part team program: education, screen, questionnaire, one biased workout a month
• [29:49] The trampoline: pelvic floor as force absorber
• [33:59] Connective tissue, creep and the grocery bag analogy for endurance athletes
• [38:26] Overcoming isometrics and the sled push
• [43:05] Prolapse, pessaries and getting back to what you love

About Dr. Rachel Selman

Dr. Rachel Selman, PT DPT CSCS CPSS, is a physical therapist, strength and conditioning coach and sport scientist who treats and trains athletes at Synthesis Physical Therapy in Charlotte, North Carolina. Her first book, Floor It: Using the Pelvic Floor to Power Athletic Performance, releases October 6 2026.

Theme Song: Cruel Summer by Taylor Swift

Key topics covered: pelvic floor and athletic performance, leaking when running, force absorption, prolapse and return to sport, pessaries, overcoming isometrics, postpartum return to exercise.

Resources and references mentioned

• Floor It by Dr. Rachel Selman (pre-order): Simon and Schuster
• Sports Medicine and the Pelvic Floor: Science to Practice by Gráinne M. Donnelly: Elsevier
• Overcoming isometrics demos on Rachel's Instagram

Listen to more episodes like this (all at podcast.blueberrytherapy.ca)

• The New Postpartum Exercise Guidelines That Ditch the Six Week Rule with Dr. Margie Davenport
• Pelvic Floor Basics: Why Kegels Are Only Half the Story with Lauren Ohayon
• Prolapse and Pessaries: Losing the Shame with the Vagina Coach Kim Vopni
• Empowering Exercise During Pregnancy with Dr. Christina Prevett
• Simple Strength: What Really Works for Women's Fitness with Dr. Lauren Colenso-Semple

Connect with Rachel

Instagram and YouTube @Dr.RachelSelman, and www.SynthesisPerform.com.

Work with us

Wondering whether your pelvic floor is keeping up with your training? Book a pelvic health assessment at blueberrytherapy.ca, and we offer virtual visits across Ontario. Subscribe to The Hole Shebang at podcast.blueberrytherapy.ca, and if this episode helped you, leave a review and tell us what you want to hear next.

Connect with The Hole Shebang on Instagram @blueberrytherapypelvichealth.

Your erections are a vital sign, and almost nobody is reading them. In this episode of The Hole Shebang, pelvic health physiotherapist Kristen Parise talks with Dr. Elliot Justin, an emergency medicine physician who spent 40 years and roughly 180,000 patient encounters in trauma and cardiac care before founding FirmTech and inventing the TechRing, the first wearable that measures erectile fitness during sleep and during sex. They unpack why nocturnal erections are a canary in the coal mine for cardiovascular disease, why most men who think they have erectile dysfunction actually do not, how erection rings and tracking are changing penile rehabilitation after prostate surgery, and what testosterone, HRT and the new Clitique clitoral health device mean for women. This is sexual health as preventative medicine, with zero shame and a lot of data.

In This Episode

• [00:00] From 40 years in emergency medicine to the penis as the most under measured vital sign
• [02:00] The horse accident, spinal research and Project O
• [05:00] Why nocturnal erections matter and reinventing the erection ring with a bra hook
• [08:45] How many erections a healthy man should have at night
• [09:30] Erections as a cardiac early warning, and the data that changed marriages
• [10:30] Does the same hold for women and clitoral blood flow
• [13:00] One size fits all medicine, dosing, testosterone and HRT
• [17:00] Why most men who think they have ED do not, and "Viagra is Vicodin"
• [21:30] Why erection rings work, and who figured it out first
• [24:30] Prostate surgery, penile rehabilitation and real recovery stories
• [30:00] The June Orgasm a Day Challenge and why orgasms are healthcare
• [33:00] HRT and testosterone for women
• [36:00] The Clitique, the first clitoral health monitor
• [39:30] Theme song and where to find Elliot

What You Will Learn

You will learn what a healthy night of erections actually looks like and why three to five of them are keeping the tissue alive. You will learn why a drop in that number can predict a cardiac event years before the heart shows symptoms, why a pill is sometimes a band aid on a serious problem, and why erection rings, long dismissed as novelties, are now part of real penile rehabilitation after prostate surgery. You will also hear why the same vascular logic applies to women and the clitoris, and why testosterone and HRT belong in the conversation for both sexes.

About Dr. Elliot Justin

Dr. Elliot Justin, MD, FACEP, is the CEO, inventor and founder of FirmTech. He completed his emergency medicine residency at Hennepin in Minneapolis, earned his MD at Boston University School of Medicine and holds a BA cum laude in Slavic Languages and Literature from Harvard. Over four decades in emergency medicine he logged roughly 180,000 patient encounters with a perfect malpractice record, founded SwiftMD, the second oldest telemedicine provider in the United States, and built Pegasus Emergency Group into the fastest growing company in its sector before selling it. He has presented sexual health research at ISSM, ESSM, SSMNA and SHA, appeared on more than 200 podcasts, funds anti slavery rescue work through the Pegasus Liberty Foundation and wrote the historical novel The Chastity of Honor.

Theme Song: I Won't Back Down by Tom Petty

Key Topics Covered

Nocturnal erections as a vital sign, erectile dysfunction versus normal aging, cardiovascular early warning signs, erection rings and how they work, penile rehabilitation after prostatectomy, testosterone optimization, hormone replacement therapy for women, clitoral health and the Clitique, the health benefits of orgasms.

Resources and References Mentioned

• FirmTech and the TechRing, and the FirmTech science and research page
• The TechRing product page, and the MaxPR constriction ring for penile rehabilitation
• Dr. Mohit Khera, Baylor College of Medicine, the andrologist who said "Viagra is Vicodin"
• Melissa Hadley Barrett, Prostate Cancer Penile Rehabilitation Program, Restorative Health Clinic, Perth
• Dr. Rachel Rubin, urologist and primary investigator for the Clitique research
• The Chastity of Honor by Elliot Justin on Kindle

Listen to More Episodes Like This

• Sex, Pelvic Health and Breaking Taboos with Dr. Rachel Gelman
• Clitoral Vibration as Healthcare Not Just Pleasure with Natalia Banton
• Sex After Prostate Cancer: Hope and Rehab with Victoria Cullen
• Perimenopause and Hormone Replacement with Dr. Alison Shea

Connect

Find Dr. Elliot Justin and FirmTech at myfirmtech.com and on Instagram at @doctorelliotjustin and @myfirmtech.

Book a free fifteen minute discovery call at blueberrytherapy.ca. We offer virtual pelvic health consultations across Ontario.

Connect with The Hole Shebang on Instagram @blueberrytherapypelvichealth. The only awkward conversation is the one we are not having.

Medical gaslighting is what happens when a woman names her pain and is told it is probably nothing. In this episode of The Hole Shebang, pelvic health physiotherapist Kristen Parise sits down with writer and TEDx speaker Kayla Branstetter, whose new book Don't Be an Athena: Women's Stories of Surviving Medical Misogyny collects true stories of abortion, birth and infertility, three of the most policed and silenced experiences a body can have. Kayla is finishing a doctorate in healthcare focused on narrative medicine, the idea that a patient's story is clinical data and not background noise. Together they unpack medical misogyny, self advocacy and the small, doable shifts that help women feel heard in the exam room.

What you will learn

You will learn why women are trained to be Athenas, the good patient who endures in silence and asks for nothing, and what that posture costs. You will hear the gentle practices that change an appointment, from journals in waiting rooms to the one question a provider can ask before looking at the screen. And you will learn the rights every patient has and rarely uses, including the right to a second opinion and to your own medical records.

In this episode

• [00:46] The first conversations that became the book, and why women carry secrets for decades
• [03:46] The Athena and Medusa myth, and how women are made into monsters
• [08:38] Why feeling unheard is universal, across red states and blue states
• [11:08] Tony's story, generational trauma and human resilience
• [18:17] Medical gaslighting, narrative medicine and journals in waiting rooms
• [24:07] The dentist who ended the shame, and why the feel of a clinic matters
• [31:40] What to do today if you walked out feeling dismissed
• [37:26] Feeling visible, sex education and the case for telling the stories

About Kayla Branstetter

Kayla Branstetter holds a Master of Arts in Liberal Studies from the University of Denver and is a doctoral candidate in healthcare education focused on narrative medicine. She is a TEDx speaker, an award winning artist and a professor of English at Crowder College, and her writing has appeared in more than forty journals. Her book Don't Be an Athena releases July 20 2026.

Theme Song: I Can Do It With a Broken Heart by Taylor Swift

Key topics covered: medical gaslighting, medical misogyny, narrative medicine, self advocacy, reproductive health stories, ending the shame.

Resources and references mentioned

• Don't Be an Athena: Women's Stories of Surviving Medical Misogyny by Kayla Branstetter, out July 20 2026. Available on Amazon in hardcover and ebook, Barnes and Noble, Walmart and Ozark Hollow Press. The publisher option is usually the lowest price.
• Don't Be an Athena, Kayla's TEDxMSSU talk
• Dr. Rita Charon and narrative medicine, the practice of asking what do you want me to know before looking at the screen
• The American Girl Body Book, an age appropriate body and period education book Kayla reads with her daughter

Listen to more episodes like this

• From PMDD Hell to Heaven on Earth with Heather Hendrie, on three decades of being told to suck it up
• Super Traits and the Real Reason Your Sex Drive Disappeared with Dr. Jordin Wiggins, on being gaslit by providers and learning to advocate
• The Fatigue Your Family Doctor Is Missing with Dr. Margot Lattanzi, on what your bloodwork is normal really misses

Working through pain, dismissal or symptoms you have been told to ignore? Learn more about pelvic health physiotherapy at blueberrytherapy.ca.

Connect with Kayla

• Website: kaylabranstetter.com
• Instagram: @kbranstetter87
• LinkedIn: Kayla Branstetter

Subscribe to The Hole Shebang, leave a review and tell us what you want to hear next. Listen at podcast.blueberrytherapy.ca and connect with The Hole Shebang on Instagram @blueberrytherapypelvichealth.

You have done the work. The books, the affirmations, the years of talking it through. So why does the same pattern keep running. In this episode of The Hole Shebang, Kristen Parise sits down with Ramona Kossowan, Canada's first certified Gentle Trauma Release practitioner, to explain why so much healing stays stuck in the head and never reaches the body. They get into what trauma actually is, why the nervous system keeps you bracing long after the threat is gone, how food noise and people pleasing are nervous system signals rather than willpower failures, and the vagus nerve thread that connects all of it to pelvic floor health. If you have ever wondered why insight alone has not changed your life, this conversation reframes the whole thing.

What you will learn

That trauma is frequently a slow drip rather than one shocking event, that the body holds what the mind cannot reason away, and that clearing has to happen below the level of thought before any amount of doing will stick. Ramona walks through what a session looks like, why it is gentle by design, and the two protocols she gives clients to use on their own.

In this episode

• [00:38] From a decade in fitness to trauma work, and the moment the workout stopped being the whole answer
• [03:03] What Gentle Trauma Release actually is: distress without resolve, the unfinished loop in the body
• [05:08] A real client story: divorce, the residue, and the whole organic process from clearing to a trauma free identity
• [09:00] What clearing means, and the science underneath it (polyvagal theory, the body keeps the score, EMDR style eye movements)
• [13:17] Big T and little T trauma, and the slow drip of not worthy, not lovable
• [16:41] Ramona's own story: motherhood, patriarchal religion, the sister wound, learning to be seen
• [19:15] The vagus nerve, the pelvic floor and why the body locks down
• [22:50] The protocols you can run yourself: the basic recipe and the emotional release recipe
• [34:42] Food noise, scarcity and why diets backfire until the body feels safe
• [38:13] Where to find Ramona, and the theme song

About the guest

Ramona Kossowan is a women's empowerment coach, Gentle Trauma Release practitioner and fitness trainer based in Crossfield, Alberta. In 2021 she became the first certified Gentle Trauma Release practitioner in Canada. She works with women across Canada, the United States and the UK, helping them clear what is anchoring trauma in the body so the rest of their lives can soften and open.

Theme Song: Simply The Best by Tina Turner

Key topics covered

Trauma stored in the body, nervous system regulation, the vagus nerve and pelvic floor, polyvagal theory, food noise, people pleasing and overfunctioning, body image, somatic healing, women's empowerment after divorce.

Resources and references mentioned

• Gentle Trauma Release Institute, the international training school Ramona certified through
• The Body Keeps the Score by Dr. Bessel van der Kolk, referenced as a foundation of the embodied trauma model
• Polyvagal theory (Dr. Stephen Porges), the nervous system framework underpinning the work
• Dr. Gabor Mate's work on trauma, referenced by Kristen
• Ramona's signature program, Energized and Empowered Woman
• Moderation 365, the nutrition method Ramona is certified in

Listen to more episodes like this

• Ep67 How Breathwork Heals Chronic Illness and Nervous System Dysregulation with Jenn Mansell
• Ep43 Body Brilliance: Connecting the Dots Between Emotional Eating, Hormones and Pelvic Health with Amber Romaniuk
• Ep47 Rewiring Pain: From Velociraptors to Victory with Dr. Laura Katz
• Learn more about trauma informed pelvic health care at blueberrytherapy.ca

Connect with Ramona

• Website: ramonakcoaching.com
• Gentle Trauma Release: gentletraumacoach.com
• Instagram: @ramonakcoaching
• LinkedIn: Ramona Kossowan

Listen, subscribe and review

New episodes of The Hole Shebang drop every week. Listen and subscribe at podcast.blueberrytherapy.ca. Connect with The Hole Shebang on Instagram @blueberrytherapypelvichealth.

The only awkward conversation is the one we are not having.

Building muscle in menopause is not only possible, it might be the single most important thing a woman can do for the next 30 years of her life. In this episode of The Hole Shebang, Kristen Parise sits down again with muscle scientist Stuart Phillips, PhD to unpack what really happens to a woman's muscle through perimenopause and menopause, how much protein women actually need and why lifting weights matters far more than any supplement. They also get into the part that lands closest to home for pelvic health: why continence is the number one self reported disabling condition of aging, and what that means for the pelvic floor as skeletal muscle.

In This Episode

• [02:05] Why the ACSM resistance training guidelines were finally refreshed after 17 years
• [05:54] Lifting bakes the cake, protein is the sprinkles: getting the order right
• [07:18] How Stuart publicly changed his mind on animal versus plant protein
• [10:06] Busting the 30 minute anabolic window myth
• [15:23] What actually happens to a woman's muscle through perimenopause and menopause
• [17:13] Why women build muscle as well as men before menopause
• [20:22] The zone of chaos: why perimenopause is not a light switch
• [29:00] You do not have to lift heavy, you just have to lift
• [31:00] Why bone loves impact and 20 stomps a day does the job
• [34:11] How much protein a woman really needs, in real food
• [38:37] The McCall MacBain gift and why healthspan beats longevity
• [46:03] The continence reveal: the number one disabling condition of aging

What You Will Learn

You will walk away knowing why resistance training is the real driver of strength in midlife, why getting started matters more than getting it perfect and how much protein to aim for without obsessing over timing or supplements. You will understand what menopause does to muscle, why it is never too late to begin and how all of this connects to bladder, bowel and pelvic floor health.

About Stuart Phillips

Stuart M. Phillips, PhD is a Distinguished University Professor and the Tier 1 Canada Research Chair in Skeletal Muscle Health at McMaster University in Hamilton, where he also chairs the Department of Kinesiology and directs the Physical Activity Centre of Excellence. He has published more than 400 papers, chaired the 2026 ACSM resistance training position stand and co-hosts the Real Exercise Science podcast.

Theme Song: We Are the Champions by Queen

Key Topics Covered

Menopause and muscle, perimenopause muscle loss, resistance training for women, protein needs for women, the anabolic window myth, bone health and impact, healthspan versus longevity, incontinence and aging, pelvic floor as muscle.

Resources and References Mentioned

• 2026 ACSM resistance training guidelines (Stuart was the chair)
• The McCall MacBain Kinesiology and Healthspan Institute at McMaster
• Nutrient Timing by John Ivy, the book behind the anabolic window idea
• Canadian Longitudinal Study on Aging
• Real Exercise Science podcast, Stuart's show with Martin Gibala

Listen to More Episodes Like This

Find every episode of The Hole Shebang at podcast.blueberrytherapy.ca.

• Protein in Perimenopause: How much you really need with Dr. Stuart Phillips
• Sleep, Sex and Menopause with Dr. Woganee Filate (Episode 89)
• Inflammation, Hormones and the Foods That Heal with Julie Daniluk (Episode 90)
• Blueberry Therapy pelvic floor physiotherapy services
• Blueberry Therapy perimenopause and menopause support

Connect with Stuart Phillips

• Instagram: @mackinprof
• LinkedIn: stuartphillipsmcmaster
• Link hub: linktr.ee/mackinprof

Keep Listening

New episodes of The Hole Shebang drop every week. Subscribe wherever you listen, leave a review and visit blueberrytherapy.ca to learn more about pelvic health physiotherapy in Hamilton, Ontario.

Connect with The Hole Shebang on Instagram @blueberrytherapypelvichealth

You have been told there is nothing else to try for your pelvic pain. Dr. Alopi Patel is the reason that sentence is wrong. She is a dual board certified anesthesiologist and interventional pain physician based in New York, a Fellow of the American Society of Anesthesiologists, certified in lifestyle medicine, co-author of the Pelvic Pain Journal, and one half of The Female Pain Docs with her partner Dr. Meera Kirpekar. She walked into a fellowship where only 18% of attending pain physicians were women, decided that "we can offer medications and that is about it" was not going to be her answer, and built the next room. This is the conversation every pelvic pain patient and clinician needs.

What You Will Learn

• Alopi's five part approach to pelvic pain in order: lifestyle, physical therapy, medications, injections, surgical considerations, and why physical therapy is the foundation, not the last resort
• What an interventional pain physician actually offers: trigger point injections, peripheral nerve blocks like pudendal and ilioinguinal, and sympathetic blocks like ganglion impar and superior hypogastric for endometriosis
• How she approaches trans pelvic health, the suppositories almost no one is talking about openly, and the research she is building because the evidence base is missing

In This Episode

• [00:01] Welcome to The Hole Shebang
• [00:57] From anesthesiology to pain medicine: why she missed the continuity of care
• [02:30] The 18% statistic and the moment she felt the disconnect in the room
• [03:14] "We can offer medications and that is about it" and the decision to learn everything
• [04:49] A real day in clinic: pelvic congestion syndrome, post-op pelvic floor dysfunction, postpartum pelvic pain
• [06:50] Pelvic pain is a symptom, not a diagnosis: her favourite part of the job
• [07:24] Abdominal pelvic pain matters too: trigger points above and below the belly button
• [08:00] The peripheral nerves she can block in office: pudendal, ilioinguinal, iliohypogastric, genitofemoral, lateral femoral cutaneous, plus the fluoroscopic blocks in the OR
• [08:48] Patient education on a blank piece of paper: muscles, peripheral nerves, nerve roots, sympathetic chain
• [10:16] Endometriosis pain: ganglion impar for rectal pain, superior hypogastric plexus for uterine pain
• [11:01] Are nerve blocks one and done? The bajillion dollar question
• [12:16] The three legged stool: injections plus lifestyle plus physical therapy
• [13:25] The Pelvic Pain Journal with Dr. Meera Kirpekar, and why a journal was the right tool
• [15:38] The Hurt podcast and the topics drawing the biggest listener response: perimenopause, menopause, sex after menopause
• [17:40] The psychology degree and biopsychosocial care: connecting fast, being a coach and collaborator
• [20:29] Pride Month and trans pelvic health: the five part approach for transfeminine and transmasculine surgical patients
• [24:41] Suppositories explained: baclofen and diazepam for muscle relaxation, mixed evidence, strong patient reports
• [26:32] Direct message to the woman listening with pelvic pain: ask questions and advocate for yourself
• [27:36] Research with medical students: trigger point injection outcomes, pudendal nerve block duration, botulinum toxin in the pelvic floor
• [29:33] Where The Female Pain Docs is going next: international reach, and men have pelvic pain too
• [31:37] Upcoming: American Society of Anesthesiologists in October, women's health in the workplace in December
• [34:00] The new clitoral mapping from Amsterdam, 30 years after the penis was mapped
• [35:53] Where to find Alopi, plus her theme song

About Dr. Alopi Patel

Dr. Alopi Patel, M.D., FASA, is a dual board certified anesthesiologist and interventional pain physician, certified in lifestyle medicine. She graduated from Rutgers New Jersey Medical School, completed anesthesiology residency at Mount Sinai West and Morningside, and her pain medicine fellowship at Mount Sinai Hospital in New York. She practices in NYC, holds an academic appointment with Rutgers Robert Wood Johnson, treats chronic pelvic pain, women's pain conditions, transgender health, and a wide range of musculoskeletal pain, and is a women's health advocate and LGBTQ ally. She speaks English, Gujarati, and Hindi fluently and Spanish conversationally.

Connect with Dr. Alopi Patel

Website: thefemalepaindocs.com

Instagram: @alopipatelmd and @thefemalepaindocs

Podcast: The Hurt by The Female Pain Docs (with Dr. Meera Kirpekar) on Apple Podcasts, Spotify.

NotesBook: Pelvic Pain Journal (co-authored with Dr. Meera Kirpekar, Wellness Warrior Press)

A Note from Blueberry Therapy, If pelvic pain, bladder urgency, bowel trouble, painful intercourse, or post-surgical pelvic floor symptoms are part of your picture, the physical therapy leg of Dr. Patel's three legged stool is what we do every day. Blueberry Therapy's pelvic health physiotherapists work alongside pain physicians, gynecologists, and surgeons to build the multidisciplinary plan she described.

Book at blueberrytherapy.ca.

Connect with The Hole Shebang Visit blueberrytherapy.ca Subscribe to The Hole Shebang Podcast on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you listen Follow on Instagram: @blueberrytherapypelvichealth